Rank: Ace Attorney
Joined: Mon Jun 18, 2012 6:17 am
I've only joined these forums just last month, but I've found this site to be an outright wonderful experience. I just thought I'd like to contribute an idea of my own by starting this thread. I've peeked around and noticed that there's no specific thread for a topic like this. Moderators, if I've made any mistake with this, I apologize in advance. Please feel free to remove it.
Anyway, this is a thread dedicated to Ace Attorney fans who feel a need for a good laugh or two! Post your own jokes, comedic skits, or whatnot using our favorite characters of this series. A sense of visual arts or editing knowledge are not required, so write to your heart's content! And unlike the Sporking Threatre, this thread doesn't focus on parodying others' works; rather, it's a display of creative and witty writing skills (which is why it's here in the fanfiction forum).
Before I set things in motion, let's go over a few rules to keep it organized.
1. This is a creative writing thread focused around the Ace Attorney series. If you must write a parody on other works, please take it to the appropriate thread. Go ahead and play with OOC moments as you wish; they are welcomed.
2. Crossovers with other franchises are permitted. But remember, if someone needs a joke to be explained, you might need to tweak your work a bit. (Don't worry about first draft slip-ups! That's a part of becoming an ace writer!)
3. Fan-created characters are allowed only if they play minor roles. While I have no problem at all with them, having to describe a completely new character may take out the fun (and thus, the point) in these quick-writes.
4. There's no limit to length. But if you're planning a story, please keep it within a single chapter's worth. A joke isn't very healthy if it has to drag on for several pages. (And no, I don't mean brick jokes or running gags. They are allowed capriciously and sparingly across multiple posts, not within one.)
5. Please keep the competition down! We're here to share jokes and enjoy them, not best each other over who's the best comedian. You're free to critique others' works, but stay civil and polite. The last thing we want in here is a flame war
and I don't mean with flamethrowers
6. Always keep in mind as you're writing that if anything may appear misleading, spoiler-fraught, offensive, or possibly debate-worthy, leave it out. This includes rants of any sort and character bashing.
7. Last but not least, HAVE A GREAT TIME. This is a thread for jokes, after all!
Alrighty, am I leaving out anything else?
I probably have.
Then, I'll contribute a couple quickies from the top of my head here to start us off.
A TV star and a defense attorney unexpectedly meet in bar. After exchanging the usual greetings, they sit down and have some drinks.
"So, how's life been treating you, Mr. Powers?"
"Oh, it's been great! Our latest Nickel Samurai movie production was a great hit! The kids just love watching those kinds of fights. We're even considering a sequel."
"Wow, that's nice to hear."
"How about you, Mr. Wright? Been busy with cases?"
"I guess you could say that, but it's no blessing on the financial side, sadly. In fact, I've lately been concerned with those upcoming rental payments. They've just been piling on."
"Really? That's too bad. But I'd expected a famous defense attorney like you to find enough clients to at least pay off your rent. Or is your office really that high-maintenance?"
"Oh, no. It's not my rent that's the problem. It's Gumshoe's. The poor guy."
"Ah, for a moment there, I was a bit worried about that girl you're usually with."
"Oh, believe me, she's definitive proof of high maintenance. Just last night, her cravings robbed me of my latest paycheck!"
Kay just loves taking pictures wherever she goes, and she's rather proud about her collections. But there has always been one thing she wanted to catch a snapshot of: a terror-eyed Edgeworth. It almost seemed impossible to frighten the stoic and collected prosecutor. Then one day, she meets with Maya and Franziska, and decides to set a bet with them.
"Whoever of us can first catch a shot of his terror-filled face wins 50 bucks, and the other two will have to pay."
"Hmph! Such a foolishly simple task demands a much higher pay. I suggest 100."
"Just the right amount! I'm sure I got this in the bag."
"Each of us will be given three days, and then we'll meet back here. Alright, let's go!"
So for those three days, the girls tried to be as subtle about their plans as possible. Kay tried all sorts of tricks to get a scare out of her target, but was always returned with an irritated glare. Franziska resorted to threats of whip lashes when she couldn't defeat him in arguments, but he was too used to them to care. (Too bad for the detective that works with them, though.) Maya, meanwhile, took the first two days easy, as if she wasn't even trying to catch Edgeworth's attention. Then, on the third day, she goes right up to his office, politely asks to see him, and says one little thing. The prosecutor was out of the room so instantly that she almost missed a shot.
When the girls reunite, Kay and Franziska were dumbfounded.
"Just what did you say to him?"
"Oh, it was nothing much. I just told him that I last saw Larry by Gourd Lake sharing tales with Lotta about how much of a Steel Samurai fanboy Mr. Edgeworth was."
The other two were silent for a moment, and then Kay cracks up. Franziska simply smirks to herself. "I suppose I'll have something new to talk to him about next time."
Maya triumphantly declares, "Now where're those 100 bucks?"
Kay shakes her head, explaining, "Sorry, Maya. The bet was for his face. You only caught him rushing out."
Maya gasps in shock for a moment before sinking into a sigh. "Well, I guess I now owe Nick his 100."
Franziska asks, "Why do you owe that fool anything?"
"I bet him 100 bucks in a dare to go to Gourd Lake dressed as Larry and hit on Lotta."
The girls give each other curious stares, and they rush off to watch the fruits of Maya's labor.
Avi from a pic by こるの on Pixiv. If you don't get it, have a listen to the 2nd chapter of the GS5 voice drama