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The Practice RP topic (+ Tutorials!)Topic%20Title
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What is my liiiife?!?

Gender: Male

Location: UK

Rank: Admin

Joined: Tue Feb 27, 2007 11:02 am

Posts: 2504

Hello again. It's a me. I got a suggestion from The Don. (Serrot) to create a topic where people could practice their RP skills in. This is a very relaxed place, therefore, although Spam won't be tolerated. Also, this is where I'll be doing my RP Tutorials which should hopefully be helpful to you all. And where better to start than at the very beginning!

Creating a new RP, and Introducing your character.
Firstly, you need an idea. It doesn't have to be a new one, but it has to be different to the RP's already around or you won't interest people very much. Take the Apollo Justice RP for example; no-one here had done it, and it made sense. Try to pick an idea where people can fit into it, so it entices others. Once you have your idea, and a rough idea of where you want it to go, you can begin the topic. But it's best not to just go 'Heres what it's about, lets sign up'. RP signups take a long time to do, so often it's best to just start the story and then people will be drawn to it's activeness.

So, how do you start the RP? Well, the opening post in an RP needs to be longer than a normal post because you've got to set the scene. There's two simple parts. The Hook, and The Introduction. The Hook is a situation that makes people go 'WOW', which often doesn't involve the main characters. You know that post in my sig about the greatest man in the world; thats a fairly silly version of the opening hook. It gives you questions, like 'What was that masked man doing?' 'Why was he murdered', 'Who stole the Pink Panther Diamond?" and things like that. With a good opening premise, your RP is already off to a flying start.

The Introduction however, not only happens when you start an RP, but also whenever a new character is introduced or when a new person joins the RP. In this, you need to show us the character as if we've never seen them before; to give us the basic background information. It also needs to get us interested in the character, and the best way to do that is to make us wonder about them. Here is an example. I'm going to Pick it apart so we can easily analyse it. :)

Quote:
The rain was pattering on the roof of a rickety house in the slum district of LA (We now know where we are, and the rain influences our mood). Inside it, a man in a beanie hat was pouring beans into a can and heating it over a flame. (We see our character, and already we wonder who it is. The clues from the house and his food make us assume he's a hobo.) He zipped up his black jacket to protect himself from the cold and sighed, life was so different a few months before. (We get more questions, as well as more details. Our intrigue grows.) He used to be 'Phoenix Wright- Ace Attorney', but now he was just an ace hobo, and possibly not even 'ace' anymore. (And so we have our name. We now have the mystery of the identity solved, but it raises even further questions.)


So in our first post, we not only get sucked in by a dramatic scene but we then get interested in the character that is introduced. I could have easily had said 'In a rickety shack in LA, Phoenix Wright was warming beans in a can over the fire', but by witholding information and creating questions we get more interested in the story. :) Also, every time a new character is introduced, we can use 'The Introduction' to fully catch the readers attention. By the time you get there, the RP may have gone on for a while, but by keeping the readers interested your character will get noticed pretty quickly.

Ok everyone, pens at the ready! At the end of each tutorial, I'll be setting an optional excercise for you to do, to help you learn, and so I can be able to give advice on how you did and how to improve. See it as a way of showing the world that you now know what to do! (If you don't want to do the excercise, it's ok as well.) The task is 'Write an opening post for a fictional RP of your own choosing'. If you wish to do the task, just put a heading of 'An opening post for an RP about ___', and I should easily be able to spot it. Remember that since you have two things to consider, a 2 paragraph post is a good idea but you don't have to if you don't want to. Happy writing! ^_^
Re: The Practice RP topic (+ Tutorials!)Topic%20Title

ಠ_ಠ EYES

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Rank: Ace Attorney

Joined: Sun Apr 08, 2007 8:40 pm

Posts: 1035

Ha, the optional exercise thing is cute. <3
(AND OUR RP GOT A MENTION WA HA HA 8D)

And you know what, I'm gonna do it for the lulz.

'There was an omnious atmosphere in the courtroom. The silence enveloping the scene was unnatural- usually it would be filled with the muffled murmurs of the jury, tutting in disapproval at the defense's objections. But now, there was nothing, save for the tension. All eyes were focused on the young witness on the stand, as she shuffled on the spot in discomfort, twiddling her thumbs in an adorable fashion. The prosecutor opened his mouth to speak, but she cut him off before he could utter a word.
"... Sir... Your hair... It's... disturbing me..."
All at once, the courtoom erupted into life, and the gawping prosecutor shrunk slightly behind his desk.
All was normal once more.
All was (somewhat) well.
It was just another day in the life of Winston Payne... Or was it?'

[INSERT DRAMATIC MUSIC HERE]
The Practice RP (Opening post for "The coffee shop")Topic%20Title
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I may or may not be here.

Gender: Male

Location: Drinking a mug of hot chocolate

Rank: Ace Attorney

Joined: Thu Nov 29, 2007 11:58 pm

Posts: 4916

I'm glad this idea got used and I like the practice being tied in with the tutorial. Now it's my turn huh?
I'll be using an idea I've been kicking around for a while. An RP about the building and running of a coffee shop.


A man was walking done the quiet street. The sun was just starting to rise over the nearby hills and there wasn't a cloud in the sky. He put his hands into the pockets of his brown leather jacket to keep them out of the cold wind that was blowing. He felt the keys in his right hand and smiled. It took him a long time to get them and now it was time to move on to the next chapter of his life.

He finally came to a small, one story, run down green building in the center of town. The paint was fading, the windows were all broken, and the entire place was in a state of disrepair. Donald Serrot let out a sigh, adjusted the fedora on his head, and grabbed a hammer. It was time to start working on the coffee shop he always wanted to open.

How was that?
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What is my liiiife?!?

Gender: Male

Location: UK

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Joined: Tue Feb 27, 2007 11:02 am

Posts: 2504

Yay! You both got it. Interestingly, you both opted to mix the hook and the introduction together, instead of creating a prologue. A prologue is optional though, and sometimes the story doesn't need it, like in yours. Well done! *Gives Doylie and The Don a cookie*
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Prufursurnkfa fushcatchurrr

Gender: Male

Location: Evil Dutchieland

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A frog was sitting in a pond. He was called Joe. Joe the frog. He was a married frog, with two grownup male frogs and a girl and a boy tadpole. He was at working, catching flies for his family and kids.
"They're lucky they have me doing all the hard work." sighed Joe, catching another fly and putting it into a small bag next to him made of a leaf.
When he'd caught enough, he went home, and opened the door.
"I'm hooome!"
But he got no answer.
"I'm hoooooooooooooooome!"
No answer again.
He went into the living room, only to meet emptiness.
"What's ha---"

Joe was scooped up by a giant hand smelling like massage oil. He was killed because it strangled him between the thumb and the forefinger.
"Ooh la la! C'est un big one!" said Jean Armstrong, and went back to Très Bien.



Hurrr :D
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What is my liiiife?!?

Gender: Male

Location: UK

Rank: Admin

Joined: Tue Feb 27, 2007 11:02 am

Posts: 2504

Aww... poor Joe. :( Another good introduction, with extra kudos points for emotional writing! :) *Gives Tinker Cookie*
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e × e = e²

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Joined: Wed May 02, 2007 8:17 pm

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The food on the plate had barely shifted, the steam long gone in the shadow of the would-be devourer. For minutes, now closing in on an hour, she had sat there in meditation - though by any modern standard of yoga practice, indeed mere common sense, she was hardly sound of mind as she wordlessly clutched at her hairline, brunette strands spraying out to either side of her face. She looked across at the familiar man and his smile, a forgotten expression that she usually saw by her bedside, and now joined her at the table for dinner.
"It felt good, didn't it?" She nodded. "And you liked it, too." She nodded again. "Did you think of him?" She didn't move at all. "You weren't, really, but you remembered him nonetheless." She tried to breathe deeply but her lungs seemed to heaved the oxygen out like poison. "Was it... too good, in fact? Maybe you loved him a little, for thirty-seven minutes and twenty-eight seconds, even." She shook her head this time. "Of course not. That's not what you want, and that's not what he wanted at the time. But it wouldn't have felt good if you didn't remember."
She reached across the table and picked up the picture frame, hugging it to her chest. "I'm so sorry, Miles. I've been a bad girl."

The answering machine clicked and beeped. This is Ema Skye. Please leave a message.
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What is my liiiife?!?

Gender: Male

Location: UK

Rank: Admin

Joined: Tue Feb 27, 2007 11:02 am

Posts: 2504

Yey! Once again, another excellent, if slightly disturbing, post. *Gives Bee a cookie*
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NOW TAKE IT TO THE LAUNCH PAD!

Gender: Female

Location: UK

Rank: Prosecutor

Joined: Sun Sep 16, 2007 3:40 pm

Posts: 630

I wanna brush up my skills after seeing the notice...

The pen rushed across the chalkboard as faint snores filled the classroom. Drool was coming from the snorer, a girl who had to be in highschool.
Then again, this was highschool.
"AYA MIKAGE!"

A piece of chalk flew through the air as it hit the girl, she awoke with shock and rubbed her head, a chalk shaped mark now there.
"You may enjoy sleeping, but in my class, you stay awake and pay attention!" The physic teacher yelled.
Aya rubbed her eyes.
"Aw...what a total wig out. I bet he's wearing one too..." She suddenly realized that he was looking at her, her eyes glued to his hair.

"Did you just think up some funny remark? Here's an even funnier one. Detention. Cleaning. Physics Room. After School."
Aya groaned as the teacher whipped out another piece of chalk and started writing again.

Is that ok?
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Art by the talented Vickinator, thank you! ^_^
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What is my liiiife?!?

Gender: Male

Location: UK

Rank: Admin

Joined: Tue Feb 27, 2007 11:02 am

Posts: 2504

Yep, it is. You can introduce the story any way you want to, and we're already intrigued by your character. :) *Gives Dahlia Cookie*

Everyone who takes part gets a cookie, so don't be shy! HAVE A GO! And please, can this topic and the 'gloves are off' one be stickied!
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I may or may not be here.

Gender: Male

Location: Drinking a mug of hot chocolate

Rank: Ace Attorney

Joined: Thu Nov 29, 2007 11:58 pm

Posts: 4916

When are we going to get the next tutorial? I'm really anxious to work on my RP skills some more!
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Yuki Fan~!

Gender: Male

Location: Monica and Chandler's house

Rank: Ace Attorney

Joined: Sun Nov 25, 2007 7:48 pm

Posts: 1118

((Please give a description of your charater before you join.))

Name: Nick Ash

Occupation: Doctor

Age: 23

Appierance: Black, messy hair, blue eyes, wears a blue jumper with the text 'justice for all!' on it.

Misc facts: Has a mysterious bandage on his arm, he refuses to tell anyone about it.

Phoenix sat comfortably in his seat. He looked into the starless sky and held a cup of coffee in his hand. He sipped it and sighed. He had a rough day. When he looked into his cup, he saw not a black liquid, but a pool of darkness. Well that's what he thought.. Perhaps he was going mad.. he sipped, waiting for his phone to ring..
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stirring

Gender: Female

Rank: Ace Attorney

Joined: Tue Feb 27, 2007 5:26 pm

Posts: 4791

"Ah, I look beautiful. Such beauty! I can imagine men- they are drooling. I am drooling. Why wouldn't I be? This beauty. It is me! I am beauty." With a shoddy dash of flesh colored lipstick to her cringing smile, these words were quickly thrown from Meri's mouth at the speed of her free-falling tears. There she was! In the mirror. This woman. This beautiful woman! Could it be her? She has returned! Meri, the magnificent Meri, has returned! Even more gorgeous than before!

Winking to the glass before her (and returning the favor several times, as it did so as well), Meri twirled about the powder room. Everything was okay now! Everything was all right! Her smile, her legs! Even her breasts seemed perkier! The make-up hid it all so well! Since the fire -that horrible fire- Stephan and all of his disgusting friends never looked the same way at her again! But it could not have been her body. No, looking at her reflection one more time, it could not be such a thing. Those scars are barely visible...

"Why then? Why was I abandoned? Was it the dress? It was so expensive, oh Stephan must have been horrified! But it's okay Stephan! I have fixed it. I have repaired the unrepairable! I will wear it for you and everything will be all right, right? You can't even see the patches ... My talent! Oh, my talent!"

Dancing onto the balcony of her suite, the model sang out in cheer. For the first time in a full year, the girl felt like her old self again. "Will Stephan feel the same way?" She thought out loud, looking out to the starry night sky.

Dancing with optimism, imagining that handsome fellow as her partner, young Meri gushed and squealed with delight. "He will love me again! He will love me again! He will love me again!" Faster and faster she went in circles, faster and faster the world around her flew by. "He will love me again! He will love me again! He will lo-"

But suddenly the girl felt a sharp pain in her hips; a force propelling her backwards. Falling face to the night, Meri stretched her hand upwards. Up to the dark, decorated blanket of blue hue that lay over the city. Her tears returning full blast, she reached out. Reached out for those thousands of stars. She was a star! Oh yes, she too was a star!
If you come across an older post of mine, said with insensitivity or without empathy, I am sorry.
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What is my liiiife?!?

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Location: UK

Rank: Admin

Joined: Tue Feb 27, 2007 11:02 am

Posts: 2504

... whoa. That creates a new standard of sad (Poor Meri, trapped in her own little world :( ) *Gives HH a cookie*

PhoenixAshes, it was a good try, but it lacked something; there wasn't much introducing to it. We don't know who Phoenix really is, only the stuff in your profile lets know about him. But it was still pretty good. :) *Gives PA a cookie*

And Don, while excitement is good, we need to give others the chance to learn. Patience! :D
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I may or may not be here.

Gender: Male

Location: Drinking a mug of hot chocolate

Rank: Ace Attorney

Joined: Thu Nov 29, 2007 11:58 pm

Posts: 4916

I didn't know if you were going to do multiple tutorials and let people decide what ones they wanted to do.
Like this.

Tutorial 1
|
Posts for T1
|
T2
|
Posts for T1 and T2
etc.


That is what I thought you were going to do when you said " put a heading of 'An opening post for an RP about ___', and I should easily be able to spot it. " I was thinking you were going to use that to differentiate what post went to what tutorial at a glance.
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True love is forever.

Gender: Female

Rank: Ace Attorney

Joined: Tue Oct 30, 2007 4:55 am

Posts: 2182

I'll give this a try. I'm always happy to learn. Here goes...

Mia woke up slowly, dimly aware of a buzzing noise in the background. Pulling the pillow over her head to muffle the noise, Mia tried to fall back to sleep but the loud noise persisted and Mia finally gave up on the idea sleeping any longer. As her mind became more alert, she realized the sound was coming from her alarm clock. Her hazel eyes flew open and Mia turned her head to look at the clock which now read ten o'clock.
Jumping out of bed and cussing softly, Mia snatched up the phone with one hand and grabbed a hair brush with the other. As Mia listened to the phone ring, she ran a brush through her long black hair. Frustrated when no one answered and realizing that she was only making herself later, Mia slammed the phone down and ran to get ready. Ten minutes later, Mia finally threw on her coat and dashed out the door. Why today of all days did she have to be late? Already Mia could feel her head starting to throb. It was going to be a long day.
Proud Supporter of Phoenix/Iris, Ron/Dessie, Klavier/Ema, and Apollo/Vera
Fanfics Updated-12/25
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Really? Me too!

Gender: Female

Location: In Snow!

Rank: Desk Jockey

Joined: Fri Dec 14, 2007 7:03 pm

Posts: 81

Okay, I want to try... Can't promise much...

A young woman approached the door to the building. She pushed the long brown hair from her face as she searched her purse for the address. From the back, she had been mistaken for Mia Fey many times. But if you looked at her from the front, it was definitely not Mia. This was Melody, her younger sister. She matched up the addresses. "This is it..." She whispered. Taking a deep breath, Melody knocked on the door with her left hand , which had an engagement ring on it.


How's that?
Creator of Melody Fey/Ash Sangre(Edgy's wife from years past, Defense Attorney) and Denim Daisy(Prosecutor). Mel/Ash is re-engaged to Miles Edgeworth (RP'd by CCCM)!
Thanks GP for Avy!
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What is my liiiife?!?

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Location: UK

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Very good. It explains, intrigues and tells us everything we need to know. Also makes us go 'awww ^_^' with the engagement thing. *gives Melody a Cookie*

Mia, thats also a good post. It has everything that's needed. I have just one tip though, use pronouns more instead of just 'Mia'. It sounds better having some 'she''s in the mix. :) *gives Mia Cookie*

Also, a new Tutorial will be up soon, Guys. I'd like to know what you'd like to learn so I can address it :)
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e × e = e²

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Location: God Less America

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Joined: Wed May 02, 2007 8:17 pm

Posts: 2289

How about giving us an example post we have to reply to?

(12 words)
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I may or may not be here.

Gender: Male

Location: Drinking a mug of hot chocolate

Rank: Ace Attorney

Joined: Thu Nov 29, 2007 11:58 pm

Posts: 4916

We could take the minimum post size example
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and make the next part of the story!
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Really? Me too!

Gender: Female

Location: In Snow!

Rank: Desk Jockey

Joined: Fri Dec 14, 2007 7:03 pm

Posts: 81

Sounds fun! :maya:
Creator of Melody Fey/Ash Sangre(Edgy's wife from years past, Defense Attorney) and Denim Daisy(Prosecutor). Mel/Ash is re-engaged to Miles Edgeworth (RP'd by CCCM)!
Thanks GP for Avy!
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I just want to die

Gender: Male

Location: Fighting the Clone Wars on Coruscant

Rank: Desk Jockey

Joined: Sat Oct 06, 2007 11:45 pm

Posts: 123

I want to see If I could write 100 words in a post so here I go...

Kyle was in his office, reading his paper as always when he heard a knock on his door. "I wonder who that could be?" Said kyle as he walked towards the door. The knocks grew louder and louder with each one. Kyle opened his door and one of those knocks "Knocked" him in the face. "Yeowch!" Kyle yelled out as he rubbing his poor broken nose. "Why did you do that fo-" before he could finish his sentace the other person cut in. "My name is Jack O' Hearts! Mr. Church would you please defend my brother in court!" He said with a sad look on his face. 'wow this will be my first case in years... I have no choice but to agree.' He thought as looked Jack who was panting, a clue that he probably got here in a hurry. "Of course I'll defend him!" Exclaimed Kyle Church.

(150 words xD Hurray)
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I may or may not be here.

Gender: Male

Location: Drinking a mug of hot chocolate

Rank: Ace Attorney

Joined: Thu Nov 29, 2007 11:58 pm

Posts: 4916

Nice work there! Gerk is going to give you a cookie for sure!
:cookie: But heres one from me for going for over 100 words! :gymshoe:
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I just want to die

Gender: Male

Location: Fighting the Clone Wars on Coruscant

Rank: Desk Jockey

Joined: Sat Oct 06, 2007 11:45 pm

Posts: 123

Thanks don :jazzron:
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A fad in a castle

Gender: Female

Location: The Gavelshroom Kingdom

Rank: Ace Attorney

Joined: Wed May 30, 2007 9:55 pm

Posts: 3503

I suppose I'll practice....

****

The sun was seeping down the green meadows and the heights of the hills. Orange hues layered the lands like a soft, silk blanket. Some rabbits were outside of the holes of which they slept in, their warren. It was early summer and the grass were fresh and tasty to nibble on, every once in awhile a doe or a buck would find the odd cowslip or clover - certainly a treat. Many rabbits were out to feed and chat for the last moments of the day. Soon the sky would darken and twinkling dots would flicker and then they would go underground for the night.

Two bucks emerged from one of the warren's holes. The first buck was a rather tall fellow and had black fur that was tangled in a few spots. He was also a rather unusual rabbit too, he had a turf of fur that spiked backgrounds... leading away from the ears. The other buck was just as strange. He was smaller and had a beautiful brown pelt, and had two stalks of hair that hung from his forehead. Often the other rabbits would mistake that he had four ears.

"Come Apollo, everyone's out to silflay. If we're lucky, we can find a nice patch just for us." The black buck told the other, his younger brother.

"Oh Hazel... um... Phoenix, are we to go far? Something has been bugging me lately. The trees... the sky, they are telling me something... something bad."

"Do not worry." Phoenix replied. "It's just your imagination. What could possibly go wrong?"

****

A bit short. Sorry 'bout that. Cookie to anyone who gets the reference in this.
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Story writer and music lover.

Gender: Male

Location: Maryland

Rank: Ace Attorney

Joined: Sat Oct 06, 2007 4:02 am

Posts: 2353

I'll take my hand at this.

Gotta keep my writing skills up, anyway.

---

It was a cold rainy day, which was rare in a Los Angeles fall. Millini walked into the coffee shop, eying the young woman behind the counter. He walked over, pulling out his wallet from his pocket, taking out a ragged ten dollar bill.

"Give me the best in the house." he said, handing the woman his dollar.
"Okay." she responed, taking Millini's money.

Millini turned to the wall, looking at the portrait on the wall. It was a scene of a forest, decorated in the most abstract and vivid of colors. Though a bit eccentric, Millini admired the portrait's unique choice of colors. He looked at his watch, as he turned back to the woman.

"So, what's up with the trip picture on the wall there?" he inquired.
"Oh, it's just something that the owner liked, and bought."
"Does time stop much in this place?" he asked, reaching into his pocket.
"What do you mean?" she wondered.
"Slow day, y'know. No traffic." he explained, running his left hand through his black hair.
"Well, we've had our slow days, but we can be pretty busy when the coffee is just right." she responded with optimism.
"I'm sure you do." he said, as if that were a fictional account.
"Anyway, it seems that your coffee is ready." she stated, as Millini took his coffee.
"Let me tell you: even if this isn't the best, all that matters is that you did your best," he said, sipping his mocha-latte, as he leaves the store, "Anyway, I need to hop. Later."

The bell attached to the door rings, as he takes to his car. The woman smiles deviously, as she hides a container of poison.

"Sweet dreams, Mr. Millini..." she said with her wicked grin.

---

Looks like I need some work. But I guess that's what this topic is here for.
--Millini (Official CR Rock Prince and Gavinism convert.)
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What is my liiiife?!?

Gender: Male

Location: UK

Rank: Admin

Joined: Tue Feb 27, 2007 11:02 am

Posts: 2504

Hey guys, you're all doing great! Don't sell yourselves short, ok; your posts are excellent. *Gives Ryuchi, SuperJB and Millini a :cookie:* I'll be writing the next tutorial thing next monday, but I still aren't sure what you'd like me to talk to you about. :D
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Ace Mobster

Gender: Female

Rank: Desk Jockey

Joined: Fri Feb 01, 2008 4:50 am

Posts: 68

And now, Mafi tries her hand at something she hasn't done in at least a year:

Roleplay.

-----------

She snorted contemptuously over her plate, loudly slurping up another fat noodle in front of her guest. After it had disappeared into her maw she quickly slid her right hand up to her mouth to, in stark contrast to her rather unladylike performance with the fettuccine, daintily pat at her lips to remove any stay globs of spaghetti sauce that might have flown onto her upper lip. With her left hand, she began to twist her fork into her mound of pasta to ready her next bite.
"You?"
She cackled in his face and shoved the fork into her mouth. Even through a mouthful of food, her giggles could be heard throughout the restaurant. "You want more money? No. I don't think so. You haven't even paid me back since last time. Don't kid me with such requests."
The man in front of her flinched and his face betrayed every thought that passed through his head. The Donna slowly deciphered them as she chewed. First, she could tell that he had no idea she was capable of eating so much. Obviously he had never met an Italian woman in his life; petite woman of this race seemed to keep their figure until motherhood (a state of being that she had no desire to ever become burdened until she needed an "heir" to her empire).
Second, he was willing to put his life on the line for this money. He had guts. Unfortunately, he didn't have the brains to back up his bravado.
And third, he was staring at her ring. The gorgeously cut diamond on her left hand she had kept as a memento of when she "made her bones", so to speak. She had made it look like an accident, but there were always going to be those that had their suspicions of what happened. After all, it had seemed rather...odd that the most influential mob boss in the city had been killed a week after getting married to a little ambitious nobody of a girl.
But her lawyers were good. And nothing could be pinned on her so long as no one got in her way. With an entire underground army at her command she knew that wasn't going to be a problem. It had been easy to influence her underlings to stay by her side, despite how unconventional the idea of a woman running a mafia was. With a combination of playing on her buttonmen's greed and stupidity, she had them eating out of the palm of her hand.
Except for this fat sack of waste, who had decided to dig further into her business and pocketbook with another loan she knew he'd never be able to pay back. There was an easy way to solve this problem; all she needed was her magnum, silencer, and the alley behind the restaurant.
She stood with a wicked smile and clapped him on the back.
"Let's take a walk, shall we? We'll discuss this in a time when I'm feeling more generous." A quick flick lit up the cigar she had shoved in her mouth after dinner and as she drew her first puff she only had one thing on her mind:
Where to dump his body afterward?

-------

Christ that was long, but I haven't written in ages, so that felt good. :B
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jubiliciously lovely corpse bride

Gender: Female

Location: Good question!

Rank: Suspect

Joined: Mon Feb 11, 2008 2:42 am

Posts: 32

ok, i'm not sure if i'm doing this right. I can post oc, right? Not ooc. Ok, *sigh* here we go...

------------------------------

The mansion froze that winter night. The snow fell outside, covering the beautiful rose garden she loved so much. Each snowflake replaced the decrepit look of the garden with a refreshing -but cold anyway- new look. Maybe with each horrying thing that the snow covered, each painful memory would be covered too. Sighing, the petite girl unfocused her eyes for a second. She had been watching each snowflake drop to the ground for almost half an hour now. Nothing to do, no one to talk with...
When suddenly, out of nowhere, a scream pierced the air, making the girl turn abruptly.
A strange scent catched the girl's nose: Blood. Scared, she tried to open the door, screaming for help. Just what was happening?

"Brother! Brother!"

By the time the small girl managed to open the door, it was too late. At her young age, she wasn't ready to witness the massacre that was palced in front of her eyes. Corpses everywhere: she recognized some of them. Especially the one laying closest to her.It was like a joke. An horrible joke that someone without heart would only do to such a young girl.
"B-brother..."
The boy had his eyes wide open, his hand stretched out towards the girl's bedroom's door. Right where she was standing. Frozen, she lifted her innocent gaze, only to see him... The one who took and was still taking everything from her.

Such a small, young girl, with no discord in her heart. No one would've espected to see her angry.

Instead, she ran inside again, tearsfalling from her emerald eyes.. She saw the man. She saw who killed them all. But she was afraid. Too afraid to tell anyone. To afraid to even remember the events correctly.
"Who...who did big brother say to call if someone ever was murd...mur..." She couldn't bring herself to say it.
"His name is Wright. Phoenix Wright. Should ever something happen to me or dad, don't hesistate and grab the phone in your room. He'll help us. Trust me"
But it was so long ago...what if...? No, she couldn't be thinking about that right then. Breathless from all her sobbings, she picked the phone and dialed the phone number scribbled in an old, yellowish paper placed not to far from it.

"Please...Mr. Wright...Answer me...i don't want to be alone..."

-----------------------

Poor thing, she doesn't know that Mr. Wright isn't an attorney anymore :larry: Ok, i hope i did ok...? Someone tell me, because its my first :meekins:
-- Lucky 13
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Beautiful sig made by Aijiru
Re: The Practice RP topic (+ Tutorials!)Topic%20Title
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What is my liiiife?!?

Gender: Male

Location: UK

Rank: Admin

Joined: Tue Feb 27, 2007 11:02 am

Posts: 2504

Gosh, you guys are good too! It looks like most of you don't need my help afterall! ^_^ *Gives Mafi and Lucky13 a :cookie:* And now, for a mini tutorial-bite while I write up the main one

Tutorial-bite #1-Thesaurus is not a dinosaur, it's useful!
Sometimes, we need a new word. Actually, writers often need new words; and sometimes when they can't find them they make them up! However, one of the easiest ways of finding words is to use an online thesaurus. You put in the word that you want to replace ('bored' for instance) and it'll give you a list words that mean the same thing, like Listless! (Words with the same meanings are called Synonyms) They often even give you the opposite of the word as well (Called Antonyms). Try using the thesaurus to make your writing more varied! :3
Re: The Practice RP topic (+ Tutorials!)Topic%20Title
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Four is Death

Gender: Male

Location: Wales. That little place next to England.

Rank: Ace Attorney

Joined: Thu Jul 05, 2007 9:14 pm

Posts: 2284

Yes, Gerku. Also, people should use a dictionary =D.

Or *cough* The Collins English Dictionary & Thesaurus.
Re: The Practice RP topic (+ Tutorials!)Topic%20Title
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What is my liiiife?!?

Gender: Male

Location: UK

Rank: Admin

Joined: Tue Feb 27, 2007 11:02 am

Posts: 2504

Actually, most people don't need a dictionary. I rarely see people using a word that's totally wrong :D Also, why buy a thesaurus when you can use thesaurus.com? ^_^ It's freeee!
Re: The Practice RP topic (+ Tutorials!)Topic%20Title
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JECTION!

Gender: Female

Location: U.K

Rank: Desk Jockey

Joined: Tue Jan 01, 2008 7:08 pm

Posts: 75

*shuffles in*
I wonder....
Regarding that rule about the GS4 stuff, does that mean we can't roleplay involving those characters...?
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Re: The Practice RP topic (+ Tutorials!)Topic%20Title
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Gender: None specified

Rank: Ace Attorney

Joined: Thu Nov 15, 2007 2:25 am

Posts: 3539

You can if the RP is marked as having GS4 spoilers.

And please change your avatar, it took almost a minute for this page to load and 1 meg is way over the size limit...
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Re: The Practice RP topic (+ Tutorials!)Topic%20Title
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Never mess with a kid with an agenda

Gender: Male

Rank: Prosecutor

Joined: Thu Feb 21, 2008 5:01 pm

Posts: 676

Hmm, been awhile since I did an opening post for the hack of it, but I've been RP'ing for years, why not polish the skills? If my opinion helps at all, the opening post in an RP is somewhat like the scene that plays before each case in Phoenix Wright, it doesn't tell you everything, but there is enough there to keep you going at it for several hours to see what all is going on. the best RP's I've been in didn't tell all right up front but rather held some hooks and twists to the story, anyway, onto my "for jollies practice opening post"... Be warned, I don't follow all the rules of grammar (Run on sentences be damned) But I try and keep things mostly Legit


====================

It wasn't the first time, no, it wasn't first time it had happened. It was not the first time he smelled the cold metallic smell of freshly spilled blood; not the first time it had covered his hands; Not the first time he's looked into eyes blank with a sense of betrayal. But it was however, the first time he felt like a betrayer, and the first time when he wasn't entirely sure what happened. "No...no...I didn't...I..." he gasped to himself shaking his head in disbelief as scarlet liquid pooled on the floor from the woman in front of him.

He stared at his hands in disgust, how could he? Why would he? After all she'd done for him? After all that, had he really done this? He searched his brain franticly, looking for some shred of reason, some idea as to what he'd done last, but all he could think was about the corpse in front of him, everything else was a blank as shock took control of his mind.

He fell to his knees, shaking, his knife was lodged in her chest, stuck right between two ribs with surgical precision, penetrating down to her heart with it's long blade.

Sirens blared all around him now, echoing into the small living quarters on the 4th floor of the Zeus apartments, there were there for him and he knew it, yet he could not move, his body numb.

He said nothing as they cuffed him and read him his rights. his mind could do nothing but loop the words, "She's dead, I didn't do it, I can't remember." as they pushed him into the petrol car he mumbled softly to himself, "What is the truth...? How can I find it...?"


--------------


I'm not sure if the best or worst little opening here, I know it's not the longest, it was a little short for me actually, but it's after midnight here, anyway, in a "Case" it sets up the Murderer, the Victim, (Who would both be introduced later, I'm weird in that sometimes I don't want to know the character's name until the ball is rolling a little) the murder weapon and location (Well, I'm talking to Wright fans here, we all know how that Murder weapon and location stuff goes here eh? I'm looking at you Turnabout sisters case.) , but it felt good to exercise the old think muscle, if I might give a few pointers to newbies to RP...

1. Let your imagination run things, then if something doesn't fit, you can edit it, but it always flows best if you write what comes through your mind and then take care of the bugs, unless you've been doing it for awhile, then you'll find that you filter out things that are impossible automatically

2. Keep a good handle on where everyone is in a room, might not matter so much for court cases, but say in an scene, Phoenix Wright is running away from a truck and he ducks inside a building to find that the man who wants to kill him (The driver) Is standing inside the building, unless that Murderer happens to be Freddy Krueger or someone else who warps around, that's a contradiction, watch out for those, they are rarely super damaging to the flow of the story. But they can be a real annoyance.

3. Italics are generally acceptable for thoughts (Phoenix Scowled, "There's nothing I can do for him now. He thought as he slammed his hands on the desk) Otherworldly or ghost characters often times take on different text colors or glow's for talking, Bold is good for shouting. but you can find your own thing, or just describe it in text, these are just things that are common and easy to understand

4. Remember that you have a WHOLE BODY to work with as well as an entire environment, every character can move his arms, legs, toes, eyebrows, nostrils...I think you get the picture, there's very little Excuse for a little short post like ("Oh wow, you got me Wright." Jimmy said) when you could have...(Jimmy's face descended into a look of despair as he heard Wright's words, hammering the nails into his coffin for the lies he'd told, Sweat beaded up on his brow and he sighed, defeated, "Wow...you got me Wright..." the defeated man said, his eyes focused intently on a speck on the floor in front of the witness stand.) With the first you get the main point across, but with the second, you get the point across, make it more fun to read, and help give subtle insight into your character all at the same time.

5. God modding, in case you aren't familiar with the term, means obviously controlling another player character's fate without consent from the one controlling the character, most people know this definition, however, it's often also considered God modding if your character "Just knows" Everything without having any prompting to that end. It gets annoying to play with someone who can't be hit at all, or who's playing a bad guy that gets killed, then decides with no prompting that "Haha, you just killed my clone! lol! PWNAGE BEAM! you died I win" if you have a clone double, you have to note it in the story before you can use it as a defense. It's same with traps, if you don't note that you set up a bear trap and then say another player character steps into it, you're just being a pain. Don't God mod.

6. This is a personal note, I used to RP on a site that shall not be named as this isn't the forum for that, but suffice it to say they were a site dedicated to RP, the thing is that they had a love of having epic 2000 word posts with every reply, I've never seen a RP like that make it to the end, just like you can be to short, you can also be too long winded, for most people, if they are faced with a WALL of TEXT they are going to skip on down to the next RP. If you like that style, then fine, get some other people together that like it and have a ball, but remember, in an RP, all characters are moving on the same flow of time, this means that While Edgeworth is shouting "Objection!" Phoenix wright does not have time to pick his nose, balance his checkbook and draw a picture of Edgeworth as a Princess in that time, keep relative time flow in mind.

7. Most of all, remember, you RP for fun, if you're not going to have fun RP'ing, don't RP, also remember, just because a fellow site member has his character steal your character's woman (With the agreement of whoever is controlling that character) does not mean you need to hate that forum member, they are only acting and most likely have nothing against you in the real world. you might be surprised, but I have seen bad blood come up over RP's.


That's all I have for you folks right now, apparently I had a lot to say, hopefully at least a couple people will read it and find it useful, and if you mods have a problem with it, you can take it down, it's only humble suggestion, but if you do, please let me know why alright? Later.
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Sig links to my fanfic. MayaXPhoenix. Romance/humor. Final chapter is up.
Re: The Practice RP topic (+ Tutorials!)Topic%20Title
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Sweet by name, sweet by nature!

Gender: Female

Rank: Suspect

Joined: Mon Feb 18, 2008 12:20 pm

Posts: 22

Thanks for the tips! How's this?

It was dusk in L.A., the time just between night and day where the shadows behind the streetlamps seem to dance and scuttle along the bare brick of the office and apartment blocks. Perhaps a frightening time for a newcomer to be thrown into, though the young woman walking confidently down the street didn't seem to be bothered.

She consulted the piece of paper she was clutching, stopping outside a glossy door with a brass plate above. It read 'Wright & Co. Law Offices'. She took a deep breath, adjusting the hem of her powder blue skirt and brushing back an errant strand of hair. Be professional, Beth she told herself. This Mr Wright isn't some kind of dragon, after he did hire you. And it's not like you're a complete novice. Just don't look back. Beth hoped that this would be a new leaf, where she could forget about all the mistakes of three years ago and begin again. 'I just hope he doesn't remember me.' she said out loud before knocking on the door.

Her next words before the door opened was so faint it could not be heard. I'll have to face him someday though.
'Are you the new defense l;awyer? Ms. Nova?'
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Thanks to IrisWright for the sig!
Beware of little Pearly, she knows more than you guess.... Like the combination to your safe.
Re: The Practice RP topic (+ Tutorials!)Topic%20Title
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Doesn't know how to ride a bike D:

Gender: Female

Location: Where do you live, bub? On Mars?

Rank: Medium-in-training

Joined: Thu Mar 06, 2008 2:29 pm

Posts: 470

Anyone is free to post right? I guess I'll place my RP post here. It's my first roleplay post in n years so I'm sure there's a lot of errors xD; *epicfail*

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I'm embrassed about this RP post. Too much use of ","... Uhuhuhuhuhu...
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Emerald eyes fluttered open to the bright light that filtered through navy blue curtains. It was morning already, nearing afternoon, to be exact. Pink hair scattered on top of soft pillows were visibly poking from beneath sheets, with its thick blankets rhythmically moving up and down, in tune to the woman's breathing. Saori had overslept, but it seemed she was far too dazed to realize it. After forcing her body to sit upright, she glanced to her side, only to notice a digital clock blatantly stating the time for her. 11:57 am, bold green digits matched with small letters stared back at her. It was then that she realized; she was supposed to be in the office about 3 hours ago.

The woman seemed familiar with moving quickly under pressure, seeing as she arrived at her destination, fully dressed and ready to work, in under 15 minutes. Although her lilac business outfit was ironed out carefully, making her look as if she was a professional, her face displayed quite the opposite. She was wearing a worried expression, sincerely apologetic for her tardiness. Not only that but her cheeks were flushed. It looked as if she ran to the office in record breaking speed. As she was clumsily gasping for air, a man in his early 40s glanced at the late comer. There was nothing surprising about seeing the woman late, and it was obvious from how casually the man identified her. Standing up from his desk, a beige suit became fully visible. At his left collar, a golden sheen that could only be produced by an attorney's badge was seen. The man made his way from the very back of the office to the entrance of the rectangular room.

"It seems you woke up again late, am I right Miss Shinjiro?" A rather young voice came from the man. Quite surprising when compared to his age. As he looked down, hazel eyes met emerald. His question was not for intimidation's sake. On the contrary, he merely asked just to start the conversation.

"A-ah... Yes. I'm extremely sorry for the inconvenience once again, Sir." By the end of her sentence, it seemed as if she wished to add something. But then she held back, knowing that it was unnecessary. It would not have helped her in any way. A swift bow followed the apology, hoping it would emphasize the girl's sincerity.

"Miss Shinjiro, please stand up." A mild tone was used and a nervous smile came to her superior's face. He wasn’t sure how to handle the girl’s lack of self-confidence. It seemed she was truly sorry, thus the only thing he could say was, “It’s alright.”
Saori quickly jerked her head upwards, her body slowly followed. She was unsure whether he was pitying her or merely forgiving, but she was thankful for his willingness to overlook her repeated offense.

“I-I’ll do my best today, Sir!” She shouted, enthusiasm quickly returning to her voice. The only thing missing was a salute, and Saori would have been willing to do so if needed. The girl’s awkward action, though full of pep, caused the man to give off a cheerful laugh. “Well then, I’m counting on you. Do your best with the paperwork, Miss Shinjiro.”

The man turned and headed back to his desk, chuckling a bit to himself on the way. Behind him stood the young girl, feeling a bit embarrassed still. It was then that it occurred to her. He mentioned “paperwork”. It was surely something the woman dreaded.

She knew that she was inexperienced, and as sad as it might have been, she couldn't disagree with the notion that she was irresponsible, but there was something inside of her that wanted to prove what she was capable of doing. She knew that she could save someone if she put her all into it. But that meant being given a chance. Sulking to herself, the girl moved to the desk at the far-right of the office. There, a stack of papers stood. Judging from the size, it would take her another late-night cramming session, as she dubbed it endearingly, to finish. Sadly, this would be just like yesterday with a morning resulting like a few minutes ago.

A sigh escaped her lips as she briskly seated herself on the chair behind the polished, wooden desk. As she grabbed a paper from the top of the stack, a plate on top of the desk gleamed as the rays of the sun bounced of the metallic material.

It read, Saori Shinjiro : Defense Attorney "Smile, smile, smile~!"
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Re: The Practice RP topic (+ Tutorials!)Topic%20Title
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Raw Rock Kills

Gender: Male

Location: Objection, Your Honor. Relevance?

Rank: Medium-in-training

Joined: Tue Feb 26, 2008 2:03 am

Posts: 304

J'carmichael was a simple man, enjoying his life for how it was and almost never complained. He had a good job at the button factory. One day, he was pushing buttons with his right hand when his boss came and said "Bob, can I talk to you?" Then led J'carmichael to the corner of the room.
"Sir, it's J'ca-"
"Bob. Listen to me. You have not been working hard enough. If you value your job like I hope you do, you WILL take on more responsibility. Do you understand?" the boss snarled at J'carmichael, trying his best to contain the tears that started to well up in his eyes.
"Yes, sir, I understand." So, J'carmichael went back to his workstation.
Sighing, he started pushing buttons with his left hand.
Then, his life was changed. Forever.

((Good? Yes? I hope so, I haven't RPed in forever.))
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chargin his legalz

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--==My Art==--

Raw rock kills.
Re: The Practice RP topic (+ Tutorials!)Topic%20Title
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Just call me Natty!!

Gender: Female

Location: Blinking and in the sun

Rank: Medium-in-training

Joined: Tue Feb 26, 2008 2:07 am

Posts: 404

Hmm... Probably should have read this before I started RP. Oh well! Can't change the past and can't see the future! I'll give it a try with an idea i've been kicking around...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

On the outskirts of town, there was a building. Many years ago, it was a hotel. Now, it appeared to be desolate.

Appearances can be deceiving.

Within the building, there was a strong power at work. It had been there the whole time; it was just unnoticed. This power was the power to grant what was sought. That power had brought the hotel up, and it brought the hotel down. Greed had before brought droves of people to the hotel. Then the greed wasn't fufilled, and the people stayed away.

Until today, That is.

A woman with purple eyes and wearing tatters walked into the lobby. She touched the counters, and they were clean from the fourty years of dust. Smiling, she touched the broken chairs and they were fixed. She went around the hotel and fixed everything. Finally she went out front and touched the building itself.

Who is the woman Who fixes things with a touch? She is one of the last of the people called Life. Life are few in number and they ran the hotel years ago. They won't return. They are dying far faster then they can reproduce. The woman thought about all of this and smiled again. The Hotel's exterior was repaired and the name of the Hotel appeared...

---------------------

"Hotel Life?" A young woman read aloud. "Huh. That's an odd name." Her long brown hair blew in the wind. She sighed and picked up her bags. Her Sapphire colored eyes sparkled in the light of the setting sun. "Well... I don't see any other hotels near here. And I need a place to stay. This will have to do."

She walked into the lobby which was quite cozy. Everything matched precisely, except for the woman in tatters behind the desk. The woman behind the counter smiled slightly. "Need a room?"

The younger girl nodded. "I, uh, have business in town."

The woman pulled a card and a pen out. "Your name?"

"Lee Zee. 20." Lee pulled out her ID.

The woman shook her head. "Don't need that." She placed the card under the counter. "Right this Way Please..."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Woah. that was much longer than I thought it would be. Well, How is it?
Married to Phoenix_Apollo. Mother of fatalfeline, Game Over and JadeRoach!
Sister to Ben Credable (Thanks for the sprite that I'm now using for an Avy)!
If it makes sense, then EAT IT!!
Indie Wright RP: CLICK!
Re: The Practice RP topic (+ Tutorials!)Topic%20Title
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OBJECTION!!

Gender: Male

Rank: Suspect

Joined: Sat Mar 29, 2008 10:32 pm

Posts: 5

<Self deleted for idiocy>
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