"What the fuck am I supposed to take from this?" Chief Grumby asked, staring at the gun and badge that had just been placed on the desk in front of him.
"
I'm out of the game." Dallas said, poetically as ever.
"What the-?" The portly police chief struggled to stand up and then went over to Dallas, bearing over him. "That's bullshit, you and I know it. You got real talent, kid. You're gonna squander it?"
"
I'm too old for this, Chief."
"Don't gimme that crap!" The Chief growled. "You're gone four years, and I can tell you I haven't laid eyes on another Detective with as much gumption, drive, or skill that you have. You got the eye, kid."
"
I'm not cut out for this anymore." Dallas reiterated. "Working by the book does nothing but let the real criminal masterminds get petty sentences--slaps on the wrist. And working off the book...that's a dangerous line to walk on."
The Chief sat back down, reclining in his chair. "Something changed in you. You're not the Dallas I know."
"No." Dallas agreed. "Something better."
The Chief sighed and grabbed the brandy on his desk, pouring two glasses. He pushed one over to Dallas and he grabbed it, swirling it around.
"I'm not blowing smoke here. You're the best of the best." The Chief laughed. "But...I won't stop you if this is what you want."
It's not what I want. Dallas thought.
But it's the way it has to be.Dallas clinked his glass with the Chief, downing the drink.
*********
"You got any revolvers?
I was always partial to the Colt myself."
"Nah." The gun store employee shook his head. "Fresh out." He pulled out a display of guns on a mat. "The Walther P99 though...can't go wrong with that."
Dallas frowned. He never liked sacrificing reliability.
"I can place an order?" The gun store owner suggested.
"Nah. The P99 is fine." Dallas said, handing him a wad of cash. "Thanks again."
"No problem. Always a pleasure, Dallas."
*******
Dallas was sitting in his car, smoking a cigarette. He was parked a little down the block from the address he had gotten from the P.I. as soon as he got out of the killing game.
Sally stepped out of the apartment. With her...her new boyfriend.
Every time Dallas saw her, he wanted to step out of the car and say something. That was always the plan, but he always ran away from the moment. He...didn't know what to say. He was afraid of what seeing her again could do to him.
After about a year of the same usual routine, he mustered up the courage to take action. He had decided to write a note rather than confront her directly--leave the choice up to her. It read:
Meet me at Hybe Park by the benches. I'll be there this Friday at 7 PM.
-DallasFriday was an awful day for Dallas. He hadn't gotten any sleep the night before, and spent most of the day chainsmoking in an effort to calm his nerves. The day itself was perfect weather, which made him a bit reassured of how romantic the scene could look.
Dallas sat at the bench at 6 PM and waited. A few hours passed. And a few more. Before he knew it, the sun had set and risen again. Sally never showed up.
The first place Dallas stopped after leaving the park was a childhood friend's. Maybe he could get the information he needed there. He pounded his fist against the door.
"Whaddya want?!" The man yelled. It seemed the years hadn't been particularly kind to his friend Bugs. He had put on quite a bit of weight and looked weary beyond his years. "Wait...Dallas?"
"
I need to use your computer, Bugs."
"It's Steve." Bugs huffed. "And what the fuck? You come here after 10 years, still playing that stupid song, and you don't even say hello?"
Dallas just pushed past him and went inside. Thankfully, Bug's laptop was open. He sat down.
"What the hell are you doing?" Bugs growled. "That's my-"
"You're friends with Sally, right?" Dallas said, getting on Bugs' Facebook and typing in her name. "Her feed is private."
"Jesus, Dallas. You're completely obsess-"
Dallas put a finger up, telling him to stop speaking. He scrolled through Sally's feed, processing the information.
2 months ago. She updated her status to...engaged.
Dallas sat back, looking defeated.
"Oh, you didn't know?" Bugs asked. He actually looked less angry now, and more sympathetic. "It surprised me too, y'know. You can ask anybody from school and they'll say they thought the two of ya would be together forever. Never seen a couple like you two."
They only saw the good parts. Dallas thought. He knew more than anyone...the one who pushed Sally away was himself. Their relationship was far from perfect in the year leading up to the killing game. Nothing but constant fights, passive-aggressiveness...it all went back to that one case.
"Thanks, Bugs." Dallas stood up. "Sorry
I just barged in like that. I should've been more considerate."
"Oh, what? Err, it's fine." Bugs frowned. "You want any coffee? You look exhausted."
"No." Dallas said, leaving.
******
It had been 3 months. Dallas hadn't returned to Sally's place. He made no attempt to contact her. He tried therapy, he tried dating but...nothing worked. She would never leave his thoughts. The guilt inside of him, the regrets of his past...they only got worse.
Dallas had finished downing the bottle of Jameson in about 10 minutes. He turned his eyes to the gun he had purchased. He was ready.
Dallas looked at the notes he had written: Kagayaki, Akio, Silas, and Sachiko. He hadn't reached out to them since the killing game ended but figured they deserved to know what had happened.
He wasted no time, knowing it'd be best to get it over with quick. He flipped the safety off of the gun, pressed the barrel against his chin, and fired.
Click.Dallas gasped, the sound of the gun jamming taking him off guard. It was the most shocking feeling he had ever experienced, like he had just died for a moment. His stomach lurched as the world around him spun.
He ran to the bathroom and vomited. Bile getting on his hands and clothes. He retched for a few more minutes, panting all the while.
Instinctively Dallas reached into his breast pocket, pulling out the picture he and Sally had taken as kids. He looked at it often but for some reason, this time felt different.
"
I-I can't." Dallas grumbled. "Not like this."
***
He made his way over to Hybe Park. The rain was pouring, and he could barely see two feet in front of him. He cursed at himself for not thinking to bring an umbrella, but kept walking regardless.
Out in the distance, he could make out a vague silhouette by the benches. Could it really be...?
Dallas reached for the gun in his trenchcoat and dumped it in a nearby sewer drain. He no idea what the probability was that the gun would jam right then. He had no idea how lucky he was to be right here, in this moment.
As Dallas got closer, he saw a woman underneath an umbrella. The rain was so heavy it was barely doing anything, and she was struggling to get a cigarette lit while keeping the umbrella above. He could recognize the blonde hair and freckles from anywhere...it was her.
"Need a light?" Dallas asked, stepping in her view.
Sally looked up, so surprised that she had dropped the umbrella. Her mouth was agape, like she didn't know if what she was seeing was real.
"...Dallas?"
The two of them just stood facing each other, the rain pouring around them. The blares of traffic around them, the rain, the cold...none of it seemed to matter. It's like time had frozen on a single moment.
Sally broke the silence. "Dallas, I'm so-"
"
I'm sorry." Dallas interrupted.
"W-What?"
"I'm sorry." He repeated. "I...I'm the greatest Detective in the world but...I was too stupid to see that you were the most important thing that ever happened to me. I took advantage of you. I didn't treat you right. I...I wasn't someone who deserved you."
Dallas could hear Sally sniff, but wasn't sure whether or not she was crying because of the rain. "D-Dallas....I'm the one who should be apologizing. All these years, I thought you were dead because of me. I felt really guilty but eventually...I let myself forget it. I-I...shouldn't have. I won't ever forget it again."
"I don't want you to feel guilty." Dallas assured, touching his hand on her cheek. "There's already a place in hell for guys like me. I just couldn't bear the thought of not seeing you again."
"I-I'm sorry I didn't come that Friday." Sally said. "I didn't think I could do it. I've come here everyday since, hoping you'd show up again. I...I don't think I was able to bear the thought of not seeing you again either."
Dallas smiled solemnly at that. "I heard you're getting married."
Sally just nodded at that.
"Does he make you happy?"
"Yes. He does."
"Good." Dallas said, genuinely glad. "I love you...I love you so much."
Sally's eyes widened. Dallas knew it might've been too much, but he didn't care. He had to say it.
After a tempered silence, Sally embraced Dallas in a warm kiss. It was feeling of nostalgia, childhood memories, and a new beginning. All the turmoil and anguish from the killing game seemed to vanish in an instant.
"I...I love you too."
"You should go home now." Dallas said, forcing the words out. He wanted to stay with her, but knew that wasn't what was best. What was best for her...was to be far from him. To have a life with somebody who could make her happier than he would.
Sally nodded, sniffing. "Do you want to stay out here? Just for tonight?" She asked. "We have a lot to catch up on."
Dallas grinned, feeling like a child again. "I'd love to."
The two of them sat on the bench, talking into the night. It had been a long time since Dallas felt this warm, this close to home. It had been a while since he felt as prepared as he was to take a step forward. Despite the rain, there was no shortage of stars in the sky.