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Re: Jokes?Topic%20Title
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Happy Maria

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You were too late so I died oh well RIP in Pepsi me

And you got me I'm Penguin Rong

Ayup and the guy with Astigmatism was really rod about it. I wanted to put the dunce cap (or should I say dunce cone) on his head. Guy's binary,but needs to be bifocal more than anything
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A new dawn.

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Unless you live in an Asian desert, I'm afraid I would have to make an international call to get you an ambulance. I don't think the hospital would like that.

I thought you were more like a caterpillar than a penguin. Oh well.

Did you enter a competition or something to put the most puns possible in the least number of words? Because I think we have a runner-up here.

Last edited by DarkAgea on Thu Oct 26, 2017 5:03 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Re: Jokes?Topic%20Title
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Happy Maria

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Yeah I'm in the Sahara that's Asian I think idk I never went to school

And how dare you that's a worm as my avatar not a caterpillar. I know the difference because I am very well educated,tyvm

Ooooh pun contest let's go boiiiiiii

Spoiler:
I can't believe my eyes. How did I blind myself of this opportunity to make sight jokes! I'm (con)vexed,but I need to focus. Better heat up the metal rods and paper cones. You are a pupil,I am the master. You're agnostic? More like astigmatic. How come you haven't (con)caved in yet? I don't see how you're still here. Are view ciliary? Come on then,don't blink now. You know what's real? Me. You know what's not real? A virtual image. Your tone reminds of IRIS,while mine reminds me of Retin(a)z. *wink*

Have you noticed how many puns I've made? Good,because you better tell me how many there are before eyelash at you,brow,about how legally blind you are. Come on,if I can keep Presbyopia on,how can't you?

....phew. I'm squinting while scanning meye post. Quite t-eye-ring,isn't it? Now,admit that I have more dioptre-I mean POWER than you. :basil:

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A new dawn.

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The Sahara is African...
And you surely recognise the irony in your statements. *tips Raymond's hat* Almost tempted to ask for a hug, but I will resist the urge. I will resist it.

Wow. That was really good. *again tips hat* But now...

Spoiler:
Watts that? You wanna play with me - just remember my current warning when it Hertz. After all, I have the capacitance for more power here - I'm rested and charged, and for once, I have a completely positive mindset.

I have an ion everything, and I have noticed it all. You better start chanting Ohm by the time I'm done. I'll spark an ultimate war, and believe me, you'll be shocked by the results. You will have no resistance to my lightning-quick strikes, and the flow will be on my side.

I'm amped up for this, but if this gets too heated, one of us may be put in a cell - hopefully not for battery (a certain shocking prosecutor comes to mind). Just don't switch the topic or put a plug on it and we'll be able to find the answer to who the victor is.

I'm gonna lead this like a conductor, and if you try to pull something stunning (like a certain attorney), I'll just become a shock absorber. I may just be starting out, but I believe I'm well grounded.

By the time this is done, we'll be asking wire we doing this. But for now, let's discharge our words.

... I think it's taking me a lot of time to generate all of this, but we have amp-le amount of time.
Re: Jokes?Topic%20Title
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Happy Maria

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Oh sorry it's European my bad

Quote:
Surely you recognise the irony in your statement

What irony?

Quote:
But now


MY TURN

Spoiler:
I Gant believe you're wasting my time like this. Fey! I've come from many Miles away to see your edge. But it is not worthy. Karma shall not favour you Faraday. But alas,I give up.

CYKE

I shall never stop till Justice is served. But you Nahyuta that,did you not? I'm a Goodman,but you're a Hawthorne in my side. I shall stuff your remains in a Wendy Oldbag and let it Byrne in a Blaise of fury! You heard me,BARNHAM! I mean her. You get it,Wright? Kay. Anyway,things shall get Badd for you. Just Tyrell me,and you shall be a Deid Mann. I ain't Coachen you,but Manny of your brain cells shall explode after Cece-ing this. I'm a Deacon of hope: (<---That's a Colin) that's Mia. Maya sure you that much. I won't Ms.Yew at all. You're making me Yanni. I think it's time you stop and admit defeat,and that I am Debeste one here.

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Last edited by Southern Corn on Tue Mar 21, 2017 8:19 am, edited 1 time in total.
Re: Jokes?Topic%20Title
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Happy Maria

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Double post
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Re: Jokes?Topic%20Title
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A new dawn.

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Quote:
What irony?

If you don't know, I'm not telling you. Though I'm pretty sure you're just acting.

Oh, so we've switched, haven't we? Well, in that case...

Spoiler:
Orly? Yew want Justice to be served? Do Mia Fey-vour and stop thinking you're so Wright - it's only going to be Payne-ful when you realise the truth. And regarding Byrne-ing, I'm a Phoenix, and I'll simply rise from the ashes and attack you like a Godot of War, while my strategy will be on the level of Athena's Roman equivalent. I Apollo-gize if this is too much for you, but no matter how many Miles you run, I'll still be ahead, as fast as a Missile through the Skye.

If you want, we can end this - I'll hold out an Arme to be your Buddy, but only if you have Faith that I'll follow my words. I'm Valant to win this, Beh'leeb Inmee. If you want to continue however, I'm sure this will be a DeLite, even if this is a Rhoda to nowhere. Your confidence is a Mistree to me, considering I'm going to Neil you.

The only question is: are you Mann enough to Swallow your coming defeat, as I play with you like Clay?
Re: Jokes?Topic%20Title
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Happy Maria

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You think I'm a good actor? Well..


Spoiler:
Luke over there,it's your self esteem! And I'm about to make it Byrne Baddly! I'm Sorin over your insults like nothing. Mann oh Mann have I got this. Moe over,ya puppet. You Woodman. You're a mere Ben Trilo Quist,while I am Miles ahead of you- Debeste pun master. Arme yourself,because this bomb is abo to Ted Tonate. Hugh O'Conner,my friend. Not even a Mitrov Stroganov could save you this time. Your Pearl-y Whites are about to be Pearl-y Redds. You think you could defeat me? Orly?

You do seem a bit Shadi to me. Thankfully,I am a Magnifi-cent Mistree. You aren't even half as Mr.Reus. Now,get ready to go out in a Gloria Blaise-

Wait,sir? We're doing Layton Brother puns now?

Orange you persistent,my little coworker.

That's not even a-

Be quiet,you fool! Do you wish for me to Keelan Makepeace with you?

No,sir. I do not wish for you to Chase M. Downes and Diane Makepeace with you.

Good,because that's Justin Lawson.

Anyway,I don't want to be Hershel with you than I already have,so are you willing to give up? Destiny Knox for you,my friend. Respond wisely,and Bray Clegg.

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A new dawn.

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Relying on assistants? How the mighty have fallen...

Spoiler:
Aron't you talking about your own self-esteem here - because that's what's going to Absol-utely be Torchic-ing here like Bagon. Combee-at me if you can; I'll just watch you try to get through my Spiky Shield while I stay Comfey and a-Mew-sed. You're ahead of me? First be a Man, Tyke. You Bidoof more than you can chew.

But if you want to continue playing and lose, then Wynaut.

By the way, I thought this would only Staryu and Starmie? Do you need support to win now? But even then, all of what you keep saying is only Type: Null.

This is making me Oddish-ly Drowzee, and yet, it's Hypno-tic to see how far we can push each other. I think I've been slightly Slaking off, though seeing your confidence, I must tell you to not Unown-ingly Jynx yourself and to Bewear of me - I find it possible to Weedle an Onix-pected victory in the Darkrai of moments, no matter how Farfetch'd it may seem. My words will Seel your Gloom-y fate, like the magic of Abra-Kadabra.

Your Entei-re play is just forcing me to Exceggute you with my words. Even Arceus can't save you here.

And telling me to give up? Ditto to you. After all, there's no Shaymin losing the game.
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Happy Maria

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Spoiler:
Orange you a nutty one. You keep going on about these bananas while I try to Apple-i myself to bitter things,like lemons. You have to be more mellow,and more melon. Grow up from this musk of a world you're living in. You're in custardy,but you don't even know it. If you keep carrot-ing on,I may cashew in all my money just to get you to r-EEL-ize the truth.

And don't you lime,you have assistants back there as well. Almond money has come to you.

Peas out.

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A new dawn.

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I simply don't need assistants, dear SC. I can fight my own battles without them.

Spoiler:
Quote:
Peas out.

Does this mean this is over? If it is, I have to admit this was quite ribbiting.
Re: Jokes?Topic%20Title
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A new dawn.

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If I was wrong, then...

Spoiler:
Toucan play at that game.
Ewe must be kidding me. Hippo-critically telling me to grow when all you spout are irrelephant to the conversation at hand? This is certainly amoosing, but is this owl you can do? If it is, you've cat to be kitten me by playing against my purrfect defence.
And please stop lion as I'm the one winning here. Unless you have a strike of shear hax, but that's near impawsible.
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Happy Maria

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Spoiler:
Haha,'twas indeed a bone of a time. I give it a caNINE out of ten. Nah,I'm (fe)line. I give it 2 Doofs out of Boof. That's almost a hundred.

Wait I was just about to post this now you interrupted I have to fight now to reclaim my glory

Ha,let's address the elephant in the room now. You're quite the silly goose. I'm wolfing this stuff down currently. You're quite the cheetah,coming back for more. Now rhino that I might have temporarily accepted defeat,but I'm toucan that back now. I'm not a coward. This is bull. Comet me,and we shall battle once more! Come now don't chicken out. MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHIPPOPOTAMUS


Alright,back to the usual jokes.

What is the difference of women and men?

wo000

Two friends go to see a stand up routine. The first joke by the comedian is the classic 789 joke. Almost everyone laughs but the one of the friends remains stoic. The second one is the classic chicken who crossed the road joke. Once again,everyone laughs but the one friend. The other one thinks that his friend may be hard to impress. In fact,he seems to not even really interested at this point. The third joke is a very offensive Jew joke,and everyone booes the comedian. Suddenly,the one friend bursts into laughter,and everyone looks at him vehemently. "What's so funny about that?!",asks the friend. The other replied,"I got it! Because 789 sounds like seven ate nine! Ahaha!"
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A new dawn.

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I would have replied yesterday itself, but I went to sleep early.

Spoiler:
Indeed, I had a greight time. Hundred out of what exactly? Because if you're not careful, it could be considered irrational.
You have to fight 'cos you have to reclaim your glory? That's an admission four real that I one, or would if you weren't so in-ten-t on keeping this up.

I'm the silly goose? What are you quacking about?
And now you call me a cheetah? I can't bear the contradictions in your statements. Trash those lies ant bee a bit more clear, will you?

Oh please, deer SC, your defeat's more than temporary. Stop badgering me for a victory - you'll just end up aping me in the end. You're no chicken, I'll admit it, you're just doggedly pursuing a victory you can't attain. Are you herring what I'm saying? You better heed it, before I fox you so much that you'll be left ferreting for a way to stop this. Wren are you going to learn that it's a foaly to continue like this? But if you still want to test me, joeyfully continue. You'll just be cowed.


And yup, back to our regularly scheduled joke session...
...with more headlines:


City Council runs out of time to discuss shorter meetings

Murderer says detective ruined his reputation

Starvation can lead to health hazards

County to pay $250,000 to advertise lack of funds

Cemetery residents making a comeback

Woman falls in hospital, told to call ambulance

Car thief steals another vehicle to make court date

Postman's speed fine got lost... in the post

Police Charge One-Armed Man With Unarmed Robbery

Police Arrest Naked Man With Concealed Weapon

Self-Proclaimed Invisible Man No Show at Court Hearing

Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures

Miners Refuse to Work After Death

Worker Suffers Leg Pain After Crane Drops 800-Pound Ball on His Head

Caskets Found as Workers Demolish Mausoleum

Hospitals Resort to Hiring Doctors
Re: Jokes?Topic%20Title
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Happy Maria

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That must have been one terrible hospital

Spoiler:
Please,every dog has its day,and it's mine now. I'm bring home the bacon,baby! You can't cluck with me no more. It ain't okay to sin(e),yo,but you're doing it so much I might as well go get a tan at the beach or rest at the cot for a sec. I logged on to see this,and I'm quite diss-appointed. Your burns are lacking,so much so that I'm freezing in here. It may be ruff for you,but I think it's clear that my comeback was the epicentre of the whole argument.

Now,it's time for you to heel. You can't woof down any of this. What's pupping? Your self esteem. Your hippocrisy is astounding,rEEly. It was EGGciting,but I think my EGGcellent argument is having you speechless currently. Time to stop...erm,bitching.
Get it? Bitch is a..female dog
DOGGONE IT

I cat believe I messed that up. Either way,time to stop Lion around,and admit defeat. :franny:

What did the Jew say to the German at a bar?
"Want a drink?"
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A new dawn.

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I'm a bit late again... I was busy. Apologies.

Spoiler:
Really, "what's pupping"? Is that the best you could come up with? *smh* If so, I'm sorely disappointed.. And to admit defeat when about to win would be foolish. :no-no:

You think you're the epicentre of this? Well, I'm the focus, from where the waves spread, and you're far weaker than I am. I'm shaking everything up, revealing all the faults in your argument. I'm going to leave you quaking.

Every dog has its day, of course, but remember you are leading a dog's life.

Yes... I do need to heal, watching you cria-s I decimate your mediocre defences which will never be on parr with mine. I'll leave you smolt-ering as I fry you. It's too cold? Well, pup, have ewe heard of an ice burn? I think you need to kill some of the ants in your pants to tone down all of that misplaced enthusiasm. You're acting as if you are the cat that got my tongue, while I just took a small cat nap to recover from my disappointment in your comebacks going to the dogs.

I must admit you're taking the bull by the horns, but this rat race was over long ago - you're just beating a dead horse now.
You're telling me to admit defeat - I'll admit you've lost this quite some time back, and I newt. :youngmia:
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Happy Maria

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Spoiler:
You are quite stagnant,doe,in your disposition. Ewe. So I shall continue to heads with you. I'm wolfing this stuff down,really. You're all bark but no bite. Oh deer oh deer. I'm just falling asleep listening to this. I need some Cammy Meele. Thankfully,blood red beetroot helps me stay awake. There are no lynx in your argument- no flow,no connection. You're like a bull in a China store. Except you cause barely any damage. UNO something! Your bridges are forced. I see very well that you're bluffing,and your trump card,your ace up your sleeve,is a plain joker. I suggest you say Go Fish and leave with your tail between your legs, because that's the CURRect thing for you to do.

Found this one in a magazine and it's genius

Spoiler:
A girl learns about Mother Teresa at her school. After coming back home,she says to her grandmother,"Granny,they should call you Mother Teresa!"

The grandmother is surprised. "Oh really? Why?", she asks,expecting a compliment.

"Because your face is just as wrinkled as her's!"

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A new dawn.

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I'm... somewhat early? Let us continue this!

Spoiler:
"No flow, no connection?" You're certainly the best person to advise me on that. Certainly.

You are making this a pandamonium, while I attempt to stay calm. You've lost even the s-mole-st lynx in your words, while I parrot my advice to your Vasquez self.

Urial-ly? You're clearly going cuckoo with your failure, howling as I bat your barbs aside feline like I've got Magic Guard. I'm not quailing at your plain words, instead I'm laughing at you for being such a pigeon - thinking the outer coat is the inner dog. You've goat to be squidding me - you can't even stay on one topic now! What is this - kangaroo-jumping practice? This may bug you, but I play with a different hand than you, and keep whaling if you want, but my rules are different. If you're squirrelling for a reaction from me, you better stop before you embarrass yourself, pig time.

The straightforward minds of children are amazing.


A good one I found while looking for something:

Spoiler:
A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see the bed nicely made up and everything neat and tidy.

Then he saw an envelope propped up prominently on the pillow. It was addressed, "Dad". With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the letter with trembling hands:


Dear Dad,

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with you and Mom.

I've been finding real passion with Joan and she is so nice. I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercings, tattoos, her tight motorcycle clothes and because she is so much older than I am but it's not only the passion, Dad, she's pregnant.

Joan says that we are going to be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood, enough for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children.

Joan has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone. We'll be growing it and trading it with the other people in the commune for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want.

In the meantime, we'll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Joan can get better; she sure deserves it!

Don't worry Dad, I'm 15 years old now and I know how to take care of myself. Someday, I'm sure we'll be back to visit so you can get to know your grandchildren.

Your son, Chad

P.S. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Tommy's house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the report card that's in my desk drawer.
I love you! Call when it is safe for me to come home!
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Happy Maria

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Incredible

I'm just going to link to Who's on First. Speaks for itself.

Spoiler:
O rly? You think you can make me bow down to you. NARROW chance I'm going to do that. You should be a Paul Atishon considering how much you're lion. Either way,you still can't trump me. You think I'm cornered,but I'll keep pressing in nevertheless. I'm Casting Magic,baby, and no spell breaker can get me. Face it,you're caught. Caught between a rock and a hard place. You need to be boulder and stop taking things for granite. Of quartz,I'm gold to crush and grind you. I'm rocking this right now,and don't worry,I ain't stoned. But I have found a goldmine of puns just now,and I doubt your sedimentary puns and pebbles shall break my bones.
-SC
Or should I say
STONE CRUSHER

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A new dawn.

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I hope you don't think I ran away. It was just a very busy day for me yesterday, and I went half of it without internet (and the other half I was out). But I'm back to wage war!

Yeah, I've seen the Who's on First one. Hilarious does not cover it.

Spoiler:
Now, it's my tern. And I wanna tell you I'm Unbeatable, no matter how much Unwavering Emotions you have to win. I was Born to Be a Winner, and your victory is just a Distant Image... The Bitter Taste of Truth hurts, doesn't it? You're Never-ending Trouble, you know, with your Joking Motive to win. Luke Atmey and Confess the Truth, do I seem in any way fazed by your constant lies?

O-pal, Agate to defeat lies in front of you, believe me. You spinel-ot of tales for sure, and it's clear your good taste is starting to erode. Albite you're getting better, leaving no stone unturned as you try various assaults on me, you're still not good enough to escape beryl and actually win this. You've hit rock bottom. It was for the crater good I was advising you, but I'll Kyanit(e), because you require some shaking to see the truth. You cl-amber trying to corner me, but the miracle never happen. Gneiss try, but you're cornered.


(I have to admit, this is the first time I'm having a pun contest with anyone - or making so many puns - and I'm enjoying it.) :edgey:
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Happy Maria

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Indeed it is.
Spoiler:
Gneiss puns you got there. Though I do think you sed(imentary) go and dig some better ones up. I'm undergoing metamorphosis,and I'm heating up. I may blow my top,so you'd better lava me al-stone. You don't even have a silver of wit up your sleeve. You probably don't bauxite well. That's fine,neither do eye (of the tiger). Come on o-pal,it's to(paz)o late for YouNow. Unless you'll Bing better puns,I'm afraid I'll have to re-evaluate my opinion of you being boulder than me. It's a rocky road up ahead for you,with some Rolling Stones. Now bury those puns back where they came from,stoner.

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A new dawn.

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I'm ready to rock and roll! (... Was that a bit premature?) :oops:

Spoiler:
Stop actin'ol(ite) great, will ya? You try to crush me to soil, while Iris-k my brain cells debating with you. I won't brook(ite) any more of this. Are you suffering that much aftershock from me that you can't even form proper puns, instead using ones that should be fossilised by now? Well, that's a better thing to chalk it up to than your lack of skills. Oh, you're heating up, but the core of your argument is melting into nothing, while I stay solid and igneous. It'll take aeons for you to even make a crack on my crust, let alone fault me.

You're erratic, you know, but it doesn't matter - I'm not going to fold against you. Gah(b)bro, I wonder when you're going to find better things to fracture me with. I am (I)sotope-ing this now, and all your heat won't do a thing when I'm crystallising myself from magma itself.

Anyway, just admit your loesse; that's the best thing to do. If you think you can actually be a Turnabout Winner, you've got rocks in your head.
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Happy Maria

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-5 points for prematurity.
Spoiler:
Pft,you're just a pawn in the games of an organisation near you. You may need to go on Hollerday to prevent their evil Melody-ous Rimes from reaching you. Rook,they are quite kingly,so you may need help. Mayhaps you can bail out and call 4 help,m8. It's 2 dangerous 4 u,4 1. Not even 3 3s can stop them. I advise that YOU RESEARCH IT SHEEP PEOPLE SHEEPLE THE GOVERNMENT IS REPTILES.

THIS IS A CALL FOR HELP.

THIS IS A CALL FOR HELP.

THIS IS A CA

EXCUSE ME,DARKAGEA,FOR MY STRANGE BEHAVIOUR. I WAS NOT THINKING STRAIGHT. ANYWAY,BACK TO OUR USELESS PUN BATTLE. HA HA. 7 8 9. ROFLOLMFAO,AM I RIGHT? I AM LUKE-ING FORWARD TO SHEEP WHAT YOU HAVE TO THROW BACK ATMEY. AHAHAH.

-SOUTHERN CORNIUS THE SECOND JR.

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A new dawn.

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You can't minus points for prematurity. We need an actual, neutral judge (or jury) for that.
In the words of Kristoph, "Ignoring the fact that he would have to recluse himself due to personal involvement in the case, he's not even fit to judge a chilli cook off!"

Spoiler:
... Southern Corn(ius), I think we can continue this once you become more coherent. As it is, I wondering what the hell is going on and whether I need to call for reinforcements - mainly psychological, because I'll need to learn exactly what's up here.

Why are you changing topics faster than Edgeworth changes autopsy reports? Also, in the games of an organisation near to me? How much vague can you get? How can they be near me when I'm near isolated from most major hubs?

All I have to throw back to you is, "If I am just a pawn to them, then I'll just cross sides and become a queen. Queens are always stronger than Kings, and unless they're in a castle, I'll defeat them. There is no grey in this match of black and white, and since they are black, I'm white. And I have the first move. In case they are too much, then I'll just have to survive putting them in stalemate. Rook, SC, as a queen, I'm not defenceless and I appreciate your knightly valour in warning me, but I can get through them."

I kame here to see a good argument from you, but your Edge is not Worthy. Please brush up, and perhaps Karma will favour your efforts.
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Happy Maria

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Spoiler:
HAHAH. YOU ARE MISTAKEN. MY PUNS ARE THE FRUITIEST. YOU ARE JUST PAIL OLD NUTTY. YOU NEED TO NOT COCONUT ON A VACATION,BUT YOU NEED TO SEE THERAP(EAR)IST. HAHA. ELSE,YOU MIGHT BE PLACED IN CUSTARDY. I KNOW NOT WHAT I WAS SAYING EARLIER,BUT THERE IS NO ORGANIZATION BEHIND ANYTHING. I WAS JUST GOING BANANAS. ORANGE YOU SATISFIED NOW,DARKAGEA? DO YOU CARROT TO COME UP WITH A WATERMELON? ELSE,I MAY BE FORCED TO ACCEPT THAT YOU ARE A MUSK (MELON) OF YOUR FORMER SELF. I CORN'T WAIT FOR YOU TO REAP WHAT YOU SOW. HAHA.

-SOUTHERN CORNIUS THE SECOND JR.

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A new dawn.

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I'm afraid this contest has electrified all your centres of common sense and coherency.
Paging Talia Maurva and team to do something with their magic. If you can't collect your thoughts and speak calmly, Southern Corn, I believe it's clear who has won this contest. Shouting will not help you get across your points more clearly.

But regarding your words...

Spoiler:
You're just Grubbin' for puns now, aren't you? You're strained now, and your shield is breaking under the pressure, creating a wide rift.

Your words lack both accuracy and acid, and I'll give you anode of appreciation for your work so far, but now it's broken down to atoms and scattering in the winds like it's been winnowed. You've tried alkynes of attacks, but they haven't worked, and now many of the good ones Argon. Yield to me, and I won't vaporise you. I've tor(r)n through all of your arguments, from first to last, and though I would warn you to proceed with ca(u)tion, it's clear you're not going to listen. Why am I even triene?

Also, no, I'm not satisfied.


Last edited by DarkAgea on Mon May 29, 2017 2:05 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Re: Jokes?Topic%20Title
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Happy Maria

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Spoiler:
HAHA. COME ON NOW,I AM NOT SHOUTING. MY...CAPS LOCK BUTTON IS BROKEN,IS ALL.

EITHER WAY,YOU MUST BE MORE ELECTRIFIED IN YOUR APPROACH. YOUR PUNS BORE ME SO MUCH I FORGOT WATT ON EARTH(ING) YOU WERE EVEN TALKING ABOUT. YOU DO NOT NEED TO BE SO (ELECTRO)NEGATIVE ABOUT THINGS. BUT YOU NEED TO RE IRON THIS VICTORY. HAHA. I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU HAVE THE GALLIUM TO SUGGEST THAT I HAVE BECOME MAD AND MY SENSES ARGON. YET I KNOW NOT HOW TO CURIUM YOU. MAYHAPS,HAVE A STRAW-BERYLLIUM? YOU ARE ON A RHODIUM TO NOWHERE. I PRAY IN THE NAME OF MERCURY THAT YOU WILL COME TO YOUR SENSES SOME DAY. PLEASE DO,AS I AM CURRENTLY BORON.

-SOUTHERN CORNIUS THE SECOND JR.

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A new dawn.

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I suppose my punctuality is now countered by my lateness. I have no excuse, so apologies.

Spoiler:
Is it broken due to Caps-Lock Abuse? Because then you'd totally deserve it.

Your puns of vacuum are currently at absolute zero, lacking any coherence - I'm withstanding this like I'm titanium. If I had a nickel for every time you made such immemorable statements, I'd have enough to localise AAI2.

You took the lead in this, but now I'm overtaking you. Though you tourque a lot, what Means do you have to win this? None. All this time, I was phasing this out and now, I know enough to cause a lot of Hert(z) with my iron-clad words. Any ground you had is slowly dissolving, as you stick your head in the clouds with your belief that I'm on a Rhodium to nowhere. I'm dyne to end this; there's no use of you thinking you can crest this, when that kind of luck only comes once in a cobalt moon.

Oh, and no need to try and curium me. I just needed some time to helium from your absurdness.


Last edited by DarkAgea on Tue Mar 28, 2017 4:47 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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Happy Maria

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Spoiler:
HA HA HA. YOU WI WAIT IS THAT AAAGHsg

Sorry about that. It was the organisation I was talking about. I killed them though

Anyway,I can hear you struggling to come up with better pun as you Lyle on the floor. It gives me Schaden Freude. How Perry Docks-ical that you're still kicking. You're a Hawthorne in my side,but a very minor one. You're barking up the wrong tree,pal. Either way,I can't Beh'leeb that this is still going. We've Overtaken the jokes thread and have kept Pressing On with it. But I think you're Lying Coldly if you say you can survive my puns. You've been Cornered,and Caught. I'm Casting Magic,baby. Come on,I'm just Wanting to Find the Truth. Coconut you sea Datz? Either way,this message should still leave you helpless. Time to surrender.

-Southern Corn the Third Sr.

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A new dawn.

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Then I hope nobody minds we're conducting this contest here. Plus, by my calculations, we have eleven (not counting my current one) more posts to go before we overtake this page.

Spoiler:
Now you're going with fangames? How the mighty has fallen...

I'm Struggling to come up with better puns? I suppose your foolish Anticipation of my defeat is making you see this situation through highly (rose-)Tinted Lens, or perhaps the Pressure is just too much for you. I have Adaptability to any situation you create, and I am Soundproof to your Cacophony as well. You sure are Competitive, but that's not enough to delay your Corrosion. You may be Casting Magic, but I'm Merciless, destroying that with Aura Break. I have the Inner Focus and Serene Grace you can only dream of. Get ready to watch the path to your defeat Illuminate, as my Victory Star is burning bright now.

Are you trying to be Defiant to your destiny, or are you just so Unaware of it?


BTW, what happened to the other Seniors and Juniors?

Last edited by DarkAgea on Sun Mar 26, 2017 6:20 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Happy Maria

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Spoiler:
Haha,I don't even get those puns! There's Snow way I would've,but either way,you're in for a big Fall. Meanwhile,I'm Spring-ing up! My puns are puntastic,yours are unpunny. Give up or grieve,m8. Else there's no Hope 4 u. I'm the alpha,you're the omega. Let's face it,you cheeky fool. You better chin up,cos I'm gonna chop up all the puns your tongue comes up with!

And what do you mean what happened to the other seniors and juniors?

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A new dawn.

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You don't get them? I think it's time for you to do some brushing up on a very famous franchise...

Spoiler:
:think: Oh, so you think. But my line of punning is perfect. The question is weather you can brave it, as this is going to be a breeze. Your winning strike won't be mist, because it wasn't even present in the first place. You couldn't hail anything on me even if you tried, so don't think your threats are actually going to rays some concern from me.
You're just chasing rainbows at this point, SC.


The other seniors and juniors as in, the Second and First Jr., and the First and Second Sr.
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Happy Maria

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Oh,them? They're dead,duh

Spoiler:
Ach,is this the best you can do,Mann? I'm the ying over here. You're the yang of course. We need to Hemlock you up for your unpunny funs. You're too fullerene of yore- shelf. I cannot Warren this Clive of behaviour,I'm afraid. Either do better or do nothing,Mango.

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A new dawn.

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When and how did they die?

Spoiler:
Both yin and yang are necessary for balance.

Holly gods, have you bean trying to find better puns? Because if so, I'll apple-y tell you that they are still alder than fossils. I can't find it in me to carrot all about what you say, instead I'll need some coffee to get through this. You said once you wanted to go get a tan at the beech - I think you should spend that time finding stuff that don't blow away like ash as they fall from your tulips. How do you have the gall of the earth to be so hypocritical? You're ch-ivy-ing me to quit this, but from your side, this is turning into a hell(e)bore. If you can ap-pear to be better, then it's time you w-oak and did it.

Forget-me-not,
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Happy Maria

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When and how did your ancestors die? Same way. I'd be surprised if they were still alive honestly

Spoiler:
Yawn,I couldn't even reed through that one,sugar. I feel like sine-ing out,but I cane-not do that. Wood you please make that more integer-esting? I'm estimating that you don't have much left. Of course,I can tell. Your posts are slowly transforming into tangents. And I am your cotagent,your reciprocal. We seem to be equal opposites-a paradox,an oxymoron- but one that exists anyway. Either way,you can't Trump me. Just the thought of it is Hillary-ious. Yeah,not so whole now,are you? I'm quite glad this comes to me naturally.

-Yo so like I had a really cool joke here. So like what's the difference between a modicum and a degree? Give me your guess and I'll give you the correct answer tomorrow lololol :karma: :karma: :karma: im 6 bye

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A new dawn.

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Apologies for the lateness. Again. *sighs* My net loves acting up and shutting down every single time I get to use it. Also, just a warning, I won't be able to post like this by April.

But I remember talking to the Second Junior just a few posts ago. And how can Juniors be a Senior's ancestors?

Now to the actual stuff:

Spoiler:
And we now move to one of the more cardinal topics used. But still your well-done puns and the length of this contest is inversely proportional, SC. You're just acting irrational at this point, shifting your bases so fast. I admit I have a tendency to go off on tangents, but I try my best to stick to my algorithm.

Any analysis of me you have is an error; this is an axiom. We may be equal opposites and yet we are different - I am the unknown 'x' in the algebra you perform, and you have no identity for me. I can't Trump you? Victory is a composite of many things, SC, and unless you have factored for all the variables, you have no proof for your words. So I ask you, y do you knot stop this when you must know that your Fate Smeared by Tricks and Gimmicks still will not change?


And about your question: is the difference that degrees are hotter than modicums?

... Sorry.
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Happy Maria

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That was the organisation who got my name wrong.

Spoiler:
Pfft,and still you persist somehow. Though it is fitting that you won't be able to post like this by April,since you are quite the April Fool. I'll just be marching through then with the May flowers. It's June late to back down now though,so give it your Debeste. Decembers of your flame are starting to go out too,and soon there shall be Novembers left. My burns are hotter than your puns right now,admit it. Why did July,anyway? Mayhaps because you are weakening? Haha,face it,your days,months,and years are numbered,and you can't do a thing about it,can ye?

-What's the difference between a modicum and a degree,you ask?
Not an iota!

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A new dawn.

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So that organisation decided to engage in the pun contest as well?

Spoiler:
First of all, I would like to correct your misconception. It's not because I tire of your foolishness :franny: (though I certainly should be), but because of reality. As in, my real life starts to interfere with all of it (which you will understand if you have one as well). Now that that's done:

May I suggest you March your way out of this before it gets any worse? Otherwise we'll be here till April turns to May... and this has long passed its prime. Nov(rem)ember that I am bisecting this - seeing you turn tensor and tensor while going down a slope as you continue. We were on a plane - I had given up any advantage I had - and yet you find it difficult to get the upper hand, and you won't any time soon if this is your median. Perhaps you want a pi for effort?

Now the denominator of this is, there's no way to win. Do you need a rem(a)inder that multiples of zero remain zero?


Good one.
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Happy Maria

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Dunno their motives
Spoiler:
Ha,is that the best you've got? Well,Xcuse me for Xploiting my Xponentially Xtreme X...puns on you! Don't Xaggerate,you ain't winning this yet,bud. Mark my words,X marks the spot....for the finishing blow.

....
-ssc

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A new dawn.

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I don't know whether I should feel honoured or not.

Spoiler:
A repeated letter does not a victory make; I'm giving you an E for that. B a bit more creative, will ya? C, this is exactly the reason I say I'm going to win. G, I really wonder where all your wit's gone. When you get better, come tell me, K? Till then, I'll be having a cup of T, waiting for U.

Sincerely a J (without the foolish/impertinent part),
DarkAgea
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