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Unexpected Turnabout (Hiatus broke! Last updated 4/19/09!)Topic%20Title
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An Attorney that's NOT short

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I'm going to use spoiler tags so people into the story won't have to scroll past individual chapters
Title: Unexpected Turnabout
Author: EdElricNeko
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Mystery
Status: (Not Complete)
Pairing: (None)
Summary: Franziska von Karma is arrested on the suspicion of murder, While Phoenix and Maya are not suprised they go to the Detention Center to ask to help her. Hillarity ensues at some points and at some other points it is merely but a drama.

Intro
Spoiler:
Franziska rushed for the phone. She breathed very heavily as she picked it up. There was the sound of a gunshot and a scream. There lay a man dead on the floor, a whip crack cut through the eery and terrified silence until it all too suddenly returned. A trickle of blood dripped down Franziska's hand as she dropped the phone holding her hand with the other. The phone only flashed a "9" by the time she had dropped it. All too soon her vision became blurry, She dropped to the floor. When she woke, the police were inside, there was tape around the shape of a body not too far from where she lay. Franziska's sight started to return and she looked up. Detective Gumshoe walked over to her. "Great" Franziska thought "With all the police here this can be cleared up". But to her suprise all that Gumshoe did was cuff her. "H-Hey! What are you doing!?" She demanded to know the awnser. "Sorry sir.." Gumshoe said with a sigh "But you're going to have to come downtown for questioning". Franziska hadn't felt so downtrodden since Her flight from the country nearly two years before.


Chapter 1 - Another day at Wright and Co. Law Offices.

Spoiler:
Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney lay back in his chair drinking some luke warm tea. With Maya and Pearl playing at the park today he had time to tidy up the office without disruption. He began to think that the day would last this way for hours, Until the door slammed open. Maya entered looking around until she saw Phoenix sitting in his chair, Pearl followed shortly after mimicking Maya's every move until she got to the desk where she made a parking position right next to her. They both stared at Phoenix until he broke the silence, "What is it you guys?". Pearl began hesitantly to speak but Maya touched her shoulder and as Pearl looked into her eyes Maya closed them and just merely wagged her finger at the confused Pearl as if to tell her no. Pearl looked back at Phoenix as did Maya, "Is it another Steel Samurai Convention?" He said with a sigh. Maya recoiled "What the-!? No Nick! Those are in November remember!?". Phoenix's right shoulder sleeve went off to the side "Then what is it then?" he said. Maya and Pearl looked at eachother and nodded once as they turned back around. "Ms. Von Karma was arrested on the suspicion of murder." Phoenix bit his tounge to keep from laughing, "Doesn't she look the type to do that sort of thing in the first place?" His laugh was slowly trying to sneak out. Pearl shook her head "Nope! Mr. Nick! She had a whip mark on her hand and the whip wasn't on her anywhere!" Phoenix then started to have suspicion. He put on his trusty Attorney's Badge and got his Court Record ready "Let's get going Maya, Pearls." "Where are we going?" They said together. Phoenix cracked a faint grin, "Where else? The Detention Center". Maya and Pearl nodded and they began out the office door.

Chapter 2 - At the Detention Center
Spoiler:
Phoenix, Maya, and Pearl hopped off Phoenix's bike and proceeded into the Detention Center to visit Franziska's cubicle. Phoenix saw the lost souls of criminals behind countless cubicles, The seats infront of them where of course empty. Phoenix saw Franziska sitting looking down at her lap. He went over and sat in the chair and knocked on her window, She looked up as Maya and Pearl got on his opposite sides to see the shattered Ms. Von Karma. "What are you doing here? Phoenix Wright you fool." Phoenix huffed, Franziska's favorite word was the first thing she called him when they met up with eachother and will always be in Phoenix's thoughts. "We came here to see if you wanted our help" Phoenix said through the small phone. Franziska recoiled "Not in a million years Phoenix Wright, I would surely be hung from the gallows should I have a lawyer like you to defend me" She huffed. An idea crossed his mind, still holding the phone he said "Come on Maya, Pearls, She doesn't want our help" and he started to walk away. Franziska not knowing the plan banged on the window trying to get them to come back. Phoenix turned his head and grinned walking back to the window, He picked up the phone. "So you do want our help?" He said with a truimphant look on his face. "No, I just want you to get me out of this mess so my reputation won't be shattered." she said stubbornley. Phoenix slid his card under the glass and Franziska swiped it and read it all quick. She began to write on the back of it. She slid it back under and Phoenix read it, It was an adress. "Who's is this?" he said. Franziska put a palm to her face "IT'S MINE YOU FOOLISHLY FOOLISH FOOL THAT FROLICS IN HIS OWN FOOLISH WORLD OF FOOLISH FOOLISHNESS! THAT'S WHERE IT HAPPENED!". Phoenix put down the phone, and held his ear for a second. He picked it back up. "R-Right" he said stuttering. Franziska crossed her arms, "Well~? Go!" "R-Right!" Phoenix grabbed Maya and Pearl by the shoulders and raced outside to his bike.


Chapter 3 - The Dream
Spoiler:
Phoenix hopped on the bike, no sooner to Maya and Pearl who had a hard time keeping up (due to him running so fast from the detention center door). But as soon as they caught up Phoenix started driving with them holding on tight to the back seat. A cry filled the air "WAIT!~". It was Maya. Phoenix looked behind "What is it?" he said. Maya pointed with all her might to the right curb beside them. "A Burger Place!" she drooled with glee as Phoenix sweat with embarrasment. "Be back soon we don't have much time after all". "Got it!" Maya said holding Pearl's hand and rushing madly to the entrance. Phoenix began to doze. It was a long doze, filled with clicking and clocking and periods of time would go on, years, in a matter of minutes. Until finally, He drifted off. Phoenix awoke to not only be off the bike, but in a classroom. His hands trembled infront of him on his desk. As he looked more into it, His hands seemed to be alot smaller than usual. He looked infront of the desk, Countless kids had desks lined up on opposite sides of the room. They were shouting "Boo!" throwing things at him. A few said "Guilty! He's Guilty without a doubt!". There was no mistake now, Phoenix knew where, and when he was. The teacher standing behind the podium, "Phoenix, Don't lie to us, Just admit your guilt and we'll forgive you. "No way!" Said one of the children, "I'm not letting YOU play or sit with me at Lunchtime ever, again!". He felt his face, It was moist with the tears that run down his cheek. But just when he thought it was all over, a small noise, It became louder and louder until suddenly it rang so familiarly in his ears.
"OBJECTION!".
It was his friend Miles Edgeworth. And when he got a good look, he began to fade. Phoenix fell into the long dark years. A face, He could see the blurr of it, Feel it's presence. He reached and reached to the extent of his arm, but yet could not reach the distant face swept away by the darkness. And suddenly, He woke. His hands on the handlebars of the bike. Maya nudged his shoulder "ck"... Hmm? What had she said? "ick!~" It became more clear, More or less. "NIIICK!~". The familiar esque calling became clear that the dream was over. His hazy eyes half opened, notioned to Maya and Pearl to get back on. He pulled the note from Franziska out of his pocket, and for the first time in a long time, Began to drive slowly and stare at the scenery for what it was.


Chapter 4 - Where it All Went Down.
Spoiler:
Phoenix, Maya, and Pearl after a long drive had finally approached the door of the Von Karma household (or atleast Franziska's that she kept in America). It was honestly a stone lion at the sides of the door kind of house, With a huge building block. Although no fence, Just a driveway like a normal square of the neighboorhood, And what a neighboorhood to admire it, Phoenix really questioned the Von Karma's policy of perfection now. There were alot of police cars but no police inside. It appeared to Phoenix that the boys were down across the street getting coffee and chatting about the investigation plans. So with the police away he decided to look around the scene. Just then as Phoenix walked through the doorway into the kitchen..He saw a figure..Long hair ended with jagged spike at the tip. (Not Apollo XD) "Hey!" He looked seriously into the eye of the intruder of which he could not see clearly. "Ugh!-" The figure said as he jumped out the window space and ran. Phoenix, who was still drowsy, felt too helpless to chase, but instead to investigate the area that the mysterious man had left. He found something, Something it looked like the killer had come back for...A Pistol...With fresh prints. He looked on the dresser and saw a folder. He identified it as the Autopsy and put it under his arm. He ushered to Maya and Pearl, They were going home to get rest.. They had a court date tommorow.


Chapter 5 - Trial Time
Spoiler:
Phoenix arose from sleep. The clock flashed as it rung in his ears "5:00 AM". He had to get up early, he poured himself a bowl of cereal as Maya and Pearl started to walk in. Once they were all done, Phoenix, Maya, And Pearl went to their rooms to dress. Phoenix put on his badge, tie and suit, and fixed his naturally spikey hair. Maya put on her Medium clothes and put her hair in the natural bun at the top as it had always been known. And Pearl shaped her hair like a pretzel with her medium clothes already on.
They hopped on Phoenix's bike and not too long after arrived at the courthouse. Phoenix did not know the prosecutor for the day. They entered into the defendant's lobby as Franziska stood waiting, impatiently tapping her foot, crossing her arms, and frowning. Only 30 minutes had gone by and Franziska was flustered by their arrival time. Phoenix sighed and prepared for a mouthful of "Foolish fool"'s. But instead only received a sentence forcefully whispered in his ear. Franziska grabbed his shoulder sleave and did the honors. "You better win or when I'm released I will hunt you down no matter how far away you move Mr. Phoenix Wright". Phoenix sheepishly tried to attempt a smile as his obvious frightenedness was showing. The bailiff ushered them to the court room for the start of the trial. Phoenix walked in and casually looked over to the prosecutor's bench as Franziska sat down in the defendant's chair.
Miles Edgeworth was sitting at the bench. He had a big file of evidence about him, And all Phoenix had was a weapon and an autopsy. The gavel of the judge came down. "Please be seated" The familiar judge said to all, "We are here for the trial of Franziska Von Karma". Phoenix rose trying to look confident in his small stack of evidence. "The Defense is ready Your Honor". He said firm. Miles Edgeworth too rose with a real confident look in his eyes, "The Prosecution as well." The Judge nodded, "Well Mr. Edgeworth would you like to make your opening statement?" Edgeworth cleared his throat, "The prosecution intends today to prove Ms. Franziska Von Karma Guilty of the murder of businessman Kory Jaqueline." The Judge nodded once more as Phoenix sweat, Franziska glaring in his eye. Edgeworth rose again "I would like to call my first witness.." The Judge signalled to go ahead, "The Prosecution calls Detective Gumshoe to the stand". Gumshoe sheepishly went to the stand. "Ahem...". Edgeworth looked at him "Please state your name and profession." Gumshoe looked grim, he'd have to testify against Franziska after all. "My name's Dick Gumshoe pal, I work at the local prectinct as a Homicide Detective." The Judge turned his head to Gumshoe "The witness may begin testimony..." He then turned to face Phoenix "And the Defense may begin it's Cross Examination." The Defense and the prosecution were listening, The battle of the courtroom had begun again.


Chapter 6-Gumshoe's Account
Spoiler:
Gumshoe cleared his throat and looked around for any listeners. He shyly reared his head and neck back into position and started to talk. "The Murder took place in the defendant's home. The victim had recieved a letter to meet the defendant there. I remember pal, We got the call at about 6:30 ish."
"HOLD IT!" Phoenix shouted. "Detective Gumshoe, How far from the time of death was this?" Gumshoe sighed and scratched his head "It was about ten minutes after pal." Phoenix embarrasedly bent his neck over "of course.." he thought. The Judge shook his head, "Please continue Detective". "When we arrived at the scene we found the victim shot up at the living room door and the defendant was unconcious near the telephone." Phoenix shook his head, "Detective, Was any number dialed on that phone?" Detective Gumshoe looked puzzled, "Yeah pal, a single 9". Phoenix chuckled "Well then.." he said "I have an OBJECTION!" The thunder of Phoenix's voice shook the court, The contradiction was right there.

Chapter 7 - Unexpected Turnaround.
Spoiler:
Yes! Phoenix thought, I have this one in the bag! "Detective Gumshoe, Who's fingerprints where on that phone?" Gumshoe scratched "Well pal, Only the victim's." Phoenix chuckled again "Obviously the defendant was being attacked, and tried to call the police! Or does anyone else's number start with a nine!?" Gumshoe was shocked "Well...Now that you put it that way pal!-" He was interrupted by an utter of "OBJECTION!" however it was NOT Phoenix. It was Miles Edgeworth, His finger swerving in a circle pattern around the table. "Mr. Wright, You must remember, Do you have a cell phone?" Phoenix looked confused "Yes Mr. Edgeworth, Why?" Edgeworth laughed, "It's only natural that the victim had one as well!" Phoenix gacked, he could tell this was not good. Edgeworth held up a slip of paper, "The victim's cellphone call record showed the numbers "911" but he couldn't say anything before the crack of a bullet silenced him." The Judge thought "Hmmm" he said "I see, the court takes the call record into evidence." "Darn!" Phoenix thought "Edgeworth you git!" Edgeworth laughed "Obviously the defendant dialed a nine at last breath to lead us the wrong way."

Comment on what you think so far and I will get to Chapter 8 Friday! (Maybye)
I'm not Wrong YOU'RE just not made of EPIC WIN
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Unexpected Turnabout!, Intro through Chapter 5 (incomplete) Out now! Last Update 2/24/09!
http://forums.court-records.net/viewtopic.php?f=11&t=14030&start=0


Last edited by EdElricNeko on Sun Apr 19, 2009 3:30 pm, edited 11 times in total.
Re: Unexpected Turnabout (SPOILERS FOR JFA END)Topic%20Title
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~~

Gender: Female

Location: At my computer

Rank: Prosecutor

Joined: Tue Sep 02, 2008 9:03 am

Posts: 883

I think it's really good. The only thing is that you should just put the whole thing in a spoiler tag, instead of a single sentence. It would make your work so much more neater and readable. Also you could just edit your first post to include future chapters in this way, adding a new tag each edit. Also, as this was the intro, then the next chapter should really be Chapter 1, not 2. Otherwise, good job and I can't wait for the next chapter.

By the way, do you have a beta reader? If you don't, I would be more than happy to do it for you.
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♥Twatanorm♥
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Re: Unexpected Turnabout (SPOILERS FOR JFA END)Topic%20Title
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An Attorney that's NOT short

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Rank: Suspect

Joined: Fri Feb 20, 2009 8:58 pm

Posts: 39

Oh, Thank you :phoenix:

No I don't have a Beta Reader but the position is open and thanks for the offer ^^

I'll try to make edits later but I'm going outside now X3

~Chapter 1 Coming soon.
I'm not Wrong YOU'RE just not made of EPIC WIN
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Unexpected Turnabout!, Intro through Chapter 5 (incomplete) Out now! Last Update 2/24/09!
http://forums.court-records.net/viewtopic.php?f=11&t=14030&start=0
Re: Unexpected Turnabout (SPOILERS FOR JFA END)Topic%20Title
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The Mouth of Sauron

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Rank: Decisive Witness

Joined: Mon Mar 24, 2008 3:07 pm

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"~Chapter 1 Coming soon."

I thought that was chapter one.

To your credit, I had a good laugh.
Gozu wrote:
omg ur just lik :edgeworth:

did ur parents di or somefin

icer wrote:
Trucy: [Daddy was fired from legal clerk for loitering] Daddy has a fun new job as a street sweeper!
Phoenix: Guess what Apollo, today I swept up some EVIDENCE! ....
Re: Unexpected Turnabout (SPOILERS FOR JFA END)Topic%20Title
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An Attorney that's NOT short

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Rank: Suspect

Joined: Fri Feb 20, 2009 8:58 pm

Posts: 39

Emperor Ing wrote:
"~Chapter 1 Coming soon."

I thought that was chapter one.

To your credit, I had a good laugh.


Intro is just intro as Amy stated :yuusaku:

To your carelessness, I had a good laugh :godot: ((I just HAD to go there XD))
I'm not Wrong YOU'RE just not made of EPIC WIN
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Unexpected Turnabout!, Intro through Chapter 5 (incomplete) Out now! Last Update 2/24/09!
http://forums.court-records.net/viewtopic.php?f=11&t=14030&start=0
Re: Unexpected Turnabout (SPOILERS FOR JFA END)Topic%20Title
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Otaku, #1 Machi fan, #2 Machi Fan

Gender: Male

Location: Engl- Ooh, over 3000 posts. (England)

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Joined: Fri Sep 28, 2007 4:06 pm

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To be fair, your original post did say "Chapter 1."

...I think?
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ALL GLORY TO THE HYPNOGANT
Re: Unexpected Turnabout (SPOILERS FOR JFA END)Topic%20Title
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An Attorney that's NOT short

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Joined: Fri Feb 20, 2009 8:58 pm

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I know but I just edited it =D
Mwaha~..
Okay I begin work on Chapter 1!
I'm not Wrong YOU'RE just not made of EPIC WIN
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Unexpected Turnabout!, Intro through Chapter 5 (incomplete) Out now! Last Update 2/24/09!
http://forums.court-records.net/viewtopic.php?f=11&t=14030&start=0
Re: Unexpected Turnabout (Intro-Chpt1 Last updated 2/21/09!)Topic%20Title
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An Attorney that's NOT short

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Bump to promote! Intro-Chapter 1 is up!
I'm not Wrong YOU'RE just not made of EPIC WIN
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Unexpected Turnabout!, Intro through Chapter 5 (incomplete) Out now! Last Update 2/24/09!
http://forums.court-records.net/viewtopic.php?f=11&t=14030&start=0
Re: Unexpected Turnabout (Intro-Chpt2 Last updated 2/21/09!)Topic%20Title
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An Attorney that's NOT short

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Joined: Fri Feb 20, 2009 8:58 pm

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Bump. Chapter 2 now up!
I'm not Wrong YOU'RE just not made of EPIC WIN
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Unexpected Turnabout!, Intro through Chapter 5 (incomplete) Out now! Last Update 2/24/09!
http://forums.court-records.net/viewtopic.php?f=11&t=14030&start=0
Re: Unexpected Turnabout (Intro-Chpt2 Last updated 2/21/09!)Topic%20Title
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~~

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Joined: Tue Sep 02, 2008 9:03 am

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Both Chapter 1 and 2 are awesome. I think you really have a talent for writing.

Just make the chapters a little bit longer. By the way, I think that you should put each chapter in its own spoiler tag, so whoever is reading doesn't have to scroll down past old chapters to get to new ones.

My offer is still open to beta read. Just PM me.
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♥Twatanorm♥
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Re: Unexpected Turnabout (Intro-Chpt2 Last updated 2/21/09!)Topic%20Title
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wow, great story! you did a good job keeping franzy in character, her diologue was just the kind of things i would imagine her to say! :franny:
i guess it was only a matter of time before franziska got arrested for murder - after all, its happened to pretty much all the main characters by now!!! :phoenix: :edgeworth: :maya: :larry:
i can't wait for chapter 3!
xxx
Re: Unexpected Turnabout (Intro-Chpt2 Last updated 2/21/09!)Topic%20Title
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An Attorney that's NOT short

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Joined: Fri Feb 20, 2009 8:58 pm

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To Amy: Yeah, Good Idea, And sure, I'll send a PM soon.
To Kitty_Sneeze: Thanks =3 , And yeah, It was only a matter of time before Franzy was arrested.
I'm not Wrong YOU'RE just not made of EPIC WIN
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Unexpected Turnabout!, Intro through Chapter 5 (incomplete) Out now! Last Update 2/24/09!
http://forums.court-records.net/viewtopic.php?f=11&t=14030&start=0
Re: Unexpected Turnabout (Intro-Chpt3 Last updated 2/22/09!)Topic%20Title
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An Attorney that's NOT short

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Rank: Suspect

Joined: Fri Feb 20, 2009 8:58 pm

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Chapter 3 Up!
I'm not Wrong YOU'RE just not made of EPIC WIN
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Unexpected Turnabout!, Intro through Chapter 5 (incomplete) Out now! Last Update 2/24/09!
http://forums.court-records.net/viewtopic.php?f=11&t=14030&start=0
Re: Unexpected Turnabout (Intro-Chpt3 Last updated 2/22/09!)Topic%20Title
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~Vervollkommnung~

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An interesting concept.

Keep writing, you're pretty good!
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"So when you run out of paint, you Americans use gravy as a substitute. I see."- :no-no:
"Welcome back to reality! We've been waiting for you."- :kyouya-pull:
Re: Unexpected Turnabout (Intro-Chpt4 Last updated 2/23/09!)Topic%20Title
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i just read chapters 4 and 5, great job! i cant believe maya was so desperate to stop for burgers! typical maya XD :maya:
one little thing i noticed was that you dont have many paragraphs, i think it would be easier to read if you put some spaces between sentences as its just a big block of text. but apart from that, fab!
from kitty sneeze :pearl:
xxx
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Re: Unexpected Turnabout (Intro-Chpt5 Last updated 2/24/09!)Topic%20Title
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An Attorney that's NOT short

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Rank: Suspect

Joined: Fri Feb 20, 2009 8:58 pm

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Chapter 5 Up!
I'm not Wrong YOU'RE just not made of EPIC WIN
Image

Unexpected Turnabout!, Intro through Chapter 5 (incomplete) Out now! Last Update 2/24/09!
http://forums.court-records.net/viewtopic.php?f=11&t=14030&start=0
Re: Unexpected Turnabout (Hiatus broke! Last updated 4/18/09!)Topic%20Title
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An Attorney that's NOT short

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Rank: Suspect

Joined: Fri Feb 20, 2009 8:58 pm

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HIATUS BROKE!
Chapter 6 is up!
I'm not Wrong YOU'RE just not made of EPIC WIN
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Unexpected Turnabout!, Intro through Chapter 5 (incomplete) Out now! Last Update 2/24/09!
http://forums.court-records.net/viewtopic.php?f=11&t=14030&start=0
Re: Unexpected Turnabout (Hiatus broke! Last updated 4/18/09!)Topic%20Title
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"I'm on my way! Finally!"

Gender: Female

Location: Noun: You're mom's bed. XD *shot*

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Oh em gee, finish, you fool!

...

I mean, you're doing really well. Please don't leave us hangin'.
Re: Unexpected Turnabout (Hiatus broke! Last updated 4/18/09!)Topic%20Title
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An Attorney that's NOT short

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Rank: Suspect

Joined: Fri Feb 20, 2009 8:58 pm

Posts: 39

Yeah sorry about that, My internet is bust and I'm trying my best to post more.
I'm not Wrong YOU'RE just not made of EPIC WIN
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Unexpected Turnabout!, Intro through Chapter 5 (incomplete) Out now! Last Update 2/24/09!
http://forums.court-records.net/viewtopic.php?f=11&t=14030&start=0
Re: Unexpected Turnabout (Hiatus broke! Last updated 4/19/09!)Topic%20Title
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An Attorney that's NOT short

Gender: None specified

Rank: Suspect

Joined: Fri Feb 20, 2009 8:58 pm

Posts: 39

Chapter 7 up!
I'm not Wrong YOU'RE just not made of EPIC WIN
Image

Unexpected Turnabout!, Intro through Chapter 5 (incomplete) Out now! Last Update 2/24/09!
http://forums.court-records.net/viewtopic.php?f=11&t=14030&start=0
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