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Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! https://forums.court-records.net/viewtopic.php?f=11&t=21506 |
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Author: | Ana R. [ Tue Dec 22, 2015 5:26 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
I'll probably leave the Undertale one for someone else. I'm not too familiar with the game. |
Author: | cuteyounggirlplus [ Tue Dec 22, 2015 5:29 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
@ArrowLawn Okay, I'll just look forward to the Sonic one. |
Author: | WhatTheWhat [ Tue Dec 22, 2015 8:11 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
@ArrowLawn Can I do that sporking? Or is it taken? |
Author: | Ana R. [ Tue Dec 22, 2015 9:06 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
WhatTheWhat wrote: @ArrowLawn Can I do that sporking? Or is it taken? The Undertale one? Or Turnabout Egg? AFAIK they're both free, so go ahead. |
Author: | Polly [ Tue Dec 22, 2015 9:31 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
ArrowLawn wrote: We got new material! https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11682100/1 ... nabout-egg That name look familiar? :V I wouldn't mind doing this fic for my first sporking, unless somebody else wants it. WhatTheWhat wrote: @ArrowLawn Can I do that sporking? Or is it taken? Not sure if you're talking about Turnabout Egg or the Undertale fic. But like I said above, if you want Turnabout Egg, go right ahead. |
Author: | WhatTheWhat [ Wed Dec 23, 2015 9:27 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
I want it but, if it's going to be your first sporking and you want it, take it. I'll live. Where the hell is everyone? |
Author: | Rubia Ryu the Royal [ Wed Dec 23, 2015 9:53 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
Christmas vacation. But in my defense, I've been getting my blog project stuff back on track |
Author: | Polly [ Thu Dec 24, 2015 2:33 am ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
WhatTheWhat wrote: I want it but, if it's going to be your first sporking and you want it, take it. I'll live. Where the hell is everyone? Go right ahead, you can have it. I just wanted to make sure I didn't start one somebody else was going to do. There are other fics I was thinking of anyway. |
Author: | Skittlemask [ Sun Dec 27, 2015 12:05 am ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
I apologize for the delay, but some things came up that I couldn't get out of. Better late than never, right? Title- Shattered Psyche Rating- This fic is, well… unrealistic. But it certainly could've been worse. This one seemed fun to spork and I also needed practice writing Franziska. The fic isn't really a Christmas fic, but rather takes place at Christmas. So yes, there were some other fics I could've chosen, but six or seven of them were rehashes of the Christmas Carol with Edgeworth and one with Franziska. Since Pessimistic already sporked one, I decided not to touch any of them. I figured this one would be more interesting. Now, let's begin! Today's sporkers are… Miles Edgeworth! "…I should've known this long break wouldn't last." Maya Fey! "Ooh Nick, look! Tinsel! A-And gingerbread cookies!" Phoenix Wright! "As long as there aren't any mistletoe around…" and… Franziska von Karma! "Any mistletoe around and the management will be looking forward to a mouthful of whip for Christmas." [The sporking theatre is decked out in full Christmas attire. A Christmas tree is in the corner, lights flickering and presents under a tree. Stockings are hung along a wall with a table full of goodies right underneath, and a fake Santa with some of his elves are occupying a few seats in the back. Lastly, there is literal snow on the floor. Sadly, there is no mistletoe.] Franziska: Thank goodness. Speakers: The management will keep that in mind for next time. Thanks for the suggestion! *crack* Phoenix: A-Agh! W-What was that for!? Franziska: You're the one who brought up the mistletoe in the first place, Phoenix Wright! Phoenix: …R-Right. I'm honestly more concerned w-with how cold it is in here right now. Maya: Aw Nick, it's not too bad! Look, there's even hot chocolate to keep us warm! [Phoenix eagerly goes to the table and grabs a mug of hot chocolate while Edgeworth and Franziska take their seats.] Edgeworth: Hmm, it seems that the presents under the tree have our names on them. Franziska: Hah. How old do they think we are? I see that Maya Fey has the biggest present of all. [Phoenix and Maya return from the snack table. Maya has a big stack of gingerbread men and Christmas tree brownies piled high on a plate. She nearly drops her snacks at the mention of presents.] Maya: Presents? For me? Ooh, can we open them now? I want to open them now! Speakers: You all have to wait until after the sporking. If you try to peek, then we'll keep your present. We're talking to you, Maya. Maya: Aww... Speakers: Now, let's get started! Quote: Shattered Psyche By: Lamia of the Dark Franziska: What a foolish name. Maya: I dunno, maybe it kind of fits? Phoenix: …I'm not sure how I'm supposed to feel about reading a Christmas fic written by someone "of the dark." Edgeworth: I'm not sure how I am supposed to feel about a Christmas story titled "Shattered Psyche." Maya: Maybe it's a fic about us breaking psyche-locks? Phoenix: I doubt it, Maya. Quote: DISCLAIMER: Phoenix Wright belongs to Capcom and is being used here without permission. - Shattered Psyche - 6:37 a.m., December 23, Manfred von Karma's office Edgeworth: Nngh! This isn't how a Christmas story should start! Maya: But Mr. Edgeworth, it's not Christmas yet! Look, it's only December 23rd. Franziska: …What do you mean by that, little brother? Did you not like spending time in my papa's office? Edgeworth: N-Not for Christmas, no. Quote: Edgeworth stands in the doorway. "Franziska's coming for Christmas," he says in a bored tone. "And to gloat over her latest victories in person, no doubt." Franziska: Hmph. I'm sure I would chastise you for your imperfect record instead. Phoenix: (Knowing Franziska, she'd probably do both.) Franziska: I see what you're thinking, Phoenix Wright. It's written all over your foolish face. Phoenix: (She… didn't whip me?) Franziska: Don't count yourself lucky. Quote: 9:45 p.m., Christmas Eve, von Karma house, guest room Maya: That's it!? What was the point of that scene? Edgeworth: I believe it was to tell us that Franziska is coming for Christmas. Although, they could've told us that in a more relevant scene. Phoenix: Or they could've just made the scene longer and more interesting. Maya: Yeah! I mean, the first line was "Edgeworth stands in the doorway." Boring! Quote: She is sitting at the desk, reading, oblivious to the presence of another person in the room. "Merry Christmas, Franziska." She looks up. BANG. Phoenix: What fantastic sound effects! Maya: Well, that's kind of how they are in the games. Speakers: The management would like to remind Maya Fey that breaking the fourth wall is strictly prohibited. Seriously, do you want us to take away your present? Maya: N-No! I'll be good, I promise! Phoenix: (…The day we beg to the management. What have we come to?) Franziska: You fools are forgetting about the most important thing here! Wasn't I just shot? Maya: Dunno. Probably. If you're killed, I bet it's Mr. Edgeworth. I sensed animosity when he spoke to Mr. von Karma earlier. Phoenix: …Do you want to take that bet? Maya: You're on, Nick! Quote: The chair falls over backward, leaving her body lying in a crumpled heap on the floor. There is blood everywhere. Edgeworth: Well, I suppose that answers that question. Franziska: Grr…! *pulls whip taut* Who would dare to murder me!? My papa will find them guilty in court! Phoenix: Well, uh, on the bright side, you're not in this fic anymore! Franziska: Hmph, you're right. Perhaps I can relax and enjoy watching my murderer's punishment. *puts whip to the side* Maya Fey, hand me a cookie. Maya: Uh, sure… Quote: 10:30 p.m., Christmas Eve, von Karma house Manfred discovers Franziska's body, calls the police, and is promptly arrested for her murder. Phoenix: We're already onto a new scene? Franziska: And papa was arrested for my murder? That's preposterous! Whoever decided to arrest him should be fired! Edgeworth: I'm assuming that I'm going to be the prosecutor... Quote: 10:45 p.m., unknown location, Christmas party Maya: Why are these scenes so short!? Is the whole fic in two sentence scenes? Edgeworth: I sure hope not. If it was, I believe the management would've given this more than two Sahwits. Quote: Edgeworth's cell phone rings at almost the exact same instant as Phoenix Wright's. Phoenix: Are we both at a Christmas party? Why would I go to a Christmas party in an unknown location? Sounds pretty creepy to me... Edgeworth: Honestly Wright, I can imagine seeing you go to such a thing in the middle of nowhere of which you know nothing about. Phoenix: H-Hey! Edgeworth: Nevertheless, a better question to ask is why I would bother going to a Christmas party at all. Maya: Ooh, I know! You really are the killer and you're going to a party to make yourself look less suspicious! Phoenix: If anything, I think that would make him look more suspicious… Quote: Both calls are about the same case. Both men agree to take it on. Phoenix: Wait a minute, I'm a private law firm! Because of that, I shouldn't get the call at the same time as Edgeworth. Also, I normally wouldn't agree to take on a case unless I've met the defendant beforehand. Franziska: That's unimportant! Miles Edgeworth! Why would you agree to prosecute papa's case? After all he's done for you! Edgeworth: Well, this is only fic-me… (And that didn't stop him from prosecuting my trial...) Quote: 11:50 p.m., Christmas Eve, Gourd Lake Maya: *sips hot chocolate* Cookies, Nick? Phoenix: Sure. Thanks, Maya. Maya: How 'bout you, Mr. Edgeworth? Edgeworth: No, thank you. Quote: A murder is taking place. It is of little consequence. The victim is Robert Hammond. The only suspect is Yanni Yogi, who (despite Winston Payne's incompetence as a prosecutor) will be convicted at his trial. Phoenix: *shoves cookie in mouth* I'd like to see that happen. Quote: 10:00 a.m., Christmas, Manfred's Trial Maya: I sure hope his trial is more than three sentences long. Phoenix: Maybe the three sentences will be equivalent to the three minutes that von Karma wanted Edgeworth's trial to last. Maya: Yeah, then he'd get a taste of his own medicine! *crack* Phoenix: Yowch! Quote: The judge seems duly surprised that Edgeworth is prosecuting his own mentor's trial. Somehow, Phoenix is not surprised. He knows this isn't going to be easy. There weren't any witnesses at the scene so after the evidence is introduced, the only person Edgeworth will be able to call to the stand is Manfred himself. Phoenix already knows that Manfred's alibi won't hold up in court, because he has no proof of where he was between the time he left the Prosecutor's Office that night and the time he called the police. Franziska: My papa would never hire such a third-rate and foolishly foolish defense attorney! Phoenix: And I would never defe… *glances at Franziska* Uh, wow, looks like I'm out of hot chocolate! I'd better go get some more! Speakers: Sit down. Phoenix: Y-Yes sir… Quote: Phoenix is relying on a risky strategy. Edgeworth: That's not surprising. Maya: Yeah, but is there anything Nick hasn't done? Franziska: There's always something new with the man. What's worse is that he's using such a risky move with my papa's defense! Phoenix: Uh, well, no risk no glory? Edgeworth: I believe the phrase is "no risk, no reward." [Phoenix tries to find something wrong with the detective's testimony, but ends up only confirming that the weapon belonged to Manfred and that he had the opportunity to commit the murder.] Franziska: Of course it's the one time that Scruffy doesn't mess up his testimony. Edgeworth: In that case, it's probably a different detective. Quote: Manfred is glaring at Phoenix as the detective leaves the stand. Phoenix glances nervously at his client. Yes, Edgeworth has him on the fence here. But Phoenix has an ace in the hole. Of course, it all depends on Maya… Maya: On me? Aw, Nick~! I finally get to help in a trial! Phoenix: You're always helpful during a trial. (OK… most of the time.) Maya: Oh, that's right! But this time it depends on me. Phoenix: (Yikes!) Quote: "As there were no witnesses to the crime, the prosecution now calls the accused, Manfred von Karma, to the stand." Now's the time to raise an objection. Phoenix slams his hands on his desk, then points his finger (in that special way he has of doing just that) and shouts "OBJECTION!" Everyone in the courtroom turns to look at him. "The defense requests to hear the testimony of the victim herself!" All… Franziska: What kind of foolishly foolish farce is this!? I will not stand for such foolishness in the court room! Phoenix: I… I have a bad feeling about this… Quote: "The victim…?" The judge asks faintly. He is clearly confused. "Mr. Wright this is a murder trial." "I know that," Phoenix replies, with a cocky grin. "But I just so happen to have a spirit medium with me…" Edgeworth: Hmph, how ridiculous. No court of law should allow such a person to testify. Besides, they should know what happened in the past. Phoenix & Maya: … Quote: "This is highly irregular," the judge says. "But if the prosecution has no objection to this…" Phoenix hasn't learned much about the DL-6 incident at this point in time and doesn't know about Edgeworth's feelings on spirit mediums. (Namely, that he thinks they're all phony.) Even so, he's not that surprised when he hears Edgeworth say, "I have no objection, but the prosecution refuses to acknowledge the witness unless the defense can prove beyond a reasonable doubt that it is indeed Franziska von Karma." Edgeworth: … Phoenix: Well, you didn't object, so… Edgeworth: The only justifiable reason I can think of is to make you look like an idiot. Phoenix: And that's justifiable? Edgeworth: Yes. Quote: "Is that so, Miles Edgeworth?" The voice comes from the witness stand. No one noticed Maya slipping out from behind the defense bench while they were deciding whether or not to allow Franziska's spirit as a witness. Edgeworth stares in shock. The body may be Maya Fey's, but that voice is definitely Franziska's. And if he has any doubts about her identity, they vanish as he watches her hand close into a fist as if she is reaching for something that isn't there. Her whip, of course, but there's no way Maya would have known that. It is obvious from the expression on Manfred's face that he had no clue Phoenix was planning to do something like this, either. "Th-the prosecution is satisfied that this witness is the victim," Edgeworth says nervously. Maya: Oh wow, look. Ms. von Karma still wants her whip even in death! Franziska: Of course I do. That way, I'll be able to whip some sense into the morons running this court. Phoenix: Sure… Anyway, I bet Edgeworth doesn't believe that all spirit medium are phony now. Edgeworth: It seems that fic-me's plan has backfired miserably. Quote: "Did you two know each other?" the judge asks in surprise, looking curiously between the witness and the prosecutor. Edgeworth: Honestly, if His Honor was surprised that I was prosecuting my own mentor's trial, then it should be obvious that I would've met his daughter at some point. Phoenix: Yeah, but he's our Judge. Edgeworth: …True. Quote: Edgeworth quickly regains his composure and replies calmly, "I'm sure you're aware that the defendant was, at one time, my mentor. Of course I was acquainted with his daughter, as well." "Alright, then. The court accepts this witness. Ms. von Karma, please testify about the night of the murder." Franziska's testimony consists of only three short statements. Franziska: Hm, short and concise. If only all witnesses could keep their testimonies like this. Edgeworth: Agreed. It would make our job much easier. Phoenix: Hey Edgeworth, are you sure you don't want to hear Oldbag talk up a storm? Edgeworth: *glare* Quote: "I was in the guest room, reading. I didn't notice anyone come in. He spoke to get my attention and I looked up. Then he shot me." All: … Phoenix: Well that felt useless. Franziska: Why didn't I say who my murderer was!? Maya: Maybe you didn't see them? Franziska: Preposterous! Someone such as myself wouldn't be murdered without knowing who killed me! Quote: Phoenix presses at the second statement. "You looked up…? So you must have seen the killer. Please state his name for the court." "I can't," Franziska replies, looking away. "You… can't?" Phoenix asks, sweating bullets. "No." Franziska: There's no way I would be so foolish as to cover for my own murderer! Especially if papa's being accused. Edgeworth: … Quote: Phoenix moves on to the third statement and presses there. "You said 'he' shot you. So we know the killer was a man. Can tell us anything else to shed light on the killer's identity?" Before she can answer, Edgeworth raises an objection. "The witness has already testified that she cannot identify the killer. If you have no other questions, I'm afraid we'll have to ask her to step down…" Phoenix looks over the testimony again. He decides to press on the first statement, just to see what kind of information comes up. "What were you reading?" "The case file for my next trial," Franziska replies without hesitation. Phoenix: And here I thought that you were actually reading an interesting book. Franziska: Any one of my cases is plenty interesting. A von Karma doesn't slack off like some foolish defense attorney that I know of. Phoenix: Hey! I do paperwork and stuff! Maya: Pfft. Phoenix: I do! Maya: Sure, Nick. Quote: "The victim was also a prosecutor," Edgeworth explains. "The case file was found out the scene." He presents a bloodstained file folder. "From the parts we could decipher, we were able to determine the case itself has nothing to do with the victim's own murder." The judge looks over the folder's contents briefly and dismisses it as evidence. Phoenix goes over the remaining two statements again, and presses at the third. "How much time passed between the time you looked up and the time he shot you?" Finally, an intelligent question, Edgeworth thinks to himself sarcastically. Not that it's going to get you anywhere. Phoenix: All of my questions were intelligent. Edgeworth & Maya: Not really. Phoenix: Well it's not my fault that the witness hardly gave us any information. *crack* Phoenix: A-Argh! Franziska: If I were to give testimony, it would be perfect. It's not my fault that the author decided to write my character like that! Phoenix: I never said it was your fault! Quote: "Maybe I didn't make myself clear," Franziska replies, sounding a little irritated. "He had the shot lined up before he caught my attention. The only thing out of position was… me. When I looked up, he pulled the trigger." "The defense requests that the witness amend her testimony!" The third statement now reads: "He shot me as soon as I looked up." Phoenix doesn't press there. He backtracks to the second statement and presses there, asking the question he ignored the first time through. "What did he say to you?" Franziska hesitates. The courtroom is deadly silent. "He said 'Merry Christmas, Franziska'." Everyone in the courtroom turns to look at Edgeworth. Edgeworth: …Why is everyone looking at me? Maya: I know! They all telepathically know that you're the killer! Edgeworth: Please don't entertain impossible scenarios like that. Maya: It's not impossible. Have you ever played 999? Phoenix: That's just a game, Maya. Maya: So? We're just a g-g-great people with… supernatural powers! Speakers: Hm, nice save. But it could've been better. Quote: "Right?" the prosecutor asks. The witness nods once in affirmation. "How… do you know that…?" Phoenix croaks out. He has a nasty feeling that he already knows the answer. Edgeworth: So it was me who said that line before? It would've been nice if it was said beforehand. Quote: "Because I'm the one who shot her," Edgeworth replies with a sadistic smile. Maya: So I was right! Pa- Edgeworth: …I've changed my mind. Maya: Huh? Edgeworth: Give me one of those snacks that you have there, please. Maya: Oh, sure! Edgeworth: *takes a big bite of brownie and stares at screen* Quote: "YOU WHAT?!" roars the judge. "I killed Franziska von Karma." Franziska: Out of all the foolishly foolish ways that this could've gone… Phoenix: I wonder what his motive could've been? [Phoenix is curious as to why Edgeworth would do something like that. He responds with revenge.] Quote: Manfred finally finds his voice. "You… how can you do this to me? I took you into my home and raised you and this is how you repay me?" Edgeworth: Well, I don't really owe you much… Franziska: Despite what he's done, if it wasn't for my papa you would be a sad, worthless heap, Miles Edgeworth! Maya: Uh, maybe he's still a sad heap? Edgeworth: I'm not depressed, Maya. I'm perfectly content with the way things are now. Quote: "That's rich coming from you," Edgeworth shouts back, "after you tried to set me up for the Gourd Lake murder. Of course, it was easy for me to figure out your plan. You thought I'd want revenge against Robert Hammond for getting my father's murderer off the hook, but you never realized I knew Yanni Yogi was innocent. You see, I was awake when the elevator door opened fifteen years ago… I've known you were the one who killed my father the whole time. And as for you taking me in and raising me, I could have refused to go with you. I'm sure Wright's family would have taken me in, or Larry's. I could have refused to become a prosecutor. But I did go with you. Because where better to form my plans for revenge that in your very own home?" Maya: Wow, that's a lot to take in all at once… Phoenix: Wait, wait, wait. So they're trying to tell me that a nine year old kid planned out this whole thing and waited fifteen years to carry it out? Edgeworth: And if I knew that Yanni Yogi was innocent, why wouldn't I tell the police who the murderer was? That way they wouldn't have to turn to a spirit medium for help… Maya: Maybe because that's too simple and you wanted a "proper" revenge? Edgeworth: …That's not how I think. Franziska: Especially when you were nine years old. You weren't very bright back then. Quote: Manfred was speechless with shock and rage, but someone else in the courtroom wasn't. "How long…" If not for the utter silence in the courtroom, Edgeworth may not have heard the quiet voice from the witness stand. "How long were you planning this…?" "To kill you? Since the moment I found out you existed," Edgeworth replied offhandedly. "This particular plan, just a few days… once I was invited to Gourd Lake, and realized I already had a perfect alibi for the night, provided by my dear friend Phoenix Wright." "The Christmas party…" Phoenix groaned, hanging his head. Phoenix: Umm, at that point in time Edgeworth and I weren't such great buds yet. Why would I invite him to my Christmas party? Especially in an unknown location? Edgeworth: You still haven't dropped that? Phoenix: No! Was it at the office? My house? What other places could I have a Christmas party at!? Quote: "So, when you called and asked me come for Christmas…" She lets the question hang in the air unfinished. Tears are pouring down her face. Franziska: I wouldn't be so foolish as to forget to say the word "to" in my speech! *whips floor* Quote: The judge comes to senses and orders Edgeworth arrested for Franziska's murder and Manfred arrested on suspicion of being the killer in the DL-6 incident. Phoenix has the presence of mind to go over to the witness stand and take the distraught young woman into his arms. After being so heartlessly betrayed by someone she trusted, she deserves at least a moment of comfort before she leaves this world once and for all. *crack* Phoenix: Gah! Franziska: I don't need a hug from you; I'll just go back home to wherever dead people go! Besides, this fic it utter foolishness! *crack* Phoenix: I-I'm sorry! It won't happen again, I promise. Franziska: Hmph, good. Quote: She slumps against him, and when she opens her eyes Phoenix can see that she is Maya Fey once more. Maya rubs her eyes as if she is just waking up from a good night's sleep and is surprised to find her face wet with tears. "Nick, what's going on? Why are they arresting Mr. Edgeworth and Mr. von Karma?" "I'll… explain later…" Phoenix replies in a strained voice, hugging Maya tightly. -end- Franziska: Thank goodness. Speakers: Don't get too comfortable yet… Quote: Alternate Ending Maya: I think this is the first time that I've seen an alternate ending in a fanfic… Edgeworth: Those should be left to games and the sort. It would be most unprofessional to have a real published book to have an alternate ending. Then there's no end. Franziska: No matter what happens, the author can't redeem this farce. Quote: She is sitting at the desk, reading, oblivious to the presence of another person in the room. The gun sits heavily in his pocket. He starts to take it out, then stops. No matter how carefully he may have cultivated this plan, he can't carry it out. Not because it isn't possible. No, this is a perfect opportunity. He is standing right beside her and she hasn't even noticed him. The reason he can't do it is because he knows what will happen to his heart if he fires the bullet that takes her life. "Merry Christmas, Franziska." At the sound of his voice, she looks up. He leans down and kisses her firmly on the mouth. All: … Phoenix: Well, it went from killing to kissing. That's… quite a leap. Edgeworth and Franziska: … Phoenix: Uh, guys? Edgeworth: *stands up and sits next to Maya* Franziska: *pulls whip taut* Quote: A moment later he pulls away. She stares at him, speechless. "Why don't you forget about work for one night? This is a holiday," he says, with a soft smile. "I was on my way to a Christmas party. You could come with me…" He leaves the invitation hanging. Phoenix: …(I invited you, not her! She'd probably scare away what little guests I have…) Edgeworth: I know what you're thinking, Wright. I believe you should be more concerned with the fact that Larry will most likely be there. Phoenix: Oh yeah… Quote: - at the Christmas party - "You never told me you were bringing a date," Phoenix says as Edgeworth makes his way toward him with Franziska following close behind. "It was a last-minute thing," Edgeworth replies. "It's not really a date." "Of course it's a date," Franziska says with a sly grin, pressing close to his side. Edgeworth returns the grin. Franziska: Argh! *crack* *crack* *crack* *crack* Phoenix: ! (She just… whipped the floor? Well, poor floor, I guess...) Quote: There is more than one way to take a man's daughter away from him… Edgeworth: Well, that is true, but… Maya: But what? Did you want to kill Ms. von Karma? Edgeworth: No, of course not. It's just that… Phoenix: Just what? Edgeworth: Never mind. It's unimportant. Speakers: Well, the fic is over. So if you would all proceed to the Christmas tree to get your presents… That includes you, Franziska. Franziska: *annoyed huff* Maya: C'mon, let's go! Who gets to open theirs first? Can I? Speakers: Yeah, you can go first. After you Phoenix Wright can go. Maya: Goody! Mine's so big, I wonder what it could be? [Maya wastes no time in tearing the paper off the present. In fact, she even manages to get the bow stuck in Phoenix's hair. I wonder how that could've happened…] Maya: A… statue of burgers? Hey, it looks so yummy I could eat it! Phoenix: Um, how are you going to get that home? Maya: Hmm, good question. I don't think the elders would like this in the village… Speakers: We'll use the teleporter, no worries. And we'll teleport it to the office. That solves the problem! Phoenix: (Oh joy…) Speakers: Your turn, Phoenix Wright. [Phoenix takes much more time to unwrap his present. It almost seems like he's doing it on purpose…] Maya: C'mon you old fart! What's taking so long? *tears the rest of the paper off for him* Phoenix: It's… an apron, a washcloth, and some soap? Speakers: That way, you'll be able to clean more than just the toilet. Isn't it great? Phoenix: Yes, how thoughtful… (What does an apron have to do with cleaning?) Speakers: You're up, Franziska. Franziska: Let's get this over with. *tears paper off quickly* Edgeworth: You got a book titled "Law for Dummies?" Phoenix: *snicker* Franziska: …You must've given this to the wrong person. *hands book to Phoenix* This is the perfect book for you. I want Chapter 1 read for tomorrow morning, is that clear? Phoenix: Yeah, thanks… (Now I've got homework for Christmas…) Edgeworth: I suppose I'm last… [Edgeworth carefully takes off the paper, as if he's going to reuse it later. In his hand is a box.] Maya: Open it, open it! Edgeworth: It's a porcelain doll. Very funny, management. Speakers: Huh!? We didn't… Oh yeah, uh, your real present will arrive shortly. We just wanted to play a trick! Haha, yes, that's exactly what we wanted to do! [A Santa hat falls from the ceiling, right onto Edgeworth's lap.] Maya: Aww, how cute! You should put it on, Mr. Edgeworth! Edgeworth: Uh, maybe later. Maya: Why not now!? I can put it on for you if you like! Phoenix: Maya, just leave Edgeworth alone for now. Look, your present was already teleported to my office. Don't you want to see it? Maya: Oh yeah. Let's go, Nick! [They both leave the theatre with Edgeworth and Franziska right behind them, and that brings our Christmas sporking to a close. We hope you enjoyed that! We hope you all had a Merry Christmas!] Speakers: … [Is there something wrong, sir?] Speakers: We totally put that doll in there, definitely. The Janitor will throw it away later today. It was such a funny joke, right, narrator? Hahaha… [Whatever you say, sir.] |
Author: | Rubia Ryu the Royal [ Sun Dec 27, 2015 4:06 am ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
I swear, if that doll shows up yet again, I'm getting myself a new chewtoy... Nicely done! I could really feel the jolly holiday spirit throughout, aside from the disconcerted grumblings of lawyers, and the presents were suprisingly sweet coming from the Management. As you said, the fic was nonsensical but in the boring way, so I can understand that the characters wouldn't feel very interested in it. Well, I guess in prep of the New Year's, a more hard-hitting fic would be more appropriate, and I have such a fic to spork... hopefully, it'll be ready by before New Year's. |
Author: | splashseven [ Sun Dec 27, 2015 5:48 am ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
Oh my gosh, I can't stop laughing! That last Undertale trollfic is mine and I can't believe it got on here. I can't wait to see one of you tackle it. Also, first post! |
Author: | Rubia Ryu the Royal [ Sun Dec 27, 2015 8:19 am ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
Ah, welcome to the Theater. For some reason, we seem to draw in trollfic authors who love to see their silly works of art be destroyed. To be honest, I've become just a little jealous of those people whose works we've sporked so far. It's become pretty much an honor to have your work be featured in this thread. |
Author: | luck [ Sun Dec 27, 2015 9:46 am ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
Rubia Ryu the Royal wrote: Ah, welcome to the Theater. For some reason, we seem to draw in trollfic authors who love to see their silly works of art be destroyed. To be honest, I've become just a little jealous of those people whose works we've sporked so far. It's become pretty much an honor to have your work be featured in this thread. Well, we appear in the TVTropes fic recommendation page for ace attorney, after all. That's some cachet we have here. |
Author: | cuteyounggirlplus [ Sun Dec 27, 2015 11:33 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
Guess which kink meme had a bad fic challenge? @Skittlemask Great sporking for a boring fic. |
Author: | Rubia Ryu the Royal [ Mon Dec 28, 2015 1:12 am ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
cuteyounggirlplus wrote: What are we honestly supposed to do with these? I was expecting one that was beyond redemption, but all of them don't qualify... Say, who's doing the next KM special? Was it cygp with the carrot saga? Or did Airey have something else planned for it? |
Author: | cuteyounggirlplus [ Mon Dec 28, 2015 1:16 am ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
@Rubia I'm doing the Carrot Saga. It's not very good, though. |
Author: | Rubia Ryu the Royal [ Mon Dec 28, 2015 1:29 am ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
Having any trouble? Feel free to pm me if you need to. People seem to like the silly story elements I add to sporkings; helps give the sporking a bit more flavor even if the fic gets bland. |
Author: | DrOcsid [ Wed Dec 30, 2015 3:09 am ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
https://m.fanfiction.net/s/11700345/1/p ... bout-pearl i swear, these fics get more insane as they get published |
Author: | AireyVerkhovensky [ Wed Dec 30, 2015 5:53 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
Back from Christmas break and probably going to write a sporking in the next week or two! (How many times have I said this now...?) @Skittlemask: The doll is A Thing now, huh? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) |
Author: | luck [ Thu Dec 31, 2015 7:34 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
You know, I've been getting back into Pokemon lately, and I've got curious about posible crossover fics with ace attorney. https://m.fanfiction.net/Pok%C3%A9mon-and-Phoenix-Wright-Ace-Attorney-Crossovers/80/2414/ https://archiveofourown.org/works/search?utf8=%E2%9C%93&work_search%5Bquery%5D=ace+attorney+pokemon I haven't read any of them, but some sound quite sporkable. The shpping community is one of the most out there, by the way. |
Author: | AireyVerkhovensky [ Thu Dec 31, 2015 7:38 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
luck wrote: You know, I've been getting back into Pokemon lately, and I've got curious about posible crossover fics with ace attorney. https://m.fanfiction.net/Pok%C3%A9mon-and-Phoenix-Wright-Ace-Attorney-Crossovers/80/2414/ https://archiveofourown.org/works/search?utf8=%E2%9C%93&work_search%5Bquery%5D=ace+attorney+pokemon I haven't read any of them, but some sound quite sporkable. The shpping community is one of the most out there, by the way. "Neverending Romance: the incomplete nightmare" Well, I honestly can't argue with that. |
Author: | cuteyounggirlplus [ Sat Jan 02, 2016 7:00 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
Would you please leave some feedback on my characterization and humor? Thank you. The Sporking Theater presents: Kink Meme Special IV: The Carrot Saga Our sporkers today: Phoenix Wright! Maya Fey And last, but not least: Miles Edgeworth! (Miles Edgeworth, Phoenix Wright, and Maya Fey are teleported straight into the theater. Large popcorn buckets full of carrots are laying on top of the sporkers’ seats.) Edgeworth: Argh. Why do I have to be dragged into another one of these? Phoenix: The Management is unusually quiet for a Kink Meme Special, too. (I have a bad feeling about this…) Maya: Hey, don’t complain. At least Management gave us snacks! (Trying to prove her point, Maya grabs a carrot from her bucket and puts it into her mouth. Unfortunately, the sporking starts before she can eat the carrot.) Spoiler: (The lights flicker back on.) Edgeworth: Finally. That fic is finally over. And on to the next one! Edgeworth: Aaaarghh. (The lights go off.) Spoiler: (The lights flicker back on.) Edgeworth: Nnngh. First carrots, then bananas, what is next? Pineapples? Phoenix: I sure hope not. That would hurt. Maya: *shudders* Nick, why’d you have to say that… (The lights dim.) Spoiler: (The lights turn back on.) Phoenix: Well, that was… something. Very something. Edgeworth: And if the current trend continues, it will only get worse. (The lights turn back off.) Spoiler: (The lights flicker back on.) Edgeworth: I’m glad you two are enjoying yourselves at my expense. Maya: It’s better than being grumpy all the time. Edgeworth: Hmph. (Once the short break is over, the lights turn off.) Spoiler: (The lights flicker back on.) Edgeworth: ………… Phoenix: It’s just one more fic. Maya: Yeah, you can do it, Mister Edgeworth! Just believe in yourself. (The lights turn off.) Spoiler: (The lights flicker back on for one last time.) Edgeworth: Nobody ever speaks of this again. Phoenix: Agreed. I don’t even want to think of this again. Maya: No arguments here! (The sporkers three walk out of the theater, spilling their uneaten buckets of carrots onto the floor. What a waste, what a waste.) |
Author: | AireyVerkhovensky [ Sat Jan 02, 2016 7:12 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
I should have known that Edgeworth/cravat would make an appearance at some point. (Also, I laughed uncontrollably at the fact that the cravat man was named Paul for about five minutes... sort of inside joke-related.) Not a bad sporking, although I will say that it did seem kind of rushed - you often didn't have enough commentary imo, and both the entrance and exit were unusually short. Also, did you censor the swear words in the fic...? I find it unlikely that they would have been *ed out originally. I didn't see any major problems with your characterization, really. Although tone down the dirty jokes/relatively explicit discussions of sex in the future. Other than that, good. Pretty funny! |
Author: | cuteyounggirlplus [ Sat Jan 02, 2016 8:07 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
@Airey Yes, I did censor the words out. |
Author: | AireyVerkhovensky [ Sat Jan 02, 2016 8:46 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
cuteyounggirlplus wrote: @Airey Yes, I did censor the words out. Okay, you really don't have to do that. |
Author: | DrOcsid [ Wed Jan 06, 2016 1:43 am ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
AireyVerkhovensky wrote: cuteyounggirlplus wrote: @Airey Yes, I did censor the words out. Okay, you really don't have to do that. In fact, generally it would be better not to. It's funnier when you see the fic in its full glory. |
Author: | Rubia Ryu the Royal [ Wed Jan 06, 2016 4:20 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
Just dropping by to let people know that I have indeed been working on the next part of Hellspawn. Since I couldn't make it for New Year's, I decided to go long and take the sporking to 4 chapters of that thing. It's the least I could do after such a long absence, right? I still worry if I made it too long, though I didn't want to leave out too much. Also, I added a little new policy to my Management. It's up to the rest of you to decide if you want to include it in your future sporkings, but I hope it at least catches on a bit. |
Author: | MoonRaven [ Wed Jan 06, 2016 5:32 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
I think the vores at FF are deleted now... But from the same author is some Professor Layton vore... Didn't read them. |
Author: | AireyVerkhovensky [ Wed Jan 06, 2016 5:34 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
MoonRaven wrote: I think the vores at FF are deleted now... But from the same author is some Professor Layton vore... Didn't read them. Really? Dang, I was taking those, wasn't I... Well, vore's always easy to find. For some reason. |
Author: | Viktoria von Karma [ Wed Jan 06, 2016 5:49 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
Author: | AireyVerkhovensky [ Wed Jan 06, 2016 5:56 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
Here, I think this is the most recent iteration of the fanfic rec list. Granted, it does need to be updated again, so once you pick a fic double-check to see if it's been done/anyone's already claimed it, but there are plenty of fics up for grabs here. |
Author: | cuteyounggirlplus [ Wed Jan 06, 2016 6:04 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
@ von Karma Here's some fics I have bookmarked but anyone can spork them. http://pw-kink-meme.dreamwidth.org/3401 ... ad=9289289 http://bludhavens.livejournal.com/76919 ... d=33336439 http://bludhavens.livejournal.com/76919 ... #t33079159 http://pw-kink-meme.dreamwidth.org/3401 ... cmt9316681 http://pw-kink-meme.dreamwidth.org/3401 ... cmt9310537 http://bludhavens.livejournal.com/76919 ... #t33365879 |
Author: | luck [ Wed Jan 06, 2016 6:36 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
Rubia Ryu the Royal wrote: Just dropping by to let people know that I have indeed been working on the next part of Hellspawn. Since I couldn't make it for New Year's, I decided to go long and take the sporking to 4 chapters of that thing. It's the least I could do after such a long absence, right? I still worry if I made it too long, though I didn't want to leave out too much. Also, I added a little new policy to my Management. It's up to the rest of you to decide if you want to include it in your future sporkings, but I hope it at least catches on a bit. I'm looking forward to it. |
Author: | Viktoria von Karma [ Sun Jan 10, 2016 8:59 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
Would there be something wrong about giving Ace Attorney: Phoenix Wright Law and Order a try? Though it's a little old... Or did someone else do it after Thane did and I didn't notice? |
Author: | Rubia Ryu the Royal [ Sun Jan 10, 2016 9:27 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
I don't think anyone had taken it after he dropped it, so go ahead. I dun even remember what that fic was about, haha. It's been too long. :p I figure we can set a 3-month period "rule" for sporkers who queue fics. If they don't respond within that time saying that they're still working on it, then it's up for grabs. Just leave a note here to let everyone know! |
Author: | Rubia Ryu the Royal [ Fri Jan 15, 2016 1:45 am ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
Hello, people. Let’s pretend to turn the clock back a couple weeks and pretend it’s New Year’s Day all over again. To commemorate it, I present to you a double feature sporking – that is, it actually may count as two sporkings in one. Beware: It is long; 45 whole pages, in fact. Please spare some time before you start reading. Btw, thanks for reading! Featured fic: The Hellspawn Part 3-4 Cast: Overall rating: 3x Aw, it’s been several months since I’ve last visited the fic, and it’s just as droll as I remember it. <3 -------------------------------------------- [With the advent of the new year here, the Sporking Theater Management has decided on a new resolution for the sporkings to come.] Maya: A New Year’s resolution? Wow, I wonder what they’ve come up with this time! Franziska: Hopefully, it’s one that will actually come through for once. Phoenix: Ms. von Karma… you do realize their “resolution” may be detrimental to us all? Franziska: Some more so than others, for sure. If I were you, Phoenix Wright, I’d already be down on my knees and praying. Edgeworth: As tempting as it may be, when have any of our prayers come through in this place? Maya: Well, I dunno about you guys, but they sure were nice with the Christmas presents and Halloween candy from before! Phoenix: In other words, the only ones who have been enjoying themselves are you and Kay. Maya: Mainly because we tend to look on the more positive side of things. Franziska: It sounds like you’re simply deluding yourselves. Maya: See? That negative attitude has got to go! Lighten up already, guys! Speakers: Now that’s the spirit, Maya! If you spread that cheer around enough, we might even reward you with something nice! Maya: What, really? It’s “nice”…? Phoenix: *dryly* Wow, what are the chances? Speakers: Quite likely, if she tries hard enough. Gain enough of these hence dubbed “gratitude points” (“grats” for short), and you’ll be eligible to request to exchange attendance with someone of your choice! Phoenix: Wait, you’re serious!? Maya: Whoa! That does sound nice! Franziska: It sounds more like fraud! Just where are you going with this happy-go-lucky attitude? Speakers: If you must know, we want to do something different to commemorate the new year, so we, the Management, have formally decided to instate a new system of positive reinforcement! All: … Phoenix: You know, you’re kinda late on tha- Edgeworth: Where was that “decision” of yours when the kink meme attacked yet again!? Speakers: That’s none of my business. Edgeworth: You’re one of them! How is it not!? Speakers: Oh, please don’t take it the wrong way, Mr. Edgeworth. Communication may be a bit delayed at times. Edgeworth: Don’t avoid the question! Get things settled amongst yourselves sooner! Speakers: As for that New Year’s resolution thing… Phoenix: Huh? Didn’t you just say it? Speakers: Oh, no. That’s just a completely well-intentioned move on my part. Franziska: You’re the only one doing this!? Speakers: Hey, if it’s catchy enough, it might spread to the others too. Maya: So, what’s that resolution of yours? Speakers: Simple: to provide you all with more material than I managed last year, starting with this session. All: … Maya: …I shouldn’t have asked. Phoenix: (No, but something tells me they would have said it anyway…) Speakers: And speaking of which, we’re running a bit late! Time to get those seats filled! [And thus, the sporkers have been sent directly inside.] Speakers: Honestly, you could have done that already. [Oh… I thought it was tradition to have a chat outside in the lobby first.] Speakers: It’s a new year, man! Get with the times! [Er… yes, sir!] Spoiler: [The lights come on for our first intermission.] Speakers: Well, that passed by faster than I thought it’d take. These chapters have gotten rather short, haven’t they? Maya: Forget that! When do I get to exchange those grats I got? Speakers: We ARE in an intermission, missy. Go ahead. Maya: Sweet! I’m opting out for Apollo! Phoenix: What? Why Apollo? Maya: Because you said so yourself! You wanted to see him, didn’t you? Phoenix: Yeah, well… I didn’t really mean it as dragging him in here with me. Maya: Too bad you didn’t get the grats to get that choice! Later, guys! [Then, there’s a bright flash, and in her seat is now another fellow sporker.] Apollo: W-what the!? What am I doing here!? I wasn’t invited today! Phoenix: New policy. Anyone who gets these points the Management assigns gets to switch with someone. Speakers: They’re called “gratitude points”, but we call them “grats” for short! Apollo: …For a moment there, I thought Mr. Wright was kidding. Phoenix: I usually don’t do that with this solemn face. Speakers: Intermission over! Back to work. [And the lights dim again.] Spoiler: [The lights come back on… and what a shame. It seems Phoenix Wright is lying on the floor again, but is now actually unconscious.] Apollo: M-Mr. Wright! Mr. Wright, wake up! Phoenix: … Edgeworth: Well, Franziska… you did what you said. But we can’t leave him like this. Franziska: …Hmph. Very well, I suppose he deserves a rest in the infirmary. Management! *whips air* Speakers: Yeees…? Oh, dear. Has another bird fallen from grace… and reality? Franziska: Forget the metaphors! Send him away for treatment. Speakers: Hm? But he didn’t actually get enough grats to be sent away… Apollo: Are you serious right now!? He’s UNCONSCIOUS! Speakers: Yeesh, inside voices, please. Fine, he’ll get a break, but once he’s awake again, he’s coming back here. Narrator? [Yes, sir! And with another flash of light, Mr. Wright is sent away to the infirmary… which I didn’t realize we had until now.] Speakers: Renovations aren’t always obvious, you know. Anyway, there’s something more important to discuss right now. Apollo: And that is? Speakers: Ms. von Karma, you are eligible to exchange your spot. Franziska: W-what? You aren’t messing with me, are you? Speakers: Nope. While it’s normally a violation to injure a fellow sporker to that extent just now, I’ve decided to let it slide and award you another grat instead. Apollo: W-what!? How is that fair!? Speakers: I saw your malicious grins. You all asked for it. Therefore, the whipping that followed does count as “lightening up the mood” after that awful joke. Apollo: Uh… I can’t disagree with you about that… but this still doesn’t feel right. Speakers: When does it ever? Anyhow, Ms. von Karma, your choice? Franziska: …Hmm. I suppose this would be a good time to call him here again… Detective Scruffy. Apollo: Scruffy? Speakers: Excellent choice! Enjoy the rest of your day! [There’s another flash, and a familiar face has returned.] Gumshoe: Whoa, pal! Hey, what’s the big idea!? I wasn’t invited here this time! ...Oh, Mr. Edgeworth, sir! Edgeworth: Detective Gumshoe. (Figures… Franziska would turn to another of her victims…) Gumshoe: And you’re with… uh… who is this kid again? Apollo: Apollo Justice. I work for Mr. Wright. Gumshoe: Oh, yeah, that’s it! Man, what’s with Mr. Wright and his friends with their weird names? Apollo: (You’re one to talk!) Gumshoe: Let me tell ya, pal, Mr. Wright and I go a ways back! We’re rivals, you see? Why, I remember our first encounter… Speakers: Alright, we’ve spent long enough. Let’s get back to it. Spoiler: [The lights light up… but there’s still one more chapter to go!] Apollo: Still!? How long have we been here anyway!? Speakers: A good several hours. Think of it as a very long movie. Edgeworth: You weren’t exaggerating when you said you would provide us with “more material”… Speakers: I wouldn’t exaggerate about that. I’ve been really getting into the mood so far! It’s so enticing to see sporkers come and go… Edgeworth: Speaking of coming and going, how goes Wright? Apollo: Ack! (I can’t believe I almost forgot about him!) Gumshoe: Huh? What happened to Mr. Wright, sir? Speakers: He’s still asleep, or so the nurses say. But we could bring him back if you miss him already. Edgeworth: Hmph. Whether he’s back or not matters little to me. At least let him rest until he’s ready… Speakers: Well, I’d be glad to oblige you, Mr. Edgeworth! Narrator~! [Another flash fills the room, and Phoenix Wright falls into a nearby seat. The fall seems to have woken him.] Phoenix: Bwah!? …What? Oh, come on. I’m still here? Edgeworth: (…As usual, they didn’t listen to a word I said.) Phoenix: Detective Gumshoe? What are you doing here? Gumshoe: I just got zapped in here, pal. What happened to you? Phoenix: I got severely whipped… Gumshoe: Yeesh. You have my sympathies, pal. Say, where is Ms. von Karma? Edgeworth: Out. She exchanged her spot with you. Gumshoe: What!? She could do that!? Speakers: It’s a new policy I’ve instated. After every chapter we complete, we get to switch a character with another based on their choice. Apollo: Huh? But don’t we need those “grats” you keep talking about? Speakers: The grats have become obsolete. It’s a pain when none of the sporkers are as peppy as some others… Apollo: Geez… You’re the one who instated them in the first place! Speakers: Alright, it’s time for the final stretch. Brace yourselves, gentlemen! Spoiler: [And finally, the lights turn back on for the last time! An exasperated sigh of relief sweeps through the room… even from the speakers.] Phoenix: What are YOU sighing about? Speakers: I’ve never sat around here for so long before. It’s tiring. Edgeworth: Perhaps you should have considered that before you trapped us in here. Speakers: But you guys provide so much entertainment, I just couldn’t leave! What if I missed something? I can’t trust you guys to tell me! Phoenix: And whose fault is that? Speakers: Yours, duh. Phoenix: (You little…) Gumshoe: At least it’s all over, pals! Sure, the fic was bad as usual, but at least we survived! Edgeworth: Speak for yourself. You only stayed for one chapter. I had to stay for the entire session! Phoenix: So did I. Edgeworth: You were in the infirmary for a chapter. Phoenix: Yeah, because I lost consciousness! And she’s not even here to apologize… Edgeworth: To be fair, she was the one who told the management to send you away. Phoenix: Huh? Are we talking about the same person? Apollo: Yeah, it kinda surprised me too. Phoenix: …Was it that much of a shock? Apollo: I didn’t needlessly shout, if you must know! Speakers: What are you talking about? You yelled at me. Apollo: That’s completely different, and was what you deserved anyway. Speakers: You all are so mean… but that’s what I love about you. Phoenix: (Masochistic management confirmed?) Speakers: Alright, get out of here, ya needy keeblers. I need to clean up here and I don’t want anyone wandering around while I’m not looking! Apollo: (What in the world happened in there!? No, wait, I don’t want to know.) [Our exhausted sporkers gladly take their long-awaited leave. And here we end another wonderful sporking in the Sporking Theater! We hope you enjoyed this long read, and please stay tuned for the next one! Have a pleasant day and the next, everyone!] Speakers: …Narrator? Have you seen where the Lego box went? [Um… it should be with you in the surveillance room, sir.] Speakers: Ah, here we go. I probably shouldn’t have used it as a Frisbee… |
Author: | AireyVerkhovensky [ Fri Jan 15, 2016 2:33 am ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
I feel like I've said this before, but: I honestly don't remember what was going on in the fic, and I honestly don't think it matters. I did burst out laughing at "a horde of horses" though. And I love the 'grats' thing and will probably follow suit/bring them back, with of course some insanely loophole-ridden make-em-up-as-you-go-along 'official' rules... Oh, and the phrase "A disgusting sight even for a Texan." will probably be stolen by me sometime in the near future. Can't say what context, though. Maybe I should take a chapter of The Hellspawn sometime. It does, after all, have a few certain similarities to a fic I wrote with my brother two years ago, so maybe the Management can gain a unique perspective on it? (Unless that comment just makes someone want to check out the fic I'm responsible for. It's in the fanfiction link in my signature, and I think you'll know which one it is just by looking at the summary... of course, anything I publish is always up for grabs in the sporking theatre, because I mostly deal in crack, www) In-character Klavier, huh? I'm actually kind of hoping he'll be the Only Sane Man for the rest of the fic, and basically spork it from the inside. Quote: Apollo: Um, sorry to break up your conversation, but Mr. Wright hasn’t gotten back into his seat yet… Franziska: He’s fine. Apollo: You sure? Edgeworth: Wright, get back in your seat. She’s not even whipping you anymore. Phoenix: …That’s no guarantee for later, but fine… Apollo: Mr. Wright, why were you just lying there? Phoenix: I needed a moment. A+ And poor Phoenix. Poor Gumshoe. Also also, I don't think I've ever not cracked up at Pearl swearing. "Watch your fucking language" killed me. Goodbye. Like the judge killed by genderbending. I know I should post a sporking sometime, but I've been really busy lately... writing, editing Great sporking as usual, Rubia~! Edit: 50 pages! Wow! And to think I started posting here on page five, a year and a half ago... |
Author: | cuteyounggirlplus [ Fri Jan 15, 2016 2:42 am ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
@Rubia I really enjoyed this sporking except for two things: First, could you please not use the r-word? It's a slur. Second, I think at least Phoenix should have picked up on Rose's mom's identity. The author wasn't very subtle. |
Author: | AireyVerkhovensky [ Fri Jan 15, 2016 2:47 am ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
cuteyounggirlplus wrote: @Rubia I really enjoyed this sporking except for two things: First, could you please not use the r-word? It's a slur. Second, I think at least Phoenix should have picked up on Rose's mom's identity. The author wasn't very subtle. Shouldn't it be fine in this context, though? It wasn't be used as a pejorative. (I don't mean to start a debate, I'm just wondering where the line is drawn.) |
Author: | cuteyounggirlplus [ Fri Jan 15, 2016 2:52 am ] |
Post subject: | Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction! |
Technically the more PC term is "mentally disabled". |
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