It was 8am, and Phoenix Wright’s alarm clock was set to go off. But it didn’t, because it had run out of batteries.

Kristoph smirked to himself thinking of the little forgery setup he had arranged for the lawyer who had taken over his case. The phone rang suddenly, making him jump. He answered it.
‘Mr Gavin, we need you to take the trial.’
The smile was wiped right off of his face.

The trial was practically over by the time Phoenix got to court, still half asleep. As he got into the lobby, Kristoph Gavin suddenly rushed past him, and ran out of the door, followed by security guards. He peered into the courtroom to see Klavier Gavin at the prosecution bench, his head in his hands, and the judge looking bewildered as usual.
There was a small girl waiting in the defendant’s lobby.

Trucy came home with Phoenix. They tried to get into a routine, and live their lives together, but it didn’t work out – Phoenix just wasn’t made to be a father. One morning he awoke to find the house empty, and a small note written in scruffy childlike writing on the kitchen table.
‘Pappa feenicks – i has join the circus for to do sum magic. The peepul is much nicerer to me ther. I hop you isn’t too sad on yor owne. Luve Trucy X X X
Phoenix held the note in his hands.
‘Trucy,’ he whispered, I’ll never let this note go…’
Then he noticed the huge stack of bills on the doormat, and dropped the note onto the floor.

It wasn’t long before Phoenix got thrown out of his flat. But he had a backup plan – the Wright & Co Law Offices. After all, he could easily live and work in the same place – it wasn’t like he did much work nowadays anyway. He went to the office for the first time in ages, and realised it was actually pretty big and had several bedrooms. So he unpacked, and settled into his new home.

It was only a matter of time before Maya and Pearl turned up. They were pretty fed up of Kurain – after all, Fey Manor was probably the most boring place in the universe. So Phoenix couldn’t really turn them down. Plus he wanted to get a girlfriend, so he thought it would be convenient if he lived with Maya.
‘Thank you so much, Phoenix!’ Maya cried as soon as he agreed, ‘This place is sooo much better than Fey Manor!’
‘I know…’ said Phoenix, remembering his last visit to the manor; a whole week of intense boredom.
‘It’s good you two can be with each other again! After all, you are each other’s Special Someone!’ said Pearl gleefully. Phoenix grinned goofily; Maya looked like she might be sick.

A few days later, Ema turned up on the doorstep with a load of bags.
‘Hi Phoenix. I’m coming to live here for the foreseeable future, hope you don’t mind! Scientifically speaking, I won’t take up too much space!’
And with that, she barged into the house, picked a bedroom, and unpacked her things. Within ten minutes the room was transformed into a mini laboratory.
‘Um… is all that equipment necessary?’ Phoenix asked, a little scared of the strange machines and chemicals which filled the small room.
‘Yes! I need it for my research!’ Ema said forcefully. Phoenix was about to ask what exactly this ‘research’ was, but he was put off by the way she was glaring at him, so he decided to leave her alone in her little land of science, and went to eat a sandwich.

Phoenix was settling into his new life with Maya (who was oblivious to his lousy flirting techniques), Pearl (who Phoenix had bribed to do all the housework) and Ema (who seemed to have gotten a job at the police station, but hadn’t actually gone to work yet). But you are probably wondering what happened to everyone else.
Edgeworth still worked as a prosecutor, and mostly hung around in his garish car in the parking lot, trying to look cool. Franziska worked there too, of course, and mainly whipped people all day. Iris was just finishing her sentence in prison, longing to see her darling Feenie again. Godot had somehow gotten out of prison, and nobody knew or particularly cared what where he had gone. Mia was dead, as usual. Detective Gumshoe was still working at the police department, struggling to pay his bills. And Larry… well…

The doorbell rang, just as Phoenix was tucking into a bowl of alphabetti spaghetti.
‘Oh great, now it’s gonna go cold!’ he moaned.
‘Just answer the stupid door, Nick!’ Maya yelled. Phoenix opened the front door, and Larry burst in.
‘He-llo there, my babes! How’s it hanging, Nick? Lookin’ good there!’ he said saucily, stroking Phoenix’s chest. Phoenix backed away nervously, and Larry pushed past into the kitchen.
‘Maya, Pearl, my gorgeous girls, we should go shopping some time! Ooh la la, sexy kitchen, Nick!’
Larry turned to Phoenix and winked at him. Phoenix gulped, realising with discomfort that he could see Larry’s nipples through his T-shirt, and his jeans were a little too tight in certain places.
‘Um… Larry, we’re kinda busy right now. Why don’t you… er… leave?’ Phoenix stuttered.
‘Gosh, is that the time?’ said Larry, in an increasingly gay voice, ‘Soz my darlings, I have to go – I’ve got a hot date!’
Phoenix quickly guided Larry to the door, ignoring as Larry blew him a kiss goodbye.
‘Phew!’ He breathed a huge sigh of relief as soon as he’d shut the front door.
‘Why was that man so… funny?’ asked Pearl.
Maya chose to ignore her question. ‘Well, he’s certainly… changed,’ she said.
Phoenix stayed silent, still a little shaken up by the whole incident, and sat down to eat his lukewarm alphabetti spaghetti.

Time went by. Phoenix didn’t do much work at all – in fact, he did none. He became so lazy that he even wanted Pearl to flush the toilet for him, although Maya forced him to flush it himself.
‘If only something would encourage him to work again…’ said Maya anxiously, worried that they would get chucked out of the office if Phoenix didn’t pay the bills, ‘What if we have to go back to Fey Manor!?’
‘Urgh… Fey Manor!’ Ema shuddered, ‘Well, it’s my first day of work at the police station today, so I’ll be making some money. And Phoenix could go and see Edgeworth – maybe he’ll get inspired to fight for justice again?’
‘Hmm… perhaps…’ said Maya doubtfully.

Ema left for work shortly after this conversation, and Maya persuaded Phoenix to visit Edgeworth later. Phoenix agreed, mainly because he wanted to gossip with him about Larry.
Edgeworth was in his car, looking shady.
‘Hey, Edgy! What are you doing in there?’ Phoenix called.
‘Shhh! You’re cramping my style!’ Edgeworth hissed, beckoning Phoenix over to the car.
‘Oh… sorry. So, have you seen Larry lately?’
‘Only a glimpse, but I heard he came to the office wanting to see me. That’s the main reason I hardly ever leave my car nowadays – I’m hoping he won’t find me.’
‘Oh… right,’ said Phoenix, ‘So… er… shall I go home now?’
‘Yeah, whatever,’ said Edgeworth, winding up the window. Phoenix turned to leave, when Edgeworth called out to him. ‘Wright! Wait, there’s something I need to tell you!’
‘Huh? What?’ Phoenix said, turning around.
‘Oh, just a little something you should know… Ema’s been murdered.’
‘WHAAAAAT!?’ Phoenix exclaimed, ‘But who where what when why?’
‘I’m not telling you any more,’ said Edgeworth, ‘It’s more entertaining to watch you struggling to find things out for yourself.’
‘Oh, I see,’ said Phoenix, ‘But isn’t there any way you can help me? At all?’
‘Well… you can have this manky old newspaper. I was planning to use it to wallpaper my car, but I guess you can have it.’
‘Erm… thanks…’ Phoenix took the newspaper and shoved it in his pocket.
‘Are you leaving yet?’
‘Not until you help me some more!’
‘Fine, if you’re not going to leave me alone, I’ll just leave YOU alone!’ Edgeworth drove to the other side of the parking lot.
‘Oh great. He’s really outwitted me,’ said Phoenix, ‘Well, I guess I’d better go to the detention centre!’

At the detention centre, Phoenix spotted a familiar face – Detective Gumshoe!
‘You!’ Phoenix yelled, ‘You killed her, didn’t you!?’
‘I didn’t kill anybody, pal!’ said Gumshoe sadly, ‘But… they think I did it! Please, defend me, pal… you’re my only hope!’
Phoenix sighed. ‘Why do I always get stuck defending everyone?’
‘Please! Nobody else wants to take my case!’ Detective Gumshoe begged.
‘Fine, fine, I’ll defend you. But you actually have to pay me, OK?’
‘Ok, I promise,’ said Gumshoe, with his fingers crossed behind his back.

Phoenix dragged Maya along with him to investigate. The crime scene was an alleyway round the back of Criminal Affairs. When they arrived they found that someone was already there – someone with two tall spikes of hair and a red waistcoat.
‘Apollo Justice!?’ said Phoenix, ‘Weren’t you that kid who wanted to become a lawyer?’
‘Yes, I was,’ Apollo snarled, ‘But since Kristoph Gavin was on the run from the law for forging evidence, I couldn’t find a decent lawyer to take me on!’
‘I would have taken you on, Apollo!’ said Phoenix.
‘I said a ‘decent’ lawyer,’ Apollo growled, ‘Anyway, it’s too late, I’m already a detective, and this is my crime scene.’
‘Well, let’s investigate!’ said Maya, dragging Phoenix away from Apollo. It seemed that the body wasn’t here, but they managed to find some other seemingly useless evidence, including a smashed piece of clay shaped like a certain part of a woman’s chest.
‘Hmm, this looks strangely familiar…’ said Phoenix, examining it closely.
‘Well, I think we all know what it’s supposed to be…’ said Maya.
‘Hmm… but there’s still something familiar…’ Phoenix said, viewing it from all angles.
‘Come on, let’s get to the place where the body was disposed of!’ said Maya, snatching the clay model out of his hands and shoving it away into her bag.

The police believed that the body had been disposed of in a river, and washed up on an island in the middle. However, they couldn’t get to the island as the currents were too strong.
At the riverbank, Maya and Phoenix felt the pain of a familiar whip striking them.
‘F-franziska von Karma!’ Phoenix stuttered, rubbing his sore back where the whip had hit him.
‘Yes, it is I, the prodigy. And you, Phoenix Wright, will battle me in court tomorrow!’
‘Oh great…’ Phoenix moaned, ‘Of all the prosecutors it could have been…!’
They gathered more evidence by the river, and headed back to the office to prepare for the trial. However, it seemed difficult to prove anything using the evidence they had collected.
‘I sure hope this junk comes in useful…’ Phoenix mumbled, with a sinking feeling that it wouldn’t help him at all.

The next morning, Phoenix actually got to the courtroom on time, thanks to Maya waking him up and forcing him to get dressed.
‘Can I stand next to you in the trial, Phoenix?’ she asked, as they stood waiting in the defendant’s lobby, pretty much ignoring Detective Gumshoe who was sobbing in the corner.
‘Sure you can, Maya,’ said Phoenix, ‘As if I’d want anyone else stood next to me!’
Suddenly the doors burst open, and Iris walked in.
‘Hey, Feenie!’ she cried, running forward and wrapping her arms around him.
‘Oh, hi Iris!’ Phoenix said, blushing, ‘Shouldn’t you be in prison?’
‘I just got let out, and I’m staying with Larry… unfortunately. Although… IF I had somewhere else to stay, it would be quite lovely, don’t you think so, Feenie?’ she said sweetly.
‘Yeah… hey, I know! You can stay with me!’ Phoenix said, grinning at his brilliant idea, not realising that Iris had been hinting this all along.
‘Oh, wow, really? Feenie, you are so kind! I’d love to move in with you!’
‘Well, it’s nothing really… I have a lot of space in the office, after all…!’ he said, still blushing bright red.
‘Oh, and Feenie? Can I stand next to you for the trial? I’d just love to see you in action!’
‘Sure you can, Iris,’ said Phoenix, ‘As if I’d want anyone else stood next to me!’
Maya glared at him, coughing meaningfully, but he didn’t notice as he was so absorbed with Iris in his arms.
Then the doors flung open again, and another woman came in – somebody dressed in Pearl’s clothes, with Pearl’s hairstyle, but a lot taller and curvier than Pearl.
‘Sis!’ said Maya, running to hug her sister, but Mia ignored her.
‘Hello, Phoenix,’ she said flirtily. Phoenix pushed Iris to one side, going even redder than anyone could have thought was possible.
‘M-Mia!’ he gasped, laughing goofily.
‘I knew you’d need my help in the trial… mind if I stand at the defence bench with you?’
‘Sure you can!’ said Phoenix, ‘As if I’d want anyone else stood next to me!’
Iris and Maya both glared at him this time, but he only had eyes for Mia.

The defence bench was a lot more crowded than usual; Phoenix stood to the right, with Mia stood close next to him, Iris behind her, trying to peer round at Phoenix, and Maya at the back, looking moody.
‘Order! Order!’ yelled the judge, slamming down his gavel. He stared down at the three women clustered around Phoenix. ‘Mr Wright… is the defence… ready?’
‘Yes, your honour!’ said Phoenix, grinning at his three female assistance. Mia winked at him; Iris batted her eyelashes; Maya glared icily.
With a loud cracking sound, Franziska’s whip lashed over all four of them.
‘Can we please get on with this trial!?’ she said.
‘Yes, yes, let’s proceed!’ said the judge hastily, secretly wishing that he had three gorgeous girls next to him.

The trial went on as usual; the witnesses were all lying, Phoenix got into a few tight spots, and Franziska’s whip seemed to slash someone every few seconds. Phoenix managed to use most of the evidence to his advantage – in fact, even the old newspaper from Edgeworth came in handy. There was an article on the front page about a flood in a clothing shop, and Phoenix managed to prove that the body in the river may not be a body at all; it could just be a washed up mannequin.
‘Utter foolishness!’ yelled Franziska, as Phoenix tried to argue his point, ‘I demand that we ignore the defence’s foolish ideas!’
But the judge slammed down his gavel, and extended the trial to another day.

‘Oh, Feenie! You were brilliant!’ Iris gasped as they all went out into the defendant’s lobby.
‘Yeah, thanks pa-’ Gumshoe began, only to be interrupted by Iris.
‘The way you pointed your finger, Feenie, you looked so handsome! And the way you-’
This time, Maya interrupted. ‘But Nick… if the ‘body’ isn’t really a body, how do we know Ema is even dead!?’
‘Don’t be silly, Maya, of course she’s dead – the police said so!’
‘But I can’t sense her spirit…’ said Maya anxiously.
‘Maya, that spirit channelling stuff is a load of mumbo-jumbo’ said Mia, ‘Nobody cares!’
‘But Mia… you’re being channelled right now! It’s crazy for you not to believe in spirit channelling!’ Maya said in shock.
‘Nah, spirits aren’t real. All that matters is fashion, fame, and material possessions!’ Mia said firmly.
‘Since when did you become so shallow?’ Maya muttered under her breath.
‘Hey, Feenie, what’s this strange broken statue?’ Iris asked, picking up the piece of broken clay which he and Maya had found in the alleyway.
‘Dunno… wait a second, give that here!’ he snatched it out of Iris’s hand, then held it up against Mia, ‘It’s a perfect replica!’
Mia didn’t seem to notice Phoenix’s sudden outburst. ‘Well, I need to go back to the spirit world now. Not that I believe in that kind of thing…’
She faded away, leaving Pearl in her place.
‘Hello, Mr Nick! What is that you are holding? It looks like a lady’s-’
‘Shush, Pearly – let’s go back to the office.’ Maya snapped, ‘Oh, and put that thing away, Nick!’
‘Um… aren’t you going to say anything to me, pal?’ Gumshoe sad sadly as they left him alone in the lobby.

Back at home, Iris seemed keen to move in straight away, but Maya persuaded Phoenix that they really needed to get on and investigate before sorting out Iris’s living arrangements.
‘So… we know that someone probably made a naked clay statue of Mia,’ said Maya, trying not to feel too disgusted by this, ‘Do you have any idea who it was?’
‘Hmm… could have been anyone. I mean, I’d certainly like a naked statue of her!’ said Phoenix. Maya sighed deeply.
‘How about Godot?’ she suggested, ‘After all, he IS her long lost boyfriend. Maybe he knows something! Although I’m not sure what it has to do with Ema…’

They found out that Godot was living in a flat not far away. They caught a taxi there, and soon they were outside his door.
Maya rang the doorbell, and they heard a lot of banging, before the door eventually opened. Godot stood in front of them. His hair was black, he wore a red shirt instead of green, and his mask was gone.
‘Mr Godot?’ said Maya, shocked by his strangely normal-looking appearance.
‘Actually, it’s Diego,’ he said, ‘So, what brings you here?’
‘Erm… do you mind if we come in?’ said Phoenix.
‘Sure, I don’t see why not…’ Diego led them into a modern looking living room, with a long row of cupboards along one wall, and a huge silver coffee maker in the corner.
‘Please, sit down’ said Diego politely. They sat on his shiny leather sofa, and he made himself a steaming cup of coffee.
‘So, what brings you here?’ he asked, taking a sip.
‘Well, we wanted to talk to you about a murder case,’ Phoenix explained, ‘A certain case… involving Ema Skye.’
Diego’s eyes widened. He opened his mouth to speak, when they heard the sound of an explosion coming from another room.
‘I’d better go and see what that was,’ said Diego, quickly getting up, ‘Please don’t touch anything…’

As soon as he’d left, Maya stood up. ‘Let’s take a look around!’ she said, rummaging through a pile of papers on Diego’s coffee table.
‘Maya! He told us not to touch anything!’ Phoenix gasped. She ignored him and carried on searching for clues. ‘Fine, fine, I give in!’ he said after a few seconds.
He got up and looked around the room. There was a sleek silver laptop lying on an armchair. Maya walked over to it and opened it up. On the screen was some kind of plan; it looked like a very complicated machine. The laptop was connected to a printer, so she pressed print.
‘What are you doing?’ Phoenix asked. She showed him the copy of the plans which she had printed out. ‘Look at this! I think he’s planning to build something… something big!’
Phoenix quickly put the sheet of paper into his bag, then spotted something small and round on the floor by the cupboards.
‘I’m sure that wasn’t there a minute ago…’ he mumbled, picking it up. ‘Hey, Maya! Look at this!’
‘It’s… Ema’s badge!’ she gasped, ‘But what is it doing here?’
They both nearly jumped out of their skin when they heard footsteps approaching. Phoenix shoved the badge into his pocket, and they sat down on the sofa.
‘Hmm… I’m a little busy right now,’ said Diego, ‘I think it’s time you left!’
He hurried them out of the door, slamming it shut behind them.
‘Well, I think we have some new evidence… and a new suspect!’ said Phoenix, ‘I can’t wait for the trial tomorrow!’

Iris showed up at the courtroom again, much to Maya’s annoyance.
‘Shall I channel Mystic Mia?’ asked Pearl in her sweet, innocent voice.
‘Pearly – I’ll buy you some sweets if you don’t channel her!’ Maya whispered, feeling fed up of seeing Mia. Pearl nodded.
‘Is there any hope for me in the trial today, pal?’ Gumshoe asked. Everyone ignored him.
‘Feenie, I’m sure you’ll be fantastic today!’ Iris said, hugging Phoenix tightly.
‘Heh heh heh… I’m sure I will!’ he said, his face flushed pink.
‘Come on, Nick, let’s get into the courtroom,’ said Maya sharply, feeling strangely jealous at the sight of him hugging Iris.

‘The prosecution calls its first witness, Mr Diego Armando to the stand!’ Franziska declared.
‘Very well,’ said the Judge, ‘Could Mr Armando please take the stand?’
‘Mr Armando? Who is he?’ said Phoenix.
‘You idiot! It’s Godot!’ said Maya.
‘Ohhhh!’ said Phoenix, ‘I knew I’d heard that name somewhere before!’
Maya rolled her eyes.
Diego claimed to have seen Detective Gumshoe disposing of the body. Strangely, Franziska appeared to be extra nice to him, and didn’t whip him once as he testified. Then the cross examination began.
‘Come on, Phoenix – this is your chance to catch him out!’ said Maya, her eyes full of determination.
‘You can do it, Feenie!’ Iris said, quickly kissing him on the cheek.
‘Ok… here goes nothing!’ said Phoenix...

Franziska slammed her fist down on the desk in fury. ‘Your Honour… the defence is clearly foolish! Ignore him!’
‘OBJECTION!’ Phoenix yelled, his arm outstretched, ‘Franziska von Karma! You can’t deny that Mr Armando’s testimony was full of holes!’
‘Am I correct in thinking that you are… accusing Mr Armando of murdering Ema Skye?’ said the judge.
‘Yes, that’s exactly what I’m doing!’ Phoenix said forcefully, ‘Look! I found this badge – belonging to Ema Skye – inside his flat!’
‘The foolish words of a foolish fool! What motive could he possibly have for killing Ema Skye!?’ Franziska said.
‘Phoenix… take a look at all the evidence, I think the answer is in there somewhere!’ Maya said.
‘Feenie, just listen to your heart!’ Iris said, clinging onto Phoenix’s arm.
‘Ok, thanks for the advice, Iris!’ said Phoenix, examining all the evidence he had. The paper with the machine plans on it caught his eye.
‘Aha!’ he said, ‘TAKE THAT!’
‘What is this foolish scrap of fool’s paper?’ Franziska asked, whipping the Judge.
‘Mr Armando! You were planning to make this machine… am I correct?’
‘Yes, that is correct!’ said Diego, smiling slyly.
‘And you needed Ema Skye for it, correct?’
‘Yep!’
‘So you killed her and used her body parts to make this mysterious machine!’
Diego sighed. ‘Well, I guess that’s close enough… I think it is time!’ He pulled out a walkie-talkie. ‘Ema! Bring in the machine!’

The courtroom doors swung open, and Ema wheeled in a scary-looking machine.
‘See? I told you she was still alive!’ Maya hissed.
‘Isn’t that the victim!?’ the judge gasped, completely puzzled.
‘Shut up, old man, I’m about to display my machine!’ said Diego, helping Ema move it into the centre of the courtroom.
‘But… I don’t get it! Why isn’t Ema dead?’ said Phoenix.
‘Fine, fine, I guess I’ll explain first before showing you my miraculous invention…’ said Diego, ‘Are you all sitting comfortably? Then I’ll begin my story…’

‘When I got out of prison, my life was pretty much perfect… I had a home, plenty of money, and no one seemed to care that I was a murderer. But there was one thing missing…’
‘Was it my sister, Mia?’ Maya interrupted.
‘No! I’m talking about my good looks, of course!’ said Diego, ‘I still had white hair and that hideous mask on my face! So I became an inventor, and made a fantastic machine to restore my eyesight to normal. And I also dyed my hair.’
‘Is…that that whole story?’ said the Judge.
‘No offence, but this whole ‘inventing’ thing is kind of hard to believe…’ said Phoenix.
‘Shut up, Trite! My story’s not done yet!’
‘Then carry on already!’ said Franziska impatiently, whipping Phoenix.
‘So, I was handsome once again… but something else was missing!’
‘Was it something to do with your appearance?’ Maya interrupted again.
‘No! Stop interrupting! The thing that was missing was… my darling Mia! So I planned another incredible machine to resurrect her from the dead, and I kidnapped Ema to help me!’
‘Resurrect her… from the dead? But that’s impossible!’ the Judge said.
‘I HAVEN’T FINISHED MY STORY YET; DO NOT INTERRUPT ME WHILE I AM SPEAKING!!!’ Diego shouted, ‘Anyway, as soon as Ema knew it would be a great scientific achievement, she was eager to help. But I wanted to have a big audience for my brilliant invention, so I set up a fake murder and false clues to gather your attention… and now the whole courtroom can see my spectacular machine in action!’

Everyone sat there in stunned silence.
‘You mean… I got arrested for nothing!?’ Gumshoe said. Everyone ignored him.
‘So you planted all these clues? Even this broken statue?’ Phoenix asked, holding up the piece of clay which looked exactly like a certain part of Mia.
‘Yes. I knew that you would make the connection with Mia… since she’s always wearing ridiculously revealing clothing when people channel her. And I was pretty sure that you would come and visit me. I knew that if I told you not to touch anything, you would definitely take a look around. I told Ema to hide in the cupboard and drop her badge on the floor, and I made sure the plans for the machine were displayed on the laptop and there was a printer ready so you could print them off.’
‘Wow!’ said Maya, ‘I can’t believe you planned all this! But was it really worth the effort?’
‘Of course! Because you are now going to witness the most incredible event in the history of mankind… I will bring the dead back to life!!!’

The machine was huge and silver, with a platform in the middle surrounded by what looked like guns. There was a control pad crammed with complicated levers and buttons, which Ema was crouched down next to with her pink glasses pulled down over her eyes.
‘Is it ready, Ema?’ Diego asked, watching as she flicked several different switches and pressed some buttons.
‘Yes, I think so!’ she said excitedly, her eyes shining behind the pink lenses of her glasses, ‘This is so incredible – an amazing feat of science!’
‘Hmm, where’s that guy I ordered to do a drum roll?’ said Diego, looking around the courtroom.
‘Right here!’ said a man, rushing up with a drum hung around his neck.
‘Ok! Fire up the machine, Ema!’ Diego instructed. Ema took a deep breath and pulled a large red lever. The machine started to whir and bleep, and the man with the drum started playing a drum roll. Everyone was silent.

It all happened suddenly. The guns fired out bright red beams of light, meeting in the centre to form a white sphere. Then a huge bolt of blue light shot down from above, landing on the machine. A silhouette formed, engulfed in an orb of blue light. The machine fell silent, and the light flickered away, leaving Mia lying in the middle of the platform.
‘M-Mia!’ Diego cried, rushing forwards to help her to her feet.
She looked down at herself, and laughed. ‘Diego, trust you to bring me back to life with no clothes on!’ She flung her arms around him, and they stood on the machine, hugging each other tightly, not seeming to care that she was totally naked.
‘Scientifically speaking, that was… wow!’ Ema squealed. Then she spotted Maya and rushed over to her.
‘Sorry if I worried you all,’ she said, ‘It’s just that Diego wanted this to be really spectacular, and he thought that a fake murder would be a good way to attract an audience.’
‘It’s OK, I’m just glad you’re alive… and so is my sis!’ said Maya.
Phoenix was still speechless, ogling at Mia. Iris quickly put a hand over his eyes.
‘Aww, Iris! Why d’you have to spoil my view?’
‘Feenie, you don’t need to look at HER! Why don’t you look at me instead?’
‘But… you have clothes on!’ he said, ‘Where’s the fun in that?’ Iris sighed, keeping her hand firmly pressed over his eyes.

Diego and Mia were still in the middle of the courtroom, now kissing passionately. Franziska stared at them in disgust, then whipped the judge. ‘Your Honour! Surely you cannot accept this foolishly indecent behaviour?’ she yelled.
The judge paused to observe Mia for a moment longer, then took off his long black robe and threw it to her. ‘Here, Madam, you can use this to… cover yourself up!’
Mia detached herself from Diego, and tossed the baggy robe over her head. ‘Hmm… it’s not very revealing, is it?’ she sighed.
‘Don’t worry, I’ll buy you all the revealing clothes you want, kitten!’ said Diego, smiling happily at her.
‘Come on, then! Let’s go shopping!’ she said, tugging at Diego’s sleeve.
‘Wait, sis! Aren’t you happy to see me?’ said Maya, with tears in her eyes.
‘Well, I saw you yesterday!’ Mia said, ‘Can’t I spend some time with my darling boyfriend right now?’
‘Why don’t you both come to the office for a drink?’ offered Phoenix, eager to spend more time with Mia.
‘Fine, fine, as long as you have coffee!’ said Diego, ‘And one of you can lend Mia some clothes that are less hideous than this huge black circus tent!’
‘Oi! That’s my robes you’re talking about!’ said the judge.
‘Whatever… let’s go!’ Diego said, walking out of the courtroom with his arm around Mia, followed by Phoenix, Maya, Pearl, Iris and Ema.

It was a warm, sunny afternoon, so they decided to walk home.
‘Hey, Diego? Will you pay for me to have some plastic surgery?’ Mia asked.
‘Um… what kind of surgery?’
‘Just, you know, to give me a perfect figure,’ Mia said, ‘I haven’t had any for ages!’
‘Mia! You mean you’ve had surgery before!?’ Maya exclaimed.
‘Of course I have! Hasn’t everyone had a little cosmetic surgery at some time in their life?’
‘N-no…’ said Maya worriedly.
‘Me neither – scientifically speaking, it’s not good for you,’ said Ema.
‘Neither have I!’ said Iris, ‘But you like me just the way I am, right Feenie?’
‘Hmm… a little surgery never hurt anyone…’ mumbled Phoenix, still looking at Mia.
‘What is coz-meh-tick sur-ja-ree? Do I need some?’ asked Pearl curiously.
‘Oh, it’s just something for vain people,’ said Maya coldly, ‘But don’t worry Pearl, you really don’t need any!!’

Back at the office, Diego set up a ‘Welcome Back’ party for Mia. Detective Gumshoe turned up, wanting to thank Phoenix for defending him, but ended up staying for the party. Phoenix phoned up Edgeworth, who came along with Franziska. Larry also somehow found out about the party, and arrived as well.
‘Hey guyyyyyyys!’ he shrieked, ‘Mia, babes! Lookin’ good! Give us a kiss, darlin’!
Larry flounced up to Mia and gave her an air kiss on both cheeks.
‘Thanks, Larry…’ she said, giving him a weird look. She turned to Phoenix. ‘Did he always used to be so… gay?’ she whispered.
‘Probably. To be honest I can’t remember!’ said Phoenix. Iris popped up behind him.
‘Feenie! Ooh look, I really love this song!’ she said, quickly reaching over to the stereo to put on a soppy love song, ‘Perfect for dancing, don’t you think?’
‘Yeah! Hey Mia, do you wanna dance with me?’ Phoenix called.
‘Yes, I’d love to dance with you!’ said Iris, dragging him into the middle of the living room where several other random people were dancing. ‘You know Feenie, wasn’t it sooooo lovely when I used to be your girlfriend?’
‘Um… didn’t you try to kill me?’ Phoenix said.
‘No, no! That was Dahlia, silly! Oh Feenie, you’re so funny!’
‘Hmm… was she that ugly ginger one who was my girlfriend for several months?’
‘Hehehe, you’re such a joker Feenie. That was actually me in disguise as Dahlia, of course!’
‘Oh, right…’ said Phoenix, not really listening, as he was eying up the other girls in the room. Franziska was dancing with Edgeworth, Ema was with Detective Gumshoe (who seemed to be crushing her toes a lot), Mia was snogging Diego in the corner, and Maya was skipping around with Pearl. It seemed that none of them were keen to be Phoenix’s girlfriend…
‘Hey, Iris! I’ve thought of something really funny…’ he said.
‘Ooh, Feenie, what is it?’
‘Well… you know how you have no boyfriend, and I have no girlfriend? Well, wouldn’t it be hilarious if we started going out with each other? Hahaha!’
‘Oh, Feenie, you’re so clever! That would be a great idea!’
‘Yes! I have a girlfriend at last!’ Phoenix yelled, so loudly that everyone turned to stare.
‘That’s right, Feenie and I are a couple now!’ said Iris, staring lovingly into Phoenix’s eyes.
‘Congratulations…’ said Maya unenthusiastically.

Over the next month, Mia moved into Diego’s flat, had some plastic surgery in certain places, and persuaded Diego to buy her all sorts of expensive and revealing outfits, as well as a pair of pink shoes with ridiculously high heels, which she decided to wear every single day. She vowed that she wouldn’t do any more work (which she now called the ‘W word’) and would devote her life to being fashionable and looking gorgeous.
One morning, Diego was drinking coffee in the kitchen when Mia emerged from the bathroom, having just put on her fake tan, wearing an extremely low-cut top and a very short skirt.
‘Hey, kitten, I thought maybe we would go out somewhere today,’ he said.
‘What, you mean like to the shopping centre or the beauty salon?’
‘No, I was thinking we could go and visit Marvin Grossberg, since we both used to work there.’
‘Oh,’ said Mia, disappointed, ‘But that would remind me of when I used to do the ‘W word’!!!’
‘But don’t you want to visit him? Just for old time’s sake? I promise there will be no work involved!’
‘Fine, fine,’ she said moodily, ‘I guess it won’t hurt just to pay him a little visit…’

Grossberg’s office looked the same as ever, and so did he, wearing his same old hideous brown suit.
‘Why, hello there! Mr Armando, I remember you! Finest lawyer this office has ever seen… apart from myself, of course!’
‘Yes, I was a pretty good lawyer…’ said Diego, grinning smugly.
‘And you…’ said Grossberg, looking at Mia, ‘You’re Mia’s… something, are you not?’
‘Actually, I’m Mia,’ she said, ‘I recently came back to life, so I’ve come to visit you!’
‘Hmmm… seeing you two reminds me of the good old days… ah, the days of my youth… like the scent of fresh lemon, you see…’
‘Um… yeah…’ said Diego, starting to wish he hadn’t come to visit his old boss, as he’d forgotten how annoying he was.
‘Well, can I get either of you a drink?’ he said.
‘I’ll have a slimming milkshake,’ said Mia, ‘And Diego wants a coffee, with lots and lots of milk!’
‘Hey! You know I hate coffee with milk!’ said Diego, poking her playfully, ‘I’ll have a black coffee, Mr G.’
‘Alright. Danny!’ Grossberg called. A young man in a suit came running into the room.
‘Yes, Mr Grossberg?’ he said.
‘Fetch us a black coffee, a slimming milkshake, and a cup of lemon-scented tea, please!’ Grossberg ordered.
‘Um… I don’t think we have any coffee,’ said Danny.
‘How come you have slimming milkshakes here but no coffee!?’ Diego asked
‘Well, nobody here likes coffee, but Danny loves slimming milkshakes. Mr Armando, is there anything else you would like other than coffee?’
‘No, it’s OK, I’ll pop down to the shop and buy some,’ said Diego.
‘I’ll go and get the milkshake and the tea,’ Danny said, leaving the room.
‘That was Danny Defendo by the way,’ Grossberg explained, ‘He’s the new defence attorney I’ve recently taken on. There was another application – some lad named Apollo Justice – but I didn’t like the look of his spikes, so I accepted young Danny instead.’
‘Oh, right. Anyway, I’ll go and get that coffee, I’m seriously craving some caffeine right now!’ said Diego, running out of the door.

Mia sat down on Grossberg’s squeaky leather sofa.
‘So… how have you been, Mia?’ Grossberg asked in an attempt to make conversation.
‘Um… mostly dead,’ she said, ‘Look, I really need to use the ladies’ room…’
‘Ah, I see!’ said Grossberg, looking embarrassed, ‘Can you remember where it is?’
‘Well, duh! D’you really think I would forget where the toilets are?’
‘No, of course you wouldn’t!’
Mia got up and headed down the corridor, only to realise that she actually couldn’t remember. But after a quick search she soon found them.
Meanwhile, Grossberg was stood by his desk, tidying up some papers while he waited for Danny to bring his tea. He quietly hummed a tune to himself as he tucked some files away into his desk drawer.
A gunshot rang out through the still, quiet air of the office. Grossberg clutched at his chest, and fell to the floor with a heavy thud.

Diego was whistling to himself as he returned to Grossberg Law Offices with a pack of his favourite coffee beans. He expected to see Grossberg trying to talk to Mia about the ‘days of his youth’.
What he didn’t expect was to see Grossberg dead on the floor, with Danny stood staring in horror, and Mia lying on the sofa looking faint.
‘What’s going on?’ he cried, dropping the coffee beans down onto the desk, ‘Mia, are you OK?’
‘He… he… he’s dead!’ she gasped breathlessly.
‘It wasn’t me, I swear!’ Danny yelled. The tray of drinks slipped out of his trembling hands, and smashed on the floor.
‘Has anyone called the police?’ Diego demanded. Mia shook her head weakly. Diego pulled out his mobile.

The police soon arrived, including Detective Gumshoe and Ema. They fenced off the area with police tape, and got to work questioning everyone. It didn’t take them long to make an arrest.
‘Please, I didn’t do it! It wasn’t me, I promise!’ Danny cried as they handcuffed him and dragged him away.
‘Poor kid,’ said Diego, ‘Do you think he really killed him?’
‘Of course I do!’ said Mia, who had completely recovered from her shock, ‘Who else could it have been? Me!?’
‘No, no, that’s not what I meant at all!’ said Diego quickly, ‘You’re right, it must have been Danny.’
Ema walked over to them, with Edgeworth by her side.
‘Yes, she thinks it was Danny,’ Ema was saying. Edgeworth nodded.
‘Mia Fey,’ he said, ‘Would you be willing to testify in court about this incident?’
‘Oooh! I’ve always wanted to be a witness… all that attention…! Of course I will!’ said Mia, smiling at the thought of everyone looking at her, ‘Diego, you’ll need to buy me a new outfit, so I can look lovely on the witness stand!’
‘Don’t worry, we’ll go shopping later!’ he said with a grin.

Ema and Gumshoe gathered clues and questioned people for most of the day, then went back to Wright & Co Law Offices for dinner – Gumshoe practically lived at Phoenix’s house nowadays.
‘So, did anything exciting happen today, Ema?’ Maya asked.
‘Oh, yes! There was a murder at Grossberg Law Offices!’
‘Hey! That’s confidential, pal, you can’t just tell anyone!’ said Gumshoe, ‘You’ve got a lot to learn, Officer Skye!’
‘I’m sorry,’ said Ema, ‘But I think they’d better know, seeing as Phoenix will probably defend the suspect.’
‘Why is it always me?’ Phoenix groaned.
‘Your new client is at the detention centre, you can see him tomorrow,’ Ema said.
‘Good! Maybe you’ll get paid this time, Phoenix!’ said Maya happily, pausing to glare at Detective Gumshoe.
‘Hey, don’t look at me like that, pal!’ he said, ‘It’s not like you really needed to defend me anyway, as it was a setup! So I don’t need to pay… right?’
‘Well, I suppose you wouldn’t be able to afford it anyway! You’re so poor you can’t even buy a Steel Samurai Deluxe Edition DVD Box Set!’ Maya laughed, while everyone gave her a funny look. Pearl soon brought out a dish of hot noodles, and everyone tucked in; the murder case was forgotten until the next day.

The next morning, Phoenix and Maya went to the detention centre to meet the new client.
‘Hi! You must be Danny Defendo… right?’ asked Phoenix.
‘No, I’m Morgan Fey!’ said Morgan, ‘You’re in the wrong visiting room – Danny is next door.’
‘Oh, OK!’ said Phoenix.
‘By the way, I hope you die soon, Mystic Maya!’ Morgan called as they went to find Danny.
Finally they got to the right room. Danny Defendo sat behind the glass, looking depressed.
‘Are you Morgan Fey?’ Phoenix asked warily.
‘No, I’m Danny Defendo…’ he replied sulkily, ‘And I’ve been arrested for something I didn’t even do! It’s so unfair!’
‘Believe me, we know how you feel!’ said Phoenix, ‘We’ve both been arrested twice for murder when we were actually innocent!’ Maya nodded in agreement.
‘But don’t worry!’ Phoenix continued, ‘I’ll get you out of here… for a price!’
‘Well, I’ll pay as much as I can. Do you actually think you’ll get me found innocent?’ asked Danny hopefully.
‘Hmm, I sure hope so… otherwise I have no idea how I’m gonna pay the bills this month!’

After Danny had told them everything he knew, they went to the crime scene.
‘Hey, I remember this place!’ said Phoenix, ‘This is where that fat guy works… right?’
‘That ‘fat guy’ is the murder victim, Nick,’ said Maya, ‘Marvin Grossberg – remember?’
‘Yeah… was he the one with the topknot and the bobbles in his hair?’
‘No, Phoenix – that’s ME!’ said Maya, feeling increasingly annoyed at how stupid Phoenix was nowadays, ‘Come on, let’s take a look at the office.’
There weren’t many clues lying around, but they gathered up what they could. Gumshoe was round the back of the office, where a murder weapon had been found.
‘Detective Gumshoe!’ said Phoenix, ‘Tell us everything you know!’
‘No can do, pal,’ said Gumshoe, ‘I’ve got a new policy; don’t tell all the details to the enemy! Mr Edgeworth told me off, as I always end up giving you loads of clues.’
‘Please, detective! We need all the help we can get!’ Maya begged.
‘My lips are sealed, pal!’
‘Aw, come on… you can move in with us if you help us out!’ Phoenix said.
‘Alright! Detective Gumshoe at your service, pal!’
It turned out that there weren’t many details to the case anyway, and Phoenix regretted saying he would let Gumshoe move in with them. He gave them the murder weapon, a gun which had been dropped outside the office window, and told them all he knew about the murder – which wasn’t really a lot.
‘Well, that’s all I know, pal,’ said Gumshoe, ‘I’ll be at your place later! Actually… I guess it’s my place too now, right?’
‘Right…’ Phoenix said unenthusiastically.

‘Do you thinks there’s any more evidence here, Nick?’ Maya said as they headed out of Grossberg Law Offices.
‘Probably not. Hang on; I’m just going to the loo…’ Phoenix dashed into the men’s toilets which he’d just spotted. After doing his business, he noticed something on the floor – some lipstick. He picked it up and brought it out with him.
‘Er… Nick? Why do you have some lipstick?’ Maya asked nervously.
‘Oh, I found it in the toilets, lying on the floor.’
‘But why was there lipstick in the men’s toilets?’
‘Dunno… maybe Larry went in there!’ Phoenix laughed. Maya laughed too, but had an uneasy feeling that this lipstick was more important than it seemed…

The trial was the next day – giving Phoenix barely any time to prepare, as always. Once again Iris came to the courtroom with him, as well as Pearl and Maya.
‘Hi Danny,’ said Phoenix, ‘I’ve got some clues… dunno how much use they’ll be though, so don’t get your hopes up…’
‘Oh, thanks for making me feel better!’ said Danny bitterly.
‘Feenie, you’ll do a great job, no matter what!’ said Iris, fluttering her eyelashes at him.
‘Come on, the trial is starting!’ Maya sighed, shoving them into the courtroom.

‘My first witness is Mia Fey, an ex-employee of the victim, who was at the law offices on the day of the murder!’ Edgeworth announced. Mia took the stand, looking extra glamorous with a chunky diamond necklace, a short white dress and diamond studded sunglasses.
‘Hi Mia!’ Phoenix called, waving at her.
‘Could the defence please refrain from waving at the witness?’ said the judge.
‘Mia’s a witness?’ Maya whispered, ‘I never saw that coming!’
‘Hello everyone!’ said Mia, blowing kisses to everyone in the courtroom, ‘Do you like my latest surgery?’ She turned sideways to show off her ridiculously slim figure.
‘OBJECTION!’ shouted Edgeworth, ‘Could the witness please show me her figure later rather than during the trial?’
‘Sure I can, Edgy!’ said Mia, pouting her lips.
The judge slammed down his gavel. ‘I’d like to see later as well. Now can we please proceed with the trial?’

Phoenix found it difficult to cross examine Mia, as he was so busy admiring her, but he eventually pointed out several contradictions.
‘Miss Fey!’ he said firmly, trying to forget his attraction to her, ‘You are clearly lying for some reason!’
‘Nick! My sis wouldn’t lie on the witness stand!’ Mia gasped, shocked.
‘Then why are there so many problems with her testimony?’ he yelled, ‘Maybe… maybe she’s the real killer!’
‘OBJECTION!’ yelled Edgeworth, ‘How can you accuse this lovely lady of being a murderer?’
‘Yes, how could you, Feenie?’ Mia said, imitating Iris’s voice.
‘O-Objection!’ squealed Iris, ‘Feenie is MY cute nickname for Phoenix! You can’t just copy it!’
‘Oh yes I can!’
‘Oh no you can’t!’
‘Oh yes I-’
‘ORDER!!!’ bellowed the judge, whacking down his gavel, ‘There will be a twenty minute recess, in so that you can all calm down!’
Everyone pushed their way out of the noisy courtroom.
‘Nick! How could you accuse Mia!?’ Maya said, horrified, ‘I don’t know why I’m even on your side!’
‘Fine, join the prosecution!’ Phoenix said.
‘OK, maybe I will!’
Maya stormed off, with Pearl tagging along behind her.

Iris went to get a drink from the courtroom cafeteria and Danny had gone for questioning, leaving Phoenix alone until Ema unexpectedly turned up.
‘Phoenix!’ she said, ‘Please don’t tell anyone I came here, but… well, I don’t think Danny is the killer. It may not be Mia either, but I want to help you out.’
‘Really? Wow!’ said Phoenix; he’d pretty much given up hope until now.
‘I brought you this. It’s my fingerprint testing powder,’ said Ema, quickly, shoving a small bottle into Phoenix’s hand, ‘If there’s any evidence you are suspicious about, use this to test it for prints!’ Then she dashed out of the lobby.
Phoenix looked thoughtfully through his collection of evidence. It all seemed pretty straightforward – except for one piece.
The lipstick.
He picked it up, wondering what exactly it had been doing in the men’s toilets. Maybe this was the evidence he needed to test for prints?
‘Feenie! What are you doing with another woman’s lipstick?’ Iris said, looking hurt.
‘Oh, just testing it for fingerprints,’ he said, opening up the small bottle from Ema. He dabbed on the powder and blew it away, leaving a clear print on the side of the lipstick.
‘Feenie, you are so clever!’ said Iris, ‘Whose print is it?’
Phoenix looked through his fingerprint file, searching for a match. One print caught his eye; Mia’s.
‘B-but… why was Mia’s lipstick in the men’s toilets?’ he murmured.
‘Feenie, we’re out of time. Let’s get back into the courtroom!’ Iris said, while Phoenix was still deep in thought…

When they got into the courtroom, Maya was stood with Edgeworth, glaring at Phoenix, who tried his best to ignore her.
Mia testified again. Phoenix cross examined her, and he finally figured it out.
‘Mia!’ he said at last, ‘I know your secret!’
‘Huh? You do?’ She looked worried.
‘Yes! Take a look at this evidence!’ he showed the lipstick to the courtroom, ‘You weren’t in the lady’s bathroom at all… you went to the men’s toilets by accident, and were too embarrassed to tell the court!’
‘Nonsense! The witness wouldn’t care about something as trivial as that!’ Edgeworth protested.
‘Actually, it’s true,’ said Mia, ‘I DID go in the men’s bathroom by accident. But there’s more to it than that… Phoenix, look at it from a different angle, and you will see why I lied!’
‘Why can’t you just tell me things instead of hinting them!?’ Phoenix groaned, but Mia grinned smugly.
‘Hey! Only I can give Feenie advice!’ Iris said, pointing at Mia.
‘Oh no you can’t!
‘Oh yes I can!’
While an argument raged in the courtroom, Phoenix checked his evidence one more time… ‘Aha! TAKE THAT!’ he yelled. The two arguing women fell silent.
‘What is it, Wright?’ Edgeworth asked, ‘The… office floor plans?’
‘Exactly!’ said Phoenix, ‘See that the men’s toilets are in a different place? Mia couldn’t have witnessed the murder as she was coming out of the toilets! She didn’t see anything, and this whole testimony was made up!’
‘But why would she make it up?’ the judge asked, confused.
‘Perhaps because she killed Marvin Grossberg!’ Phoenix declared.
‘No! You’ve got it all wrong, Phoenix! I just made it up to get some attention!’ Mia said, ‘I seriously didn’t kill him!’
‘Hmm, I think this requires another day of investigation…’ said the judge.
‘No! Wait!’ said a mysterious voice. Apollo Justice was stood at the witness stand, trying to shove Mia out of the way, which wasn’t easy, as her pointy high-heels were wedged into the floor. ‘I know something! I need to testify!’
‘Very well. Shall we have another recess?’ said the judge, ‘Mr Edgeworth, prepare the witness!’

In the defendant’s lobby for a third time that day, Phoenix was pacing up and down the room, muttering under his breath.
‘Stop doing that, Feenie! You’re scaring me!’ said Iris.
‘Shhh, I’m thinking…’ he mumbled, ‘Mia… murder… Apollo… lipstick… toilets… Grossberg… gun… aha! Fingerprint powder!’
Phoenix sat down on the sofa, almost squashing Iris, and got out the bottle of fingerprint powder.
‘Let’s see… what might have some prints on it…?’ He pulled out random pieces of evidence, throwing them to the floor when he realised they were no good. Eventually he picked up the gun. He showered it with grey powder and blew on it, then flicked through his file of prints.
‘Are you OK, Feenie?’ Iris asked, seriously worried that he had gone mad.
‘I’m more than alright!’ he said, ‘I’ve figured it all out!’

‘Apollo Justice!’ Phoenix shouted, ‘You are the real killer!’
‘But I haven’t even testified yet!’ said Apollo, ‘I’m no murderer!’
‘Then why are your fingerprints on the murder weapon?’
‘W-well… maybe I touched the gun during the investigation...? I am a detective after all!’ Apollo said, his voice shaking.
‘Well, look at this!’ said Phoenix, presenting a report on the detectives who had investigated the crime, ‘You weren’t a part of this investigation! There is no reason for your prints to be there… unless you were involved in the crime!’
‘No! No, I’m sure there’s an explanation… please believe me!’
‘I’m not sure what to believe…’ said the judge, his eyes wide in shock, ‘Although I do believe that the defence has an obsession with accusing every witness who takes the stand!’
‘Very well, Wright,’ said Edgeworth coolly, ‘Tell me… why would Apollo Justice want to kill Marvin Grossberg?’
‘Hahaha… for once, I actually know what I’m doing!’ said Phoenix. Everyone gasped in surprise. ‘Look… here is a job application for Apollo to work for Grossberg! But Danny got the job instead. Apollo was desperate to be an attorney, but his dreams were shattered. So he planned to kill Grossberg, and frame Danny – that way, both of them would have their lives ruined just like Apollo did!’
‘Wow! Nick knows what he’s talking about for once…!’ Maya gasped.
‘Feenie, I’m so proud of you!’ Iris shrieked, kissing him on the lips.
‘OBJECTION!’ yelled Edgeworth, ‘No kissing in the courtroom! And this theory about Apollo proves nothing!’
‘No, it’s OK,’ said Apollo, ‘Mr Wright… is right. I admit it. I killed Marvin Grossberg, and tried to frame Danny Defendo. That’s why I came here to testify today – I was worried that you’d end up finding out what I did, and I wanted to protect myself by testifying against Danny. But it turns out you worked it out anyway… and I would have gotten away with it too, if it weren’t for you meddling kids!’
‘Hey! Are you saying I’m a kid? That’s no fair!’ said Phoenix, pouting like a small child.
‘Anyway… bailiff, have Mr Justice arrested at once!’ said Edgeworth. Some police officers came to take Apollo away. ‘Well, it seems you win, Wright…’

Later they had a party to celebrate Danny’s freedom. All the usual people turned up; Mia, Diego, Edgeworth, Franziska, plus everyone who lived with Phoenix.
‘Thanks, Mr Wright,’ said Danny, ‘I really thought it was all over for me!’
‘No problem… after all, I’d do anything for money,’ said Phoenix, holding out his hand. Danny sighed and handed him a roll of cash.
Phoenix went upstairs and put the money in his piggybank, then went back to the party. He was hoping to find Maya and tease her about joining the prosecution and losing the trial. He spotted her sprawled on the sofa with Edgeworth, their lips locked together in a steamy kiss.
‘Oh, great… there goes my chance of getting her as a girlfriend…’ he sighed. Iris suddenly appeared, wanting to dance with him.
‘Iris! What is your obsession with me?’ he said angrily.
‘Well, I AM your girlfriend, Feenie!’ she giggled, ‘Of course, I know you’re joking! Come on, let’s dance!’
He unenthusiastically let her drag him onto the dance floor in the middle of the room. Luckily someone had brought alcohol, and he was soon so drunk he forgot to be annoyed about Maya and Iris, and spent the evening dancing around like a lunatic instead of being grumpy.

A few weeks later it was Maya’s birthday, and Edgeworth planned a surprise party.
‘Everyone has to help make it a lovely occasion for her, OK?’ he said, ‘Because if ANYONE ruins Maya’s birthday…!’ He pounded his fist against the palm of his hand, just to make the message clear.
‘What d’you think I should get as a present?’ Phoenix asked Pearl, once they were alone.
‘Hmm… I don’t know. I like pets, though, and Mystic Maya might like them too…’ said Pearl.
‘Aha! A pet! Perfect!’ said Phoenix, ‘That way I can have a cute, cuddly animal in house, but I’ll make Maya look after it!’
He went to the pet shop and spent hours rolling around with the fluffy creatures, until eventually the shopkeeper tried to throw him out.
‘Ok, I’ll buy something! Sheesh!’ Phoenix said, ‘I’ll take this one!’
Meanwhile, Edgeworth was surfing the web, looking for the perfect gift.
‘Aha! She’ll love this!’ he said, selecting something and entering in his credit card details.

The day of her birthday came. They needed to get Maya out of the house so they could prepare the surprise party. Phoenix wrote her a shopping list full of ridiculous non-existent items to buy, so she would be out of the way for a while.
‘Hey, Maya – can you go shopping for me?’ Phoenix said, passing her the list.
‘Oh, but it’s my birthday! Why do I have to go shopping for you?’ she whinged.
‘Cos everyone’s forgotten about your birthday, Maya! Please, I really, really need you to get me those items!’
Maya looked down at the list. ‘Er… Nick? Are you sure that there will really be a Cheese-flavoured Nosebleed or a Snot Bouquet in the shops?’
‘Yeah, of course! Now, don’t come home until you’ve bought all of those things!’ Phoenix said.
‘But Nick, I wanted to celebrate my birthday, not go hunting around the shops for you…’ Maya said, ‘And I really don’t know where to get a Perfumed Steamroller…’
‘Well, you’ll need to look for one! Remember, no birthday celebrations until you’ve got me my steamroller!’
‘Fine, fine, I’ll try and find these stupid things for you!’ Maya grumbled, heading out of the door.
‘Excellent!’ Phoenix laughed, ‘My plan is working! Come on guys, let’s get ready for this party!’

Everyone was busy – well, except Phoenix, who was bored of blowing up balloons and had already started tucking in to the party food.
‘Please, stop eating!’ said Pearl, ‘You can’t have the food until Mystic Maya is here!’
‘She won’t mind,’ said Phoenix, munching on ten sausage rolls at once with his mouth wide open.
‘Oh Feenie, you are such a laugh at parties!’ said Iris, trying to avoid being showered with crumbs.
They had just finished blowing up balloons and stringing them around the room when Pearl came running across from the window, wearing her best party dress.
‘Mystic Maya is coming!’ she whispered. Everyone silently hid behind the sofa, getting ready to jump out.
Maya came in through the front door, her hands full of shopping bags. She blinked in disbelief, staring in confusion at the brightly decorated living room.
‘SURPRISE!’ everybody yelled in unison, leaping out from behind the sofa. Maya screamed and fell backwards, landing on her bottom. Phoenix laughed at her, while Edgeworth rushed over to help her up.
‘Happy birthday, my little Maya Princess Pie,’ he said, sweeping her into a passionate kiss. Phoenix pretended to be sick in the corner.
‘Are you OK, Feenie? Maybe you shouldn’t have eaten all those sausage rolls…’ said Iris, patting him on the back as he pretended to throw up all over the floor while Edgeworth and Maya were still kissing right next to him.
‘Whoa! Is it really half twelve already?’ Maya shrieked, staring at the clock.
‘Yeah, Phoenix made you a fake shopping list so we had time to prepare the party,’ Edgeworth explained, ‘I hope you don’t mind, my little sweetie dumpling.’ They kissed again, while Iris tried convincing Phoenix to stop acting like he was vomiting, as it was surprisingly realistic and very disgusting.
‘So, I bought all these things for nothing?’ Maya said, once Edgeworth had stopped kissing her, ‘It took me AGES to find the grasshopper-shaped pasta! And this solid gold shower cap was really expensive!’
‘You mean you actually BOUGHT all the things on the list?’ Ema gasped. Maya nodded.
‘Wow! You actually found me a Snot Bouquet! I’ve always wanted one of those!’ Phoenix shrieked, running over to the shopping bags to look through all the crazy things Maya had bought for him.
Everyone just stood there, laughing.
‘Come on, let’s get this party started!’ Detective Gumshoe boomed suddenly. He turned on the stereo, and the party began.

‘Presents time!’ Pearl squealed, turning the music down so that it was practically silent. Everyone stopped dancing, grumbling that they wanted the music turned back up.
‘Everybody shut up!’ Edgeworth yelled, ‘It’s time to give Maya her presents!’
He put his arm around her and sat her down on the sofa; everyone grabbed their presents for her, which were tucked under the coffee table, and gathered around.
‘Here you are, darling!’ said Edgeworth passing her a lumpy present and a card.
‘Thanks Miles!’ She eagerly ripped off the wrapping paper to reveal a large ornamental bear with ‘I LOVE YOU’ engraved onto its paw.
‘Yay… Just what I wanted…’ Maya said, in a slightly disappointed voice, kissing him on the cheek.
‘Haha! Bad choice, Edgey – even I know that Maya hates ornaments!’ Phoenix blurted out. She glared at him.
‘It’s a lovely present… really!’ she said, putting the card to one side, as she wasn’t really interested in cards.
‘Wait! Open it now, please!’ Edgeworth shoved the envelope back into her hands.
‘Um… ok!’ She tore off the envelope. Inside it was a fancy hand-made birthday card, which had obviously been very expensive. Without bothering to read it, she put it up on the windowsill.
‘It’s a nice card, thank you…’
‘No! Look inside!’ Edgeworth urged, a little annoyed at how long it was taking for Maya to discover the special present he’d ordered from the internet. She picked up the card and opened it; two slips of paper fell out onto the floor.
Phoenix picked them up. ‘Rurnturn…tinket…skyung…holdididay…swizzlehand…’ he read, with difficulty.
‘Oh Feenie, you are so silly sometimes!’ Iris said affectionately, taking the tickets out of his hands and passing them back to Maya. She read what they said, and her eyes widened.
‘Whoa! Miles, you bought us return tickets for a skiing holiday in Switzerland!?’ she gasped.
‘Yep – I knew you’d love it!’
‘Oh, thankyouthankyouthankyou! I’ve always wanted to go skiing!’ she cried, flinging the tickets aside and wrapping her arms around Edgeworth.
‘You’re welcome, my little perfect porcelain doll – now, why don’t you open the rest of you presents?’
‘Ok! Come on guys, gimme the presents already!’ She sat down on the sofa, waiting as everyone approached her with gifts.

The presents weren’t all that exciting; most of the party guests either couldn’t afford a decent present, or couldn’t be bothered to buy one. Gumshoe gave her a strange rusty pot filled with some kind of thick smelly liquid.
‘Erm… thanks, Gumshoe!’ she said in a very unconvincing voice, ‘Er… What exactly is it?’
‘Perfume, of course! I made it myself, pal! You can use it for anything – bubble bath, shampoo, soap… or just slop it on in the mornings to make yourself smell nice!’
‘Um… right! Of course, I knew it was perfume all along!’ She took a quick sniff, and sneezed several times. Gumshoe disappeared off to the food table.
‘Miles, can you hide this away where I will never have to see it again?’ she whispered, shoving the cauldron into Edgeworth’s hands. He dashed into the kitchen before Gumshoe saw, and put the pot on top of the fridge.
‘Perfect – it should be safe here!’ he muttered, ‘After all, who seriously looks at the top of the fridge when they’re getting some food? I am such a genius!’

Meanwhile, Franziska was presenting Maya with a mysterious basket-shaped gift. She opened it up to find a woven basket.
‘Thanks Franziska… I really love baskets! Great for… er… keeping stuff in!’ Maya said, putting it on the floor.
The basket made a noise, and Pearl jumped backwards in surprise.
‘Mystic Maya – there’s something in the basket!’
‘Open it up, Pearly!’ Maya said. Pearl cautiously opened the lid a crack. There was a hissing noise and Pearl screamed, dropping the lid shut.
‘What is it?’ Maya asked. Pearl was too shocked to answer. Maya opened the lid to take a look for herself. ‘Waargh!’ she shrieked; Edgeworth heard and came running.
‘What’s wrong, my sweet little sugar plum fairy?’
‘B-basket…’ she whimpered, pointing a shaking finger towards the present from Franziska. Edgeworth opened it. Inside was a shiny green coiled snake. He reached in and picked it up. ‘Hello there, little fellow!’ he said, tickling it under the chin.
‘Wow, Edgey, I never knew you were so good with snakes!’ Phoenix said, impressed. The snake hissed loudly and jabbed its teeth towards Edgeworth’s face. He quickly dropped it back into the box.
‘Is it… p-poisonous?’ Maya stuttered, unable to take her eyes away from the basket in case the snake came slithering out.
‘Probably – I never thought to check,’ said Franziska, ‘I expect it is, judging by the distinctive markings around its head.’
‘Franzy, what were you thinking buying Maya a potentially dangerous creature for a birthday present!?’ Edgeworth exclaimed, ‘If I’d known it might be poisonous I’d never have picked it up!’
‘Well, I was unsure what to buy for a girl of Maya’s age.’
‘Um… Franziska? Have you forgotten that I’m the SAME AGE as you?’ said Maya.
‘Well, technically yes, but if you’re talking about maturity….’ Franziska began, quickly falling silent when Edgeworth shot her a warning glare.
Pearl had plucked up the courage to peep at the snake again; after she’d got over the initial shock, she thought that it was actually quite cute.
‘What are you going to call it, Mystic Maya?’
‘I dunno… does it really need to have a name, Pearly?’ Maya said, not wanting to have anything to do with the snake.
‘Of course! Everything has to have a name, even snakes!’ Pearl nibbled her thumb, thinking. ‘Aha! You could call it Misty, like your mother!’
‘What - name that BEAST after my mother!?’ Maya gasped in horror, ‘Nah… I think I’ll call it Morgan!’
‘Oh, like MY mother!’ Pearl said happily, ‘That’s very kind, Mystic Maya! I think that Morgan the snake will be very happy here in her new home!’

The next present was from Phoenix.
‘Here ya go, Maya!’ he said, dropping a heavy present into her lap. It wobbled a bit, and there were scraping sounds coming from inside.
‘Oh great… is this another snake, Nick? Or maybe some kind of giant spider?’ Maya sighed.
‘No, no! Just open it up, OK?’ Phoenix watched with a grin while Maya unwrapped the present. There was a tattered cardboard box inside, sealed with thick tape.
‘Here, I’ll break off that tape,’ Edgeworth offered, pulling out his knife (which was the exact colour of his suit) and slicing across the top of the box. Maya opened it up; a small fluffy white kitten sat inside, staring up at her with huge shining eyes.
‘Awwwwww!’ she cried, reaching in and lifting the kitten into her arms. Immediately it started to purr. ‘Nick, thank you so much! This is the best present ever!’
‘Heh heh heh… it’s nothing, really…’ Phoenix laughed, grinning goofily. Edgeworth frowned at him, but nobody noticed; they were all fussing over the kitten.
‘Does this kitten have a name, Mystic Maya?’ Pearl asked, carefully stroking the kitten’s velvety ear.
‘Hmmm… how about Misty?’
‘Oh, just like your mother, Mystic Misty!’ said Pearl.
Suddenly an ear-splitting scream came from the kitchen.

Mia had been innocently getting a slimming milkshake from the fridge when it happened. She opened the door and a huge cauldron of gloopy liquid came cascading down onto her head, knocking her to the floor.
Diego recognised her loud scream and came running. She sat up, flicking the goo out of her eyes.
‘D-d-d-’ Diego stuttered, pointing to the floor. Mia was confused for a moment, then realised she was sat on something bony and uncomfortable. She turned her head to see a familiar evil face glaring at her.
‘Dahlia Hawthorne, my arch enemy!’ Mia gasped. She quickly stood up and stared down at the red headed girl lying in the puddle of Detective Gumshoe’s perfume.
‘What’s going on?’ Maya cried, appearing in the doorway with a crowd of people around her.
‘It seems that the evil demon known as Dahlia Hawthorne is back from the dead….’ Diego said grimly.
‘Aw, come on! You’re exaggerating a bit, aren’t you? I mean… demon!?’ Dahlia grumbled.
‘Well, you’re a mass murderer! You’re not exactly an angel!’ Mia pointed out, ‘By the way you’re also naked.’
‘Oh, FANTASTIC!’ Dahlia stood up and barged past the staring crowd of people. She found a folded dress on the coffee table, which had been one of Maya’s birthday presents, and put it on.
‘Erm… didn’t she die?’ Phoenix asked, ‘Why is she here?’
‘Well… that’s a tough question,’ said Diego, thinking hard, ‘How the heck DID she get here?’
Mia thought back to the moments just before she was resurrected from the dead. She had been in the afterlife…
‘Aha! I’ve got it!’ she exclaimed, ‘I remember now! Just before you brought me back to life, I was fighting with Dahlia in the afterlife! So maybe she was brought back too… only it didn’t work properly for her, and she was attached to me, invisible until this weird potion fell on my head and detached her!’ Mia grinned, looking very pleased with herself for figuring it out.
‘Well done, kitten! You’re a lot cleverer than I thought!’ Diego said, giving her a big kiss.
‘I’m more than just a pretty face!’ she giggled, ‘Wait a second… does this mean I’ve been carrying Dahlia around with me this whole time…?’
‘Yes, and it was the worst experience of my life!’ Dahlia groaned, looking like she might be sick.
‘So you’ve seen… everything that I’ve done since coming back to life?’
‘Every sickening second of it…’ Dahlia ran off to the bathroom, her face looking very green.

Gumshoe scratched his head in confusion. ‘So… my perfume was actually magic?’
‘It seems so!’ said Ema excitedly, ‘What did you put in it? Please tell me! Please please please!’ She pulled her pink glasses over her eyes and got out her notebook.
Detective Gumshoe just shrugged. ‘I dunno… just a load of random stuff, I guess. Some stuff from the bathroom… random food from the kitchen… chemicals from your mini lab set… basically a bit of everything!’
‘Oh…’ Ema put away her notebook, looking disappointed. ‘Ah well,’ she said, pulling a strange tube out of her pocket, ‘I can always take a sample and analyse the chemical structure…’
‘Too late,’ said Maya, pointing to the kitchen. The sludge on the floor was all gone, and the cauldron it had been in was totally empty. Ema was puzzled until she noticed Misty the cat vomiting in the corner.
‘That must’ve been a really hungry cat to eat that weird muck!’ Maya laughed, ‘Phoenix, when did you buy her? Did you even feed her since you bought her?’
‘Er…. It was only a few days, maybe a week,’ he said, ‘I didn’t realise I had to feed it!’
Maya couldn’t help but laugh at his stupidity, although she felt a little sorry for the poor cat. ‘Well, you could always analyse the vomit, Ema…’
Ema put away her test tube. ‘I think I’ll pass on that one!’

Mia managed to forget her hatred for Dahlia, and she became a part of the Wright & Co household. After all, Dahlia seemed pretty much harmless now – she even wanted Phoenix to be her boyfriend, which Iris wasn’t too happy about. But Phoenix remembered the incident where Dahlia had nearly killed him, and turned her down.
‘Oh Feenie, I KNEW you would choose me instead of Dollie!’ Iris cried, flinging herself onto his lap on the sofa. He laughed awkwardly, hoping Iris wouldn’t notice him gazing at Maya.

Later that evening, the birthday party was finally beginning to die down.
‘Hey Phoenix, will you help me carry these presents into my room?’ Maya asked, her arms overflowing with a heap of gifts.
‘Can’t your boyfriend do it?’ he groaned.
‘No, he’s trying to catch Morgan the snake – she slithered up his trousers, and he wants revenge!’
‘Oh, I wish I’d seen that!’ Phoenix laughed, ‘Ok, I’ll help you.’ He scooped up an armful of presents and followed Maya into her room.
‘Where shall I put them?’
‘Just dump them on the bed… most of them are a load of rubbish, anyway!’
Phoenix plonked the presents onto Maya’s Steel Samurai duvet.
‘So… did you like the dog I gave you?’’ he said hopefully.
‘Actually, it was a cat…’ Maya corrected him, ‘But yes, it was a great present!’ She took a step closer to him, feeling strange.
‘Hey, Maya?’
‘Yeah?’
‘Do you ever get that feeling where you just want to snog someone’s face off?’
Maya blushed. ‘Er… not really, Phoenix.’
‘Oh.’
There was a moment of silence, and Maya tried not to make eye contact.
‘Er… Maya?’
‘Yes, Phoenix?’
‘Can I snog your face off?’
Maya’s eyes widened. She peered through the doorway to check there was no one around. ‘Well, sure,’ she said, ‘But if Edgeworth comes, pretend I was choking on some birthday cake and you’re giving me mouth-to-mouth resuscitation, OK?’
‘OK!’

The days went by, and the skiing holiday loomed closer and closer.
‘Won’t it be great, my little angel poppet? Just the two of us!’ Edgeworth cooed, tickling Maya under the chin like she was a fluffy little pet.
‘Um… yeah…’ she mumbled. It was hard to admit to herself that she was getting sick of Edgeworth, but it was true. She just couldn’t help making excuses just to get away from him. Even more worryingly, she found that she preferred spending time with… Phoenix.
‘Um… I’m going to… um… mow the lawn!’ Maya said. She ran off into her bedroom, and shut the door behind her. Suddenly, two arms grabbed her from behind. Phoenix’s hand clamped over her mouth before she could scream.
‘Hello, Maya!’ he said, wiggling his eyebrows, ‘I’ve been waiting!’
‘Nick! Why are you in my room? I told you, you’re not allowed to just barge in whenever you like!’
‘Whatever… it’s my house, I can go wherever I like!’ Phoenix said. Maya started pouting, so he changed the subject. ‘So, looking forward to your little trip with lover-boy?’
‘Hey, don’t call him that!’ she protested, ‘I don’t even love him, anyway! And no, I’m NOT looking forward to it!’
‘Why not? I’m sure it’s very cosy in that little wooden lodge… all alone on a mountain…’
Maya glared at him. Then an idea popped into her head. ‘Hey, Nick! You’ve always wanted to go skiing… right?’
‘Hmm… does it involve making snow angels? Cos I LOVE snow angels!’
‘Sure, sure! Ok, you’re coming too! You can bring the whole household, and maybe even invite Mia and Diego! It’ll be great… a big friendly holiday where Edgeworth will get hardly any time alone with me!’ She grinned. ‘What are you waiting for? Book the tickets already! And whatever you do… don’t tell Edgeworth!’

‘Bye, Pearly! I’ll really miss you!’ Maya said, hugging her little cousin tightly.
‘But Mystic Maya, Mr Nick says we’re all coming too, tomorr-’
‘Shh, Pearly… As far as Edgeworth knows, you’re staying right here! OK?’
‘Ok, Mystic Maya!’ Pearl said, lowering her voice to a whisper, ‘See you tomorrow!’
‘Are you ready, my magic sparkle princess cherry blossom?’ Edgeworth called from behind the car, where he was loading in their luggage.
‘Just coming!’ Maya called back, ‘See you soon, Pearly!’ She patted Pearl on the head and ran to the car, quickly calling her goodbyes to everyone who was stood outside the Law Offices watching her leave.
Edgeworth held the passenger door open for her and she climbed in, waving to everyone through the window.
‘Ready for the holiday of a lifetime?’ he asked with a smile as he put the keys in the ignition.
‘Yep…’ Maya said, trying to sound enthusiastic. To be honest, she was dreading the journey – she was pretty sick of Edgeworth by now, and just spending a few minutes with him was annoying.
‘Well, let’s get going! Switzerland, here we come!’ Edgeworth put his foot down on the pedal, and the shiny red car drove down the road and out of sight.

‘Right, guys! I’ve got a surprise for you!’ Phoenix said as soon as the car had gone. He stepped back so that he was facing everybody. ‘We’re going on a skiing holiday to Switzerland!’ He held up a glossy brochure for a fancy ski resort.
‘But… isn’t that where Maya and Edgeworth are going?’ Diego asked, raising his eyebrows.
‘Huh? …Oh yeah!’ said Phoenix, pretending very unconvincingly that he’d only just realised this. ‘Oh well, the tickets are booked for tomorrow, so we kinda have to go!’ Everyone looked uncertain. ‘Aw, come on! You can’t say no… especially after Diego paid for all your tickets!’
‘W-WHAT!?’ Diego yelled, spitting out the mouthful of coffee he’d just been drinking, ‘But… HOW?’
Phoenix pulled a credit card out of his pocket. ‘Here, you can have it back. I knew you wouldn’t mind me using it!’ He passed the card to Diego.
‘Y-you STOLE my CREDIT CARD!?’
‘Actually, Dahlia helped me out with that part…’ Phoenix said.
Dahlia grinned evilly.
‘Hmm… well, I guess we’d better make the most of these tickets,’ Diego sighed, ‘Come on guys… let’s get packing!’

The next morning, a large huddle of people was stood outside Wright & Co Law Offices, their suitcases dumped messily all over the pavement.
‘Good morning, everyone…’ Phoenix yawned, coming out of the office with a pink suitcase, ‘Did we have to leave so… early?’
‘Phoenix, it’s 11AM! It’s not early at all!’ Ema said, whacking him round the head with her rucksack.
‘OW! Well, that sure woke me up…’ Phoenix said, rubbing his head in pain. ‘Anyway… here they are!’ He pulled a wad of tickets out of his pocket. ‘Everyone queue up, and I’ll give you your ticket!’
Mia barged to the front of the queue, almost falling over in her ridiculous pink high heels. ‘Where’s my ticket? Gimme it now!’
Phoenix searched through the stack and handed her a ticket. Diego was next in line.
‘I’m still not happy about you stealing my credit card for this, by the way…’ he grumbled, sipping some coffee as he received his ticket.
‘Out of the way, you’re blocking the queue!’ Phoenix said rudely. Diego sighed and moved away to let Ema come forwards and take her ticket.
‘This is so exciting! A real skiing holiday! I just can’t wait!’ she babbled excitedly. Pearl was next in line.
‘Mr Nick? Why are we coming on Mystic Maya’s holiday?’ she asked, ‘What if she wants to spend time with her…. Special someone?’
‘Hey! I though I was supposed to be her special someone!’ Phoenix said.
‘No, Mr Edgeworth is her special someone now. He takes much better care of her than you, Mr Nick. Besides, you have Mystic Iris!’
Iris giggled and blew Phoenix a kiss, coming to collect her ticket. Franziska whipped her out of the way.
‘Is there a ticket for me, Phoenix Wright?’ she snapped.
‘Ummm… yes!’ Phoenix said in surprise, ‘Whoa, I can’t believe I actually bothered to buy you a ticket, Franziska von Karma! What was I thinking?’
‘Don’t call people by their full name, Mr Phoenix Wright, it’s rude!’ Franziska whipped her way past everyone and back to her suitcase.
‘Thanks for this, pal, I really appreciate it!’ Gumshoe said, ‘I’ve never been on a real holiday before… although there was one time when I camped out in my garden…’
‘Only a foolish fool’s fool sleeps in a foolish tent!’ Franziska sneered, with a crack of her whip.
‘Nah, I couldn’t afford a tent… I just slept out on the grass, pal! When I woke up, there was a dead beetle in my ear! Best breakfast I ever had, pal!’
Dahlia came and snatched her ticket out of Phoenix’s hand, then barged past everyone to stand next to Pearl, who she’d become quite friendly with lately.
‘Erm… Iris?’ Phoenix said, ‘Are you sure it’s a good idea for your evil twin to be friends with little Pearls?’
‘Oh, Dahlia’s not that bad!’ Iris said sweetly, ‘I’m sure she’s got over the whole ‘killing’ thing now, anyway! It was just a phase she was going through!’
‘If you say so…’ Phoenix muttered. He heard a familiar gay voice coming from behind him. ‘Oh no… not Larry!’
‘Nick, daaaarling! Got my ticket, babes?’
‘Sorry, Larry… I… um… ‘forgot’ to get you a ticket…. Heh heh heh…..!’ he laughed nervously as Larry walked off looking disappointed.
‘But Feenie!’ Iris said, ‘If you didn’t get Larry a ticket, who is that last one for?’
Larry turned around, looking hopeful.
‘Oh, this is for Danny Defendo,’ said Phoenix, ‘There was a special offer to get a free ticket, but I didn’t wanna waste it on Larry, so I bought Danny one instead!’
‘Good thing I’m here, then!’ said Danny, walking down the street with a suitcase in his hand.
‘Danny! Are you psychic or something?’ said Ema, ‘I’d sure like to study a psychic person!’
‘No, I was just hoping you’d invite me along, so I packed just in case!’ he explained, ‘Ah look – the taxis are here!’

It took several taxis to transport them all to the airport. As they got onto the plane, Phoenix found his mind wandering to Maya, who was already in Switzerland… what was she doing right now, he wondered? Skiing? Having a snowball fight with Edgeworth? Enjoying the mountain scenery?
Nah, knowing Maya, she’d be scoffing a burger in the ski lodge restaurant, Phoenix thought to himself.
He had guessed correctly. Right at that moment, Maya was tucking into a Swiss Special Burger, made from a rare endangered species of Alpine wolf. She was planning to stay in the burger bar all day, as she knew Edgeworth was violently sick whenever he smelt burgers, and this was an ideal way to get rid of him. She really couldn’t wait until everyone else turned up…

It was lunchtime when they arrived, although Maya had already eaten enough calories to last a month. She had just gulped down yet another burger when she heard a commotion coming from the reception area. There was only one person who could be causing all that trouble…
‘Phoenix…’ Maya murmured. Sure enough, Phoenix was causing chaos at the check-in desk. He’d decided to bring Morgan the snake as a nice surprise for Maya, and she had escaped her basket and was slithering all over the floor, terrifying the staff and other guests.
‘Can’t you catch it, Franziska?’ Phoenix squealed, climbing up onto the desk, ‘You bought that thing in the first place!’
‘You let it escape, Phoenix!’ Ema pointed out. She was stood on a chair whilst trying to figure out a way to scientifically capture Morgan, without getting bitten.
Mia screamed as the snake snapped around her high heels. Diego quickly picked her up and lifted her to safety, putting her on top of a rack of brochures.
‘Darling! The snake is behind you!’ she yelped. Morgan slithered up Diego’s leg and into his hair.
‘No! No! My hair, my gorgeous hair!’ he yelled, falling to the floor and rolling around like an idiot.
A man walked into the room to see what was going on; a man wearing a pinky-red coloured ski suit. He reached down and plucked the snake straight out of Diego’s hair, then threw it across the room. He aimed perfectly; Morgan landed right in her basket, and the lid slammed shut on top of her.
‘Wow! Mr Edgeworth, I’m impressed!’ Ema said, getting down from the chair, ‘If only I’d taken a photo!’
‘Well, I always was very good with snakes!’ he said, ‘Now, there’s something I’d like to ask you all. WHY THE HECK HAVE YOU FOLLOWED ME ON MY ROMANTIC HOLIDAY WITH MAYA!?’
Phoenix gulped.

It had all happened very quickly. Edgeworth had punched Phoenix in the face, and Maya arrived from the burger bar shortly afterwards to see Phoenix crying. Edgeworth had dragged her off in a strop, so everyone else decided to go and check out the cabin where they would be staying.
‘Whoa, it’s pretty big!’ said Gumshoe, ‘The bathroom alone is bigger than my whole apartment!’
‘Well, I thought I’d splash the cash and get us a nice place to stay,’ said Phoenix, ‘After all, it’s not like I was spending my own money!’
Diego threw a mug of hot coffee at him.
‘Ow! No! It burns!’
Everybody laughed as Phoenix ran around with coffee pouring down his face. Only Iris ran forwards to guide him into the bathroom.
‘Come on, Feenie darling, let’s get you cleaned up!’

Meanwhile, Maya was back in her own cabin, feeling miserable.
‘Miles, PLEASE can’t we go and see them?’ she said, ‘I’m sure they didn’t mean any harm by coming here…’
‘But they’ve ruined everything! How can it be a romantic getaway for just the two of us, when all the things I wanted to get away from have followed us here?’
‘Hey, don’t be so mean!’ said Maya, ‘Surely you don’t hate them that much?’
‘No, I don’t…but… but… they’ve spoilt the whole romanticness!’
‘Romanticness isn’t even a real word, silly. I’m going to find their cabin – whether you like it or not!’ Maya got up and left Edgeworth all alone, feeling extra grumpy.

Ding Dong!
Pearl ran to answer the door, hoping that Mystic Maya had come to see them. Sure enough, her beloved cousin was stood there in a ski suit, a pair of skis tucked under her arm.
‘Pearly!’ she cried, hugging Pearl tightly.
‘Yay, Mystic Maya!’ Pearl squealed, ‘Everyone’s unpacking right now, I’ll show you around our special holiday house!’
She dragged Maya into the cabin, instructing her to put down her skis on the sofa.
‘But Pearly, I was hoping we could all do some skiing…’ she said, ‘Besides, I really don’t need a tour of the cabin, it’s exactly the same as mine only bigger!’
‘Of course you need a tour, Mystic Maya!’ Pearl said, ‘Otherwise you won’t know where all our bedrooms are!’ She started dragging her along by the arm. Maya sighed and let Pearl lead her around the house.
‘This is Detective Ema’s room!’ Pearl said. Ema was laying out her portable science kit on the dressing table.
‘Maya! Hi!’ Ema said, waving, ‘Is Edgeworth OK? He seemed pretty annoyed…’
‘Oh, he’s sulking right now,’ Maya said, ‘But he’ll get over it!’
Next Pearl took her to Franziska’s room which was next door. As soon as they set foot inside, they got whipped right back out again. Franziska whipped the door and it slammed shut behind them.
‘Ow!’ Pearl moaned, ‘Come on, let’s go to the next room…’
Next was Gumshoe’s. He was folding up a pair of underpants in the corner.
‘Oh, hi pal!’ he called, ‘I’m just folding my underpants – they’re my only pair, so I want them to look nice!’
‘Your… only pair?’ said Maya, ‘Then what about the pants you’re wearing at the moment?’
‘Huh? Oh, I only wear pants for special occasions, pal!’
‘Ew…’ Maya said, backing out of the room.
Soon they came to Mia and Diego’s room.
‘Pearly, I really think we should leave!’ Maya said, trying to pull Pearl away when she saw what Mia and Diego were up to on their big double bed.
‘No, let’s say hi!’ said Pearl, ‘Mystic Mia! Mister Diego! I’m glad you two are having fun!’
There was no reply from either of them.
‘Pearly, come on!’
‘Isn’t it nice that they can be with their special someone during their holiday?’ Pearl sighed happily, gazing at them.
Maya yanked Pearl out of the room and slammed the door shut.
They walked down the corridor a bit further.
‘This one is Mystic Iris and Mister Nick’s room,’ Pearl said, knocking on the door.
‘Pearly, how come you didn’t bother knocking for anyone else?’ Maya asked.
‘Well, Mister Nick and Mystic Iris are in love! I can’t just walk in on them, they need their privacy!’ Pearl explained.
‘Never mind Mia and Diego…’ Maya mumbled. As no one had answered the door, she opened it up to find Phoenix and Iris sat on the bed, kissing.
‘You’re the best girlfriend ever, Iris!’ Phoenix was saying. He suddenly noticed Maya and pushed Iris onto the floor.
‘Hi there, Maya!’ he said, grinning and waving, looking slightly like a clown.
‘Hello, Nick…’ Maya said half-heartedly. Something didn’t feel right… something about the way he acted when he thought he was alone with Iris. Maya had been sure that he didn’t like her that much, but now… what if he really DID have feelings for Iris, and he wasn’t just pretending? Would he still want Maya as his secret lover?
‘Come on, Pearly…’ Maya sighed, taking Pearl’s hand and heading for the living room, ‘Let’s go and wait for the others to finish unpacking.’

Finally everyone was ready to go skiing. There was still no sign of Edgeworth as they all walked across to the ski rental shop.
‘I bet he’s sobbing into his ruffle as we speak,’ Maya said, ‘He was pretty angry that you guys all came on holiday too. But who cares?’
‘Mystic Maya! Don’t you care for Mister Edgeworth at all?’ Pearl said, ‘He’s your special someone! You should share in his sorrows!’
‘Nah, if he wants to be grumpy, it’s his own problem! He’s not gonna stop me from having fun with my best friends!’
‘Awww!’ said Iris, ‘Maya considers us to be her best friends! That’s so sweet, isn’t it Feenie?’
Maya narrowed her eyes; she certainly didn’t consider Iris to be a best friend, but she wasn’t going to say that out loud.

Maya had already rented some skis, but everyone else needed to get some too. All around the shop, they were trying to pick out the colours and styles they liked best. Maya had taken Ema to a rack in the corner where they had Steel Samurai and Pink Princess skis. Phoenix chose some disgusting bogey-green ones, which he said was his new favourite colour. Iris chose some pretty pink skis, while Mia got Diego to pay the shopkeeper to have some custom-made with her name on it, which took quite a while longer and annoyed everybody.
‘Excuse me, where may I find the children’s ski selection?’ Pearl asked the shopkeeper politely.
‘Sorry, kid, we don’t do children’s skis here,’ the shopkeeper said, ‘This resort’s for adults. You can play in the kiddies room.’
‘The… kiddies room?’ Pearl said, her eyes filling with tears, ‘B-but I want to go skiing with Mystic Maya!’
Maya had heard the conversation and rushed over to comfort Pearl.
‘I’m sorry, Pearly! I didn’t realise they only had adult skis here! But I’m sure you’ll have lots of fun with the other children…’
‘But I w-won’t know anybody!’ Pearl sobbed, ‘I-it’s so scary!’
Suddenly Dahlia popped up next to them.
‘I’ll come to the kiddies room with you, Pearl!’ she said, ‘I bet it’s way more fun than those crazy skiing slopes with all the naughty grown-ups, right?’
‘Ok!’ Pearl’s tears instantly dried, ‘It’s alright, Mystic Maya - Dahlia and I will have lots of fun all by ourselves!’
‘Mmm…’ Maya said, worrying that Pearl was getting too friendly with Dahlia – she really didn’t like the idea of her sweet innocent cousin hanging out with an ex-killer. But Dahlia was quite immature nowadays and often behaved like a child herself, so maybe it would just be like Pearl actually had a friend her own age for once.
‘Ok, why don’t you two run along and play?’ she said, hugging Pearl goodbye.
‘Yay! Kiddies room, here we come!’ Dahlia squealed. Maya rolled her eyes, hardly able to believe that this childish person had once been an evil murderer.

After a ride on the ski lift – which Phoenix nearly fell off of at least eight times – they were at the top of the ski slope. There were some skiing lessons about to begin, so they showed their ski resort holiday passes and got split into groups based on their experience. Phoenix, of course, was in the beginner’s group. Iris was devastated that she had to be separated from her darling Feenie, as she was already an experienced skier from living in the mountains at Hazakura temple. Maya was quite good at skiing too, since Kurain often got snow in the winter. To their surprise, Edgeworth turned up at the last minute. Maya felt a pang of annoyance as he joined her in the intermediate group.
‘Hello, my pretty potted plant,’ he said, kissing her on the lips, ‘I’m sorry about being so unfriendly earlier. I forgive you completely. As for the others…’ He glared at everyone.
‘Aw, come on, can’t you just try being nice to them?’ Maya said, ‘After all, you don’t want to ruin the holiday by being unfriendly!’
Edgeworth just pouted.

Dahlia was really starting to enjoy herself in the kiddies room. Every so often the children would be checked on by a middle aged woman called Mrs Green, who was supposed to supervising them, but mostly nobody was watching them. At first the other children had been hogging all the toys, but Dahlia soon sorted them out by locking them in the Wendy house, so she and Pearl had the whole toy box to themselves.
‘Thank you very much, Mystic Dahlia!’ said Pearl happily, ‘You are the best friend ever in the whole world!’
‘Come on, let’s play!’ Dahlia started emptying out all the toys onto the floor, making a huge mess.
‘Hey, you can’t tip all those out!’ a small child’s voice called from inside the Wendy house, ‘Mrs Green said that we’re not allowed to make a mess or she’ll call our mummies and daddies!’
‘Shut up, you! Me and Pearl don’t have a Mummy or a Daddy!’ Dahlia said, prodding the children through the window with a toy carrot.
‘Well, there’s my mother Morgan…’ Pearl began.
‘But she’s not here! So we can do what we want, OK?’ Dahlia said, picking up some toys and throwing them across the room. Pearl hesitated, then picked up a toy dog and threw it at the wall.
‘Wow! This is really fun!’ she said, throwing some more toys, ‘But isn’t it naughty for us to be doing this, Mystic Dahlia?’
‘Well, a little bit…’ Dahlia admitted, ‘But nobody needs to know about it! We can be as naughty as we want, Pearl!’ She threw a plastic potato at one of the children in the Wendy house; it hit them in the eye and they started crying.
‘Stop throwing things!’ squealed a little boy, ‘You’ll be in big trouble when Mrs Green comes in to check on us!’
‘Check on us? Ha!’ Dahlia sniggered, ‘We’ll just let you all out and blame it on you!’
A few more of the children started to cry.
‘Oh dear!’ said Pearl, feeling bad, ‘Won’t we get in trouble?’
They heard footsteps coming down the corridor outside.
‘Mrs Green is coming!’ Pearl whispered in terror. Dahlia quickly unlocked the Wendy house and tossed out all the children onto the floor as the door swung open.
‘What is going on here!?’ Mrs Green demanded.
Dahlia winked at Pearl. ‘Everyone except for me and Pearl just started fighting!’ she said in a sweet voice, fluttering her eyelashes, ‘They tipped out all the toys onto the floor! We told them to stop, but they threw things at us! We were really scared…’
Pearl stared at her in shock. She couldn’t believe it… Dahlia was lying to a grown up! But Dahlia just gave her another wink.
‘Oh, you poor things!’ said Mrs Green sympathetically, patting Pearl’s shoulder, ‘Some children are just so violent! Now, can you tell me which children started the fighting? I’ll need to punish them…’
The other children started to protest, saying that Dahlia had locked them in the Wendy house and thrown potatoes at them.
‘Hmm, is this true?’ Mrs Green asked Dahlia, ‘And are you even a child? You look kinda big to me…’
‘Yes, I’m only little girl!’ said Dahlia, ‘Everyone always says I’m big for my age. Maybe that’s why they always pick on me…’ She sobbed, quite realistically, pointing to the children who had told her to stop throwing toys.
‘Oh dear, don’t cry! I’ll take these naughty children away,’ said Mrs Green, ‘Come on, brats!’ The children tried to explain that Dahlia had been causing all the trouble as they were dragged away.
Dahlia let out a snort of laughter as soon as they had gone. ‘Nice one, Pearl!’ She gave Pearl a high five before shutting the remaining children in the toy box.

That evening, everyone met in the ski lodge restaurant for dinner. Maya purposefully made sure she ordered burgers, so Edgeworth had to sit at the opposite side of the table in case he became ill.
‘How was your day in the kiddies room, Pearly?’ Maya asked, munching on some kind of endangered animal in the form of a burger.
‘It was very fun!’ said Pearl, ‘We had so much fun! Dahlia is my BFFL!’
‘Huh? What’s Beef Feff Fell?’ asked Phoenix.
Dahlia rolled her eyes. ‘Duh, it stands for Best Friends For Life! Everyone should know that, even silly grown-ups like you!’
‘Yes! Silly grown-up!’ Pearl blew a raspberry at Phoenix.
‘Pearl!’ Maya whispered, ‘Don’t be so naughty!’
‘But Mystic Maya, Dahlia taught me how to blow raspberries and I really wanted to try it out on someone!’
‘Dahlia, stop being such a bad influence!’ said Maya, ‘Pearl is a nice, sensible girl, and I don’t want you to turn her into a rude brat!’
‘Whatever!’ said Dahlia in a very bratty voice, sticking out her tongue.
‘And since when did you start acting like such a little kid?’ Maya said, ‘You’re a fully grown adult, Dahlia! Can’t you be more grown up like your twin sister?’ She looked over to Iris, who was singing a song about how much she loved her ‘Feenie-Pie’ and spelling out his name in alphabetti spaghetti.
‘Ok, so she’s not very mature either… but still, you could at least TRY to act your age!’
Maya noticed that Dahlia and Pearl were completely ignoring her; they were making daisy chains.
‘Where did you get those daisies from?’ Ema asked, ‘We’re in the middle of a snowy mountain! There aren’t even any daisies growing up here!’
Dahlia and Pearl both shrugged at exactly the same time.
‘Ok… I’m seriously worried about those two…’ said Maya. She kept glancing at them as she ate her sixth burger, but they were now playing rock paper scissors and still ignored her.
‘Loosen up, Maya!’ Phoenix said, ‘We’re on holiday! You might as well let Pearl be a bit mischievous for once in her life!’
‘Ok… let’s just hope she goes back to normal when we get home,’ Maya said, with a sinking feeling that Pearl wouldn’t ever be normal again, as she was now burning napkins on one of the candles that was placed on the table, and laughing hysterically.
‘Hey, Maya!’ Phoenix suddenly whispered to Maya, passing her the menu.
‘Nick, I’ve already ordered my food!’ she whispered back.
‘No, there’s a message on it!’
Maya turned it over and noticed Phoenix’s messy scrawl of handwriting. ‘Nick! You shouldn’t write on the menu!’
‘Just read it!’ he mouthed.
She tried to make out the badly-written message. It was especially hard to read as he’d written it right over the top of the list of beverages. It seemed to say:
‘Deer Maya,
Meat me at eleven clocks outside my caravan,
Love Nike.’
She smiled fondly at his terrible spelling mistakes, amused that he couldn’t even spell ‘Nick’. He probably meant his cabin, not his ‘caravan’, but it was the thought that counted. Besides, she was pleased that he wanted to meet her… did this mean that he really did like her more than Iris?

It was eleven O’clock -or ‘eleven clocks’ as Phoenix had called it – and Maya was waiting outside his cabin, shivering slightly in the cold. The minutes went by and she got colder and colder.
‘Typical Nick…’ she muttered until her breath, ‘He’s nearly ten minutes late!’
A shadowy figure came out of the front door, heading straight towards her. Maya shone her torch towards him, lighting up his face.
‘Nick! You finally came!’ she rushed forwards and hugged him, glad for the extra body heat against her own.
‘Hi, Maya!’ he said, kissing her forehead, ‘Brrr, it’s chilly! And dark! Did we really have to meet so late at night?’
‘Hey, you chose to meet at this time!’ she laughed, ‘You are so dumb sometimes, Nick! Besides, eleven O’clock is hardly late at all!’
‘Well, I normally go to bed at seven,’ he said, ‘Anyway, do you want to come inside? I thought we’d climb through my bedroom window, just to make it more exciting and secretive!’
‘But Nick, isn’t Iris in there?’
‘Nah, she’s in the bathroom. I ‘accidentally’ locked her in there, so we’ll have the room to ourselves!’
Phoenix led Maya round the back of the cabin to a window, which he said was definitely his. It was unlocked so they opened it wide and climbed in. The room was dark and Maya shone her torch around.
‘Nick! Why is there a pair of fluffy leopard print handcuffs on your bedroom floor?’ Maya gasped, taking a closer look, ‘They have ‘MIA’ written on them in diamonds! Nick, what have you been doing in here with my sister!?’ She angrily shone the torch in his face.
‘Hey, it wasn’t me!’ Phoenix said, looking around the room. Something didn’t seem right…
‘Diego, is that you?’ Mia’s voice said from somewhere in the darkness.
‘No, kitten, I’m right here next to you!’ Diego’s voice said.
‘Then… who’s making all that noise?’ Mia asked.
Maya reached across to the wall and found the light switch. She flicked it on, lighting up the whole room, then noticed they were in Mia and Diego’s room, and both of them were totally naked. Maya screamed and dived out of the window into the snow. However, Phoenix jumped at the wrong angle and got his backside wedged in the window. As he attempted to scramble out, his trousers got caught. Phoenix slipped outside into the cold night air, but his trousers and underwear fell back into Mia and Diego’s room, leaving him stood outside half naked!
‘Nick, are you OK?’ Maya said in concern, as there had been a loud thud when he hit the ground. As he stood up, she shone the torch on him. It was not a pretty sight; Maya threw the torch to one side, covering her eyes. ‘Phoenix, your legs have gone blue!’
‘Well, it’s p-pretty c-cold out here…’ he said, teeth chattering. He turned to the window but noticed that somebody had locked it.
‘Hey! Gimme back my trousers!’ He banged on the window but the lights had been turned off and he couldn’t see a thing. He picked up Maya’s torch and shone it inside. Mia had put on some underwear now, and had taken his trousers and was attaching them to the wardrobe door with her fluffy handcuffs.
‘Oi, give those back!’ he bellowed. Mia laughed at him.
‘Don’t expect to get these back for a while!’ She slipped the key inside her bra and closed the curtains.

Maya politely averted her eyes as they climbed into another window. Luckily this time it was actually Phoenix’s room they climbed into. He got out a new pair of knickers from his chest of drawers and pulled them on, then sat down on the bed.
‘I don’t believe it!’ he whimpered, ‘Those were my only trousers, Maya!’
‘At least you have another pair of underpants…’ she said, ‘Didn’t you think to bring more than one pair of trousers, though?’
‘Nope!’
‘Hmm… there’s only one solution!’ said Maya forcefully.
‘Are we going to rescue my trousers?’ Phoenix said hopefully.
‘No! You’ll have to borrow someone else’s trousers!’
‘Oh…’ Phoenix looked disappointed, ‘Why can’t we just get MY trousers back from Mia? I’m sure if we asked her nicely…’
‘No, Nick, that won’t work,’ said Maya, ‘Knowing my sister, she won’t give in that easily after we intruded in her bedroom. Plus she likes teasing you.’
‘Yeah, she sure does…’ Phoenix agreed, ‘Well, why don’t we steal the key to the handcuffs!’
‘No way! Did you see where she put the key, Nick?’
‘Yep! It’s just inside her bra, I could easily reach in and…’
‘No! Nick, you are NOT putting your hand into my sister’s bra! ESPECIALLY not while she’s wearing it!’ Maya said, with her hands on her hips.
‘Oh, Ok…’ Phoenix mumbled, ‘Well… I’m sure someone will let me borrow some tomorrow…’
They heard Iris shouting from in the bathroom.
‘Uh oh, someone will probably let her out soon. Let’s just make the most of our time together for now, OK?’ said Phoenix. Maya nodded, then sat on the bed and kissed him.

The next few days had a similar routine. Everyone went skiing – even Phoenix was gradually improving – and they would always have dinner together in the restaurant. Pearl and Dahlia spent every day tormenting the poor children in the kiddies room. Edgeworth noticed that Phoenix and Maya seemed to be getting closer and closer, but he decided he was probably just being paranoid – after all, Maya loved him, right? Little did he know that the two of them secretly met every night at 11 O’clock – they would spend their evenings in the ski lodge bar, while Edgeworth was fast asleep, completely unaware of what his girlfriend was doing.

One evening they decide to all go out for a walk and gaze out at the snowy scenery.
‘Why do we have to go on a boring walk?’ Phoenix grumbled, ‘I don’t wanna look at boring scenery!’
‘Oh Nick, you look so silly in those trousers!’ Maya laughed. Phoenix frowned. It wasn’t HIS fault that Detective Gumshoe was the only one who had been willing to lend him some trousers. Sure, they were several sizes too big and fell down a lot, but at least he HAD some trousers to wear, since his own pair was still handcuffed to Mia’s wardrobe.
‘Do you think your sister will ever give my trousers back?’ Phoenix asked with a sigh.
‘Probably not,’ said Maya, ‘Speaking of which… where IS Mia? And where’s Diego?’
‘I last saw the two of them trailing behind everyone else,’ said Edgeworth, ‘It seems that Mia decided to wear her pink high-heels out on this walk, so she was having trouble keeping up.’
‘Oh right,’ Maya said, ‘Trust Mia to wear high-heels on a walk through the snow! Sometimes I can’t believe she ever passed the Bar Exam back when she became a lawyer!’
‘Huh? What’s a Bar Ham?’ Phoenix asked.
Maya rolled her eyes. ‘Ok, I’m not sure how you passed the bar exam either!’

Mia had given up walking altogether. She was sat on a snow-covered log, with Diego next to her massaging her sore feet.
‘Kitten, maybe next time you should wear some more appropriate shoes,’ he said, ‘These heels look lovely on you, but they’re not much good for walking in!’
‘But appropriate shoes are always so ugly!’ Mia whined, ‘Besides, there won’t BE a next time. I don’t like walking!’
‘Yes, but you’ve got to admit this scenery is very lovely,’ said Diego, ‘Not as lovely as you of course, Kitten!’
Mia looked out at the mountain landscape stretched out in front of them.
‘Yes, you’re right, it IS very lovely,’ she said, ‘Doesn’t scenery like this just make you want to… get married?’
Diego gasped. ‘You mean… you want to get married!’
‘Yeah, I guess I do! What do you think?’
‘Well, I sure wouldn’t mind getting married either…!’
‘So, Diego, who would you want to get married to?’ Mia asked.
Diego raised one eyebrow, wondering if she was joking.
‘Well, Kitten, first tell me who YOU want to get married to!’
Mia thought for a moment. ‘Hmm… I was thinking of Orlando Bloom. Or perhaps Johnny Depp, but maybe he’s a bit too old…’
Diego stared at her in shock. Was she seriously thinking about marrying film stars?
‘But Kitten! Why marry them, when you have someone willing to marry you right here?’
‘Who do you mean? I think all the men who know me would be willing to marry me…’
‘What I mean is…’ Diego began. He crouched down onto one knee and pulled out a ring. ‘Mia Fey, will you accept my hand in marriage?’
Mia gasped; she really hadn’t been expecting this when she brought up the subject of marriage.
‘Umm… OK! I don’t see why not!’
Diego grinned and slipped the ring onto her finger.
‘Were you planning to propose today?’ Mia asked, ‘After all, you had the ring with you…’
‘No, I just always carry a ring in case I ever want to ask you to marry me,’ he said, ‘In fact I have two more alternative rings in my pocket, which I always have with me in case you don’t like the first one.’
‘No, this one is fine!’ Mia said, looking at the ring on her finger; it was white gold and had a huge diamond set into it, ‘But can I have the other two anyway? You can never have too many rings!’
‘Ok,’ said Diego. He pulled out two more ring boxes and handed them to Mia. ‘So, when do you want the wedding to be?’
‘How about… Wednesday?’ she suggested.
‘But Kitten, it’s Saturday today! That would only give us four days to prepare!’
‘So what? You’ve got your credit card, right? Plus all our friends are already here, so we can just get married at the ski resort! I’ll go shopping with Maya and get some dresses, and you can sort out the rest! Simple!’
Diego sighed. ‘Alright, Wednesday it is! But I’m only doing this because I love you so much, OK?’
‘Yippee!’ Mia squealed, ‘Diego, you’re the best! I love you too, honey!’
She gave him a huge kiss, then put on her high heels and skipped off to tell everyone.
‘Um… Kitten? I thought your feet hurt too much to walk?’
‘Oh, they feel a lot better now! Hurry up, we need to tell everyone the good news!’

Marriage (I see that will happen soon)
Babies (After marriage maybe)
Divorce (Duh, after marriage)
Chocolate Factories (Looking forward to how that fits in)

“Oh my gosh… don’t I look AMAZING!?” Mia gasped, twirling in front of the mirror, “This wedding dress looks so hot on me! I KNEW it was a good idea to get married!”

“Um… Mia?” Maya asked, “Did you agree to marry Diego just so you could wear a wedding dress?”

“Well… mostly, I suppose…” she admitted, “But marriage is great for other reasons too! I mean… I get to walk up the aisle with everyone gazing at me… I get to have a huge party afterwards… and I have a lovely wedding ring!”

Maya sighed. “Mia. Do you realise that there are OTHER REASONS FOR GETTING MARRIED other than getting lots of attention?”

“Of course she does!” Pearl exclaimed, “Mystic Mia is in love! She just wants to get married to her special someone Mr Diego and they can live happily ever after!”

“Huh... whatever,” said Mia, smoothing down her hair, “Maya, do you think I should’ve curled it? Or is it too late to get out the tongs now? And where have all the other girls gone!? They are supposed to be here watching me and feeling jealous that they will never be as gorgeous as me!”

“Um… I think they got bored of watching you put on your fake eyelashes, Mia. You ARE wearing rather a lot... Anyway, I’m just concerned that you’re not marrying Diego for the right reasons!” said Maya. She sighed and sat down. “Oh well. I don’t suppose you’ll ever listen to me anyway…”

“Nope! I hardly ever pay attention to you anyway.” Mia stopped applying the millionth layer of mascara when she heard the sound of a horn beeping. “Aha! That must be our limo! Come on, bridesmaids, it’s wedding time! Tee hee hee!”

The wedding was taking place in a chapel near the ski resort, which Mia had instructed to be decorated with pink flowers and ribbons. She had also specifically instructed that all the men had to wear pink shirts and ties, as they were having a ‘pink theme’.

“Erm… Mr Godot? Are you sure that Miss Fey won’t kill you for not wearing pink, pal?” asked Gumshoe nervously.

“Of course not! I’ll wear whatever colour I like, it’s my wedding,” said Diego, who was dressed in a deep red waistcoat and crimson tie, “I look much more handsome and gorgeous in this colour anyway. I’m sure Mia will realise that as soon as she sees me!”

Edgeworth, who was the best man, was moping in the corner after Diego had forbidden him to wear his cravat.

“Oi, Edgey! Get out of that corner and keep an eye out for the limo!” shouted Diego, “She’ll be here any minute, and we still haven’t finished putting up the ribbons!”

“Too late…” Phoenix pointed to the pink limo pulling up outside the chapel.

“Ok, everyone into positions!” Diego yelled, “Hurry up!”

“This wedding is so foolishly unorganised that I feel as though I may vomit…” Franziska muttered, sitting down.

“Same here,” said Edgeworth, looking pale, “I hope Mia doesn’t notice that only half the room has ribbons in it, and that some of the flowers have died…”

The door burst open.

“Ta-da! I’m here!” Mia cried happily, “Get out of the way, Maya! I’m trying to walk down the aisle!”

“Um… but at the rehearsal we decided that Pearly and I would walk down in front of you…”

“Too bad, I changed my mind! Now, budge!”

Maya sighed and sat down next to Phoenix, who was near the back. Mia pushed Pearl to one side and skipped down the aisle.

“Diego! You… you… you…” she gasped suddenly, stopping in her tracks.

“I look incredibly attractive? I know, kitten!” he grinned, “Now, hurry up and get over here!”

“No! NO! I told you that everyone had to wear PINK! And where are all the ribbons I wanted? And these flowers are DEAD! The whole wedding is ruined!” Mia burst into tears and ran out of the chapel.

“I did warn you, pal…” said Gumshoe quietly.

“Grrr… I don’t believe this! She won’t marry me because I’m NOT WEARING PINK!?” Diego stormed out after her.

“Well, looks like they won’t be getting married after all,” said Phoenix, “I guess we might as well head over to the wedding reception and make the most of all the alcohol Diego ordered!”

“Woohoo! Let’s go!” said Maya, grabbing Phoenix’s arm and pulling him out of the chapel. Edgeworth glared in disgust.

“Look at them… running off to go and get drunk together…” he muttered to Franziska, “She supposed to be MY girlfriend! Doesn’t she get it? Grr!”

“Foolish Miles Edgeworth,” Franziska said, “Clearly, Maya Fey doesn’t want you any more. All she is interested in is Phoenix Wright…”

There was no sign of Diego as the wedding guests arrived at the hall where the reception taking place. However, Mia was already there, flirting with one of the waiters with a glass of pink champagne in her hand.

“Oh, hey there Maya!” she said, slightly drunkenly, “That wedding was great, wasn’t it?”

“Mia! You’ve only been gone a few minutes! How come you’re already so drunk that you can’t even remember what a disaster your wedding was?” said Maya.

“Let’s just say I’ve managed to drink a LOT of champagne very quickly!” said Mia, “Hmm, why don’t we turn on some music? This party is kinda boring!” She stumbled over to the stereo and turned on some cheesy music which she had planned for her and Diego to dance to later in the evening. “Nah, this is boring!” She giggled and changed it to some loud club music.

“Ow! This is hurting my ears…” Pearl said, shouting to be heard over the loud thumping of the stereo, “Mystic Maya, has Mystic Mia gone crazy?”

“No, of course not!” Maya reassured her, “I think she’s just… um… a little shaken up after what happened in the chapel!”

“Then why is she kissing the chef? Her special someone is Mr Diego! It’s all wrong!” Pearl suddenly started crying.

“Er… why don’t you go and play outside with Dahlia?” Maya shoved Pearl to the door, eager to get her out of the room, since Mia had just started stripping.

In the end they decided it would be best just to start the party without Diego, since he clearly wasn’t going to turn up, and Mia didn’t seem to care that she had ruined the whole day. By sunset, she had long since disappeared off into a store cupboard with the head chef, and the party was getting louder and wilder by the minute.

“Psst! Maya!”

Maya jumped as a voice hissed at her from underneath the buffet table. She shrieked as a hand grabbed her by the ankle and pulled her under the table, and was about to scream when Phoenix pressed a hand over her mouth.

“Nick!” she whispered, “Why do you always have to shock me like that? And what are you doing under here?”

“Oh, I thought it would be a good place to hide from Edgey,” he explained quietly, “Let’s hide under here for a while, OK?”

“Um… sure,” said Maya, “But what if Miles finds us? I’m still technically going out with him, remember?!”

“Don’t be silly, he won’t find us!” said Phoenix, “We’re way to sneaky for that! Now shut up and kiss me!”

“Oh, alright then…” Maya gave in and kissed him on the lips.

A few minutes later they were still snogging under the table when they saw a familiar pair of smart black shoes and pink trousered legs next to their faces.

“Uh oh!” Maya murmured, “We’d better stay quiet, otherwise he’ll find us under here and it will break his heart!”

“He’ll probably bite my head off, more like…” said Phoenix. The table creaked above their heads as Edgeworth started grabbing random pieces of food and piling it onto his plate. “Man, he sure eats a lot!”

Maya giggled loudly, before realising she’d given them away and clapping a hand over her mouth. “Oops…”

Edgeworth’s legs froze. Then he bent down and pulled back the table cloth to reveal Maya and Phoenix wrapped in each others’ arms under the table.

“PHOENIX WRIGHT, I AM GOING TO KILL YOU!” roared Edgeworth, grabbing Phoenix by his jacket collar and dragging him out.

“Uh… sorry Edgey, I kinda forgot that Maya was your girlfriend…”

“You liar! You knew she was mine, but you still go ahead and betray me like this! I hate you!” Edgeworth growled and launched himself onto Phoenix, whacking him with his fists. Phoenix pushed Edgeworth to one side, trying to escape, but Edgeworth threw himself back on top of him, clawing at Phoenix’s face.

Mia emerged from the store cupboard in her underwear to see the pair of them rolling out of the door, beating each other up and yelling swear words at each other.

“Oooh, a fight!” she said happily, “Maya, what happened?”

“It’s… a long story,” said Maya, watching worriedly as Phoenix and Edgeworth started wrestling each other out in the car park. She really didn’t feel like explaining right now; especially not to her annoying slutty sister.

Everyone hurried outside to where all the action was taking place, and formed a ring around the two fighting men.

“Go Mr Edgeworth!” Gumshoe bellowed, “Show him what you’re made of, sir!”

“Miles Edgeworth, you fool!” Franziska shouted, “Get up off of the ground and save at least some of your dignity!”

“Mister Nick! Please stop doing that, you are scaring me!” Pearl sobbed.

“Yay! Keep going, you two!” Mia squealed excitedly, “You’re doing great!”

Edgeworth and Phoenix ignored all of the shouting around them as they continued to fight. It was only when Maya ran in and shoved the two of them apart that they stopped.

“Stop it! Stop it right now!” she said, with tears in her eyes, “I really don’t want you two to be fighting over me! It’s ridiculous!”

“Well, you’d better choose one of us, then!” said Edgeworth, “Who do you want, Maya? Me… or HIM?” He pointed accusingly at Phoenix.

“Come on Maya! You know you like me more!” said Phoenix, who looked very pitiful lying on the ground with a black eye, blood running from his nose, and his spiky hair sticking up around his face.

There was a long, silent pause. Maya seemed to be thinking, and the two men gazed up at her hopefully.

“Choose them both!” said Mia, “You can just take advantage of them by making them share you! That’s what I’d do!”

“Shut up, Mia,” said Maya, “Believe it or not, I don’t actually want your advice. I’ve already made my choice.”

“Too bad, Wright,” Edgeworth sneered, “She’s clearly picked me!”

“No way, Edgey, she obviously likes me more!” Phoenix said.

They looked as though they were about to start fighting again, when Maya interrupted.

“I’ve decided…” she began, taking a deep breath, “That I don’t want either of you!”