Re: The vent station
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dimentiorules wrote:
The person who wrote the story might have gotten that detail wrong, but there's still the issues of my family making fun of me and making me an outcast.
In which case I'm torn between saying You have a shit family or Why do you care, it's your personal business, you don't need their 'approval' or anything like that.
It's an understandable fear to have, but overall you really shouldn't care too much.
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Re: The vent station
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dimentiorules wrote:
I read a story once about a person who got transgender surgery, and it stated that they couldn't feel arousal. The person who wrote the story might have gotten that detail wrong, but there's still the issues of my family making fun of me and making me an outcast.
Do you wish to be female because you are attracted to men? Or is it because you are simply dissatisfied with being male yourself? Some men who exhibit feminine-like characteristics wish to become female because of that as well. Do you view yourself to be more feminine than masculine?
I can't even begin to imagine what you must be going through because I have never been in a situation even closely resembling yours. However, if you feel that you truly want to get the surgery; you should do so regardless of what anyone tells you. The final say on the matter will always be yours.
Personally for me, I don't have any problems with being male because that's how nature and genetics created me. It's how I was born, so that's how I view myself. Of course, that's just me. I apologize if I'm not being much help. It's just my own personal opinion.
Re: The vent station
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However I learned about a few developmental mistakes which can mess up the hormone balance in the body then so I'm a little more open to it now.
I'm also getting increasingly frustrated at a world that's not as eccentric or energetic as me. A bunch of my friends just seem so lethargic towards any activity these days and everyone I meet at my new job seems so....mundane but ugh
perhaps I'm just too unusual.
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Re: The vent station
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Re: The vent station
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dimentiorules wrote:
Actually, I'm not attracted to men. If I was female, I'd be a lesbian. I want to become female because I feel more feminine than masculine, and I have always identified more with women than with other men. I already look somewhat feminine, with hardly any muscle definition and somewhat feminine facial features. The primary reason I don't want to have surgery is actually not because of being judged, but because transgender surgery hasn't been perfected yet, as you can't reproduce or anything like that. To be honest, I really don't care what my family thinks, it's just that I only have one true friend, and I'm worried that he'll abandon me. I'd rather stay male than lose my only true friend.
If he abandons you he isn't a true friend.
Re: The vent station
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dimentiorules wrote:
Actually, I'm not attracted to men. If I was female, I'd be a lesbian. I want to become female because I feel more feminine than masculine, and I have always identified more with women than with other men. I already look somewhat feminine, with hardly any muscle definition and somewhat feminine facial features. The primary reason I don't want to have surgery is actually not because of being judged, but because transgender surgery hasn't been perfected yet, as you can't reproduce or anything like that. To be honest, I really don't care what my family thinks, it's just that I only have one true friend, and I'm worried that he'll abandon me. I'd rather stay male than lose my only true friend.
Well then, I guess you can't do the surgery then with our current technology. It's like amputees wanting to get a surgery to fully restore their arms. Sure, you can get a prosthetic limb; but it isn't a real arm with feeling.
If this truly is a problem for you, I'd say wait 10-20 years for a more "perfected" surgery to be developed. Just know that it'll be a very slow and probably expensive process.
And Emiko's right when she says that your friend isn't your friend if he'll abandon you. Unfortunately, we live in a very judgmental society. It's the same no matter what country you go to. I don't even think it's limited to humans. If a certain animal looks or acts differently, the group will likely ostracize it. I really feel for you situation, but at this point there's nothing you can really do. Hopefully you'll meet someone some day, and your life won't be as lonely.
Re: The vent station
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TopHatProfessor1014 wrote:
And Emiko's right when she says that your friend isn't your friend if he'll abandon you. Unfortunately, we live in a very judgmental society. It's the same no matter what country you go to. I don't even think it's limited to humans. If a certain animal looks or acts differently, the group will likely ostracize it.
I wish I could use this quote for my signature but it's too long.
Re: The vent station
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Being ignored.
I erased the 5 paragraph rant about a circle jerk and why it seems like I only get negative attention.
But let's just say I almost hit submit and went full potato, I'm going to go to sleep before I say something awful.
Re: The vent station
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Quote:
Actually, I'm not attracted to men. If I was female, I'd be a lesbian. I want to become female because I feel more feminine than masculine, and I have always identified more with women than with other men.
Sorry, this just sounds very like Kanji from Persona 4 to me... just thought I'd mention that.
As for the fact that sex change surgery would make you incapable of reproducing, well, I have to say I doubt that even in 10-20 years it'll be that much better. I guess medicine will eventually create... the artificial uterus... which might help male-to-female transgenders for wanting to have biological children themselves. But I doubt they'll manage to somehow get a female-to-male transgender to be capable of producing functioning sperm. Unless they somehow... I dunno... cut the sperm sacks from some other guy and implant it. Although then the DNA in the Sperm will not be yours, so it will technically still not be a biological child...
I have nothing against transgenders.
As mentioned, my family has two themselves. I just feel that if they don't feel comfortable or incredibly trapped inside the "wrong" body, having a sex change may be a big help to make them feel better. But I also think that they have to live with the limitations that a "fake" sex change would bring. If you turn yourself female, you have to live with the fact that you can't squeeze babies out of your new vagina without an existing uterus inside. (Only way that may work is if you are a man who already had, by accident of nature, a uterus inside the body)
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Re: The vent station
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Adrian in black wrote:
Sjibbey wrote:
Not to mention I'm 22 years old now. I'd expect an adult discussion to settle our differences but that wildcard still appears from time to time.
Are you still living under her roof?
I'm in my last year of University. It's quite close to my home so I planned on staying home until I finished and got a job.
Face your emptiness don't be afraid. The danger is often smaller than your fear.
Re: The vent station
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dimentiorules wrote:
Actually, I'm not attracted to men. If I was female, I'd be a lesbian. I want to become female because I feel more feminine than masculine, and I have always identified more with women than with other men. I already look somewhat feminine, with hardly any muscle definition and somewhat feminine facial features. The primary reason I don't want to have surgery is actually not because of being judged, but because transgender surgery hasn't been perfected yet, as you can't reproduce or anything like that. To be honest, I really don't care what my family thinks, it's just that I only have one true friend, and I'm worried that he'll abandon me. I'd rather stay male than lose my only true friend.
Ouch, know a very tiny bit how you feel. For a long time in my chidhood I was persuade that I was a guy in a girls body since I shared more characteristic with them. Also my view of the men world seemed way better than the women's world. (My family is very traditional with the men working and the women staying at the house raising children.) Also I lacked female role model. So when I got my first period it was a shock.
I'm those who think that if people cannot accept who you really are, they do not love you. Loved one (friend family, lover) should be able to accept that you are not comfortable in your current state and they should accept the solution that can lead you to hapiness. Seriously, anyone has the right to be happy. As for the other SCREW THEM. If you are afraid of losing your friend I guess it's because he's against transgender? If not, if he's a true friend, then he shouldn't be too much bothered in the end.
We had a small debate here about trangender and sex change and I was amazed by how much hapiness, relieve and freedom it bring to people. I never knew they lived in such sadness. Hell some even suicide because of it! I think you should do what will make you happy to be alive and free of any burden.
As for the surgery, I do not know a lot about that, but I doubt people will be able to perfect it perfect in this live. Except if they can implant you a fake uterus, sadly you will probably never bear a child. The only thing I can say is, if you want a child but do not mind that your lover bear him, there is always the possibility to freeze sperm sample. That way he would be yours too.
Courage Dimentiorules!
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Re: The vent station
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Emiko Nabile Gale wrote:
TopHatProfessor1014 wrote:
And Emiko's right when she says that your friend isn't your friend if he'll abandon you. Unfortunately, we live in a very judgmental society. It's the same no matter what country you go to. I don't even think it's limited to humans. If a certain animal looks or acts differently, the group will likely ostracize it.
I wish I could use this quote for my signature but it's too long.
Glad you liked it. I don't mind if you have to shorten it.
Re: The vent station
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It just didn't make any sense to me, the money per month sure I get that, then Council Tax is absurd amounts and I presume it's per year but £48k a year for a MIDDLE band I...I assume I'm doing something wrong because that just seems impossible so I must be misunderstanding.
Most simple jobs I've seen maybe break out about 15-16k a year. Then I think Council tax can't be split, if you share with someone it doesn't alleviate the burden (in fact you get a discount if you live alone).
I have a job a girlfriend of 3 years and I really wanna make the next step in my life. A sad part of me even resents my best friend for this, his parents bought him and his brother a small cozy flat for his student life and a source of income working for them at their bookfair which was prime in the city and other people who utilised their students loans to get by. It seems most people I know were just given their flat opportunities as hell if I understand it. My folks are charging me money and constantly getting on my nerves and it irks me being so far away from my friends that my social life is tiny. I'd also love a place for my girlfriend to come into but GRAAAGH!
I can hardly find any advice on this for taking first steps and things like that.#
I am further reassured that the Government should make a mandatory class in finances and practical living to teach you all about that crap before you are just dropped in it.
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Re: The vent station
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Re: The vent station
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Re: The vent station
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I'm Blak, and I have shit taste.
Re: The vent station
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Re: The vent station
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Blak The Great wrote:
Here in America I had a mandatory econ class in high school, but it was more on macroeconomics (focused on how big things affect the economy as a whole) rather than the stuff you need to learn to manage your life's finances and such.
I... think we had something like that? Overall, in Economics, we studied... um... stuff about monthly rent, I think. But only a bit. We also had lessons about how to write CVs and make impressions during interviews, during 9th Grade... I never paid much attention in that class... actually, I don't think I ever paid attention in any class...
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Re: The vent station
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@Pierre: Are you sure about £48k a year for council tax? They don't even charge a quarter of that here in London!
Re: The vent station
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Yellow Magician wrote:
Just read through the last several pages of this topic. Goddamn, guys. I know this is the Vent Station, but y'all need to take chill pills.
@Pierre: Are you sure about £48k a year for council tax? They don't even charge a quarter of that here in London!
@Pierre: Are you sure about £48k a year for council tax? They don't even charge a quarter of that here in London!
I know man, I thought it was meant to be for minor gripes, not full on counselling here.
Anyways this is the source I pulled Glasgow City Council's price range.
Course I'm hoping I've misheard it but like I said no one has ever explained how this sorta stuff is meant to work for me and the website doesn't do much of a better job.
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Re: The vent station
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I never said this thread was limited to minor problems.
Like I said before I once vented about my father being sexist towards me and my mom backstabbing me.....
Re: The vent station
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I'll always love you, Max.
Re: The vent station
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General Luigi wrote:
Are you all right, Emiko? That seems like quite the reaction to a small mistake.
I'm fine...Well I'm sort of ill right now but that has nothing to do with the way I snapped back.
Re: The vent station
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Emiko Nabile Gale wrote:
Hey Pierre, who died and made you deity of CR?
I never said this thread was limited to minor problems.
Like I said before I once vented about my father being sexist towards me and my mom backstabbing me.....
I never said this thread was limited to minor problems.
Like I said before I once vented about my father being sexist towards me and my mom backstabbing me.....
Just said "I Thought" Emiko not "It is law".
Perhaps I'm mixing it up with the "Grind my gears thread" though I can't remember what happened to that one. I didn't do anything wrong just chill a bit
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Re: The vent station
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Pierre wrote:
Emiko Nabile Gale wrote:
Hey Pierre, who died and made you deity of CR?
I never said this thread was limited to minor problems.
Like I said before I once vented about my father being sexist towards me and my mom backstabbing me.....
I never said this thread was limited to minor problems.
Like I said before I once vented about my father being sexist towards me and my mom backstabbing me.....
Just said "I Thought" Emiko not "It is law".
Perhaps I'm mixing it up with the "Grind my gears thread" though I can't remember what happened to that one. I didn't do anything wrong just chill a bit
Trust me, I'm actually wasn't yelling at you this time. (But then again this is the internet so we never can tell.)
This thread has people venting about stuff that makes you feel upset...The "Grind my gears thread" just struck me as a whole lot of judgements.
Re: The vent station
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dimentiorules wrote:
Shao Mae, which province are you from? I'm from New Brunswick.
I'm from Quebec.
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Re: The vent station
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Pierre wrote:
I know man, I thought it was meant to be for minor gripes, not full on counselling here.
Anyways this is the source I pulled Glasgow City Council's price range.
Course I'm hoping I've misheard it but like I said no one has ever explained how this sorta stuff is meant to work for me and the website doesn't do much of a better job.
Dude, those are the Council Tax Valuation Bands. You pay council tax according to which Band your property belongs to - that band is determined by what the value of the property would be if it were available on the open market on 1 April 1991.
So, if you were in Band D (i.e. your property would be worth £46000 or whatever on April 1 1991), you're gonna have to pay X amount of council tax, but it sure as hell ain't £46k.
The best way to check would be to phone the local council and give them your postcode - or you could use the link provided on that page to find out, maybe.
Re: The vent station
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Emiko Nabile Gale wrote:
Hey Pierre, who died and made you deity of CR?
The funniest thing about this is that Pierre was just responding to Yellow and it was Pierre that got the slap lmao
OMG though Pierre imagine if council tax was £46k! Everyone would be in jail for not paying it. When I lived in a 1 bed flat I was paying about £60 a month but that was with the single persons discount.
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Re: The vent station
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Yellow Magician wrote:
Pierre wrote:
I know man, I thought it was meant to be for minor gripes, not full on counselling here.
Anyways this is the source I pulled Glasgow City Council's price range.
Course I'm hoping I've misheard it but like I said no one has ever explained how this sorta stuff is meant to work for me and the website doesn't do much of a better job.
Dude, those are the Council Tax Valuation Bands. You pay council tax according to which Band your property belongs to - that band is determined by what the value of the property would be if it were available on the open market on 1 April 1991.
So, if you were in Band D (i.e. your property would be worth £46000 or whatever on April 1 1991), you're gonna have to pay X amount of council tax, but it sure as hell ain't £46k.
The best way to check would be to phone the local council and give them your postcode - or you could use the link provided on that page to find out, maybe.
Thank heavens I knew I was misunderstanding something along the way because that was seemingly impossible for even medium range flat. I'll have a deeper look into it, somehow crack this mystery of how much of that needs to be paid in tax.
@ Looby
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Re: The vent station
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Re: The vent station
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Louise wrote:
Spoiler: my vent
Anyone who eats an egg sandwich during a public transportation ride deserves to get motion sickness, and vomit at the exact moment the driver slams on the brakes during an unplanned stop.
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Re: The vent station
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Re: The vent station
Heh heh.
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And it's not like I'm a little kid anymore, either. Yeah, I probably sound immature when I whine that I'm fucking EIGHTEEN, but it's always like this. I barely even do anything at home and they want me to drop classes and stop tutoring a friend because "I'm too busy". How the hell am I busy!? I should be, but they're kind of sort of taking away everything that would have made me busy. Choir? Nah. They made me step down. Orchestra? Nah. They won't let me. Sports? Nah. Every time they're willing to let me, there's some other obligation that I have the foresight to prioritize, and every time I'm free enough to try, they give me some bullshit and tell me no. Job? Oh, come on. The last time I had an interview, they forced me to call it off so I could go with them to look at cars. Even though there was no intention to buy that day. Ever. At all. And for the vast majority of it, I was useless, anyway. And what's even worse? We left the dealership soon enough that I could have still made it to my fucking interview and been half an hour early. With a fake excuse. Yes, my cousin really was sick and dying at the time, but we'd known that for weeks. If they didn't call off my interview, there wouldn't have been an excuse, because I really would have needed to get going by then!
*sighs and takes a deep breath* Ugh. Yeah. Pretty trivial to get so worked up over, really, but I'm the type that doesn't vent much...
So I finally grew a brain and remembered to give myself a signature... Whoopee.
Snackoos IRL. They are delicious and are covered in real chocolate. #so-grateful-I'm-Filipino
Excuse me if I contradict myself. I do that.
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Excuse me if I contradict myself. I do that.
Re: The vent station
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9mayasato9 wrote:
So, my parents tell me off for opening the fucking door. What the fuck do they expect me to do when the doorbell rings!? Honestly! I thought it might have been my mother or my brother who had accidentally locked themselves out of the house (again)! Clearly, it wasn't, but still!
And it's not like I'm a little kid anymore, either. Yeah, I probably sound immature when I whine that I'm fucking EIGHTEEN, but it's always like this. I barely even do anything at home and they want me to drop classes and stop tutoring a friend because "I'm too busy". How the hell am I busy!? I should be, but they're kind of sort of taking away everything that would have made me busy. Choir? Nah. They made me step down. Orchestra? Nah. They won't let me. Sports? Nah. Every time they're willing to let me, there's some other obligation that I have the foresight to prioritize, and every time I'm free enough to try, they give me some bullshit and tell me no. Job? Oh, come on. The last time I had an interview, they forced me to call it off so I could go with them to look at cars. Even though there was no intention to buy that day. Ever. At all. And for the vast majority of it, I was useless, anyway. And what's even worse? We left the dealership soon enough that I could have still made it to my fucking interview and been half an hour early. With a fake excuse. Yes, my cousin really was sick and dying at the time, but we'd known that for weeks. If they didn't call off my interview, there wouldn't have been an excuse, because I really would have needed to get going by then!
*sighs and takes a deep breath* Ugh. Yeah. Pretty trivial to get so worked up over, really, but I'm the type that doesn't vent much...
And it's not like I'm a little kid anymore, either. Yeah, I probably sound immature when I whine that I'm fucking EIGHTEEN, but it's always like this. I barely even do anything at home and they want me to drop classes and stop tutoring a friend because "I'm too busy". How the hell am I busy!? I should be, but they're kind of sort of taking away everything that would have made me busy. Choir? Nah. They made me step down. Orchestra? Nah. They won't let me. Sports? Nah. Every time they're willing to let me, there's some other obligation that I have the foresight to prioritize, and every time I'm free enough to try, they give me some bullshit and tell me no. Job? Oh, come on. The last time I had an interview, they forced me to call it off so I could go with them to look at cars. Even though there was no intention to buy that day. Ever. At all. And for the vast majority of it, I was useless, anyway. And what's even worse? We left the dealership soon enough that I could have still made it to my fucking interview and been half an hour early. With a fake excuse. Yes, my cousin really was sick and dying at the time, but we'd known that for weeks. If they didn't call off my interview, there wouldn't have been an excuse, because I really would have needed to get going by then!
*sighs and takes a deep breath* Ugh. Yeah. Pretty trivial to get so worked up over, really, but I'm the type that doesn't vent much...
Your parents sound horribly manipulative. If you're eighteen, there's no reason they should be forcing you to do anything or stop doing anything, especially when it's something that might be beneficial to you.
Is it that you're still in high school and are still under their roof? Or have you started college?
Either way, you may want to consider putting some distance between you and them. Yeah, I know the world says OMG BUT ITZ UR PARENTZ and that's fine, but at some point either someone needs to cut the cord, or you need to establish some boundaries and be serious about sticking to them. Or, next time you're in a similar situation and you can smell their bullshit from a mile away, consider saying "no" without feeling guilt or any obligation to apologize. Don't let them interfere with something you already have your heart set on.
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Re: The vent station
Heh heh.
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Adrian in black wrote:
Your parents sound horribly manipulative. If you're eighteen, there's no reason they should be forcing you to do anything or stop doing anything, especially when it's something that might be beneficial to you.
Is it that you're still in high school and are still under their roof? Or have you started college?
Either way, you may want to consider putting some distance between you and them. Yeah, I know the world says OMG BUT ITZ UR PARENTZ and that's fine, but at some point either someone needs to cut the cord, or you need to establish some boundaries and be serious about sticking to them. Or, next time you're in a similar situation and you can smell their bullshit from a mile away, consider saying "no" without feeling guilt or any obligation to apologize. Don't let them interfere with something you already have your heart set on.
Is it that you're still in high school and are still under their roof? Or have you started college?
Either way, you may want to consider putting some distance between you and them. Yeah, I know the world says OMG BUT ITZ UR PARENTZ and that's fine, but at some point either someone needs to cut the cord, or you need to establish some boundaries and be serious about sticking to them. Or, next time you're in a similar situation and you can smell their bullshit from a mile away, consider saying "no" without feeling guilt or any obligation to apologize. Don't let them interfere with something you already have your heart set on.
... Well, I have been eighteen for only a month... >///< *overreacted a bit... okay, more than a bit* I'm still under their roof; I'm in community college. Planning to go to school in another state next year, though (I've emailed them and they've already more or less given me the green light, so long as my grades are good). My family's rather strict, unfortunately, so me getting my own boundaries (or even getting a word in...!) won't happen until I've left. Though, should I return after that, I'd be let loose a bit more, if my brother's any indication.
So I finally grew a brain and remembered to give myself a signature... Whoopee.
Snackoos IRL. They are delicious and are covered in real chocolate. #so-grateful-I'm-Filipino
Excuse me if I contradict myself. I do that.
Snackoos IRL. They are delicious and are covered in real chocolate. #so-grateful-I'm-Filipino
Excuse me if I contradict myself. I do that.
Re: The vent station
Zoinks
Gender: Male
Rank: Ace Attorney
Joined: Tue Jun 12, 2007 4:47 pm
Posts: 1914
I'm thinking about how for some reason I agreed to be Vice-President of my University's new anime society. I don't even like anime that much apart from a few shows here and there, and with all due respect the President is someone I really don't want to spend more time around than I have to - slight tinges of both annoyance (whenever he says something stupid) and, admittedly, jealousy (the fact that he gets along with whoever he speaks to despite saying such stupid things and being really self-focused most of the time. Then again, he one-up's a lot of guys in terms of physical appearance, so it can't really be helped).
I'm probably going to back out within the next few days. I'll probably look like a jerk, but I can't follow principles I don't personally agree with, and I don't want to feel constrained by others if I can help it - especially during my final year of University.
On a slightly-related note: I really don't like how many people identify themselves as 'geeks'. Is it right to base your identity based on the types of media you consume? I'm not so sure.
Re: The vent station
Gender: Female
Rank: Ace Attorney
Joined: Wed Aug 08, 2012 2:23 pm
Posts: 9918
As for geeks... call it the new-age prejudice?
If you play Nintendo a lot, you get labelled a Nintendo Fanboy or Geek, if you like Sony you get called a Sony Pony... it's just like being referred to as a Jock, Cheerleader or Nerd. Personally, I think it's rather a compliment to be called a Nerd or Geek, because those words to me always get used on people who are too intelligent for others. So, I'm basically being called intelligent~
C-A
Re: The vent station
Zoinks
Gender: Male
Rank: Ace Attorney
Joined: Tue Jun 12, 2007 4:47 pm
Posts: 1914
I guess labels as a whole are just stupid - and IMO, worse are the people who adjust their personalities to adhere to those labels (yeah, some people do. it's crazy)
Re: The vent station
Ace Sidekick!
Gender: Female
Location: Kurain Village
Rank: Ace Attorney
Joined: Wed Nov 14, 2012 1:00 am
Posts: 2426
Re: The vent station
Gender: Female
Rank: Ace Attorney
Joined: Wed Aug 08, 2012 2:23 pm
Posts: 9918
Emiko Nabile Gale wrote:
The last highschool I've been to...Nerd meant smart-person-whom-I-can-use-to-copy-homework-from or loser.
Isn't it the same?
Like I said, if someone calls me a nerd or geek, I feel like they're saying you-are-too-intelligent-for-me.
Then again, that might be my superiority complex shining through~
Household chores... some I really don't like doing, mostly because you just keep repeating them... like unloading or emptying the dishwasher. I do it, I just don't like doing it at all... then again, it beats washing them by hand. I mean, I do household chores, even if I no longer get any "proper" allowance from it.
C-A
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