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Jokes? https://forums.court-records.net/viewtopic.php?f=18&t=10471 |
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Author: | Southern Corn [ Mon Mar 20, 2017 2:19 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
You were too late so I died oh well RIP in Pepsi me And you got me I'm Penguin Rong Ayup and the guy with Astigmatism was really rod about it. I wanted to put the dunce cap (or should I say dunce cone) on his head. Guy's binary,but needs to be bifocal more than anything |
Author: | DarkAgea [ Mon Mar 20, 2017 4:35 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
Unless you live in an Asian desert, I'm afraid I would have to make an international call to get you an ambulance. I don't think the hospital would like that. I thought you were more like a caterpillar than a penguin. Oh well. Did you enter a competition or something to put the most puns possible in the least number of words? Because I think we have a runner-up here. |
Author: | Southern Corn [ Mon Mar 20, 2017 4:54 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
Yeah I'm in the Sahara that's Asian I think idk I never went to school And how dare you that's a worm as my avatar not a caterpillar. I know the difference because I am very well educated,tyvm Ooooh pun contest let's go boiiiiiii Spoiler: |
Author: | DarkAgea [ Mon Mar 20, 2017 5:43 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
The Sahara is African... And you surely recognise the irony in your statements. *tips Raymond's hat* Almost tempted to ask for a hug, but I will resist the urge. I will resist it. Wow. That was really good. *again tips hat* But now... Spoiler: |
Author: | Southern Corn [ Tue Mar 21, 2017 8:19 am ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
Oh sorry it's European my bad Quote: Surely you recognise the irony in your statement What irony? Quote: But now MY TURN Spoiler: |
Author: | Southern Corn [ Tue Mar 21, 2017 8:19 am ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
Double post |
Author: | DarkAgea [ Tue Mar 21, 2017 10:01 am ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
Quote: What irony? If you don't know, I'm not telling you. Though I'm pretty sure you're just acting. Oh, so we've switched, haven't we? Well, in that case... Spoiler: |
Author: | Southern Corn [ Tue Mar 21, 2017 12:06 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
You think I'm a good actor? Well.. Spoiler: |
Author: | DarkAgea [ Tue Mar 21, 2017 2:23 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
Relying on assistants? How the mighty have fallen... Spoiler: |
Author: | Southern Corn [ Tue Mar 21, 2017 3:26 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
Spoiler: |
Author: | DarkAgea [ Tue Mar 21, 2017 3:57 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
I simply don't need assistants, dear SC. I can fight my own battles without them. Spoiler: |
Author: | DarkAgea [ Tue Mar 21, 2017 4:10 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
If I was wrong, then... Spoiler: |
Author: | Southern Corn [ Tue Mar 21, 2017 4:14 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
Spoiler: Alright,back to the usual jokes. What is the difference of women and men? wo000 Two friends go to see a stand up routine. The first joke by the comedian is the classic 789 joke. Almost everyone laughs but the one of the friends remains stoic. The second one is the classic chicken who crossed the road joke. Once again,everyone laughs but the one friend. The other one thinks that his friend may be hard to impress. In fact,he seems to not even really interested at this point. The third joke is a very offensive Jew joke,and everyone booes the comedian. Suddenly,the one friend bursts into laughter,and everyone looks at him vehemently. "What's so funny about that?!",asks the friend. The other replied,"I got it! Because 789 sounds like seven ate nine! Ahaha!" |
Author: | DarkAgea [ Wed Mar 22, 2017 10:06 am ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
I would have replied yesterday itself, but I went to sleep early. Spoiler: And yup, back to our regularly scheduled joke session... ...with more headlines: City Council runs out of time to discuss shorter meetings Murderer says detective ruined his reputation Starvation can lead to health hazards County to pay $250,000 to advertise lack of funds Cemetery residents making a comeback Woman falls in hospital, told to call ambulance Car thief steals another vehicle to make court date Postman's speed fine got lost... in the post Police Charge One-Armed Man With Unarmed Robbery Police Arrest Naked Man With Concealed Weapon Self-Proclaimed Invisible Man No Show at Court Hearing Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures Miners Refuse to Work After Death Worker Suffers Leg Pain After Crane Drops 800-Pound Ball on His Head Caskets Found as Workers Demolish Mausoleum Hospitals Resort to Hiring Doctors |
Author: | Southern Corn [ Wed Mar 22, 2017 10:40 am ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
That must have been one terrible hospital Spoiler: What did the Jew say to the German at a bar? "Want a drink?" |
Author: | DarkAgea [ Wed Mar 22, 2017 4:31 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
I'm a bit late again... I was busy. Apologies. Spoiler: |
Author: | Southern Corn [ Wed Mar 22, 2017 4:43 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
Spoiler: Found this one in a magazine and it's genius Spoiler: |
Author: | DarkAgea [ Wed Mar 22, 2017 5:38 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
I'm... somewhat early? Let us continue this! Spoiler: The straightforward minds of children are amazing. A good one I found while looking for something: Spoiler: |
Author: | Southern Corn [ Wed Mar 22, 2017 5:58 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
Incredible I'm just going to link to Who's on First. Speaks for itself. Spoiler: |
Author: | DarkAgea [ Fri Mar 24, 2017 1:06 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
I hope you don't think I ran away. It was just a very busy day for me yesterday, and I went half of it without internet (and the other half I was out). But I'm back to wage war! Yeah, I've seen the Who's on First one. Hilarious does not cover it. Spoiler: (I have to admit, this is the first time I'm having a pun contest with anyone - or making so many puns - and I'm enjoying it.) |
Author: | Southern Corn [ Fri Mar 24, 2017 2:23 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
Indeed it is. Spoiler: |
Author: | DarkAgea [ Fri Mar 24, 2017 3:34 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
I'm ready to rock and roll! (... Was that a bit premature?) Spoiler: |
Author: | Southern Corn [ Fri Mar 24, 2017 3:44 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
-5 points for prematurity. Spoiler: |
Author: | DarkAgea [ Fri Mar 24, 2017 4:21 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
You can't minus points for prematurity. We need an actual, neutral judge (or jury) for that. In the words of Kristoph, "Ignoring the fact that he would have to recluse himself due to personal involvement in the case, he's not even fit to judge a chilli cook off!" Spoiler: |
Author: | Southern Corn [ Fri Mar 24, 2017 4:28 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
Spoiler: |
Author: | DarkAgea [ Fri Mar 24, 2017 5:44 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
I'm afraid this contest has electrified all your centres of common sense and coherency. Paging Talia Maurva and team to do something with their magic. If you can't collect your thoughts and speak calmly, Southern Corn, I believe it's clear who has won this contest. Shouting will not help you get across your points more clearly. But regarding your words... Spoiler: |
Author: | Southern Corn [ Fri Mar 24, 2017 6:12 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
Spoiler: |
Author: | DarkAgea [ Sun Mar 26, 2017 4:31 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
I suppose my punctuality is now countered by my lateness. I have no excuse, so apologies. Spoiler: |
Author: | Southern Corn [ Sun Mar 26, 2017 4:49 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
Spoiler: |
Author: | DarkAgea [ Sun Mar 26, 2017 6:17 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
Then I hope nobody minds we're conducting this contest here. Plus, by my calculations, we have eleven (not counting my current one) more posts to go before we overtake this page. Spoiler: BTW, what happened to the other Seniors and Juniors? |
Author: | Southern Corn [ Sun Mar 26, 2017 6:20 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
Spoiler: |
Author: | DarkAgea [ Sun Mar 26, 2017 7:17 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
You don't get them? I think it's time for you to do some brushing up on a very famous franchise... Spoiler: The other seniors and juniors as in, the Second and First Jr., and the First and Second Sr. |
Author: | Southern Corn [ Mon Mar 27, 2017 6:59 am ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
Oh,them? They're dead,duh Spoiler: |
Author: | DarkAgea [ Tue Mar 28, 2017 4:45 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
When and how did they die? Spoiler: |
Author: | Southern Corn [ Tue Mar 28, 2017 5:28 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
When and how did your ancestors die? Same way. I'd be surprised if they were still alive honestly Spoiler: |
Author: | DarkAgea [ Wed Mar 29, 2017 8:10 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
Apologies for the lateness. Again. *sighs* My net loves acting up and shutting down every single time I get to use it. Also, just a warning, I won't be able to post like this by April. But I remember talking to the Second Junior just a few posts ago. And how can Juniors be a Senior's ancestors? Now to the actual stuff: Spoiler: And about your question: is the difference that degrees are hotter than modicums? ... Sorry. |
Author: | Southern Corn [ Thu Mar 30, 2017 5:06 am ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
That was the organisation who got my name wrong. Spoiler: |
Author: | DarkAgea [ Thu Mar 30, 2017 7:56 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
So that organisation decided to engage in the pun contest as well? Spoiler: Good one. |
Author: | Southern Corn [ Fri Mar 31, 2017 7:30 am ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
Dunno their motives Spoiler: |
Author: | DarkAgea [ Sat Apr 01, 2017 12:04 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Jokes? |
I don't know whether I should feel honoured or not. Spoiler: |
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