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Alexander Adams: Lawful Surgeon!Topic%20Title
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Now with Glasses!

Gender: Male

Rank: Desk Jockey

Joined: Thu Oct 11, 2007 4:10 am

Posts: 135

This is a fangame I'm making with AA Online and part one of the first case is on AA Online, however, at the moment, no custom sprites are being used, at least until I get Photoshop (which won't be long, promise.) anyway about this series, this is one of the first trials/series on AA Online to feature a fully working Investigation Scene (you will even be able to examine the courtroom, which is optional, btw.) as you go around finding evidence, breaking witnesses psyche locks (later on, just about everyone has them...) and succeeding in Court.
Currently, only part one of Case 1 is complete, however Part 2 shouldn't take too long to finish then I shall start Case II.
To start Case 1, go here:
If there's any comments/suggestions you'd like for me to include, please say so.
Back, check out LOZ AA.
Re: Alexander Adams: Lawful Surgeon!Topic%20Title
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Gender: Male

Rank: Prosecutor

Joined: Thu Apr 24, 2008 8:24 pm

Posts: 606


You seem eager to introduce the details of the characters, and it seems to take the form of a really rushed conversation. The guy says he's late, and the response is "You're the best doctor here"? That doesn't make much sense to me. Here's my possible revision.
"Hey, better late than never, right? Besides, after that close incident yesterday with the cancer patient, I think I can cut you some slack."

The bit about him being both a doctor and a lawyer was also a little forced. I think maybe you could introduce this fact later, when he's making his acquiantance with the defendant.
"Wait...I thought you were a doctor!"
"Well, that too. Both, actually."
"Huh. Must be a real workload..."

Then, during examination, it said for me to find the needle, so I kept trying to. However, there is very little indicating what can be examined, and in fact I found absolutely nothing of interest other than the medicine on the bed. I just continued...

At first I didn't quite get that Viola was supposed to be a...detective?

Anyone who works at a hospital will normally tell you that rather than not being allowed to administer medication, they're the ones who REGULARLY give medicine. You know, "one pill every two hours" sort of thing. Remember Mimi Miney?

Yeah, I have a feeling I was supposed to have the needle after that so that's when I stopped.
I'm gone for so long, and the colors got all psychedelic! Woohoo!
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