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Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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luck wrote:
If we're going to do that sporking as ourselves thing, I'd like to participate, too.

And a question for Skittle: Are you still doing Athena's punishment?

Me and Skittle are doing a collaboration.
Rocket wrote:
Quick Question: Does anyone know where I can find a DD era Edgeworth smiley? One with the glasses?

The closest to that is Gregory, we usually just use normal Edgeworth's smiley anyway.
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Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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Apologize to the funyarinpa!

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luck wrote:
And a question for Skittle: Are you still doing Athena's punishment?

Yep! Just that collabs take a bit longer.

Rocket wrote:
Quick Question: Does anyone know where I can find a DD era Edgeworth smiley? One with the glasses?


I just looked through the New Smilies thread and I didn't see any. I would make one, but I'm not very good at doing that, haha.

Edit: The first quote did indeed say that Oliver wrote it, so I'm just putting this here so that he doesn't look crazy in the post below.

Last edited by Skittlemask on Mon Oct 26, 2015 12:35 pm, edited 3 times in total.
Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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Skittlemask wrote:
Oliver wrote:
And a question for Skittle: Are you still doing Athena's punishment?

Yep! Just that collabs take a bit longer.

I NEVER ASKED THAT!
I-I think I was possessed!
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Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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WhatTheWhat wrote:
Rubia is part of the management, duh. They don't know that, because she's an undercover boss.

If Airey is Batman, does that make me the Joker?

Skittlemask wrote:
It's nearly unsporkable though. Why? It's like a trilogy, the first part is "Objection!" and has 40 chapters, the second is "The Continuous Objection!" and had 93 chapters, and "One Last Objection!" which has 12 chapters and hasn't been updated since March.

Ah, yeah. I remember skimming the first chapter or so, but it didn't leave a strong impression in mind. I'm of the opinion that no fic is unsporkable, though some certainly would do to have most of it truncated. What it comes down to, then, are the highlights. In fact, if I get back to The Hellspawn, I might just try out a technique I've been planning to utilize.


I see we've rounded a few sporkers who are willing to participate in the live sporking. So, it's me, Airey, Skittle, and luck, yes? I look forward to working with you all. We might be able to squeeze in a fifth member, but it could get a bit crowded and hard to manage if we take more than five.

Now the real question is: what fic should we tackle? Preferably one that is worth at least 4 or 5 Sahwits.
Help! My parents are Phoenix Wright & Miles Edgeworth! Er, I mean they're irresponsible drunks!

Click here for the Gyakuten Saiban vs Ace Attorney Translation Project Blog!
Various official AA stuff translations currently in the works.

Also, click here for the current archive of fanfiction or here for the backup archive. Click here for the blog that updates it.
Includes translations of misc. fan works related or not to AA.
Also, a very popular fanfic ask meme.
Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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Live sporking...?
What did I miss?
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Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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Hmm...

Remember how I mentioned that one fic where Damon Gant molests child!Phoenix? Yeah, I still have it bookmarked... also, it's not actually explicit (IIRC) but it is creepy as all-get-out.
Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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Sounds intriguing. I personally don't have any ideas at the moment (busy finishing up my sporking and all), but if I do come up with something, I'll let you guys know.
Help! My parents are Phoenix Wright & Miles Edgeworth! Er, I mean they're irresponsible drunks!

Click here for the Gyakuten Saiban vs Ace Attorney Translation Project Blog!
Various official AA stuff translations currently in the works.

Also, click here for the current archive of fanfiction or here for the backup archive. Click here for the blog that updates it.
Includes translations of misc. fan works related or not to AA.
Also, a very popular fanfic ask meme.
Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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Rubia, what's this live sporking you mentioned before?
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Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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Thought I'd start off my sporkin' career with this little gem from everybody's favourite website. Found it while derping around on said site, and a quick search says nobody's sporked it, so, Sporking Theatres Inc presents:

Title: How Professor Layton And Damon Gant Are Twins
Rating: :sahwit: This fic, honestly, isn't bad at all. What makes it good for sporking, however, should be evident just by reading the title up there. It's... bizarre. That's all I have to say about it.
Original Fic: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/6605293/1/ ... -Are-Twins

Warning: Implied Spoilers for Professor Layton and the Unwound Future/Azran Legacies. They aren't important to their plots, but beware regardless

Today's Sporkers Are:
Miles Edgeworth!

:edgeworth: ...does this fic have anything to do with me at all?

Damon Gant!
:gant: Oho! Worthy! Swim much these days?

and, as this is a crossover, hailing from the faraway land of London:
Professor Hershel Layton!
:mrhat: A true gentleman never turns down an invitation.

We open up as always in the sporking theatre. Edgeworth is escorting Gant to his seat as the Professor is just arriving.

Layton: It would be no trouble at all, Mr Edgeworth.

Edgeworth: No, it's quite alright, Mr Layton. Convicted criminals such as this man should be left to professionals.

Gant: Oh, Worthy, we're friends aren't we? And friends don't talk that way about each other.

Edgeworth: ....We are not friends, Gant.

Gant: Ah you're no fun. What about you, Hershy? Swim much?

Professor: Swimming? Oh, no. I can't say I'm much of a swimmer. Personally, I prefer solving puzzles.

Gant: Oho, of course! Of course! You always were a smarty, weren't you?

They sit down, with Edgeworth in the middle. The lights dim.

Spoiler:
Edgeworth: Oh? Nothing to say, Management?

Speakers: Welcome to the sporking theatre, Mr Hershel Layton.

Layton: It's a pleasure. Do not worry, I have read and fully understand the rules of this establishment. There will be no trouble at all.

Speakers: Good. Worthy here could learn a thing or two from you.

Edgeworth: ......

Quote:
How Professor Layton and Damon Gant Are Twins


All: ....

Layton: Excuse me? I do not believe I've met this man before.

Gant: Ah, I must agree with Hershy. We never interacted much in our youth, you see.

Edgeworth: It's better not to question it, Mr Layton.

Layton: I see. Well, let's continue on, then.

Quote:
From An Ancient Manuscript Found In France


Gant: Ah, France! We'll all have to go there together some day! Perhaps we can go swimming!

Layton: Ah, that does sound lovely, Mr Gant.

Edgeworth: You will not be going anywhere outside of prison other than here, Gant!

Gant: Ah, you're no fun, Worthy!

Quote:
Being a God is a very desired role, but also a very tricky one. After the death of Hercules, Suez wanted two more sons. The problem was, he wasn't sure who the mother of the children should be. Would they be goddesses or would they be mortal humans?


Layton: Hmm. I don't remember a lot about my mother, and I have always assumed she was "mortal" as you say. However...

Edgeworth: Mr Layton, please, don't consider this... madness as a possibility!

Gant: Ah, come on boys, it has not yet stated that this is our mother in question!

Layton: Ah, but Mr Gant, it is basic logic. By connecting the title of this "fan fiction" as you call it, and the line spoken just now, one can conclude that it is most likely referring to our mother. It's like a puzzle, really.

Gant: Ah, Hershy, why not stop speaking in riddles and relax for once? Sit back and enjoy the show, I say!

Quote:
He knew exactly how he wanted both of the sons and he needed to find a goddess or woman to help make his dream sons a reality. When Hera found out about his plans, she volunteered to help straight away. Suez eventually agreed.


Edgeworth: "Eventually"? Just how willing is this man- ahem, god willing to have sons, again?

Layton: Mr Edgeworth, let's not jump to conclusions. We do not fully understand how deities such as these reproduce, and thus should not question it.

Edgeworth: *Minor Truth bar damage* Nngh.... I suppose you have a point, Mr Layton.

Quote:
"What do you want in your sons?" Hera asked.


Edgeworth: "A good, selfless moral conscience."

Gant: Eh? Did you say something, Worthy?

Quote:
"In the first son," said Suez, "I want him to resemble me. He will adore the glistening oceans. He will have shiny lightning strikes of silver hair and when get on his bad side, serious thunder will emerge from the ground.


Edgeworth: Th- that's surprisingly accurate!

Gant: Waahaahaa! Oh Worthy, it would appear we've found a fan non-fiction at last!

Layton: I'm inclined to agree, Mr Gant.

Edgeworth: (Nnngghh... these two are just perfect together...)

Quote:
He will he cunning and powerful in what he does.


Edgeworth: Well, that part isn't entirely accurate at least.

Gant: Oh, Worthy. I'm hurt.

Layton: Yes, Mr Edgeworth. That was most uncalled for, and not at all what a gentleman would say to one's face.

Edgeworth: I- I apologize!

Quote:
No one will ever hold him down. He will be the God of Law and Swimming. I shall name him Damon Gant."


Gant: It's true! I am a master of swimming! Let's all go swimming tonight, if it's alright with Worthy!

Edgeworth: I-

Layton: Mr Gant, unfortunately you simply must serve your time in prison to atone for your crimes.

Edgeworth: Thank you, Mr Layton.

Quote:
"What about the second son?"


Layton: Ah, I believe this is where I come in, wouldn't you say?

Quote:
"The second son will be a gaming icon," Suez exclaimed with passion. "He is weaker than the first, but stronger.


Layton: I'm afraid you can only choose one in this case, Mr Suez. Choosing both is a contradiction, correct, Mr Edgeworth?

Edgeworth: That is correct, Mr Layton.

Quote:
His intelligence will be undeniable. He will have a heart of gold and a diamond brain.


Layton: Why thank you. However, I am quite sure both my heart and brain are not so supernatural as you claim.

Gant: Aw, Hershy, don't put yourself down like that, I'm sure if you ever have your brain checked the results will be golden!

Edgeworth: (Nnnnghghhh.....!)

Quote:
He will be much more humble. I shall name him Hershel Layton."


Layton: Ha ha. Oh, Mr Suez, you think too highly of me. You remind me of my former apprentice. However, I must point out that my-

Speakers: Apologies, Mr Layton, but we'd like to request that you keep spoilers for Professor Layton and the Unwound Future and Azran Legacies out of our theatre.

Layton: But of course.

Speaker: Thank you for understanding.

Edgeworth: (It can't be... did he make the Management... polite?!)

Quote:
"I shall help you create both," Hera vowed. She grinned as she believed these two would change the world forever.


Gant: Oh yes, indeed we have, haven't we, Hershy? Unlike Worthy here!

Edgeworth: Excuse me, Gant, but I'm sure my desire to find the truth far has changed the world far more than a criminal such as you!

Layton: Unfortunately, Mr Gant, Mr Edgeworth has a point. Furthermore, I am merely an archaeologist and a professor at Gressenheller University. I certainly haven't changed the world by much.

Quote:
Damon and Hershel were born in a cloud where Hera and Suez tried to keep them a secret.


Edgeworth: *Sigh.* It seems the madness has finally begun.

Layton: That does seem rather unusual.

Gant: Oh, stop being so realistic you two, look! We're swimming together!

Layton: ...In a cloud, Mr Gant?

Gant: A raincloud, my boy!

Edgeworth: I don't believe it's said anything about rain, Gant.

Quote:
They failed as Damon was kidnapped by his uncle Hades and he taught him how to use his power to full effect.


Gant: Why, sounds smashing! Summons a lightning bolt

Edgeworth: Aaaack!

Speakers: The Management would like to remind Damon Gant that summoning lightning bolts to electrocute other sporkers is strictly prohibited.

Layton: The gentleman has a point, Mr Gant.

Edgeworth: Th-th-th-thank y-y-y-you M-M-M-M-Managem-m-m-ment....

Quote:
The underworld were impressed by Damon's ability to swim through anything including volcanoes, acid and fire.


Gant: I can do that, can I? I'll have to try it some day...

Edgeworth: Unless you're willing to plead insanity in an appeal trial, you will do no such thing!

Quote:
He passed all the tests Hades gave him without harm. Damon will leave the underworld in 1951 A.D where he will turn back into a fetus and be reborn through Tabitha Gant.


Gant: Ah, he's met my mother, has he? Why on earth did she not tell me? We could have gone-

Edgeworth: -swimming together. Now, to credit the author, that year certainly matches with Gant's age. They certainly did their research.

Layton: I'd expect nothing less from a true lady or gentleman such as the author of this fine piece of literature.

Quote:
Meanwhile his non-identical twin, Hershel Layton will remain as a baby up with the gods until such a time Suez finds his intelligence is needed on Planet Earth. When he comes to earth, all his memories with Zuez will be forgotten and he will have no idea that Damon Gant is his twin from another world.


Layton: Ah, that would explain it.

Gant: But Hershy, why do I not remember you?

Edgeworth: Well, Gant, obviously it's because-

Gant: *gasp!*

Edgeworth: What is it now, Gant?

Gant: I remember now... Hershel was my brother's name!

Layton: Excuse me?

Gant: .......

Quote:
His clever nature, golden heart and diamond brain will be with him for all time.


Layton: Ah, but as I stated earlier, my organs are quite natural.

Gant: And as I stated, dear brother, you should have them checked.

Layton: Ah... 10 PICARATS LOST I suppose you have a point.

Quote:
The twins shall be united once their lives in earth are over. Layton will become the official God of Puzzles while Damon will be the God of Swimming.


Edgeworth: Excuse me! They are together right now!

Gant: Ah... *sweats* well, ah, this can be explained by...

Edgeworth: Taps forehead and grins that either the two of you are dead as we speak...
Camera zoom
Or this really is nothing more than a fan fiction!

Gant: N... N... Mmph... starts clapping at a very fact pace WAHAHAHHAA continues to laugh for over a minute

Edgeworth: ....

Speakers: ....

Layton: ....this reminds me of a puzzle!


The lights turn back on.

Edgeworth: Ah, at last! That took far too long!

Layton: I would beg to differ, Mr Edgeworth. It has only been ten minutes.

Edgeworth: (With you two together it felt like an eternity!)

And so they leave: Gant returns to prison, Edgeworth gets back to work and Professor Layton returns to London after what will likely be his last sporking in this theatre for a long time. Join us next time for another ten minutes of fun and excitement.

And that's my official debut done.
Edited because apparently I remember many things, but not the substance that separates fics from reality as we know and love it: Quotes.
Hexepta: Mayor Attack
A fangame of an unreleased AA-like game, Hexepta: Logic Hack. Follow my fangame to give the official one attention and make it world famous when it's released.


Last edited by ArrowLawn on Mon Oct 26, 2015 2:42 am, edited 2 times in total.
Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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Oliver wrote:
Rubia, what's this live sporking you mentioned before?

Maya suggested that some of the regulars get together and do an out-of-character sporking - y'know, just sporking as ourselves instead of as Ace Attorney characters. We have like... four or five people who agreed to do it, so it's full...?

@ArrowLawn: Ah, Layton as a sporker? Excellent. Nice use of Mr. Hat as his icon...
Also I'm fond of Gant in the sporking theatre, even if I don't use him much (or at all) myself. Great character choices. :yogi:

Oh, it's a good idea to stick your descriptive narration in italic tags. It makes it easier to distinguish from the rest of the sporking.
Also, put the fic in quote tags, please...

One thing I will not is that the Management cut in against spoilers for Azran Legacies, yet
Spoiler:
Layton mentions his biological mother specifically which does, in fact, imply that he was adopted. Which is definitely a spoiler.


Overall, though, an excellent sporking!


Last edited by AireyVerkhovensky on Mon Oct 26, 2015 2:27 am, edited 1 time in total.
Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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I'll read this sporking later, when I finish laughing at that title...
So maybe a couple millennium?

Oh, can I join in on the sporking?
You need some younger representation like me, we can't just have you old farts doing the sporking. :cody-talk:
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Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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Yatta.

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@ArrowLawn: Oh, wow. It's like we're getting new sporkers from out of the blue! Thanks for sharing! I'm a bit busy with mine at the moment, but when I get back here, I'll pay you one of my usual reviews! At first glance, it looks pretty amusing...

@Oliver: Who are you calling old, you brat. We actually have four people confirmed so far (hey, did cutegirlyoungplus say she was going to join in?), though it might get a bit crowded with five. It also will depend on the fic, so if you're joining in, we might need to find one a bit more age-appropriate.
Help! My parents are Phoenix Wright & Miles Edgeworth! Er, I mean they're irresponsible drunks!

Click here for the Gyakuten Saiban vs Ace Attorney Translation Project Blog!
Various official AA stuff translations currently in the works.

Also, click here for the current archive of fanfiction or here for the backup archive. Click here for the blog that updates it.
Includes translations of misc. fan works related or not to AA.
Also, a very popular fanfic ask meme.
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Oh, well nevermind then... :larry:
I...I don't care... :larry:
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Oliver, it's not like we can only do this once.

BTW, where will we put it? Should it go in this thread, even though the original rules prohibit it? (That does also limit what we could spork a bit, ahahaha.) If we put it on someone's personal blog, who will it be?
Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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If we do end up doing it more than once, why don't you make a separate blog for it?
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AireyVerkhovensky wrote:

Also, put the fic in quote tags, please...

Ah, THAT'S what I forgot to add in (Oddly)
Editin' now. :V
Hexepta: Mayor Attack
A fangame of an unreleased AA-like game, Hexepta: Logic Hack. Follow my fangame to give the official one attention and make it world famous when it's released.
Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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Oliver wrote:
If we do end up doing it more than once, why don't you make a separate blog for it?

Because I don't think we'd end up doing it that much... plus what happens if the person/people running the separate blog wander off? I mean, I'm going to be going on an 18-month hiatus in/around June.

Plus we've set a fairly thorough precedent for uploading technically-against-the-rules sporkings to different blogs.
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I suppose we could use either your or my backup blog. I don't post fanfic-related stuff on my main blog.
Help! My parents are Phoenix Wright & Miles Edgeworth! Er, I mean they're irresponsible drunks!

Click here for the Gyakuten Saiban vs Ace Attorney Translation Project Blog!
Various official AA stuff translations currently in the works.

Also, click here for the current archive of fanfiction or here for the backup archive. Click here for the blog that updates it.
Includes translations of misc. fan works related or not to AA.
Also, a very popular fanfic ask meme.
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Either way it's going to end up on my spork directory page. :yogi:
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Rubia Ryu presents… The PW Kink Meme Special III! All aboard the hype train!

Cast: :phoenix: :maya: :edgeworth: :apollo:

Overall rating: :sahwit: :sahwit:
These fics aren’t so “bad” as they are just silly with silly prompts, but the OOCness can be pretty cringy at times. Also, it makes me a little sad on the inside whenever I hear complaints about the localization team. Yes, I realize they aren’t serious… usually.

--------------------------------------------

[There’s a strange scent in the air at the theater tonight… It smells of cleaning fluid.]

Maya: Oh, in that case, I’m totally used to it. Nick pretty much smells like that most of the time.

Phoenix: Nice try, Maya, but that’s left to Apollo these days.

Apollo: (Excuse me, but I do not smell like cleaning fluid.)

Speakers: Ah, I’ve been waiting for too long for this, and I’m sure you all have been too! Welcome back to another round of the Phoenix Wright Kink Meme!

Phoenix: Oh, joy. What am I in for this time…?

Speakers: Unfortunately, Mr. Wright, you will not be the star of this session’s dog pile.

Phoenix: Huh? Really?

Maya: Aw, that’s disappointing. Nick’s always the easiest target.

Edgeworth: Is that so?

Maya: Er… Okay, Mr. Edgeworth, you win hands down in the fic category, but Nick still wins in the sporking category!

Phoenix: Whoo… but at least I’m not the butt of the worst jokes.

Edgeworth: Is that so?

Phoenix: …Yes. That award goes to you.

Edgeworth: Hmph. I may be a favorite to humiliate, but at least I haven’t been stripped stark naked.

Phoenix: Oh, shut it. You were turned into a cat.

Edgeworth: And you received a claw on your face for your troubles.

Phoenix: (It’s not my fault you can’t take a joke…)

Maya: At least he wasn’t a gender-morphed lizard!

Apollo: That’s not how it went, Ms. Fey.

Maya: Hmm… Now that I think about it, all four of us have turned into something else by Discord’s magic, haven’t we?

Phoenix: Um… I stayed human despite everything.

Edgeworth: I believe the proper term in your case is “Neanderthal”.

Phoenix: Sure, eat it up now, Edgeworth… but you’re due for something terrible later.

Edgeworth: As always the case. After all, if you’re not the unlucky sport this time…

Speakers: Actually, it’s not only you, Mr. Edgeworth. The other red one is too.

Apollo: Argh! I knew this was coming.

Maya: I guess it’s a good day to not be wearing red!

Phoenix: But your ribbon is red.

Maya: It’s clearly magenta, Nick.

Phoenix: Magenta is a shade of red, Maya.

Maya: Oh, look who’s generalizing now! Then you don’t get to complain when I call A-frames “ladders”.

Phoenix: Stepladders are stepladders, no matter how you put it! Don’t change the subject!

Speakers: Ahem, speaking of subjects, I think we have a special to run, peoples.

[And, zap, in they go and out the lights go.]

Spoiler:
Maya: I still say it’s magenta.

Phoenix: Yeah, yeah… and my tie’s scarlet.

Edgeworth: Please, can we move on from the color wars? Thanks.

Prompt:
Quote:
"Mr. Wright, how many friends of yours are prisoners on death row? Seriously this is the third person we've visited this week."

Maya: Oh, cool! We’re even getting the prompt with the fic!

Phoenix: “Cool” is not the word I’d go for, but at least it’s different…

Apollo: Is that supposed to be me saying that line? And why are we visiting people in prison in the span of a week?

Maya: Maybe ’cause you guys have nothing better to do?

Edgeworth: If that was the case, it’s curious why they don’t do it more often.

Phoenix: Looking for work is not that simple and you know it.

Fic:
Quote:
Stick to the Balls

Guys: …

Maya: It’s a lot less disturbing if you picture baseball.

Phoenix: Thanks, Maya, but I don’t think it’s going to keep working later…

Apollo: Actually, I think it feels even worse if I do picture baseball…

Phoenix: Oof.

Edgeworth: *facepalm* Did you have to bring that up, Justice?

Apollo: Sorry, but it’s the first thing I thought of.

Maya: What’s wrong with you guys? All I think of is a bat striking a ball and… oh.

Quote:
"Mr. Wright, how many friends of yours are prisoners on death row? Seriously this is the third person we've visited this week."

Apollo: Huh? Oh, it’s just copied from the prompt.

Maya: Makes me wonder just how often this happens…

Speakers: A lot, but not too commonly.

Phoenix: Should we count that as a sin, Edgeworth?

Edgeworth: It’s just a restatement with further context, but… after that title, I think we should.

Speakers: Wait, we have a sin counter? Oh, yeah, we do! *click*

All: Seriously!?

Quote:
They were in the office bathroom. Apollo was brushing the toilet while Phoenix stood over him, looking on, ensuring that he did not miss a spot, when the younger man suddenly turned toward him.

Apollo: Okay, I know Mr. Wright is pretty picky about that stuff, but I don’t need to be supervised with toilet cleaning duty!

Phoenix: I always just check his results later, and if it’s clean enough, I let him go.

Maya: But what happens when it isn’t?

Phoenix: Then I tell him to get to it.

Maya: But what if he has a case just then?

Phoenix: Then I take the case and leave him to the toilet.

Apollo: What!? Oh, come on!

Phoenix: Agency policy, Apollo.

Quote:
"They're not all on death row, Apollo," Phoenix sighed. "Just Kristoph."

"Well, alright, Mr. Wright," Apollo said, sighing, continuing to scrape away at a particularly sticky stain.

Maya: Ew, what happened to the toilet?

Phoenix: Now that’s shameful. I would never let the seat get that dirty. Maybe it was a good idea to supervise him, after all…

Apollo: For your information, Mr. Wright, I wouldn’t let the seat get that dirty either.

Phoenix: Are you suggesting that Athena or Trucy would?

Apollo: No… in fact, that toilet’s about the shiniest thing in the office.

Phoenix: …… Just for that comment, Apollo, you’re getting toilet duty again.

Apollo: What!? What did I do!?

Edgeworth: Justice, take it from me when I say, “Never insult the state of your superior’s badge.”

Apollo: …I never meant it like that.

Phoenix: Then, I suggest you take better care with what you say in the future.

Apollo: *sigh* Yes, sir…

Quote:
"So, we met that one insane old guy who started crying when you told him my name, after which he started screaming 'Polly! Polly!' and was a total weirdo-"

"That was Yanni, Apollo."

Maya: Wow, Nick! I didn’t know you’d introduce Apollo as “Polly”!

Phoenix: I don’t.

Apollo: Because it’s insulting.

Phoenix: (Though that’s not my exact reason…) And when was I ever friends with Yanni Yogi? Sure, I felt bad for him, but we weren’t close at all.

Maya: Well, we did pretend to be his kids for a moment.

Phoenix: Yeah, and things got uncomfortable fast.

Apollo: …Do I want to know what happened?

Phoenix: Probably not.

Quote:
"And what did he do again?" Apollo sighed, wiping his brow with his clean hand.

Phoenix brushed his face, trying to summarize the convoluted events into an inoffensive sentence. "He killed a man who indirectly drove his wife into suicide." He suddenly paused, deciding that what he said was overly simplified and made Yanni's actions seem unjustifiable, but could not revise his sentence before Apollo started to speak.

Maya: Classic Nick, talking before he thinks.

Phoenix: Well, Maya, how would you put it in one sentence?

Maya: He killed a man in revenge, but turned out to be a puppet for an evil mastermind who started the mess that drove his girlfriend to suicide.

Apollo: …Ouch.

Maya: And that’s how you do it, Nick.

Phoenix: Hm, fair enough.

Quote:
"Right," Apollo shook his head. "Then there was that one quadriplegic who had all these birds flying around his head, and started crying when you mentioned that circus performer-"

"That was Acro. He's a good guy, Apollo."

"He's a murderer."

Maya: Aw, have a heart, Apollo!

Apollo: I think I’d be more concerned that he has birds flying around his head…

Phoenix: They’re his friends, you know.

Apollo: Yeah, but…

Edgeworth: Inmates are allowed to have animal companions as per a therapy program.

Apollo: …Okay, then. So what did he do?

Quote:
"Look," Phoenix nearly yelled, and then sighed. "He tried to kill a girl who indirectly caused his brother to be paralyzed by a tiger, but ended up killing her father instead."

"I have no idea what you just fucking said. But yeah. Proves my point," he smirked, returning to the task at hand.

Phoenix: Actually, it was a lion.

Apollo: Either way, that sounds like a terrible tragedy and I would not be so insensitive or foul-mouthed. End of story.

Maya: Well, Ficpollo seems to be too absorbed in his work anyway, so maybe he’s not bothering to check what’s coming out of his mouth.

Phoenix: Sounds like someone needs a little mouth soap. *smirk*

Apollo: …Mr. Wright, I really hope you’re not being literal about it.

Quote:
Phoenix gritted his teeth, sighing. "Not all murderers are bad people, Apollo. It's the first thing you have to understand if you're going to be a good defense attorney-"

Apollo interrupted him. "Says the guy who lost his badge for allegedly forging evidence, and then forged evidence seven years later to put the forger in jail."

Phoenix: …

Maya: Ouch. Low blow.

Apollo: Just for the record, Mr. Wright, I understand why you made me present that forged letter…

Phoenix: Technically, it was just a reproduction of what I had discovered. After all, I couldn’t have made it if it didn’t exist.

Apollo: Yeah, I know. It was important to show it and all… but it was still a forgery.

Phoenix: …Now you’re starting to sound like the kid in the movie.

Apollo: Please don’t put me on his level. I’m being completely level with you right now.

Phoenix: You don’t say? I’m not fond of pushing around my authority, but if it comes to it…

Apollo: N-no, no! You’re perfectly fine doing what you do, sir! Heheh… *gulp*

Quote:
Phoenix had half a mind to punch the little shitface. But he turned to look out the door to ensure that no one had heard that.

Apollo: I’m pretty sure everyone already heard about it anyway. The trial was a big deal.

Maya: It sure scared me when I first did. I couldn’t believe Nick would forge evidence…

Phoenix: Except I didn’t?

Maya: Oh, I don’t mean that. I mean just now when you and Apollo mentioned that you presented a forgery in court and got away with it. Second time too.

Apollo: Second time!?

Phoenix: No, no, it was the first! What are you saying, Maya?

Maya: Remember when you tried to bluff with a bottle that didn’t have the poison to trick The Tiger?

Phoenix: That wasn’t a forgery. I was just bluffing…

Apollo: …I see you had a bit of shady history even before the whole forgery scandal.

Phoenix: But it really was just an honest-to-goodness bluff!

Edgeworth: Of course it was, Wright. Every one of your bluffs are “honest to goodness”.

Phoenix: …I can feel the bite from that sarcasm, Edgeworth.

Edgeworth: Heh.

Quote:
"And there was that gray-haired dude we just saw with the large head of white hair, that huge-ass red visor, drinking that large cup of coffee, and he started crying blood and, like, having a period when you mentioned Maya and Pearl-"

Maya: Oh, come on! Godot is awesome! Kinda weird with his coffee metaphors and parables, but still awesome!

Apollo: I’ve only met him a couple times before in here, but he seems like the last guy who’d burst into tears.

Maya: It’s like he always says, “A lawyer only cries when it’s all over.”

Apollo: … (Maybe I shouldn’t bring up that moment with Trucy and Mr. Hat…)

Quote:
"That was Godot," Phoenix enunciated, ready to give Apollo his own fucking period now. "He killed a woman who indirectly was the girl who poisoned him over fourteen years ago-"

"What is it with all this fucking complicated indirect shit?" Apollo yelled, throwing the brush across the room. "It's like... it's like the only redeeming quality a male character needs is staging a complicated murder, and being a total goddamn pussy about it later!"

All: …

Phoenix: For shame, Apollo. Never throw the toilet brush across the room.

Apollo: I would never, Mr. Wright. And that’s definitely not sidestepping the obvious problem…

Phoenix: What problem? Murders are supposed to be indirect.

Edgeworth: No, they aren’t. Unfortunately, current trends do tell otherwise…

Phoenix: It’s like they’re all trying for something new every time.

Edgeworth: So that we have a fresh challenge on the job? Please, Wright.

Phoenix: You have to admit it’s a good point.

Edgeworth: I admit nothing.

Apollo: Hello? How about the bit where fic-me mentions “the only redeeming quality”?

Phoenix: Now, now. Don’t pay any attention to the worst sins. That’s just feeding the troll-fic.

Speakers: What? But it’s your duty as sporkers to…

Edgeworth: We still reserve the right to spork what we wish, so be quiet.

Speakers: …*sigh*

Quote:
"Shut up, Apollo-"

"Remember when I was a rookie attorney? Everybody loved me because I'd stuttered all the fucking time. Now I'm a fucking badass, and all the fangirls are probably bleeding in their fucking panties because I'm not cute or kind or someone a fucking WOMAN can relate to!"

Maya: Ew, tmi!

Edgeworth: If this attitude keeps up, blood might just be shed.

Phoenix: And it’s not looking likely that he’d be ready to be… red-deemed.

All: …

Edgeworth: I was so aggravated by that pun that I’m actually going to speak for Justice: “Shut up, Wright.”

Phoenix: *grin* Er… score?

Quote:
"Apollo, you are treading thin ice-"

"Even look at your fucking games! That von Karma guy, that Gant guy, and that Engarde guy... they were so fucking sweet! And your games just demonized them! Like, they had so much cock! And they shamelessly killed shit cause they were badasses-"

Maya: Wow, he got so mad he even broke the fourth wall. Do we count that as a sin?

Speakers: I only count those sins when you guys do it.

Phoenix: Speaking of that sin count, how many are we up to?

Speakers: One.

All: ONE!?

Edgeworth: What is wrong with you!? Do you not see anything sinful since we first started counting!?

Speakers: I just said so. I only count them when you guys do!

All: …

Maya: Now what are we supposed to use to keep track!?

Apollo: It’s no surprise, but the Management is completely useless.

Edgeworth: And they always find a way to be even less competent.

Phoenix: Worst of all, they do it on purpose and it’s not even funny.

Speakers: Everyone, need I remind you that the Management is not the center of this sporking?

All: You asked for it!

Quote:
"Apollo, you're one step away-"

"And Kristoph! Man, was he the fucking greatest guy ever! He wasn't a total girl like the rest of those menstruating jackasses-"

Apollo: OBJECTION! Of all the people you could have chosen to get any respect, author… you went with him!?

Phoenix: …I have to wonder if the author really meant that, though. These kinds of fics are often written to draw controversy.

Apollo: I know I might be taking the bait here, but it’s just in terrible taste! I mean, yeah, I respected Mr. Gavin for what he taught me, but aside from that, we were never close. And it still annoys me that he basically took me in because he was so paranoid about everyone even remotely related to the forgery scandal…

Phoenix: Yeah, that’s Kristoph for you… but it was still because of him that I chose to hire you, you know.

Apollo: Even though you said you weren’t all that impressed by how I did?

Phoenix: Truth be told, I didn’t expect that much from you in the first place.

Apollo: …

Phoenix: But rest assured, you’ve definitely improved and I’m glad to have you aboard.

Apollo: Oh, uh, thanks…

Phoenix: *grin* After all, who else is best for toilet duty?

Apollo: *grumble* (Aaand, you just ruined it, Mr. Wright.)

Maya: Aww, now that’s a touching end to round that discussion!

Edgeworth: (Justice was right… he was taking the bait, but probably didn’t realize which bait he took.)

Quote:
Suddenly, a golden flash of light appeared. Apollo and Phoenix gasped, seeing black tied executives emerge from it, all cramming themselves against the walls of the small bathroom. They all seemed stuffy and arrogant, but intelligent, and somehow... really, really inappropriate.

All: What.

Phoenix: Suddenly, it’s gotten a lot more uncomfortable, and I don’t mean how cramped it looks.

Edgeworth: Management, surely you aren’t going to punish us for fourth-wall violations if the fic has come to this, yes?

Speakers: Weeell… okay. But it’s only going to be a temporary ban until they leave.

Maya: Whoo! I’ve been waiting to say this, but I can’t wait for Jump Festa this year!

Apollo: Aren’t we all? I’m wondering what the localization team will come up for the English title, though, since “Dual Destinies” is already taken…

Speakers: …Aren’t you two just a bit pushing bounds?

Maya: You said the ban was lifted.

Speakers: Yeah, yeah. Don’t forget I’m watching the clock.

Quote:
One of them picked up the brush Apollo had thrown and started combing his receding hairline with it, small shitstains appearing across his smooth head. Another executive, deciding that he had to poop really badly, sat on the half-cleaned, improperly bleached toilet and took a dump.

Phoenix: …What an affront to everything clean and decent.

Maya: Funny hearing that from you and your messy room.

Phoenix: It may be messy, but I’m at least very conscious about cleanliness!

Maya: And lining your pockets, I suppose.

Phoenix: …That’s just superstition anyway and is beside the point.

Maya: Ah, you’re only saying that now because your toilet hasn’t attracted many customers.

Phoenix: Regardless, it’s important to keep the bathroom clean in case anyone does come…

Quote:
The last of the executives emerged from the portal: a small, balding Japanese man. He walked over to the younger attorney, smiled, and punched him in the face, a golden ray of light emerging from the contact point.

Apollo: That isn’t who I think it is, is it?

Phoenix: If it’s not him, then I don’t know who he’d be.

Edgeworth: If you two are referring to Mr. Takumi, I think you’d be a bit off.

Maya: Yeah, the Mr. Takumi we know isn’t balding.

Apollo: Nor does he punch people in the face with a glowing fist.

Maya: Glowing? Are you sure the author meant that, or shooting beams?

Apollo: Does it matter?

Quote:
"Ahhhh!" Apollo screamed. "What the f-" Suddenly, he became calm and tranquilized, and no longer furrowed his brow angrily or spat out explicit words.

Maya: Hooray! Our mouth soap man has arrived!

All else: …

Phoenix: Really, Maya?

Maya: What? Everyone has to calm down and smile whenever Mr. Takumi’s around!

Phoenix: That’s not what you said earlier…

Maya: You know what I meant.

Quote:
"Wh-who are you?" stammered Phoenix, quietly, unable to comprehend this man's absolutely dignified, godlike power.

The man gave a peaceful, serene smile. "I am Shu Takumi," he said. "I am your creator."

"L-like... the god of law? You're the GOD OF LAW?!" gasped Phoenix.

Phoenix: …I liked fic-me better when he was more reasonable.

Edgeworth: I suppose this suggests that everyone who stands before Mr. Takumi is reduced to a miserable pile of stupidity?

Apollo: Apparently. Even angry fic-me drew a complete blank.

Maya: But at least that was an improvement.

Quote:
"No, idiot. You're a video game character. Not a real lawyer. Remember?"

"O-oh, yeah," he said, suddenly remembering that Apollo had broke the fourth wall just a moment ago.

Phoenix: Even if I am just a video game character, that doesn’t null the fact that I am still a lawyer, and a better one than most in real life.

Edgeworth: If anyone had the same amount of plot devices circling around them, they too would be legendary.

Phoenix: Don’t be like that, Edgeworth. You got your own games too.

Edgeworth: Unlike you, I already made a name for myself long before then.

Phoenix: Yeah… as the “Demon Prosecutor”.

Edgeworth: Moral dilemmas aside, it still sounds better than “Legendary Bluffer”.

Phoenix: I happen to like that name, thanks.

Quote:
He now stared at Apollo, who gazed at him with fear and incomprehension. "Wh-what did you do to me?"

Shu Takumi shook his head. "These men right here, these... buffoons," he coughed out, pointing to the black-suited guys, two of whom were fellatiating the plunger, three of whom were participating in a disco party under the cold shower while still wearing their suits, "this is the localization team."

Phoenix: Okay, I take back what I said earlier. THIS is the real affront to everything decent.

Maya: Well, I don’t see what’s wrong with three guys partying under a cold shower.

Phoenix: …Even if spirit mediums do train regularly under freezing waterfalls, I’ve never heard of any “partying” under a shower.

Maya: Well, I’d hope you wouldn’t! A woman alone in the bath deserves her privacy, you perv!

Phoenix: Hey, I didn’t mean it like that!

Edgeworth: …Not to be “that guy”, but “fellatio” cannot be used as a verb.

Apollo: I’m surprised you could say that without your voice cracking.

Edgeworth: *shrug* It’s just a word.

Quote:
"...And?"

"They fu- er, messed up your translation," he sighed. "They promoted a grossly misogynistic, perverted dialogue that broke the fourth wall, made you say bad words, allowed you to deviate terribly from canon, and made Phoenix want to punch a little shitface."

"Uhhhhhh... no I wasn't," Phoenix said, who still wanted to punch that little shitfaced attorney.

Phoenix: I’m pretty sure that’s just your work, author. (And neither of us would punch anyone.)

Apollo: And of course they’d make Mr. Takumi just as foul-mouthed as the people he’d be criticizing.

Maya: And Mr. Takumi would never complain about breaking the fourth wall. He does it all the time!

Phoenix: With you, at least. Most of his characters still respect the wall.

Maya: Imaginary walls are made to be broken, you know.

Phoenix: …Well, as we all say, “you break it, you fix it”.

Maya: What? I thought it was “you break it, you own it”!

Phoenix: That’s only in shops.

Quote:
"I know all," said Shu Takumi, filling his eyes with a god-like, magical aura. "Now, I will snap my fingers to liquidate this shitty - er, crappy localization team."

He snapped his fingers, and suddenly the localization team became liquidated. None of them remained in the room; Apollo and Phoenix had little idea that they had disappeared to a horrible, terrible, no-good, very bad place: The Unemployment Line.

Edgeworth: Surely, author, you know that’s not how international department negotiations work. Shu Takumi is not in charge of anything that happens during the localization process.

Apollo: I’m still disturbed that’s how he liquidates them, rather than the obvious route that would spare the people running the “unemployment line”.

Maya: Is it me, or is that bit about the “horrible, terrible, no-good, very bad” thing a reference to a classic children’s story?

Phoenix: Sounds like it. It makes sense, considering the general age group of writers of these kinds of fics.

Maya: Ouch… aren’t most fanfic writers young adults already?

Edgeworth: Age means nothing if immaturity is constant.

Maya: Dang, Mr. Edgeworth, that’s deep…

Quote:
"That's all of them," Shu Takumi triumphantly quipped. He suddenly saw a piece of poop hanging in the air, in the toilet bowl; the fecal matter had not properly exited from the pooping executive's orifices. "Goddamn," he said, "the fecal matter has not properly exited from the pooping executive's orifices. Time to liquidate the game programmers."

Apollo: Wait, it was the programmers’ fault!?

Phoenix: Surely, a technical problem like that isn’t exclusive to the localization team.

Edgeworth: Are you referring to the cleanup of the “junk data” or the junk text within this paragraph?

Phoenix: Both.

Maya: Well, then maybe he ought to start liquidating the author?

Apollo: If only it were that easy…

Quote:
He turned to leave the room, before suddenly stopping. "Oh, that's right," he said, "I have to wipe your memories." He prepared to snap his fingers, before Apollo interjected.

"HOLD IT!" he screamed, while Shu Takumi became more angry, almost becoming a Super Saiyan, like Kristoph. "Sorry," he squealed.

"SAY WHAT YOU WILL OR YOU WILL BE LIQUIDATED TOO!"

All: …

Maya: Now he’s starting to scare me, Nick.

Phoenix: (Yeah, the image of Shu Takumi screaming like Kristoph is pretty terrifying in its own right…)

Apollo: I… I’m not sure what he means by it.

Edgeworth: I find it clear enough. He’s suggesting that we should say what we mean to say - that is, stay in character – and we won’t be “liquidated” like the rest of the failures.

Maya: Oh, in that case, there’s nothing to fear, right?

Phoenix: Not exactly…

Quote:
Wait, if he says what he will anyways say, Phoenix reasoned in his head, wouldn't that mean that he can't be liquidated no matter what? Suddenly, he stops thinking; now that the localization team is completely gone, he cannot form an independent thought of his own, for he is just a hollow video game character.

Phoenix: OBJECTION!

All else: …

Edgeworth: Not going to add anything to that objection, Wright?

Phoenix: I think it explains itself pretty well, but if you insist… Hey, author, who are you to call me “hollow” after that joke with Kristoph Gavin?

Maya: Oooh! Burn!

Apollo: Heh. That actually felt pretty refreshing, Mr. Wright. Nice one.

Phoenix: What? You think I’d leave you hanging with that toilet duty gag all the time? Come on.

Quote:
"Well..." Apollo said, "You're Japanese, right? Well, how are you speaking English?"

Shu Takumi smiled at him, as though he were just a petty little mortal. "I localized my own fucking speech, bitch. Dare you question my ways?"

Phoenix: If anything, it sounds like he used the localization team’s efforts anyway, even though they’ve all been fired.

Edgeworth: He wouldn’t be able to find another right at that instant.

Maya: But he’s supposed to be the “Creator”, right? He can just create his own localization team with a snap of his fingers!

Phoenix: Well, if he decided to use that kind of language anyway, I don’t see the point of liquating the team earlier.

Apollo: I think the author was going for something there, but decided the whole fic was crud and settled with that as its theme.

Edgeworth: Succinctly put, Justice. I couldn’t agree more.

Quote:
For once, Apollo didn't have a proper response to that. Perhaps it was because he now stopped thinking, unable to form a thought of his own, now that the god no longer wrote his lines for him.

Apollo: Haha, yeah, right. Enough with the religious jokes. It was already bad enough with all the disgusting toilet humor.

Maya: In the fic or in our group?

Phoenix: …

Maya: Sorry, Nick, but someone had to say it.

Phoenix: Just you wait, Maya…

Quote:
Shu Takumi snapped his fingers and left in the same flash of golden light in which he had emerged. Apollo was back cleaning the toilet, trying desperately to brush away the giant piece of poop that hung in midair. Phoenix was inspecting his work.

Maya: And what goes around comes around.

Apollo: Like I said, the fic’s entire theme is around how terrible it is.

Phoenix: *sigh* And to think we started off this sporking with a joke about cleaning it up.

Edgeworth: Poetic, in a sense… Circular, in another.

Speakers: Heh heh… you guys are acting like the sporking’s coming to an end.

Apollo: But this fic is ending soon, right?

Speakers: This fic… yes, I suppose.

Quote:
"Mr. Wright," Apollo asked, "how many friends of yours are prisoners on death row? Seriously this is the third person we've visited this week."

All: …

Maya: You know, I think we ought to sin this thing so much more just for seeing the same line over and over again, even though it was used properly.

Edgeworth: And every time, it was missing that necessary comma after “seriously”.

Speakers: Geez, FINALLY! I was wondering when someone would bring it up.

Edgeworth: Well, aren’t you a satisfied pooch?

Speakers: …Now that just sounds creepy coming from you.

Quote:
"Er, well..."

Suddenly, Apollo stood up and punched Phoenix in the face.

"Gahhhhh!" screamed Phoenix. "What was that for!"

"That was canon," sighed Apollo, before returning to his work, saddened that he was unable to go on his misogynistic tirade any more.

Apollo: It was canon, but it also made sense in its original context.

Phoenix: How typical… after all that shouting and arguing, I’m still the one that gets hit in the face at the end.

Maya: And Pearly isn’t even here! How lucky of you, Nick!

Phoenix: …There wasn’t even anything related to romance here. Why would Pearls try to slap me?

Maya: Well, someone’s gotta do it somehow. It’s basically tradition.

Speakers: Ooh! I volunteer to shock him at the end of this sporking!

Phoenix: What!? I’m not even the subject of today’s dog pile!

Edgeworth: You usually aren’t, Wright. You’re just a magnet for trouble.

Phoenix: *sigh*…


Speakers: Don’t go away, folks! We’ll be right back after a short commercial break!

[We have commericals now, sir?]

Speakers: For obvious reasons, we won’t be showing any here… In fact, let’s just cut to the next fic.

[Will do, sir.]

Phoenix: (Did you guys really have nothing prepared for this intermission…?)

Spoiler:
Prompt:
Quote:
Game over.

Speakers: Good thing this next fic is a short one.

Edgeworth: “Good thing”? What’s going on with you now?

Speakers: It means the 4th wall will be back up after this concludes! My hands are getting trigger-happy…

Maya: Don’t you mean “paws”?

Speakers: I know what I said, dang it.

Fic:
Quote:
Brooklyn Rage!

Apollo: Oh, no. More pointless shouting and swearing.

Speakers: And it’s all from you, Apollo Justice.

Apollo: I thought so… you said it was short, right?

Quote:
Apollo Justice looked stunned.

"Game over?"

"Ja, Herr Forehead. My older brother just confessed to killing Drew Misham. The game is over."

Apollo: Oh, hey. It’s from that trial.

Maya: The one where Nick used you to pull off a bluff, but failed?

Phoenix: Maya, stop that. You’re just confusing everyone even more.

Maya: Step your game up, Nick! You haven’t taken me down even once!

Phoenix: (It’s only because the opportunity hasn’t arrived yet…)

Quote:
"This is bullshit! The game can't be over! I didn't even do anything, I just watched you talk about the Jurist System! This is a game, the player's supposed to have some fucking input on the final boss!"

Apollo: Oh, here we go…

Quote:
Kristoph, having regained his composure, pushed his glasses further up the bridge of his nose, "But, Mr. Justice, the player did have some input on the final boss."

"Like hell I did! I presented the yellow letter and that was thrown out, and then I read, like, twenty minutes of text!"

Apollo: To be fair, if that remaining segment took you twenty minutes, I recommend the player should take a break. Their eyes are probably sore by this point.

Maya: So, was it because of the letter that was thrown out that forced the player to take twenty minutes?

Phoenix: Heh. (Now it’s my turn…)

Maya: What?

Phoenix: Don’t take this the wrong way, Maya, but I’ve had those moments after reading some of yours.

Maya: … :sad-maya:

Phoenix: Uh?

Apollo: Mr. Wright…

Edgeworth: Now look what you’ve done, Wright. Was revenge truly that important?

Phoenix: W-wait, wait… Maya, I’m sorry. Please don’t cry.

Maya: It’s okay, Nick… *smirk* After all, you’re getting old. You might need some extra eye rest!

Phoenix: …Okay, fine. I’ll take that. (You little…)

Quote:
Kristoph insisted, "But the player did have some input. A jurist chose whether the defendant was guilty or not guilty."

"Man, you know what?" asked Apollo, "That's probably the only thing even more lame than if the game just won itself without any player input. Who the fuck was this jurist asshole anyways?"

A glint of light reflected off Kristoph's lenses as he smirked cruelly, "I believe it was... your mother."

"Real fucking mature, Kristoph."

Apollo: …Seriously? We’re ending it on that?

Maya: But what if it was?

Apollo: That can’t be right. I haven’t seen my mom in ages. I don’t even remember how she looks like…

Maya: Aw, kinda reminds me of me and my mom… and after finally meeting her again, she ended up getting killed.

Apollo: Oh, wow… yeah, I feel you. It was like that for me and Clay. (I hope nothing like that comes up again…)

Phoenix: …

Edgeworth: …Don’t you owe them an explanation some time?

Phoenix: In due time, Edgeworth.


Speakers: Don’t go away, folks! We’ll be right back after a short commercial break!

Phoenix: Just for that, I’m adding another sin on your part, Management.

Speakers: Excuse me?

Phoenix: If you don’t have anything to add to the intermissions, then don’t! Now hit that counter.

Speakers: Bah. I don’t take orders from anyone! Who do you think you are!?

Edgeworth: The Chief Prosecutor who has ties with several politicians that could always cancel your public broadcast.

Phoenix: What, seriously?

Edgeworth: We may not be able to touch the Management themselves, but it’s not the same for the broadcast.

Speakers: …*click*

Phoenix: And plenty more from the last two fics.

Maya: And the fics to come!

Speakers: *click, click, click, click…*

Spoiler:
Prompt: \
Quote:
Ace Attorney casts from America meets Gyakuten Saiban casts from Japan in Japanifornia. Phoenix Wright meets Ryuichi Naruhodo. Maya vs Mayoi in debate burger vs ramen. No sex please.

Phoenix: Um… well, this is new.

Maya: *gasp* That means it’s my turn, right? I get to play translator again!

Speakers: Bah, I can always play translator! That’s not why I brought you here!

Edgeworth: Don’t you have a counter to get to?

Speakers: *click, click, click, click…*

Apollo: …Man, the kink meme is one scary place if a prompt has to include “no sex” to make sure.

Maya: Well, why else is it called the “kink meme”?

Fic:
Quote:
異議あり!

Maya: It says “Objection!”

Phoenix: I might not know much Japanese, but even I could tell what that says.

Apollo: I hope we aren’t really going to need a translator, though. The prompt was innocent enough.

Edgeworth: An innocent prompt is just as easily corrupted with a corrupt fic.

Maya: そうですね。御剣さんの一言はずいぶん相応しいよね!

Phoenix: Hey, Maya! Who’s going to translate your lines if you keep doing that?

Edgeworth: All she said was she agreed with me.

Phoenix: …Thanks.

Quote:
They stared each other down, fingers outstretched, and couldn't help but wonder how they got to this point.

Phoenix: …Yep, now this is getting a bit awkward.

Maya: It’s as if destiny called you two together to point at each other like a match made in heaven…

Phoenix: …If you’re implying some sort of shipping here, Maya, don’t you dare keep going.

Maya: But it’s not really “gay” if it’s with yourself!

Phoenix: That is not the problem…

Quote:
It had been a rather normal day in California, all things considered. Phoenix and Maya were returning to the Wright and Co. offices, when they saw that something had been painted in the window. Thanks to Maya's understanding of Japanese (for ceremonial purposes, as the Fey tradition stemmed from Japan), they were able to discover that the place had been renamed the "Naruhodo Law Offices of Truth and Beauty".

Edgeworth: *smirk*

Phoenix: Now alter-fic-me is painting graffiti on my window.

Maya: It looks nice, though.

Phoenix: He even took the spot where my name was and added “Truth and Beauty” to it!

Maya: Well, I have no idea where that came from, since it’s not how it was in the Japanese versions.

Speakers: Tsk, tsk. The 4th wall rule is up again, you know. Just for that, I’m taking off one sin from the count!

Phoenix: …That’s not going to help you much. Keep going.

Speakers: *click, click, click, click…*

Quote:
It had a nice ring to it.

Phoenix: It does NOT. And I don’t like the implications it gives about alter-fic-me.

Maya: Wow, you care that much about him, Nick?

Phoenix: …It’s not like that. I just care about alter-me’s image.

Apollo: (Maybe Ms. Fey was onto something earlier…)

Quote:
Inside, the new occupants hadn't redecorated much, other than the sign in the window. What was mostly odd was the new occupants themselves.

The man was Phoenix. For the most part. There was something a little different to how he talked. Probably because he spoke Japanese, and Maya was having a hell of a time translating. The girl behind him was another Maya, who spoke fluent Japanese and seemed to be attempting to translate the English spoken.

Maya: “Hell of a time”? I hope you mean I was having fun and not that it was hard! My native language is Japanese, you know!

Phoenix: Isn’t it English?

Maya: Well, living here pretty much demands everyone be fluent in that, but I learned my first language at home.

Phoenix: Yeah, but you were born here, weren’t you?

Maya: But my first and foremost language is still Japanese, so there!

Phoenix: (Yeesh, I was only asking.)

Quote:
The two Phoenix's stared at each other, then at the same time pointed. Phoenix shouted, "OBJECTION!" The other Phoenix shouted, "異議あり!"

Phoenix: Ah, so that’s what happened up to now.

Maya: Quiz time! You know what that word says, Nick?

Phoenix: (Quiz time…?) It says “Objection”, of course.

Maya: Oh, good. So you’ve been listening.

Phoenix: I’ve already known that word, thanks.

Maya: Oh, yeah? Then how about 推理?

Phoenix: …Now you’re just showing off.

Edgeworth: That’s just the word for “deduction” or “reasoning”.

Phoenix: You too!

Quote:
They stared at each other, fingers outstretched. Maya and Other Maya lost interest, instead returning to talk about food.

Maya: Mayoi and I know where the real priorities are.

Phoenix: No, I’m sure Naruhodo and I got our priorities straight. What has he done to my office!?

Maya: It’s both of yours and mine and Mayoi’s, you know.

Phoenix: …

Apollo: …So, uh, which one is which?

Maya: There’s no point to asking that, Apollo.

Quote:
As it turned out, other Phoenix's name was Ryuichi Naruhodo, and he was a lawyer from Japan. He worked on a lot of high profile cases, like the case of Chihiro Ayasato, and worked with an esteemed prosecutor, Reiji Mitsurugi. His assistant's name was Mayoi Ayasato.

They shared stories, through their associated translators (who weren't very good and often talked about food). About the strange clients, the stranger happenings...

... and that was what started Japanifornia.

Phoenix: I don’t think I like the implications of this fic.

Maya: Me neither! Mayoi and I would be great as translators!

Phoenix: That’s not an implication. It’s stated right there.

Maya: That doesn’t make it true.

Phoenix: I never said that…

Apollo: Wait, so… wouldn’t the meeting of two people of alternate universes be really dangerous if it were somehow possible?

Edgeworth: If you’re talking about collision of dimensional universes, most likely. However, in the context of this fic, it’s assumed to be within the same universe, but across different countries.

Apollo: In that case… why did Mr. Naruhodo take over Mr. Wright’s office?

Maya: ’Cause he needed an outpost in the States?

Phoenix: No one takes my office as an outpost. Not even alter-me.


Speakers: *click, click, click…* Yes! Done!

Phoenix: And the total is…?

Speakers: Subtracting the one I deducted, it comes to… 38 sins.

Phoenix: 38? It felt like a lot more than that.

Edgeworth: Did you count all the complaints we made on the fic, or were you counting based on the fic itself?

Speakers: On what you guys pick out, of course. If I had really counted all of them in the fic, I would never stop pressing this button.

Edgeworth: Then, that explains the difference. Honestly, some sins are worth more points than just one…

Maya: But I feel like we’d be ripping off from a certain movie critic’s system…

Apollo: Then again, this is the first time we’ve actually counted up any of it. I’m surprised it’s that low a number across three fics… but the second and third ones were pretty short, so I guess it makes sense.

Speakers: So, do I still have to keep counting?

Edgeworth: Do we have any other fics left? The lights haven’t lit up yet…

Speakers: Well, I mean this last one is a sort of bonus round, since it’s a special and all…

Edgeworth: Then, keep counting if you value your precious air time.

Speakers: Hmph…

Spoiler:
Speakers: No prompt this time, but it is still from the kink meme…

Edgeworth: Incidentally, what did you mean by “bonus round”? What’s different?

Speakers: The subject of said dog pile.

Edgeworth: …

Phoenix: Yet, I’ve had my fair share of getting piled on after you specifically told us I “wasn’t” the subject.

Speakers: You’re a special exception to even the special. I have no control over how much butt you can be to a joke.

Phoenix: …Don’t deconstruct slang like that ever again.

Fic:
Quote:
Out of character

Edgeworth: I sincerely hope this title is not referring to how “I” act throughout it, but given my chances in this theater, it’s likely all but inevitable.

Maya: Oh, you never know. It could be about how everyone else acts around you!

Edgeworth: Now that’s terrifying… because it’s just as plausible.

Quote:
"After you ignored my previous cease and desist warnings, I find myself compelled to denounce you for defamation." Edgeworth said through the phone. "And I'd be lying if I said I'm sorry of doing so." He then added in a more angry tone.

"Aw, c'mon Edgey-poo, I thought that a guy with such refined cultural interests like you would have appreciated my little thought." Wendy replied from the other side of the line.

Edgeworth: …At the very least, it seems I’m still composed.

Maya: So you can stop holding your breath?

Edgeworth: I wouldn’t count on it.

Phoenix: Make sure you can still breathe, Edgeworth. You would not want to faint in here because of that.

Speakers: Oh, relax. The floors have been cleaned recently.

Phoenix: That’s the least of the problems…

Quote:
"I'm pretty sure that the closest thing to you having any knowledge of my 'cultural interests', as you put it, is knowing that I accepted that Steel Samurai figurine you gave me."

"Precisely, my darling!" She answered, over enthusiastically. "You know the Steel Samurai is one of the fandoms with the highest number of online fanfictions, don't you?"

Heard those words, Edgeworth looked around and, instinctively and swiftly, closed a certain couple of tabs on his internet browser. "I... am aware if that fact, yes."

Edgeworth: And so the OOC moments begin…

Maya: Ah, that proves nothing! I always keep a couple tabs open for Steel Samurai fanfiction when I’m browsing!

Apollo: Isn’t that just you…?

Phoenix: You have a computer up at the village?

Maya: Of course not, silly! I’m talking about your computer!

Phoenix: Well, that’s funny. I seem to recall cleaning out my bookmarks and history recently.

Maya: …

Phoenix: I-I’m kidding, okay? They’re still there.

Apollo: They are?

Phoenix: Yeah, I just can’t get rid of Maya’s stuff… even if it IS my computer.

Maya: But you never use it anyway.

Phoenix: That doesn’t matter.

Quote:
"You understand now, Edgey-poo? Knowing we share this.interest, what better way to prove my love to you than writing a bunch of fanfics about you? Starring myself, of course!"

Edgeworth: …*twitch*

Maya: Whoa, Mr. Edgeworth’s lid blew off so hard I think it might have left a dent somewhere…

Phoenix: Be careful what you say, Maya. He’s at his worst when his lid’s been blown.

Quote:
Like everytime he was reminded of that, Edgeworth winced. "Most authors tend to disguise their self-insertions, you know..."

"Those are just cowards! When someone is in love they have to proudly show it to the world, announce it to everyone and everything and never be ashamed of their feelings! Back at my times that was the unwritten rule, and everyone followed it and the world was a better place, not like these days..."

Miles moved the phone away from his ear and put it on the table, waiting for that obnoxious sound to stop coming out of it before taking it up again. That took a good four minutes, according to his wrist watch.

Edgeworth: Please hang up. Just hang up. It’s not that difficult.

Phoenix: Well, maybe you’re conversing with her because you need to or are being forced to?

Edgeworth: *clutching head* Wright, please don’t say anything I already suspect myself…

Quote:
"So, are you finished explaining?" Edgeworth asked when he picked up the phone again.

"Well, mostly. But there's also that other time when I met with that famous actor-"

"As much as your anecdotes are interesting," he lied, "do I need to remind you that the reason why I called is because I'm about to take you to court, right?"

Phoenix: Oh, hey. I got it right.

Edgeworth: Oh, splendid. What shall we do to celebrate?

Phoenix: …No need to take it out on me.

Maya: …Wait, what if he actually lied about the latter part, the bit about taking her to court?

Apollo: M-Ms. Fey, please spare the rest of us and don’t go there…

Quote:
"No need to remind me. And the reason why I answered your call, aside from hearing your chirping voice, is because I'd like to know the reason why."

"The reason why?" Miles shouted, slamming his hand on the desk. "I'm a high profile figure, a state prosecutor for heaven's sake! I can't have things like... that just a click away from my personal page in every search engine!"

Edgeworth: *sigh* When will these fans realize that my computer at work is not for personal use…?

Maya: Well, I think it’s silly how some companies don’t allow free access across the net. Internet is supposed to be free for everyone!

Phoenix: Except some people still have work to do. They can’t spend it browsing fanfiction.

Maya: Well, it’s not like you have anything better to do, Nick.

Phoenix: Hey. Those bookmarks are yours, not mine.

Maya: You’re still free to check them yourself…

Quote:
"A click away? Wow, that means my fics must be sooo popular..." Wendy happily commented, giggling. "The internet has spoken, Edgey-poo, they want to see us together!"

"Over my dead body!" Miles blurted out. "Either you delete that account now, sparing me the nuisance of suing you, or I promise that when we'll be in court I'll be as merciless as I've never been before." He was almost growling.

Edgeworth: I appreciate that this author is honestly trying to keep me in character… but if so, I shouldn’t have even bothered to call her. That woman is impossible to talk to, in or out of court.

Phoenix: Given who you’re dealing with, I’d think ignoring her is the best way to go, really.

Edgeworth: Unforunately, the fic seems to suggest it’s a problem I couldn’t ignore.

Phoenix: What situation would that be? She’s just writing some terrible fanfiction. Surely, it hasn’t become blown so out of proportion that it’d be hitting the news?

Maya: Well, I hear sporkings have been really popular lately, so bad fanfiction has been popping up like crazy, and the really bad ones actually become popular. They’re pretty funny sometimes too!

Phoenix: Even then, they’re not going to be so viral that it’d be newsworthy. When have you ever heard of bad fanfiction hitting TV?

Apollo: So, how did Mr. Edgeworth in the fic actually find out about it so he would even consider suing her?

Speakers: Lovers of fanfiction converge on similar sites, after all.

All: …

Edgeworth: Just to be clear, everyone, I do not spend my time reading fanfiction of any sort outside of this theater.

Maya: Not even Steel Samurai?

Edgeworth: No. Any true fan of the series wouldn’t turn to writing their own stories based on the source… isn’t that right, Maya?

Maya: Hmm! Well said!

Phoenix: (…Nice save there, Edgeworth, but you’re not fooling anyone.)

Quote:
"Are your really sure there's not even one among my stories that you like? Not even that vanilla one where we get ourselves a trip to Paris? Or the X rated one with BDSM themes? It took me a month to write down that one..."

Edgeworth: *appalled*

Maya: …Maybe I shouldn’t ask this, but… what’s the vanilla one about?

Phoenix: Either way, they’re probably going to get the same reaction out of him.

Apollo: Just to be clear, this “Wendy” isn’t as old as she sounds, right…?

Phoenix: …Probably not.

Apollo: Whew. That’s a reli-

Phoenix: She’s probably older.

Apollo: *blank* …I see.

Maya: Uh-oh, Nick. I think you just broke Apollo.

Phoenix: He’ll recover… he has to.

Quote:
"No!" Miles screamed. "None of them! They're tasteless... ridiculous... poorly written... out of character..."

Maya: As if it wasn’t obvious enough, the author highlights the name drop! That counts as another sin, right? You know, like that guy who then says “Roll credits!”

Speakers: Nope. No way. Not until this fic is done.

Edgeworth: Which is when…?

Speakers: …Soon. A-and I’m still keeping track of the sin count, okay?

Phoenix: (Oh, yeah. I almost forgot about that.)

Quote:
"I'm not going to accept that last insinuation lying down, Edgey-poo. I'll have you know I won the interfandom Hurt/Comfort Writing Challenge with that story about you rescuing me from a fire..."

Apollo: Geez, how many has this old bag written?

Maya: Well, this Oldbag has always been chasing after Mr. Edgeworth ever since they first met, so…

Apollo: W-wait. On second thought, I don’t want to know.

Maya: That’s fine. I have no idea either!

Quote:
"Enough!" Edgeworth was starting to have difficulty breathing after yelling that much. "If this is your last word, then see you in court Ms. Oldbag. I hope you enjoy being humiliated in public by me as much as you wrote in the last fic you published."

Apollo: …Wait, this woman’s name is OLDBAG!?

Phoenix: You can imagine how often she was made fun of in her younger years.

Apollo: That’s just sad…

Quote:
"When you say it with that angry voice, I might not find it that arousing, Edgey-poo..."

"Good."

"Well then, since I kinda had the feeling it would have come down to this, I already sent my lawyer to see you.

Phoenix: …Oh, no. Please don’t be me, please don’t be me…

Speakers: It’s definitely you.

Quote:
I really love that stubborn side of you, but at times you're too stubborn... Anyway, he should there in a few minutes, and just so that you know he's also my beta, have fun talking with him. I can say for sure you'll be surprised when you'll see-"

Maya: Wow, he’s even a beta now?

Phoenix: Please don’t be me, please don’t be me…

Speakers: I already told you-

Edgeworth: Leave him to his hope… for the next five seconds.

Quote:
While the woman was talking, the door of Edgeworth's office opened, revealing a familiar blue-clad figure walking in.

Phoenix: D’oh!

Edgeworth: (Precisely five seconds. Not bad.)

Quote:
"Oh, h-hello Edgeworth... before you say anything, it's all Maya's fault. She's the one that got me into betaing. I swear I didn't know what that meant, I thought she was talking about sex!"

All: …

Maya: *slaps Nick*

Phoenix: Ow.

Maya: Sorry, Nick, but I just had to slap someone and you were closest.

Phoenix: It’s okay, Maya. Someone was bound to be OOC. It’s in the title, after all.


[At long last, the lights have returned.]

Speakers: And there we have it! Four fics in a roll! Whoo, what an exhilarating adventure!

Maya: Hey, don’t forget the sin count! Where are we now?

Speakers: 45 sins. Technically 46, but I deducted one for your out-of-bounds comment.

Maya: Ah, that’s fair. 45 across four fics? Not bad! Most of them came from the first one where Ficpollo and later Fake-umi was being such a jerk to everyone.

Apollo: “Fake-umi”?

Maya: I’m not talking about “fake seas”, mind you! Maybe I should have gone with “Fakumi”…

Phoenix: Yeah, other than that one, the rest were pretty lenient.

Edgeworth: Even the bonus round wasn’t nearly as bad as I feared.

Maya: And I think I know what’s the mystery theme this time: being totally meta!

Speakers: That’s right! I’m the kind to come with these themes, you know. If you guys are up for another round of the kink meme…

All: No thanks.

Speakers: But think of the fun we’d have solving that theme riddle!

Maya: Tempting, but even I’ll say “no thanks”. Not unless Kay joins us for the next one…

Speakers: Oh, that can be arranged…

Maya: In fact, I think the next one should be themed around us girls!

Speakers: Hey. I’m the one coming up with the theme… but that isn’t a bad idea.

Maya: Right? I’m sure you guys can pull off something interesting!

Phoenix: Maya, why are you getting so buddy-buddy with them? Have you forgotten what they’ve shown you before?

Maya: Oh, Nick… you’ve gotta stop lingering in the past! Think about what kind of bright future may await us! This is why you’re always stuck on those narrow-minded cultural assumptions of yours…

Speakers: Speaking of present, I hear there’s one on Halloween coming up.

Maya: *gasp* Will there be candy?

Speakers: Of course.

Maya: Then I’ll be here! And maybe bring along Pearly! And Kay, and Trucy, and Athena…

Speakers: Again, I’m the one who gets to decide that! Now shoo, all of you! We need time for preparations for the next sporking.

[And on a surprisingly positive note, at least for one of them, the sporkers take their leave. Who knows what delectable treats await them next time…?]

Speakers: …Ah, crud! I forgot to give Phoenix a shock at the end of things!

[Well, technically, Maya did slap him in the end.]

Speakers: B-but what about my part!? Noooo… *sob*

[Erm… Well, see you all next time and have a wonderful Halloween!]
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Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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That was quick.
But I already know it's gonna be good. :edgey:
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Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title

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Rubia Ryu the Royal wrote:
WhatTheWhat wrote:
Rubia is part of the management, duh. They don't know that, because she's an undercover boss.


If Airey is Batman, does that make me the Joker?


Yep. If anything, Oliver would be Harley Quinn.

...Now who would be Robin?
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WhatTheWhat wrote:
Rubia Ryu the Royal wrote:
WhatTheWhat wrote:
Rubia is part of the management, duh. They don't know that, because she's an undercover boss.


If Airey is Batman, does that make me the Joker?


Yep. If anything, Oliver would be Harley Quinn.

...Now who would be Robin?

I'm 12, I'd be Robin you stinky head. (My insults are on point today.)

Robin alternates between silly and serious, who else does...? *cough*
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Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title

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I totally did NOT sneak into a bathroom to type this

Harley. Quinn. You're too evil to be Robin. You're also part of the management. You fill in for Rubia when she goes to the vet.

Now who could be Robin...

Why don't you guys just email a sporking to each other, while posting comments and editing mistakes. It'll be like a collab, except the usual characters could be the management, and you guys could be the sporkers!

Sigh. Back to reality. :larry:
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Last edited by WhatTheWhat on Mon Oct 26, 2015 12:12 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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...Your death will be slow and painful.
Oh fuck I just proved your point
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@ArrowLawn, where are all these new sporkers coming from? :udgey: Anyway, good job for your first spork! I don't usually chuckle so much during someone's first sporking, so congrats! I liked your choice of characters and they worked smoothly together. One thing I'd have to say though, is that you have the characters refer to each other by name too much that it sounds unnatural. I believe that Pessimistic said something to cuteyounggirlplus about the same thing. Just be a bit more careful in the future. Otherwise, good job!

Last edited by Skittlemask on Mon Oct 26, 2015 7:08 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Sorry for the double post, but I accidently pressed quote instead of edit, so uh, this post never happened.
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Skittlemask wrote:
Skittlemask wrote:
luck wrote:
And a question for Skittle: Are you still doing Athena's punishment?

Yep! Just that collabs take a bit longer.

Rocket wrote:
Quick Question: Does anyone know where I can find a DD era Edgeworth smiley? One with the glasses?


I just looked through the New Smilies thread and I didn't see any. I would make one, but I'm not very good at doing that, haha.


Edit: And yes, the first quote did indeed say Oliver wrote it before. Just putting this here so that he doesn't look crazy in the post below.

Silly Skittle... I'm already crazy. :)
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Excellent sporking as always, Rubia!
Oh, and bad fanfiction has actually been in the news before - and no, I'm not talking about Fifty Shades of Gray or some other badfic-turned-published-book. :hotti:

@WhatTheWhat: E-mailing a sporking back and forth wouldn't work, partly because it's much better to do things as real-time as possible, and partly because we have so many people involved. A better option would be a/several group chat session(s) (like a Skype conversation or some online chatroom) or a Google doc we all have editing access to.

ETA: I should probably get my Halloween sporking done before Halloween, so does anyone have any fic recs?
Also, does anyone have a LiveJournal? I was thinking about text colors...
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AireyVerkhovensky wrote:
ETA: I should probably get my Halloween sporking done before Halloween, so does anyone have any fic recs?


You can look here. The one that seems to be the worst is The Halloween Party, but its 8 chapters
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Okay, I think I found a "good" one.
...although the vampire AU Wrightworth one is also tempting, if only because I'm in the middle of my own vampire AU Wrightworth fic. :yogi:
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Yatta.

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Location: LA, Japanifornia

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Joined: Mon Jun 18, 2012 6:17 am

Posts: 6065

AireyVerkhovensky wrote:
Excellent sporking as always, Rubia!
Oh, and bad fanfiction has actually been in the news before - and no, I'm not talking about Fifty Shades of Gray or some other badfic-turned-published-book. :hotti:

After scrolling through a pointless conversation about Batman characters, I finally find someone leaving a comment on my work.
Aha... so it's true. Badfic authors truly do get away with anything. Then again, it's a publication that wasn't viral enough to be "easily accessible" (aka people had to actively search for it), so the whole case was a moot point anyway.

Quote:
@WhatTheWhat: E-mailing a sporking back and forth wouldn't work, partly because it's much better to do things as real-time as possible, and partly because we have so many people involved. A better option would be a/several group chat session(s) (like a Skype conversation or some online chatroom) or a Google doc we all have editing access to.

ETA: I should probably get my Halloween sporking done before Halloween, so does anyone have any fic recs?
Also, does anyone have a LiveJournal? I was thinking about text colors...

Actually, Google Docs is a good idea. I was thinking of the same. We could also meet up on Skype (though I'll have to find some way to log back into my account; it's been ages) for easier communication.

And what's this about text colors on LJ?
Help! My parents are Phoenix Wright & Miles Edgeworth! Er, I mean they're irresponsible drunks!

Click here for the Gyakuten Saiban vs Ace Attorney Translation Project Blog!
Various official AA stuff translations currently in the works.

Also, click here for the current archive of fanfiction or here for the backup archive. Click here for the blog that updates it.
Includes translations of misc. fan works related or not to AA.
Also, a very popular fanfic ask meme.
Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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Cause of death is being dummy

Gender: Female

Location: Metropolitan Atlanta

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Yeah, I think Google Docs might be our best bet, although a Skype group would be interesting.

I don't know if this is still the case (hasn't used LJ since 2012), but you used to be able to change the text colors. My brother and I used to do all of our sporkings with each sporking being differentiated by color.
Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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Yatta.

Gender: Female

Location: LA, Japanifornia

Rank: Ace Attorney

Joined: Mon Jun 18, 2012 6:17 am

Posts: 6065

I haven't used LJ in a while either since around 2013-ish (excluding kink meme 'cause it's kink meme), but I think it should still work. And when in doubt, we could always force color in by way of html codes. Not sure if it'd work on tumblr. I could try it.
Help! My parents are Phoenix Wright & Miles Edgeworth! Er, I mean they're irresponsible drunks!

Click here for the Gyakuten Saiban vs Ace Attorney Translation Project Blog!
Various official AA stuff translations currently in the works.

Also, click here for the current archive of fanfiction or here for the backup archive. Click here for the blog that updates it.
Includes translations of misc. fan works related or not to AA.
Also, a very popular fanfic ask meme.
Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
User avatar

Cause of death is being dummy

Gender: Female

Location: Metropolitan Atlanta

Rank: Prosecutor

Joined: Thu May 22, 2014 12:23 pm

Posts: 812

I don't think it works on Tumblr. I've tried before and I don't think they changed it.
Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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Yatta.

Gender: Female

Location: LA, Japanifornia

Rank: Ace Attorney

Joined: Mon Jun 18, 2012 6:17 am

Posts: 6065

No, it does. I just tried it now. You have to go to the HTML format from the drop-down option menu (upper right) of text posts. Use the <font color="___"></font> tags. The blank should be filled with hex codes (w/ #).
Help! My parents are Phoenix Wright & Miles Edgeworth! Er, I mean they're irresponsible drunks!

Click here for the Gyakuten Saiban vs Ace Attorney Translation Project Blog!
Various official AA stuff translations currently in the works.

Also, click here for the current archive of fanfiction or here for the backup archive. Click here for the blog that updates it.
Includes translations of misc. fan works related or not to AA.
Also, a very popular fanfic ask meme.
Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
User avatar

Cause of death is being dummy

Gender: Female

Location: Metropolitan Atlanta

Rank: Prosecutor

Joined: Thu May 22, 2014 12:23 pm

Posts: 812

Just tried it, but when it posted the text was black. I was trying to make it this color.

Edit: Wait, it's orange on my blog. I think you're onto something.

Second edit: I'm going to abuse the crap outta this. ...well, if there were a way to directly upload images like the Rich Text editor lets you... plus HTML is a hassle... Maybe I should just go try to remember my LJ password? Unless it also makes you use raw HTML. I don't remember.
Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
User avatar

Yatta.

Gender: Female

Location: LA, Japanifornia

Rank: Ace Attorney

Joined: Mon Jun 18, 2012 6:17 am

Posts: 6065

I still say we stick to Google Docs for the actual editing, though. tumblr can be where the final result is published. Needless to say, I'll promote it on my main blog as an exception.

So, when should we get started on it?

Edit: I've never published anything on LJ before, so I can't say for sure.
Help! My parents are Phoenix Wright & Miles Edgeworth! Er, I mean they're irresponsible drunks!

Click here for the Gyakuten Saiban vs Ace Attorney Translation Project Blog!
Various official AA stuff translations currently in the works.

Also, click here for the current archive of fanfiction or here for the backup archive. Click here for the blog that updates it.
Includes translations of misc. fan works related or not to AA.
Also, a very popular fanfic ask meme.
Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
User avatar

Cause of death is being dummy

Gender: Female

Location: Metropolitan Atlanta

Rank: Prosecutor

Joined: Thu May 22, 2014 12:23 pm

Posts: 812

Who else is joining us?
Also what are we sporking?
Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
User avatar

Yatta.

Gender: Female

Location: LA, Japanifornia

Rank: Ace Attorney

Joined: Mon Jun 18, 2012 6:17 am

Posts: 6065

Still waiting on Skittle and luck to let us know when they're ready, I believe. In the meantime, I'm still searching for an ungodly awful fic. :)

Edit: Got myself locked out of my own LJ account, hooray. Changed password, so maybe I'll get to that in a bit...
Help! My parents are Phoenix Wright & Miles Edgeworth! Er, I mean they're irresponsible drunks!

Click here for the Gyakuten Saiban vs Ace Attorney Translation Project Blog!
Various official AA stuff translations currently in the works.

Also, click here for the current archive of fanfiction or here for the backup archive. Click here for the blog that updates it.
Includes translations of misc. fan works related or not to AA.
Also, a very popular fanfic ask meme.
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