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Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title

I ship P/M. No. Not that one! Or that...

Gender: Male

Location: Irgendwo in 'nem Revier

Rank: Suspect

Joined: Wed May 27, 2015 7:01 pm

Posts: 34

(Well, I better refrain from positive and negative Sahwits. It was quite good, though boring at times...)
(Found the second!
:sahwit: :sahwit: :sahwit: :sahwit:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11137779/1/ )
Got to many chars beginnin' with M here. Thats why Edgey must be a Fey. Too important and too beginning with an M not to be one.

Ktoś widział moją Berettę? Chcę zastrzelić faceta na którego czekają Vladimir i Estragon
Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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____

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Manfred x Damon new OTP confirmed?
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Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title

Avatars are for less anxious people.

Gender: None specified

Rank: Decisive Witness

Joined: Thu Jun 18, 2015 7:20 pm

Posts: 171

I found this fic. It's called "Turnabout Harem". It's about Nick and Apollo getting a harem. Also, Incest!Trucy.

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/7693463/1/Turnabout-Harem
Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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____

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I can't be bothered reading it at the moment... But incestuous Trucy?
Why does this keep happening?
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Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title

I ship P/M. No. Not that one! Or that...

Gender: Male

Location: Irgendwo in 'nem Revier

Rank: Suspect

Joined: Wed May 27, 2015 7:01 pm

Posts: 34

(I have a question, is there a ship which has many sporkable fics compared to the number of fics aviable for it? (Quantity wise Narumitsu and Phaya obviously would win...)(Imdont count :trucy: / :apollo: since incest is ALWAYS sporkable)
Got to many chars beginnin' with M here. Thats why Edgey must be a Fey. Too important and too beginning with an M not to be one.

Ktoś widział moją Berettę? Chcę zastrzelić faceta na którego czekają Vladimir i Estragon
Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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Yatta.

Gender: Female

Location: LA, Japanifornia

Rank: Ace Attorney

Joined: Mon Jun 18, 2012 6:17 am

Posts: 6065

If you're asking about which ship is more suitable for sporking, I don't think there's a particular ship that is... aside from the incestuous ones, the underaged rape ones, or some crack pairings from hell... sometimes, literal hell.

In any case, what the sporking should focus on is not the pairing in particular, but anything else that might be "wrong" or "disturbing" to it. Remember, we're not here to rant on which pairings are best (or worst). We're here to rant on all of them except the canon ones. ;)
Help! My parents are Phoenix Wright & Miles Edgeworth! Er, I mean they're irresponsible drunks!

Click here for the Gyakuten Saiban vs Ace Attorney Translation Project Blog!
Various official AA stuff translations currently in the works.

Also, click here for the current archive of fanfiction or here for the backup archive. Click here for the blog that updates it.
Includes translations of misc. fan works related or not to AA.
Also, a very popular fanfic ask meme.
Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title

I ship P/M. No. Not that one! Or that...

Gender: Male

Location: Irgendwo in 'nem Revier

Rank: Suspect

Joined: Wed May 27, 2015 7:01 pm

Posts: 34

(Well, I could rant on a bad GummyxMaggey fic. Or a bad DeLite fanfic. Or, Feenris for that matter (I don't count Godkt x Mia as canon, and relucantly Diego x Mia. For my headcannon
(:mia: / :diego:
:godot: -> :mia))
Got to many chars beginnin' with M here. Thats why Edgey must be a Fey. Too important and too beginning with an M not to be one.

Ktoś widział moją Berettę? Chcę zastrzelić faceta na którego czekają Vladimir i Estragon
Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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Yatta.

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Joined: Mon Jun 18, 2012 6:17 am

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Well, my point was that canon pairings should not be sporked just because someone doesn't like that pairing or like that. They should be sporked if they're stupid because of other things.
Help! My parents are Phoenix Wright & Miles Edgeworth! Er, I mean they're irresponsible drunks!

Click here for the Gyakuten Saiban vs Ace Attorney Translation Project Blog!
Various official AA stuff translations currently in the works.

Also, click here for the current archive of fanfiction or here for the backup archive. Click here for the blog that updates it.
Includes translations of misc. fan works related or not to AA.
Also, a very popular fanfic ask meme.
Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title

I ship P/M. No. Not that one! Or that...

Gender: Male

Location: Irgendwo in 'nem Revier

Rank: Suspect

Joined: Wed May 27, 2015 7:01 pm

Posts: 34

(True, luckily I can spork many crack pairings. Expect :kristoph: / :dahlia: they somehow... work out, even though it is a match made in hell, but it scarily works out...)
Got to many chars beginnin' with M here. Thats why Edgey must be a Fey. Too important and too beginning with an M not to be one.

Ktoś widział moją Berettę? Chcę zastrzelić faceta na którego czekają Vladimir i Estragon
Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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Location: Japanifornia

Rank: Medium-in-training

Joined: Sat Aug 29, 2015 6:24 pm

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It could work out, but it's still quite disturbing. Damn, they could destroy the world together.
Image

Gregory... Tomorrow, I'm heading towards that fateful place with your son. To find out the truth of 18 years ago...
Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title

Avatars are for less anxious people.

Gender: None specified

Rank: Decisive Witness

Joined: Thu Jun 18, 2015 7:20 pm

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@Ryseik

I posted two stories featuring Manfred Von Karma raping underage Edgeworth a while ago...
Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title

The Edgy Attorney

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Location: Illinois

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I don't know why, but I feel like my fic is somehow gonna end up getting sporked because of how absurd the concept is.
Image
The fate of two worlds lies in the hands of three lawyers...

A crossover nobody asked for coming never
Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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____

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Now that you've brought it up in going to search far and wide for it...
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Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title

The Edgy Attorney

Gender: Male

Location: Illinois

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Oliver wrote:
Now that you've brought it up in going to search far and wide for it...


You already know where it is, I've shown you cases 1 and 2 :godot:
Image
The fate of two worlds lies in the hands of three lawyers...

A crossover nobody asked for coming never
Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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____

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Oh.
Oooooooooooh..
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!
That one!
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Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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Cause of death is being dummy

Gender: Female

Location: Metropolitan Atlanta

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Joined: Thu May 22, 2014 12:23 pm

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No shame in your stuff getting sporked. :hotti:
Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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____

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I bet you can't even find it because of WHERE the fic is.
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Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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____

Gender: Male

Location: Location

Rank: Ace Attorney

Joined: Tue Jul 28, 2015 6:40 am

Posts: 2457

Who Cares? Apollo x Trucy
I... Don't need to explain.
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Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title

The Edgy Attorney

Gender: Male

Location: Illinois

Rank: Suspect

Joined: Tue Sep 15, 2015 1:09 am

Posts: 30

How many times are you going to say also, writer?
Image
The fate of two worlds lies in the hands of three lawyers...

A crossover nobody asked for coming never
Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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____

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Rank: Ace Attorney

Joined: Tue Jul 28, 2015 6:40 am

Posts: 2457

I don't think I've ever said also, writer...
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Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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Apologize to the funyarinpa!

Gender: Female

Location: Bristol, Rhode Island

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Joined: Tue May 14, 2013 10:21 pm

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I recently visited the Wayback Machine to see if Blahmoomoo missed anything the last time they went looking for sporks, and I found Revriley's sporking of JAck and Franceska.

To be clear, the only known sporks saved from the old thread are-

Neni's sporking of chapter 1 of TASTE THE RAINBOW, although you'll have to deal with all apostrophes, dashes, and quotation marks as �

Neni's sporking of Phoenix's Turnabout on dropbox.

and of course, Revriley's sporking of JAck and Franceska.
Re: Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!Topic%20Title
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Yatta.

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Location: LA, Japanifornia

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Joined: Mon Jun 18, 2012 6:17 am

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Even the shortest of fics can bring so much out from me...

Featured fic: phoenix wright: aced love man

Cast: :phoenix: :maya: :franny: :kay:

Overall rating: :sahwit: :sahwit: :sahwit: :sahwit:
This piece is as lovey-dovey as an angry Pomeranian with rabies and a troll-swatter. That is all.

--------------------------------------------

[In the aftermath of our wonderful Halloween celebrations, we return to our usual Sporking Theater… which is currently in the process of being cleaned by on-duty robots.]

Kay: Wow! They really do have robot maids! It’s like a shot right out of Jetsons!

Maya: Now if only they have robots to feed us when we order something from the snack bar…

Kay: Who knows? Maybe they do! Wanna check?

Maya: You bet! I’m there!

[And the perky teenagers rush off for snacks, leaving a pair of lawyers in a tense atmosphere.]

Phoenix: …

Franziska: …

Speakers: Ah, welcome back, Sporkers. As fun as it was last time getting hyped on sugar and fics, now it’s time we all… Where are the girls?

Phoenix: Where else? Snacks.

Franziska: What’s this about sugar and fics?

Speakers: Oh, that’s right. You weren’t around for our Halloween parties, Ms. von Karma.

Franziska: Feh. I wouldn’t waste my time attending one of your pathetic masquerades. They’re practically guaranteed to come with fics that would ruin anyone’s sense of fun.

Speakers: Oh, but we had a blast, didn’t we, Mr. Wright?

Phoenix: If by “blast”, you mean “fics like explosive diarrhea”, then yes… what a blast.

Franziska: …Don’t tell me there were any with actual diarrhea involved.

Phoenix: Nah, the so-called horror fics they provided were too dull even for that.

Franziska: Hmph… then it was wise of me to have stayed away.

Phoenix: (Would you seriously consider stopping by in the first place…?)

[The girls have returned… carrying buckets of leftover sweets from Halloween.]

Maya: No auto-feeding robots, but at least they have automatic dispensers! Talk about convenient!

Kay: Too bad the candies they have are all leftovers. Guess the Management was too drunk to restock.

Speakers: Excuse you, Kay Faraday, but we don’t ever drink until we’re drunk.

Kay: Hmm… so you admit you do drink?

Speakers: I admit nothing.

Phoenix: (…Yeah, that denial is not sincere.)

Franziska: *cracks at air* Enough about the party! Can we just get this over with, whatever it is?

Speakers: My, my. Someone sounds sour. I suppose it makes sense since you haven’t had any sweets today…

Franziska: *points w/ whip* For your information, I had easy access to gourmet delights that you people would never be able to acquire for yourselves.

Speakers: Actually, it depends on if it’s worth shipping from overseas.

Maya: What!? Of course it’s worth it! I haven’t even heard what they are and they sound tasty!

Kay: And expensive! Maybe even worth stealing a glance…?

Franziska: …And why are you two looking at me like that? *raises whip*

Maya, Kay: …Never mind.

Maya: It’s probably not worth the whip…

Phoenix: (…Were they really expecting anything else from Franziska?)

Speakers: Alright, enough idle chatter. We’ve got a request to fulfill, so let’s get to it! *claps twice*

[Zapped them in, sir.]

Speakers: Good man, Narrator. *swigs a shot*

[…Er, sir? Are you drinking on the job?]

Speakers: Please, that description was so vague, I could have swigged up a shot of any drink.

[If you say so…]

Spoiler:
Phoenix: Maya! Move your buckets of candy. These are cup holders, not for buckets!

Maya: Then you hold one! I can’t hold two and Kay already has her own!

Phoenix: (It’s all leftover candy anyway. Just toss it…)

Maya: No way, José! Besides, it’s free, so your wallet doesn’t get to complain!

Phoenix: (It’s not my wallet that complains, you know.)

Title:
Quote:
pheonix wright: aced love man

Maya: *mouthful* Oh, Nick, it’s one of your fics!

Phoenix: I wouldn’t put it as “my” fic because I didn’t and wouldn’t write it.

Franziska: Ugh… Just what is wrong with these idiots who fail to write in proper English!? You can’t call it a title if it’s not highlighted as one!

Speakers: Well, it’s what’s written at the top of the page, so it’s still safe to assume…

Franziska: It’s NOT a title, and that’s final! *crack*

Phoenix: …Thanks, Ms. von Karma. I really needed more pain.

Franziska: There’s more where that came from if you’re that desperate, Phoenix Wright.

Phoenix: No, I’m good.

Description:
Quote:
a god summons characters from other dimensions so phoenix can fall in love

Maya: Wait, so he ISN’T a pimp yet?

Phoenix: Where did that come from!?

Maya: I mean, I thought by “aced” that he would already be an, ahem, “ace” at it.

Phoenix: Even if that was the case, it still wouldn’t make sense.

Kay: Or maybe it’s the other meaning of “ace”?

Phoenix: …Nor does that.

Franziska: Ha! How fitting, Phoenix Wright. I knew you were always doomed to be unfit to wed.

Phoenix: For the record, Ms. von Karma, the “ace” in “Ace Attorney” means I’m a specialist, not an asexual.

Kay: Speaking of “ace attorney”, I wonder what that means for Mr. Edgeworth…

Maya: *snicker* Good point. He really is that clueless when it comes to romance.

Franziska: That’s only expected. A stiff-lip like him wouldn’t know how to avoid upsetting the people he meets.

Phoenix: (Poor Edgeworth… he’s not even here to defend himself, and I’m sure not going to.)

Chapter 1:
Quote:
pheonix wright: ace loved man

Franziska: …Isn’t this just the same as the title, aside from a single transmutation of a letter!?

Speakers: It’s still different.

Franziska: It’s one letter of difference, and “Phoenix Wright” still isn’t spelled correctly!

Speakers: Come now, Franziska von Karma. The English language is so diverse that a single letter transmutation between words makes for a completely different scenario.

Franziska: That doesn’t work here! Either this or the title must have a typo!

Speakers: But you can’t prove they’re meant to be the same.

Franziska: …Urk…

Kay: Okay, so now he’s either a master of being loved or that he’s clueless that he’s being loved.

Maya: Well, we can cross off the latter because that’s actually in-character!

Phoenix: Nice try, Maya, but I’ve actually been in a relationship before.

Maya: Yeah, but it didn’t turn out very well.

Phoenix: …

Maya: Um… sorry, that was a low blow.

Phoenix: Don’t worry about it. It’s all in the past.

Quote:
so 1 dya maya was chaneling mia for phoenix and mia and phoenix were mkaing out then the god of universes showed up and he was like "hey u makng wit dead guy"

All: …

Franziska: *yanking on whip, muttering* …No, I will resist. As a von Karma, I will not let my composure be swayed…

Phoenix: (Wow, she’s actually trembling…)

Maya: So, uh… what exactly is this “god of universes”?

Kay: Apparently, he knows Mr. Wright is a hopeless lover.

Phoenix: He must be incredibly bored to take interest to me…

Maya: Or maybe he’s just as desperate for love that he’s turned to you.

Kay: Or into him…

Phoenix: …I-I don’t like where this conversation is going. Could we please change it?

Quote:
"i hook up u with rela girlfriwend/boyfriend" then a portal opened up and broly appeared "phoenix-sama, defend me!" mia screamed as she grabbed his crotch.

Phoenix: …This “god of universes” is definitely bored to want me tortured.

Maya: Yeow, that actually looks painful… not that I’d know, but still…

Kay: Wow, random crossover much? Even Broly’s here.

Maya: Guess he got tired of hunting for Goku and wanted to chase someone new.

Phoenix: Unfortunately, I’m nowhere near that sort of power level, so I think fic-me is just about dead.

Kay: But maybe he’s not here to kill fic-you?

Phoenix: (…Then, there’s only one other choice…)

Quote:
and then broly killed maya/mia and phoenix was sad.

Maya: What!? Oh, come on! It’s barely been a few sentences in, and I’m already out!?

Phoenix: Apparently, fic-me was just as disappointed.

Maya: He should be more than disappointed! Fight back, you wimp! Avenge fic-me!

Phoenix: I may not be him, but even I can’t figure out how.

Maya: Of course you’re not him, and that’s why he has a fighting chance!

Phoenix: …What’s that supposed to mean?

Kay: Plot armor.

Phoenix: Figures…

Quote:
phoenix called pearl when all of a sudden a whip broke phoen.

Phoenix: Ow…

Kay: Whoa! Clean in two!

Maya: Hmph, that’ll teach him to ask Pearly to channel someone he can make out with.

Phoenix: Fic-me may not be very respectable, but even he didn’t deserve that…

Franziska: Really?

Phoenix: …… Then again…

Quote:
"Phoenix, you foolish foolhearted sex monster" said FRANZISKSA VON KARMA and they got in bed and everything was fixed.

Franziska: Argh!

Phoenix: So this is what that “God of Universes” meant…?

Franziska: It’s “Franziska”! And nothing can be “fixed” by getting into bed with that foolish fraud with a fetish for the dead!

Maya: Aw… if only there was a word in English that meant “dead” and started with an f-sound…

Franziska: Of course there is… It’s called “Phoenix Wright”.

Phoenix: Even fic-me isn’t dead yet. How can you say that?

Franziska: He will be once I’m through with him!

Phoenix: Um… unfortunately, there’s an obstruction between you and him… Augh! Owowowow…!

Franziska: Of course I know that! And you’re the closest thing to him! *crackity-crack*

Phoenix: Ah! Ow! E-enough already!

Speakers: …I could watch this all day.

Maya, Kay: *munching & spectating*

Phoenix: O-objection! Someone stop her!

Franziska: Hmph. That was a mere ten lashes and you’re already caving.

Phoenix: (Ten lashes is ten too much! *whine*…)

Chapter 2:
Quote:
pheeonxi wright: acer lover man

Kay: Huh? Chapter 2 already? That was fast.

Maya: At this rate, we’ll be done in no time! Isn’t that great, Nick?

Phoenix: Ugh… (My arm became numb…)

Franziska: Tch… this foolish author only knows how to make a further fool of themself.

Kay: At least this time, the chapter title used the right letter for the “lover man” bit.

Franziska: And sacrificed everything else. What is the point of repeating the same phrase over again?

Maya: Emphasis on a running gag?

Franziska: By the time I’m through with it, it won’t have anywhere to run.

All: …

Speakers: That one just rolled off and died somewhere.

Franziska: I dare you to do better!

Speakers: What is there to say? It’s a running gag, so like time, it’ll keep on running for the ages…

Maya: Wow, that was poetic.

Franziska: … *crack*

Phoenix: Urgh… (That wasn’t even my fault.)

Quote:
AN: SCION 141 STOP TROLL ME OR ILL STOP WRIGHTING

Kay: Ha! Of course, the obligatory “don’t troll me, I’m busy trolling others” complaint!

Maya: I wonder about that “Wrighting” pun. Does the author mean they’ll stop writing or doing whatever the heck they’re doing with Nick? Or is it both?

Franziska: Whatever the case, I doubt the author would quit either.

Phoenix: Or maybe it’s actually a plea for help from this “Scion” to stop this “troll” that the author identifies as themself.

Kay: Oh, that’s a good point! But what about the “ill stop wrighting” part?

Maya: Hmm, “ill stop”… like a stop at the doctor’s?

Phoenix: So in other words… if Scion 141 doesn’t stop this troll, I’ll be sent to the hospital?

All: …

Maya: Wow, it actually became something coherent and sensible.

Kay: Not bad, Mr. Wright. Well played.

Quote:
so pheonx got out of bed and was liek "oh hey didnt a god send a weird thing"

Phoenix: Er… no?

Maya: What do you mean, Nick? A “God of Universes” did bring you something.

Kay: Yeah, Franziska von Karma!

Franziska: And the death of Maya Fey.

Maya: Oh… yeah.

Phoenix: See, Maya, this is why we should all just say “no”. It was all just a dream…

Quote:
and thn al of suden, BROLY shows up is like "HEY SWEETIEKINS, I'M HERE TO GIVE YOU SOME SWEET LOVING! FABULOUS!" broly forcd pheenie on the bed.

Phoenix: AAAAHH!! (I knew this was gonna happen…)

Quote:
phenix then thrw papes at broly killing broly to death.

Phoenix: (Whew.)

Maya: Well, that was anticlimactic.

Kay: Those are some amazing papers! Were they enchanted?

Franziska: …What “papers”? It clearly says “papes”.

Kay: Papes? Wait, you mean it’s an actual word?

Franziska: A pape is an informal name for a painted bunting.

Maya: …Which is?

Franziska: It’s a bunting, a species of finch.

Kay: So… Mr. Ficwright just threw a bunch of birds at Broly and that killed him.

Phoenix: …Well, I have to admit I’m just a bit impressed.

Quote:
phen ix then walked on the stret nwhne all of sudn, HOLY SHT it was batman. batman said "hi there baby" and phenix was all leik "OMG" and phenix died the end

Phoenix: …

Kay: Wow… that was even more anticlimactic.

Maya: When we thought it wouldn’t get any more so…

Franziska: This is why you should never hold any expectations for trollfics.

Phoenix: At least it’s over…

Speakers: Oh, but you would be wrong.

All: What? Still!?

Chapter 3:
Quote:
phoenix WRONG ace lvuveered man

Phoenix: …Okay, then.

Maya: At least your first name is spelled correctly this time.

Phoenix: I guess it’d be deserving of that stupid pun…

Kay: But what the heck is “lvuveered”? That can’t be a word, right?

Franziska: Of course not! There is no such word in English that starts with two nasal consonants! It’s impractical and difficult to pronounce!

Maya: If I were to take a guess… I’d go with “live a-feared”.

Kay: Hm… That makes some sense.

Phoenix: No, it makes no sense. How is fic-me supposed to “live a-feared” when he’s no longer living?

Maya: Maybe he was channeled back alive? Fic-Pearly was still around.

Franziska: Considering that my whip snapped him apart and he was still put back together again, what’s keeping him from staying dead?

Kay: Well, he is known as “Phoenix Wright”…

Phoenix: No, stop. Don’t bring my namesake into this, please…

Quote:
pheunx woke up in teh murning. mia was in his bed with all her clothes on. pheenie was disappoint.

All but Franziska: Huh?

Franziska: As I thought, everything would be set right again as dictated by the author.

Maya: Ah-hah… so the proclaimed “God of Universes” is actually a self-insert.

Kay: I figured so, but it seemed so obvious that I had second thoughts.

Phoenix: So, it’s become that every chapter is just fic-me waking from one dream, only to end up in another?

Kay: Yeah, it’s so lame… why couldn’t we have a brilliant firebird show up from nowhere?

Franziska: Because this author has a poor sense of imagination.

Maya: I personally would have gone with “Fic-Nick has time-traveling powers!”

Phoenix: Why not some power to break this loop of endless dreams…?

Maya, Kay: Then the fic will end.

Phoenix: Isn’t that a good thing?

Quote:
phenix left his luver and went to the courthouse. they were holding btman trial for the murder of peneix wright.

All: …

Maya: I KNEW it! Fic-Nick does have time-traveling powers!

Kay: Or maybe he has duplicating powers?

Franziska: Perish the thought! The last thing we’d need now is more Phoenix Wright clones onscreen!

Phoenix: Whatever those powers are, at least fic-me doesn’t have to worry about anyone dying permanently.

Maya: In that case, will fic-me make a return?

Phoenix: Probably not, since fic-Mia was brought back, but there’s no mention of fic-you…

Maya: …This author stinks and has no imagination.

Quote:
wright saw edgeypookittenmittens his other luver.

Phoenix: Ugh! I knew something like this was coming, but that name is just tasteless!

Kay: But “kitten mittens” sounds adorable.

Maya: It’s weird hearing anyone other than Oldbag calling him that, though.

Kay: …Has that old lady called Mr. Edgeworth anything other than “Edgey-poo”?

Maya: Not that I know, but it sounds like something she’d call him anyway.

Franziska: Hmm… it’s unfortunate Miles isn’t here to see this. I’m sure he would have gotten a kick from it.

Phoenix: (A kickback, is more like it.)

Speakers: Well, if you insist, we could bring him over now…

Franziska: …Well?

Speakers: But nah, I’m too lazy to call him up.

Kay: Aw, come on!

Phoenix: (You don’t even have any buttons to push! How much lazier can you get?)

Quote:
JUDGE was like "YO MUTHERFUCKERS, LET'S GET THIS STARTED."

Phoenix: …Looks like at least someone is still excited.

Maya: When is that old fuddy-duddy ever not?

Franziska: When Phoenix Wright fails at one of his transparent bluffs.

Maya: Oh, right.

Phoenix: (Same goes for when the prosecution fails their transparent bluffs…)

Quote:
edgeykitens(my lover) was like "YO, I CALL BEL TO THE STAND" Bel was a mentally retarded penguin pokemon.

Maya: Hey! Penguin Pokémon are not retarded! They’re cute!

Kay: Yeah. Doesn’t it look kinda like a gangster version of Prinplup?

Maya: Heh, that’s the best part.

Phoenix: Never mind that a penguin is testifying on the stand, huh?

Maya, Kay: Penguin Pokémon.

Phoenix: It’s still a penguin, and Pokémon don’t usually speak English.

Quote:
bel was like " It was about 11:00 AM when I saw the murder.
Batman had pulled out a gun and shot Phoenix twice. That is all, thank you."

Kay: Objection! Batman wouldn’t kill anyone! Don’t you know he has a “no kill” rule!?

Speakers: He didn’t used to…

Kay: Those days are over. He’s a changed man.

Speakers: But what about the All-Star issues?

Kay: Real fans don’t talk about them.

Maya: Wow, Kay, I didn’t know you were a comic book fan.

Kay: Heh, I spread my interests around sometimes. It sure comes in handy in this place!

Maya: Maybe one of these days we should get a Kay signal to call you…

Kay: Like on a headlight? Awesome!

Speakers: No. We are not wasting our precious revenue on that. Besides, you pop in whenever you want!

Kay: Except your tight security doesn’t even let me hang out on the rooftops anymore…

Speakers: You aren’t supposed to be there anyway. The helipad is for private use only.

All: !?

Phoenix: (Just how much are they earning from this gig!?)

Quote:
now phenix crossexaimned him. HOLD OBJECTIONS!

Maya: “Hold objections”?

Franziska: …Well, if the defense has no objections, I suppose we can proceed right to the verdict-

Phoenix: Objection!

Franziska: W-what? I was making a joke! Why are you getting so serious all of a sudden!?

Phoenix: Well, not exactly serious, but there is a contradiction in the testimony…

Franziska: …And that would be?

Phoenix: The previous chapter never mentioned a shot. How did he know the defendant had a gun?

All: …

Speakers: Are you seriously using the fic, fraught with discontinuity, as your evidence?

Phoenix: Where else should I get the evidence from? Real life? I don’t think fics work like that, Management.

Franziska: If you’re going to complain about that, then how about the obvious one where you were supposed to have been murdered!?

Kay: Duplication powers.

Franziska: …You can’t be serious.

Maya: Didn’t he have a different name, actually?

Phoenix: All these “Phoenixes” have different names. I suppose it’s to differentiate them all.

Maya: Hmm, I guess so, but I sure wish they had different names that were easier to say.

Quote:
batman couldnt have killed me becauz i am here! bel's pants fell off as he flew into a fit of tage. "NOOOOOOO! My plan is foiled!"

Maya: He had a plan?

Kay: So he was the real murderer all along! That’s how he knew there was a gun!

Maya: Too bad for him, another Nick showed up to catch him! This is why Pokémon should never have guns.

Franziska: For the last time, there was no murder! And don’t tell me “duplication powers”!

Phoenix: How about alternate universes, then?

Franziska: What?

Phoenix: Thanks to the shenanigans of this supposed “God of Universes”, characters from alternate universes are showing up like it’s nothing. It’s not surprising a few of my alternates showed as well.

Franziska: …Is that really your reasoning for this utter mess?

Phoenix: It actually makes sense in context.

Franziska: It’s foolish foolery that wouldn’t fool even fools more foolish than you!

Phoenix: Then, would you like to provide an explanation?

Franziska: …It’s simple. All the machinations that have transpired are within a sequence of dreams.

Phoenix: Aw, come on. I came up with that firs- gah!

Franziska: Then, stick with it, for the sake of reason!

Quote:
pgenxxxi said " the pabatmaperson who commited the crime! is you! jsutice alibis dreams hopes! pay for crime! TAKE THAT!"

Maya: Wow, the name of this AU-Nick keeps changing until it’s pretty much unrecognizable.

Kay: Must be a new guy.

Maya: Must be.

Phoenix: So, who’s the “pabatma” person?

Maya: Um… maybe another AU-Nick?

Phoenix: …W-wait, wait. Are you saying all my AUs are involved in some sort of infighting?

Kay: Oh, wow! It actually makes sense, if you think about it.

Phoenix: How?

Kay: Only the best of the phony Phoenixes could claim the title of “Ace Love Man”, and so they’re all fighting for the one true Wright!

Maya: *claps* Impressive, Kay.

Kay: Thanks, Maya!

Franziska: …I think I feel a migraine coming on.

Phoenix: (Whatever keeps that whip at bay…) Ow! What!?

Franziska: No smirking at the sick!

Phoenix: …Yes, ma’am.

Quote:
bel had died when all of a sudden... Don Flamenco has arrived!

Kay: The Spanish guy from Punch Out! Heh, figures he’d show up to this strange love-fest.

Maya: “Done chasing his Carmen, who would never return his love, he set off on his own to find a new lover who would respect him for him and a new opponent in the ring!”

Kay: Now that’s some storytelling! *claps*

Maya: Thank you, thank you…

Phoenix: (Knowing where this fic is going, my bet’s going to fic-me…)

Quote:
Don Flamenco got pheunx stripped of all his clothes when... EDGEYPOO had shot donnie in the face! Edgeypoo was liek "STAY OFF MY MAN, BITCH!"

Kay: Oh, ouch…

Maya: That’s totally unfair! Where did he get a gun?

Phoenix: The murder weapon?

Franziska: …I suppose it does make some level of sense for the prosecution to have confiscated it.

Maya: But you never bring a gun to a boxing match!

Phoenix: Would you have preferred that fic-Edgeworth pounce on him, fists flailing?

Maya, Kay: Uh, yeah!

Phoenix: (I should have known…)

Kay: That’d be amazing! Mr. Edgeworth has a nice right hook, you know.

Maya: Really? Did he ever punch someone?

Kay: Well… Gummy. Poor guy.

Maya: …Somehow, I’m not surprised.

Quote:
and then mia showed up adn was like "PEHENEIEX how could u!" and then they made out and a rainbow showed up and bel died and the judge fell off a cliff when all of a sudden...

Phoenix: Whoa, whoa, whoa… Where the heck was the judge all this time!?

Franziska: That explains why he hadn’t called for order in the court.

Kay: Poor ol’ Judge. He probably couldn’t take the nonsense anymore.

Maya: Not to be morbid, but maybe that was why he fell off a cliff…

Phoenix: …I would rather think he fell off because he was playing too close to one.

Franziska: For shame, Phoenix Wright! What kind of an image do you have of that old fogey!?

Phoenix: (Says you, Ms. von Hypocrite.)

Quote:
Dahlia had been channeled by Akip, the legendary spirit medium who is apart of the Mander spirit clan!

Maya: Akip? Mander? Wow, a new spirit channeling clan!

Kay: Somehow, I’m getting Pokémon vibes from those names… is it just me?

Maya: …Way to take the wind out of my sails.

Kay: Sorry. After whatever happened to Bel, I couldn’t help but expect more Pokémon.

Phoenix: (…Better yet, why is it always Dahlia who has to show up and ruin it… even more?)

Quote:
dollie-sama was like "yo feenies... i want you INSIDE ME" and then dahlia shot mia and pheenix was arrest. and then rainbows happened.

Phoenix: …Well, I guess our AU theory actually works.

Maya: Except they still got the wrong Phoenix.

Kay: They all look the same anyway.

Franziska: Well, if the rainbows give any indication, that’s the end of all… that.

Phoenix: Thank goodness for rainbows.

Maya: That reminds me, Nick! Your bucket has the Skittles!

Phoenix: Oh, you want some?

Maya: Thanks! You can have some too.

Phoenix: Ah, thanks, Maya… but maybe later. (After my limbs stop hurting…)


[The lights have returned, everyone.]

Franziska: And good riddance! It’s always the worst fics that await me these days…

Phoenix: To be fair, you do complain the most about presentation.

Franziska: You should know, Phoenix Wright! Presentation is crucial to any piece of work, no matter in our professional field or a basic English writing class!

Phoenix: Yeah… but these fics would belong to neither.

Franziska: That’s beside the point. I’m telling you that you need to clean up your act!

Phoenix: In the Sporking Theater? (My act is just fine, thank you…)

Franziska: While you’ve brought it up, yes, that too. Honestly, just who laughs at your tasteless humor?

Phoenix: (You’re not all that fun either, Whippingberg…)

Maya: Nick is pretty funny, actually, but only when he doesn’t mean to be.

Kay: Reminds me of Mr. Edgeworth.

Maya: Him too, definitely.

[As the sporkers take their leave exchanging candy and insults on the same veins, it brings this session to a close. Thank you for your time and have a pleasant day.]

Speakers: …But seriously, why don’t we have self-feeding robots? That’s the basics of “How to Be Evil 101”! Time to order a new shipment…
Help! My parents are Phoenix Wright & Miles Edgeworth! Er, I mean they're irresponsible drunks!

Click here for the Gyakuten Saiban vs Ace Attorney Translation Project Blog!
Various official AA stuff translations currently in the works.

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Pomeranian with rabies.. And a troll swatter?
So... You have rabies now?
I vote we kick Rubia from the management.


Honestly, this might be my favourite Sporking yet. The fic's just so ridiculous.
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Well.
That was... something.

I wonder how many different permutations of Phoenix there are out in the ficverse? And I wonder how many of them are specifically named "Pheonix"...
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Thousands.
And most of them Pheenix, Feenix and Pheonix I bet.
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AireyVerkhovensky wrote:
Well.
That was... something.

I wonder how many different permutations of Phoenix there are out in the ficverse? And I wonder how many of them are specifically named "Pheonix"...

You almost sound disappointed. XD

Technically, we could find an approximate answer if we take 7 choose 5 permu's (leaving the "Ph" in tact), which would be around 120 possible ones. Adding it to the permu's with "F" instead, it comes to 240... and then there are those that don't fall into these categories, which boosts our number to around 5000 or so. Maybe.
Help! My parents are Phoenix Wright & Miles Edgeworth! Er, I mean they're irresponsible drunks!

Click here for the Gyakuten Saiban vs Ace Attorney Translation Project Blog!
Various official AA stuff translations currently in the works.

Also, click here for the current archive of fanfiction or here for the backup archive. Click here for the blog that updates it.
Includes translations of misc. fan works related or not to AA.
Also, a very popular fanfic ask meme.
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Rubia Ryu the Royal wrote:
AireyVerkhovensky wrote:
Well.
That was... something.

I wonder how many different permutations of Phoenix there are out in the ficverse? And I wonder how many of them are specifically named "Pheonix"...

You almost sound disappointed. XD

Technically, we could find an approximate answer if we take 7 choose 5 permu's (leaving the "Ph" in tact), which would be around 120 possible ones. Adding it to the permu's with "F" instead, it comes to 240... and then there are those that don't fall into these categories, which boosts our number to around 5000 or so. Maybe.

Nah, it was a great sporking, but man was that fic out there!

I think my favorite permutation of Phoenix is pgenxxxi.
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That fic was a work of art.
Don't you say otherwise.
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AireyVerkhovensky wrote:
Nah, it was a great sporking, but man was that fic out there!

I think my favorite permutation of Phoenix is pgenxxxi.

Funny how the only letters we need to recognize his name is "P", "e" or "i", and "x". We might as well call him Pix(iv) and everyone would still know who we're talking about. (*´◡`)
Help! My parents are Phoenix Wright & Miles Edgeworth! Er, I mean they're irresponsible drunks!

Click here for the Gyakuten Saiban vs Ace Attorney Translation Project Blog!
Various official AA stuff translations currently in the works.

Also, click here for the current archive of fanfiction or here for the backup archive. Click here for the blog that updates it.
Includes translations of misc. fan works related or not to AA.
Also, a very popular fanfic ask meme.
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Rubia Ryu the Royal wrote:
AireyVerkhovensky wrote:
Nah, it was a great sporking, but man was that fic out there!

I think my favorite permutation of Phoenix is pgenxxxi.

Funny how the only letters we need to recognize his name is "P", "e" or "i", and "x". We might as well call him Pix(iv) and everyone would still know who we're talking about. (*´◡`)

...now I want to write a fic where I just refer to Phoenix as Pixiv for the whole thing. Without ever acknowledging that it's incorrect.
Alternately: a Java program that generates random permutations of Phoenix, with the only guidelines being that it needs to be seven letters, starts with a "P", and has an "x" somewhere in it.
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Airey, I demand you make that fic.
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AireyVerkhovensky wrote:
Rubia Ryu the Royal wrote:
Funny how the only letters we need to recognize his name is "P", "e" or "i", and "x". We might as well call him Pix(iv) and everyone would still know who we're talking about. (*´◡`)

...now I want to write a fic where I just refer to Phoenix as Pixiv for the whole thing. Without ever acknowledging that it's incorrect.
Alternately: a Java program that generates random permutations of Phoenix, with the only guidelines being that it needs to be seven letters, starts with a "P", and has an "x" somewhere in it.

Is that a challenge? (∗´꒳`) Not that I'm so great with Java, but it is a pretty simple program to write pseudocode for it. May make for interesting practice some time...
Help! My parents are Phoenix Wright & Miles Edgeworth! Er, I mean they're irresponsible drunks!

Click here for the Gyakuten Saiban vs Ace Attorney Translation Project Blog!
Various official AA stuff translations currently in the works.

Also, click here for the current archive of fanfiction or here for the backup archive. Click here for the blog that updates it.
Includes translations of misc. fan works related or not to AA.
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Rubia Ryu the Royal wrote:
AireyVerkhovensky wrote:
Rubia Ryu the Royal wrote:
Funny how the only letters we need to recognize his name is "P", "e" or "i", and "x". We might as well call him Pix(iv) and everyone would still know who we're talking about. (*´◡`)

...now I want to write a fic where I just refer to Phoenix as Pixiv for the whole thing. Without ever acknowledging that it's incorrect.
Alternately: a Java program that generates random permutations of Phoenix, with the only guidelines being that it needs to be seven letters, starts with a "P", and has an "x" somewhere in it.

Is that a challenge? (∗´꒳`) Not that I'm so great with Java, but it is a pretty simple program to write pseudocode for it. May make for interesting practice some time...

I'm not so great with Java either, but yeah, it doesn't sound that hard. Too bad I still don't have my programs from school, because I'm pretty sure I wrote something very similar last year.
Oliver wrote:
Airey, I demand you make that fic.

Can I just take one of my pre-existing fics and find+replace Phoenix's name with whatever permutation?
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Unless it's a fic about Phoenix browsing through Pixiv for some reason...
Help! My parents are Phoenix Wright & Miles Edgeworth! Er, I mean they're irresponsible drunks!

Click here for the Gyakuten Saiban vs Ace Attorney Translation Project Blog!
Various official AA stuff translations currently in the works.

Also, click here for the current archive of fanfiction or here for the backup archive. Click here for the blog that updates it.
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Also, a very popular fanfic ask meme.
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AireyVerkhovensky wrote:
Oliver wrote:
Airey, I demand you make that fic.

Can I just take one of my pre-existing fics and find+replace Phoenix's name with whatever permutation?

I honestly don't care, I just want to see the Adventures of Pix
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Rubia Ryu the Royal wrote:
Unless it's a fic about Phoenix browsing through Pixiv for some reason...

Spoiler: Pixiv browses Pixiv
November 2, 9:46 PM, Wright and Co. Law Offices

If there was one thing Pixiv Wright liked to do for fun, it was browse Pixiv. Those Japanese artists were just so dang good! He didn't understand how got to be like that. After all, 99% of the stuff on deviantART was junk, but Pixiv... just about everything on there was a masterpiece!

One you got past the yaoi anatomy, that is.

Anyway, Pixiv was casually scrolling through Pixiv's 逆転裁判 tag when another tag caught his eye: みつなる.

"Hmm," Pixiv said out loud, "I wonder what that is." He clicked on it.

Pixiv stared at the computer. The computer stared back at him. Pixiv leaned closer and narrowed his eyes. The computer did not do the same, since it was not that one G4 iMac commercial from 2002.

"What the heck," Pixiv said, "Is that Edgeworth?" He clicked on a random picture.

Image

"WHAT THE HECK," Pixiv said out loud. "That's me! And that's Edgeworth!"

"Nick, shut up," Maya yelled from elsewhere in the office/apartment/whatever it was.

"But it's Edgeworth," Pixiv muttered, then continued scrolling through the Pixiv piece. He stopped somewhere around page four, when Pixiv-Edgeworth started pawing around under Pixiv-Pixiv's shirt.

Pixiv sighed prolongedly. "What did I do to deserve this?" he asked Pixiv.

But Pixiv didn't answer him. So Pixiv sighed and went back to the 逆転裁判 tag.

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I... Huh?
But... Huh?
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Incidentally, I was surprised at how small the みつなる tag actually is.
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Thank ye, Airey. It is the best thing I have read in a while... though what I've been reading lately have mainly been badfics. XP Btw, that tag you clicked was Mitsunaru. Since Narumitsu is the general term that encompasses any interaction between the two, it's definitely more popular.
Help! My parents are Phoenix Wright & Miles Edgeworth! Er, I mean they're irresponsible drunks!

Click here for the Gyakuten Saiban vs Ace Attorney Translation Project Blog!
Various official AA stuff translations currently in the works.

Also, click here for the current archive of fanfiction or here for the backup archive. Click here for the blog that updates it.
Includes translations of misc. fan works related or not to AA.
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Thaaaaat explains it. I thought it was something like that.
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