You're too much like my cousin. Full of excuses. I can't even deal right now. I tried. Do whatever you want then.

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Sure doesn't seem that way. I can't recall a single incidence of you saying "Alright...if you're sure I'll try that", from as far as I can remember you've always just said "That doesn't work" from the get go. Granted maybe you have actually just done it all but a little evidence other than "That doesn't work" would be nice. Though have you ever tried looking up a support website? I'm sure you aren't the only broken heart out there and there's almost certainly helplines and forums for depression.

In any case you missed or disregarded the important bit. Where I said that you aren't alone and that we support you. You've claimed no one cares and no one helps you and yet we've all offered you advice.

Even if the advice isn't effective the INTENT is there, people are trying to help you and support you with your problem when they could have said nothing.

So it's not fair for you to get angry just because no one replied to your last rant, advice is a gift not a guarantee or an obligation. If you get some, great if not don't rant and accuse everyone of not caring and ignoring you.

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"Insanity - doing the same thing over and over again, expecting different results." - Albert Einstein

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You're not seriously suggesting a person like him, who is so downtrodden and sad, would be good company for children, elders or homeless people, right?



Of course you have every right to feel this way, but stop fucking telling us every few da-... *sigh* Mustn't get too emotional about this again.



So, what... had she strung you along for a few weeks, dropping increasingly-less-subtle hints about breaking up with you before breaking up with you wouldn't have been so bad? Call me a coldhearted bitch for this, but that's what it sounds like.



My heart bleeds for your mother and her frail health and all, but come on. You're fucking 16, right? How tight a leash is she gonna keep on you? Why not be all Rebel Teen and go somewhere yourself, you have a train ticket, right? (Unless train tickets work vastly different from Germany, then this might be more complicated)



That can be said about learning any language that is not necessary for someone's job or day-to-day life. So really, your father has no freaking basis to say this on.



No. You get mad at us for "ignoring" your posts. You get mad at us for trying to talk to you. No matter what we do, you always get mad at us. You say dealing with your Ex is like playing Russian Roulette where you tend to lose? Trying to do anything with you is like Russian Roulette will all bullet chambers filled and it's an automatically firing pistol.

Now for my own Vent.
You know, I like the Nostalgia Critic, he has had some funny review videos and even still has some that are funny. But by fucking God, his review of The Shining's TV Mini Series is terrible. Okay, so he's satyrizing the Kubrick version with his in-between sketches, fine and all. But his complaint about the TV Series are fucking stupid. Yeah nothing happens, but you know why? Cause King tried to make it as close to the book as possible. Yes, that's a problem since King's WRITING STYLE is the scary thing. His writing style is very slow, very creepy and it slowly fills your mind with a scare. It's INCREDIBLY difficult to bring that style to movie or TV, since both are visual media while a book is... well, not.
Did the Critic even READ the damn book? No. All he says is "This isn't scary! DO SOMETHING!" like he expects it to be just like the Kubrick movie. Which, by the way, BARELY seems to have anything to do with the original book, I don't blame King for hating that movie. He just turned it into any standard horror/scare-the-shit-out-of-you movie. The original book is creepy. It's scary. Definitely not one to read during Winter.

C-A

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I'll let you in on a secret.

Not every psychologist is qualified to hold their title.

If your psychologist flat out tells you "you can't do anything to improve your situation" and just leaves it at that, it's time to find a new psychologist.

You can't control what other people do, you can only control your reactions to what they do.

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I agree with the previous poster, your therapist sounds terrible, telling you that you can't do anything and allowing you to be complacent by blaming others.

Also maybe try being less aggressive? I dunno, if you're like this with people in real life, or consider everyone to be "preppy snobs", of course you're not gonna make any friends. Give people the benefit of the doubt

Edit: this is coming from someone who can barely even look his best friends in the eye because of shyness. If I can make friends you can dude, even if it's just casual buddies you share like one interest with.

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Fuck you and saying that I'm making excuses. You don't know what I go through every day. I already told you that I've tried every option that's been offered here. It isn't my fault that they don't work. It's my environment around me that's the problem. You're the one who's being the most cold and apathetic. I don't need to here this shit from people like you.



Yes, because as a 16 year old, I REALLY want to talk with children who are 5-10. Normally I say age is arbitrary, but not in this case. I can talk to older people just fine. I'm not spending my time with kids. Honestly, I can't stand them to tell you the truth.




I NEVER said everyone is an idiot. I said that they were shallow and snobbish. That's a big difference. My thinking isn't any higher or lower than there's. It's just different. And since it's different, I can't connect to anyone.



I do talk to some teachers. But they're not friends, they're staff of the school. There's only so much they can do and there's very little time during the school day.



Because where I live is small, and you see the same people. Besides, I've joined tons of clubs before. I never meet anyone different, and just because I have one or two shared interests, doesn't mean that they view me as friends.



I talk to people on the Internet, but they live thousands of miles away. That's no substitute for human companionship in my life. And as I've said a hundred times, I can't leave where I'm living so I can't meet new people.

I've already told you that I'm broken up over this, because I don't have anything else to live for in my life. If I had friends or people in my life that cared, I wouldn't be this way.



You can choose to believe me or not. That isn't my problem. And in the majority of the cases I've told you WHY that particular piece of advice doesn't work. No, I have my psychologist for those things.



And I'm grateful assuming that the intent is there. But you also have to remember that in my real life, the life that I live every day and go through, none of you are part of that. It's in my own life where I'm alone and no one cares. Talking to people on the Internet is fine, I guess. But to me, I have to have companionship that I can actually experience.



Fuck you. I don't need that kind of shitty advice by accusing me of insanity. I'm not intentionally doing the "same thing over and over again." I'm experiencing it. Every day is the same for me, and I can't change it. No matter what I do.



Don't make assumptions. I can interact with these kinds of people when it's need. It's not hard to put on a face.



Why do you think I'm saying this every day? Because these problems affect me EVERY DAY.



You are a coldhearted bitch with this. I asked her many times if she was happy with me and if she wanted to still be in a relationship. If it was that bad, she would have told me no. We were together for two and a half months. She never complained about anything, and her telling me this literally came out of nowhere.



Yes, I know that. It's fucking pathetic that I have these restrictions and that I can't go where I want. But that's how it is. She'd kill me if I went places I wasn't allowed to go. As much as I hate it, she is my mother and me being a minor, I have to follow her rules.



I agree with that too. There's a lot of things that he has no basis to say either, since the only thing he's good at is violin and tennis. He never went through schooling and he doesn't understand how the American system works.



Of course I'll get angry when people ignore me. Because I have enough of that in my real life. And I only get truly mad when people accuse me of things that are simply not true or when they make baseless assumptions on me. And as mentioned before, I get irritated when people repeat the same tired advice over and over again



No, he's very qualified.
http://therapists.psychologytoday.com/r ... ania_46522

He's being realistic, guys. There really isn't anything I can do to improve my situation. I go to his office to talk to someone. It's free for me anyways, so I'm not getting scammed or anything.



I'm only aggressive because of how I've been treated my whole life. Trust me, when I'm with people, I know how to interact with them. But that's when I realize their true personalities and how shallow they are. Even those that seem to be decent turn out to be just as bad. This is from experience with people whom I thought were my "friends." They ended up moving on from me or focusing on other people.

Face it, there's only so much advice that can be given. Once those have been exhausted, we have no clue what to do anymore, either. And even then, what are we supposed to do when you don't want to be ignored, but also don't want advice already given? Just agree with you and say "Yeah your life sucks"? I kinda have the feeling you'd just get mad about that, too, since it'd be like one more reminder.

C-A

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Than what would you have me do? I'm always open to advice, but I'm really convinced that nothing new can be offered. My psychologist tells me, and I agree with him on this, that I'm destined for bigger things outside where I live. But I'm very likely going to stay this way as long as I'm here in my current situation.

While that may be true, complaining about it really doesn't help anything. Even more so with the kind of situation you've described.
Like someone else suggested (forget who), if you want to express how you're feeling, maybe consider 'venting' it in the form of a creative outlet, such as art or poetry.

I honestly don't feel like discussing any of the other things, because I'm pretty sure anything I say will be brushed aside, or taken out of context and twisted in a way to make me seem like a bad guy - not unlike a certain 'advice column' you've mentioned before.

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You don't have a right to get mad when people don't reply though. As I said before it doesn't mean they are ignoring you, they might not have seen it or they might have concluded that they can't offer advice that would help you and so have nothing to say. Especially here...in this forum it's intended just for venting, not for advice or discussion as is stated in the rules. You have no right to rage at people who have done nothing to you.



Nope.

If you recognise you have a problem you have the capacity to change it and control it. "I'm aggressive because of other people" is not a valid excuse because you are consciously aware of it and are capable of making a change. It's a simple decision not to treat others nastily, if folks have treated you horribly that's a shame but it doesn't justify you being aggressive to others. Live the way you want the world to be, not how others want the world to be.



Go to a specified forum for depression and share your issues there. Do NOT rage at people here just because they can't offer you advice.

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Maybe you should talk to your therapist about the fact that you're still traumatised over a two and a half month relationship. It's not healthy at all to put all your hopes and requirements for happiness onto a person like that, and honestly two and a half months is a pretty long time for a high school relationship. What are you gonna do when an actual long-term relationship breaks down? You have to be able to function well as a single person before being in a healthy relationship.

Also, do you seriously think you're the only one who's dealt with two-faced people? I can pretty much guarantee (and I'm sure others'll back me up on this) that all of us in this thread have been betrayed by someone we considered a friend. That's not a reason to be aggressive to everyone. Do you go off on rants about religion and feminism in real life? Because that's also gonna push people away.

Honestly I don't know what to say other than chill out and just play video games with people or something. I'm sure there's a nerdier social clique at your high school.

I'm kind of baffled at the idea that a trained professional would tell you that it's totally okay to just blame others for your problems. How are other people at fault for you not being able to get over a short-term relationship?

Edit: When I was your age I also thought I was hot shit because I had stellar grades, and I thought that I was the only non-shallow person surrounded by preppies, etc. The realisation that that was complete bullshit was pretty vital in making me a decent person. No one is a special snowflake.

Edit 2: Also I should point out that every therapist is different, and a qualification just means they're licensed to practise. A certain therapist may not be able to provide the right insight to help you fix your problems and lots of people go through multiple therapists before finding the one who helps them progress.

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And keeping everything bottled up is even worse. I don't write poetry and I don't do art either. I've written enough depressing things to last a lifetime.

Then do or don't. That advice column is something that isn't going down. Here, at least you can explain yourself better and fully.



Goddammit, of course I recognize my problems. I can't change them with where I am now. I try my best to be a decent and caring person. But over here, I only get exploited and stepped on. This happens every single time. All my life, people have treated me horribly or shown completely apathy towards me. I try my best, but it's never good enough for anyone.

What you see here is me expressing my anger over this and more issues.



If you people and even a trained professional in these kinds of problems can't even help me, there's no hope for me. I've even talked to another psychologist that I know online, and he's said the same things about how my life will never be better as long as I'm here where I live.



That's practically all we talk about and it's the same thing. That it wasn't my fault and that I have every right to be this way. Of course I know that this isn't healthy. I know that all too well. But I put all my hopes for happiness into her, because she was the only good thing in my life. Just as I was building my self-esteem and confidence, it was shattered by her in one blow. As for a long-term relationship, that would only happen assuming that the person actually loves and cares for me.



Nope. But that's been practically every single person I've ever met here. I'm telling you, where I live is terrible. And no, I don't. Only when people ask me for my opinion or in class discussions. They don't care really.



There is. But even they don't enjoy the same things with me. I've tried to make friends with them, and they don't care either. My girlfriend was the only person who had the same interests, and she left me. There isn't anyone else here.



How am I wrong in blaming them, when they are most definitely the cause of my problems? I'm telling you again, I've TRIED. I've done so much to be the best person possible, but it never works.

I would have gotten over this way more easily if there were actually people in my life who cared. But there isn't. Besides my psychologist, there hasn't been a single person who's offered or shown support to me.



Don't be ridiculous. I never said anything about being smarter or dumber than anyone else. I said that my thinking process was DIFFERENT. That's all. I'm no one special. I just think differently. But I do consider myself to be a reasonably intelligent person, and in the majority of cases, I am uninterested in whatever lame mainstream bullshit teenagers these days are into.

And for the record, my grades aren't anything to brag about. They're not terrible, but they're not the best either.

You do know there's a difference between being a decent person and being a complete doormat...

Also, my vent here, I'm sneezing up a freaking storm here. Why? I haven't encountered anything dusty lately, I'm not cold - in fact I'm pleasantly cool compared to being hot over the course of the day, I'm not sick... why am I sneezing so fucking much!?

C-A

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Somehow I end up being both.

Wrong, for this specific matter of your aggression. You recognise you are being aggressive so just stop being aggressive. No one is putting a knife to your back and saying "Be a dick" to other people.

Don't sidetrack this onto your other problems and the rest of of your life. This is about you being aggressive to people who've done nothing to you. Good people who tried to help you.

You can control yourself at least, next time you feel compelled to lash out at someone just don't You aren't going to accomplish anything by being angry at someone, much worse if you redirect it onto someone who completely doesn't deserve it.



Huh...this sounds a lot like you rejecting advice out-of-hand without trying it, but you always give advice a fair shot right?

Support groups can provide a good level of understanding too you know? A lot of us might have had hard times in our life but like you say no one understands how bad things are for you, why not seek out other people who are suffering and seek support from them. Perhaps they have found something that works for them to improve their situation (and would be in a better position to advise you being in similar circumstances).

It's worth a shot, you can hide behind a professional saying "Not much we can do" or you can try and do something yourself. It's not like he's going to tell you off at your next session for trying to improve your life.

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Does he tell you that it's weird that you can't get over it two months later? Because it is and could be a sign of deeper problems that a counselor isn't qualified to deal with. *takes off armchair psychologist hat, looks down in shame*


I went to high school in one of the richest areas in the South of France, to a school which was essentially private while still being state-run. I know what that kind of place is like. There are still awesome people there, and tarring everyone with the same brush isn't gonna help.


Then show interest in what they enjoy and maybe they'll do the same back. Hell, a great way to make friends (at least for me) is to just let people talk about what they're interested in, ask them questions, and over time conversation drifts onto other stuff and before you know it you've got a new buddy


Because it allows you to say "I can't fix my problems, I'm fine and the only problem is that everyone sucks" which can be an unhealthy way of thinking.
You posted in another thread saying you offered your ex a ride home. That isn't what someone trying to get over a relationship should be doing.


This is exactly what I meant. Don't call stuff other people like bullshit, it comes across as aggressive and snobbish. It's also a massive generalisation.

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Sometimes I really wonder if this kind of attitude and trust issue you will do well in other places like Canada or Japan as you refer so much (I know Alberta is really much like USA and Quebec is rough on right thoughts people). If you thinks yes, I would like to know why. People are the same everywhere, the only thing that change is their values, their interest and their personality. If they get treated a certain way most of them will react the same way.

I think you need more a social worker than a psychologist.

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Anger is a natural response to what I'm going through. I have every right to be angry right now because of how I've been treated.

I've told you that I'm only aggressive because the same advise gets repeated over and over again by the same people. How many times do I have to repeat myself on this?



How does that sound like rejecting advice without trying it? And like I've already said, I have.



The majority of people get through these things because they have friends or people in their life to help them. I'm one of the loneliest people you'd ever meet. Besides, they don't offer these groups where I live and anywhere else would be too far away.



Every single person, professional or not, has told me the same thing that there's nothing I can do. Even my own mother. Again, it's called being realistic.



He's a psychologist, not a counselor, and he tells me that it's perfectly normal. Because tons of people can be hurt by these things for far longer than two months. People have gone years being like this, and I'm afraid that I'll probably follow in those footsteps.



I haven't met any "awesome people." The ones that I think are fine, turn out to be just as bad. Again, I've tried my best with the people here, but they don't make any effort in return.



The thing is that they don't show interest in anything I have to say. That's even when I try to ask about their interests. It doesn't work that way with the people here.



It's called being nice, because it was raining outside and I didn't want her walking home in it. AND AGAIN, IT'S MY ENVIRONMENT THAT'S THE PROBLEM. EVERY SINGLE PERSON that I've talked to has told me the same thing. This isn't just me coming up with these things. Psychologists, teachers, my own mother. These are adults who are all telling me the same thing. Notice a pattern yet?



What, because I'm not interested in trends? Because I actually am a cultured person that doesn't want to waste my time with garbage? Listen, I'm open to anything. But the moment I see that something's not worth my time, I will not bother with it. That's when I declare it bullshit in my eyes. But hey, it's just my opinion. Take it or leave it.



Not where I am. This is a social bubble cut off from everything else. I've talked to people outside of here, and it's night and day. They're completely different. So I refuse to believe that all people are the same. It's only here where I don't fit in. I'm not destined to be here.

At least one more time it seems because I can cite a time you weren't angry due to repeated advice. Indeed it's the reason why I am so bothered about this, I've said so several times.

The first time I got involved was when you lashed out at everyone for "ignoring" your first post. We explained we didn't know what to say that would help you and so opted to say nothing. You got angry due to a lack of advice and attention.

Also sure Anger is a natural response to people who have hurt you, you should not direct it at innocents.
Do we deserve to receive your anger because we've tried at length to help you and offer advice and support? You once said you were grateful to those of us that did and yet when you lash out because we said nothing on the matter (because as you've said it'd be repeated advice) you leave us helpless. We aren't here to be your verbal punching bag.



Seemed pretty clear to me:


You dismiss the idea of support groups on the argument that a trained professional and us (though we really don't count for much) have failed to help you.

You haven't tried it. It's clear as day.



I didn't say necessarily a local group, though depression is so widespread I wouldn't be surprised if there was a group nearby and you hadn't found it. I suggested an online forum. You come to us for support often enough, why not try a group of people who actually understand that dark pit you describe currently. Let them be the friends and people in your life to help you get through this.



Well....we haven't. Are we not people?
We've suggested numerous things and I'm still lacking compelling evidence you have tried our suggestions. Your aren't being realistic, you are being defeatist and placing your fate in the hands of other people telling you it's hopeless. It might be you think that their advice justifies you accepting your situation but no one knows you better than you Tophat, don't let their verdict professional or not keep you bound in misery doing nothing.

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The very page you linked us to says he has an MA in Counseling, hence a counselor, not a psychologist (who would need a PhD or a PsycD).
Err but no, while it's very much normal for a long term relationship to cause issues like this, your relationship lasted two and a half months. Very much a short term thing. The fact you can't get over it suggests that you might have issues to work on too. If you're afraid, then that gives you even more reason to be introspective, man

Okay, you've made your point, you don't like the people you live near. Whilst I find it incredibly hard to believe that literally everyone you come into contact with is awful, I'll give you the benefit of the doubt. I still don't think that's in any way an excuse for being aggressive or giving up. There's always someone you can meet, whether it be online or in real life. Just joking around with someone can be the start of a friendship, do you like humour?


You've broken up, this is not a thing you should care about, you are not responsible for her well-being. While it is indeed a friendly thing to suggest, it's not appropriate or helpful to someone you're trying to get over romantic feelings for. Also if an ex who I knew was taking it badly offered me a car ride I would freak the hell out.


No, because instead of saying you don't like it (qualification of your relationship to an object) you just call it lame mainstream bullshit (direct qualification of the thing). Also using the word mainstream in a pejorative way is like Snob 101. You don't have to like stuff, just don't call it bullshit if other people do.

I really don't know what you want dude. For us to just say "oh my you have it so bad, none of our petty problems could ever compare to the horrors that have befallen TopHatProfessor1014"? I don't think you do. So legit question, what are you hoping to achieve?

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Last edited by Haawke on Fri Jun 13, 2014 12:25 am, edited 1 time in total.

I'm gonna have to ask the same thing I ask every time I encounter that type of idea in a manga... what's so terrible about walking home in rain? Unless the person is somehow highly allergic to water or literally made of sugar that'll melt when wet, I fail to see the problem...

C-A

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Realistic? I think you are more cynic TopHat. Shame that everybody in your hometown is cynic (or just everybody in the world). Dude do you live on a farm in a village of a 150 people?

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Okay would you stop bitching and moaning? We have tried to help you deal with this bullshit for faaaaaaaaaaar too long. You keep denying our advices. You even ignore our advices. You keep saying you have to deal with this bullshit every fucking day. EVERYBODY HAS PROBLEMS THAT AFFECT THEM EVERY GOD DAMN MOTHER FUCKING DAY! But WE don't let those fucking problems ruin our fucking life.


My best advice for you is to find something to get rid of your fucking problems. FIND A DIFFERENT GIRL.. MOVE THE FUCK ON.

And I don't wanna hear "You don't understand she's the most important girl to me." Or shit like that. So she dumped your ass, so you dumped her ass so both dumped each other ass. When shit hits the fan bad things happens. And currently you keep letting shit hitting the fan beause you keep bitching and moaning bout how your life is so fucked up you bitch about it. You got two fucking legs get the fuck up and move to a brighter future where you are fucking happy.


My fucking god, it's bad enough I had a hand that was in pain from the grill fire blowing up in the face from yesterday and other shit I got to deal with like my haircut and shaving, BOTH which hasn't been done because of problems at home.

I didn't "lash" out, I said that it seemed that no one wanted to get involved. And frankly, I'll get angry at anyone who ignores me. Because I get that all the time in my own life.



I can't try, what isn't offered here.



They don't offer those things here, only individual sessions. And I've talked to people outside this forum, with some people on Twitter. They also say that there's not much I can do or similar advice that doesn't help me.



The difference is that people I've talked to actually know me in person. None of you here do. And bear in mind that I'm being "defeatist" for the time being. I have hope for college and beyond that. Not where I am now.

If you don't want to believe me, fine. I'm telling you that I've tried everything that I could.



Then counselor. Sorry, but I've been told that he's a psychologist a lot. I guess it's a common mistake. People tend to get psychologist and psychiatrist confused too.

I'm like this because I was lonely and miserable to begin with before I met her. And of course I have issues. That's completely self-evident. Of course I'm going to be this way if I don't have anything else.



I talk to people online. Hell, I'm talking to Kaiwatt now on Skype. Too bad she lives thousands of miles away in France. Same with Mirri-chan before she left me. She lived in England. But to me, I need companionship in my actual life right here right now. That simply isn't here. I joke around a ton. I'm the king of off-color jokes too, though I only use those when appropriate of course. Again, that doesn't start anything.



Her life is hell though. Even worse than mine. But I agree with you that it shouldn't be my problem. But I can't help it. I'm too soft-hearted and I care too much. This isn't just with her. I have this problem with the majority of people, which is why I'm so easily exploited.



"Mainstream" refers to trends that are consumed by the masses. I generally don't believe in hype and don't follow such things. Thus, I am not a "mainstream" person. I'm a strict non-conformist.

Lots of things are bullshit to me. Like religion and modern feminism. Doesn't mean you have to agree with them. You can call me bullshit too, if that's what you think. It's your right, or as the Dude says, "Your opinion, man."



No, people aren't cynics where I am. I live in a white preppy suburban area. And besides, being cynical isn't a bad thing.



That's because I'm assuming you people have at least one thing to live for. I don't. There isn't anything to live for in my life. My problems ARE my life. There is no joy or happiness.



And the award for most useless advice ever goes too...

Seriously, what the hell is your problem? Do you think it's that simple? Do you think I can just "move on" after all of this? Fuck, do you think I WANT to be this way?

If I could, I would erase her from my life and memory. If I could, I would have never gone out with this person to save me the pain I'm going through now.

I was rejected by every single girl I ever asked out. This was the only person who ever reciprocated my feelings. There isn't any chance of me finding "another girl" here. And do you honestly think I want another relationship right now?



La-de-fucking-da. If you can't stand me, than don't respond. At least the others here haven't attacked me like you have. I don't need shit like this right now.

I'm assuming that you at least have something to live for. I have absolutely none. Hope your hand heals quickly though.

Thanks for getting aggressive at me and cursing me out for no reason, Professor, I really appreciate it. Especially since it wasn't aimed at you. I'm just more tired at the direction this thread has been taken for the last several pages and seeing no change because it's the same thing over and over again. You hate me for that, so be it, I already know you have a low opinion of me but it's not going to bother me any if you hate me or not.

Look, I know you're going through terrible times, it sucks. I'm not ignoring your plights, but I choose not to put in my two cents because I know it won't make a lick of difference with what you're dealing with. You sincerely have my condolences, but may I please ask that you don't go and outright attack someone because you misunderstand something? That's how you draw people away from you and make them hate you. I've seen that happen too many times and I would hate to see that happen to you because there are so many kind people on here who care about you deeply. Yeah, they may just be words to you, but behind those words are real people too. I'm sorry if I haven't said anything about what's going on with you, but you've been in my thoughts every single night. Whether that helps or not, I don't know, but I want you to know I'm not giving up on you. I want you to be happy and I want your life to be better.

From my understanding too, I doubt anyone is ignoring what you're posting. They've just said all that they could and can't think of anything else they could possibly say to help you out. Just because you aren't getting responses doesn't mean these people don't care. They've taken their time to address what you're going through and offer the best advice they can muster. These people are reaching out to you. Sure they're not there for you physically, but the fact that these people even went out of their way to respond and help, no matter how nicely or bluntly they put it, shows me that you're not alone on here. Yes, you feel alone in real life, but my guess is if you felt alone on here, you wouldn't be coming back in the first place. Surely there's something here that's making you feel welcome if you're choosing to come back every single day. Yeah, it's an internet forum full of words, but at the end of the day, these are still real people that are talking and reaching out to you wanting to help you out. I'd count my blessings if I had people like this helping me out in my time of trouble, even if they were online because at least it's better than no one caring at all.

I'll take my leave since I have nothing to contribute to this, but I really do hope that you'll be able to pull out of this one day, Professor, and get to have a happier life. I believe you are a good person and you don't deserve all this mess you're going through.

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I'm glad to see you're still looking forward, Professor. Don't ever stop looking forward. I don't know how many of us had experiences as nasty as yours (though I see shades of my own high school life in what you're going through), but as I believe I've pointed out before, high school's a low point for a lot of people. I'm sorry I can't be there for you in person--though even if I could, your mom or brother would probably call the police the instant I showed up and introduced myself, what with all the fearmongering (some of it justified) about meeting dangerous people online.

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I don't think you would be able to come here, seeing as you live on the opposite end of the country from me. Besides, I wouldn't waste my time coming to Pittsburgh just to see one miserable loser. I'm not worth it. Thanks anyway.

I view high school as a bullshit social game that makes freethinking people like me feel like garbage. I hate every moment of it, but you all know that by now.

There's really nothing I can do other than take it like a bitch a day at a time. With college, I'll at least be with people who are there by choice. That's the only chance I have to change things.

Alright, let me see if I've got this summed up about right:
Tophat is miserable with his life situation, and he's fully convinced that there's nothing that can help until he's a legal adult and can move.
If we try to leave the subject alone, he gets angry because he feels like we're ignoring him.
If we try to say anything, he gets angry because he feels like we're repeating the same advice over and over, which he says he's already tried and hasn't had any success.
Ergo, we're in a catch-22; one that's only serving to get tempers flared up.
If it continues like this, I can only foresee a thread lockdown.

...And now for my personal vent...

Today I was raking up grass clippings and putting them in bags... And the fucking wind! Seriously! It's like it was trying to undo my work with a strong gust every 15 seconds, ON TOP OF the fact that it was blowing fairly strong to begin with!
And I know for a fact that I was seriously P.O.'ed at it, because not even listening to 'Let It Go' helped. That almost always helps me calm down.

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Didn't lash out?



Maybe not directly but certainly passively. Your statement here implies we are all horrible people for not listening to you and ignoring you. That we are all clearly so uncaring and ignorant that you ask yourself "Why do I even bother anymore" when it comes to reaching out to us.

As I said before, Advice is a gift and as me and others have said before just because we didn't reply doesn't mean we ignored you, we just didn't feel we could help you anymore with advice.



Talking to people outside this forum and talking to people on twitter is not talking to people with specific experiences with depression. You need focused support from people who have coped or are coping with depression.
Look! One potential site!
Even Two!
Two random sites from god knows how many after a quick google search of "Depression Forum".



Tophat you sound so irrational just now. Like my Dad when he claims people on the internet aren't "real people". I met my girlfriend online, not on a dating website no, just a Final Fantasy forum. We shared some interests. I knew her for 5 years before we got together or even met for the first time in person. I would say I "knew her". What difference does it make if we've never personally met you, we've talked to you and you've talked to us, we've got enough of an understanding.

Why should our opinions not count just because we haven't met? You're willing to take the advice of people from 'Twitter' and 'outside this forum' as fact that you can't escape. Why not us? Is it a self-serving bias? Are you only considering opinions that support your conclusion valid?

Other people have supported you and told you other things than "nothing you can do". That's just fact.

@Alonso I think the thread lockdown is just waiting for the right Mod at this point.

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This again?!

TopHat, you know what is your problem? Living inside a bubble and thinking your problems are somewhat worse or special.
The world owes you nothing. We owe you nothing. Your ex-girlfrend owes you nothing. Even after your rude or redundant answers, people here still have tried to cheer you up or change your mind. You should be thankful for that instead of complaining about how nobody here has a magical formula to change your life.

And honestly? You won't go nowhere if you keep acting this way, because people don't want to try to help someone who will obviously reject
any given advices (and you cannot blame them for that).

Please, help yourself and change your victim mindset. Or at least help us to help you.

I'm also going to withdraw gracefully now. I really do wish you the best, TopHat, and urge you to do everything in your power to cut your ex out of your life and start the healing process. Best of luck to you and I hope life gets awesome for you after toughing out highschool

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I'm going to cut in here and advise against any further discussion of this issue for the time being. I'm not quite ready to lock this thread, but I've already seen fit to hand out a suspension for lashing out at another user over this latest discussion. The pieces are all here, so I'm hoping I can keep them from being put in place. Everyone, please take some time to cool off.

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Sleep time anyway, passing out now, good night people.

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Not my fault you interpreted that way. But that's what I'm used to by now. I never intended for you to think that that I view you as horrible people. Some people here have been unfairly cold and harsh to me, but I'd go as far to say that the majority haven't.



Then I'll join one of those sites when I have the time. I don't have anything to lose. But even with those I'm skeptical. What I have isn't medical depression, but natural sadness and anger as a result of my environment.



Oh no, don't interpret it that way. I'm a full supporter of Internet relationships and such. The problem is, I need to see physical people in my own life right now. With online contact, you're only with the person for a very short amount of time. I don't have any friends in my own personal life. I can't rely on the Internet completely for human contact. I'm sure that while you had a relationship with that girl online, you at least had some friends in your own day to day life. I don't have any of that. Which is why people online talking to me doesn't change my currently level of sadness.



I'm willing to listen to anyone and everyone. But what I've heard doesn't change anything. When people here offer me advice, it's the same kind that I've already heard and tried. When people agree with me and say that there's nothing I can do, that doesn't change anything either. It only affirms my misery. It's a complete no-win situation for me.



For the last time, I AM NO ONE SPECIAL. You're talking to a guy who has zero self-esteem. Don't ever view me as someone who's self-absorbed or egotistical. That being said, that doesn't prevent me from being any happier. My problems are still problems, and they occupy every aspect of my life.



Thanks for stating the obvious. Being screwed over so many times by everyone in my life has taught me that. And for the record, my girlfriend told me from the beginning that she'd always be there for me and that she cared. That sounds a lot like owing me something, especially when it's towards someone who was already lonely and miserable.



Thankful for advice that I've said for the millionth time, doesn't help me?



Have you been paying attention to anything I've said? I've taken the majority of advice given to me here in the past, and it hasn't worked.

The only new piece of potentially helpful advice that I've gotten here are those links Pierre sent me. And there you go, I'm going to check them out. Satisfied?

Edit: This was posted at the same time as Gen. Luigi's post. Do whatever you want. I'm done for now, but I'll very likely be back again. After all, my life isn't getting any better.

This discussion was supposed to be dropped already. So, drop it.

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Don't tell me what I can and can't do. If I want to talk about my problems again, I will. You don't have to be part of it.

Both of you, please stop. Locking this thread because someone's vent led to a flame war is unfortunate. Locking this thread because two people are being nit-picky about listening to a moderator is embarrassing.

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I don't want to sound like a child, but I will have to say that TopHat "started" it with his complaint that we were ignoring him. I merely pointed out that we had no other way to help him, since previous attempts have not worked or - as I also pointed out - escalated (as they have again).

My vent is this fucking sneezing I've been doing since last night. The hell, I hope I'm not coming down with anything. For one, it's annoying, and another, what if I still get good news from desigual and get a job there? Urgh. Then again, they said they'd have an answer by the end of "next week" and that was last week and it's Friday...

C-A

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I resume you my week.

Monday: My nose starts bleeding a lot at my job when I was cleaning the toilet, an employee who passed my barriers of 3 tubs sees me and freak out.

Tuesday: I went to bed at 8, fell asleep around 11 and woke up at around 2:30 am and can't get back to sleep until I have to get up at 4am.

Wednesday: I wake up at 2:30 once again and coudn't sleep again. At 4am I go take my boxe of cereal when I realise that I just walked barfoot into my dog piss, because her journal was already wet and I nearly slipped because of it.

Thursday: I decide to sleep in the basement because of the horrible heat. I put an alarm on my cellphone to wake me up as usual. I wake up, once again, at 2:30 am. I, for once, found a way to refall asleep. I wake up again and check my cellphone, 3 am. I am feeling sleepy but do not fall asleep. I wondered what time was and... it was 4:45. My bus pass at 5:10... I hurried to get ready and BAM, scratched/slapped my little toe in the door resulting in a nice bleeding coming from this little thing... And miss the bus.

Friday: Nothing out of the ordinary in sight, I wake up as usual and went to the job normally. Start a little earlier to work on the toilets because I have an important meeting forced by my boss with the syndicate at the metro nearby at 7am...I totally forgot about it and continued my work only to remember the thing at...10am).


God I'm happy this week is over.

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