Let's spork some horrible Fanfiction!

AireyVerkhovensky · Post by **AireyVerkhovensky** » Thu Mar 26, 2015 4:54 pm

*raises hand*

Rubia Ryu the Royal · Post by **Rubia Ryu the Royal** » Thu Mar 26, 2015 5:12 pm

It's another Narumitsu one made by the same artist as the doujin I posted before, titled "I Like You More Than You Think". Notice how much this girl likes to draw lawyers in action scenes.

I guess I should get to translating it for the rest of us sporkers?

Edit: Ahem, for those not interested in more yaoi, here's another precious one I've found of Cykesquill called "The Proposal Strategy". It even has a sequel.

Basically, everyone goes dorky about pairing up those two.

Oh, geez, which one should I start with?

AireyVerkhovensky · Post by **AireyVerkhovensky** » Thu Mar 26, 2015 6:22 pm

~~Not a big fan of Cykesquill but~~ the second one has Robin, Myriam, AND Aura in it! I vote that one first!

blahmoomoo · Post by **blahmoomoo** » Fri Mar 27, 2015 5:18 am

Archive.org to the rescue! Well, at least it saved the first page...

I think I'll give the support forums for invisionfree a visit tomorrow since it seems they are not aware (publicly, if not privately as well) that that entire domain is down. I'm pretty sure it hosted several forums other than Court Records 1.0.

Pessimistic_Fool · Post by **Pessimistic_Fool** » Fri Mar 27, 2015 11:38 am

Please do. My social skills are not up to doing it myself.

Darth Wiader · Post by **Darth Wiader** » Fri Mar 27, 2015 6:03 pm

And here I am, bringing you yet another fic from Kink Meme.
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/9531051/1/ ... aterslides

luck · Post by **luck** » Fri Mar 27, 2015 7:22 pm

The striking part about our ultra-long kink meme is not how disturbing some prompts are, that's just expected, but how silly some of them are.

Rubia Ryu the Royal · Post by **Rubia Ryu the Royal** » Fri Mar 27, 2015 7:58 pm

It's Ace Attorney. ANYTHING can happen. See, this is what people learn from this game.

On another note, I'm still working on that manga translation, so please be patient. Hopefully, I won't be interrupted by something in the meantime.

Rubia Ryu the Royal · Post by **Rubia Ryu the Royal** » Sun Mar 29, 2015 6:17 pm

I don't usually ship those two, but when I do, I prefer a soothing cup of red tea to accompany my tireless efforts. 54 pages, whew.

Spoiler: The Proposal Strategy

Spoiler: Part 2

And thank you for giving me such a tedious assignment, Airey. (The worst of it was the indistinguishable kanji at times, yeesh.) So, who's up for this sporking?

AireyVerkhovensky · Post by **AireyVerkhovensky** » Sun Mar 29, 2015 6:37 pm

Hahaha sorry. I can't really do much online until after spring break (the week after next) but if no one's claimed it by then, I'll spork it when I get back from Europe! :salute:

luck · Post by **luck** » Wed Apr 01, 2015 8:34 pm

Hi guys. I've written another sporking and I need someone to edit it, but Airey isn't able at the moment, so if somone wants to help me, please PM me.

PoppyCorn · Post by **PoppyCorn** » Thu Apr 02, 2015 4:53 pm

Hello! For the past few days I've been reading through the sporks on this thread, and I've been loving it! They never fail to make me laugh.

I was wondering, what characters do you find harder to write? I'm wanting to attempt to do a spork, but I'm not to confident in my writing skills, so I want to try something a bit easier. From what I've heard Fransizka seems pretty easy to flanderize. (I should note I've only played up to T&T, so I don't think I could write any AJ or DD characters. )

I'm sorry for how awkward this introduction was.

Rubia Ryu the Royal · Post by **Rubia Ryu the Royal** » Thu Apr 02, 2015 7:00 pm

No worries! We welcome all sorts of writers here! If you want to try your hand on one, click here for our most recently updated list (or the few others scattered over the this and the previous page). And choose any sporker you want. As of late, we've brought in any sorts of characters regardless of whether they're sporkers or "management" or just visitors.

I feel pretty natural with most characters, but I tend to focus on the main cast. Godot is certainly one of the more difficult ones to capture just because of how much of a badass he is that is often lost within a multitude of coffee puns and analogies. It's a similar problem with Blackquill, to a lesser extent. I notice that even Edgeworth sometimes comes off as a little too flat when he's not being sarcastic (which ends up as 90% of the time). As for Franziska, she's not too bad; just tone down on the number of times she ends up throwing a fit.

Speaking of which, which number of (incredible) sporkings am I on now? I didn't keep track.

luck · Post by **luck** » Thu Apr 02, 2015 11:27 pm

Rubia has been helping me out and the sporking is finally ready, so, without further ado...

Welcome to another chapter of 'There has to be a line where you can't even call it porn anymore' with luck! Today's fic is Our Love Will Survive by KookieEvans.

Rating:

Basically, a not-very well written smutty fic with very very unfortunate implications.

And today's sporkers are...

Maya Fey!

"It's been so long since my last sporking that I almost miss it."

Miles Edgeworth!

"You'll regret those words before this is over."

Phoenix Wright!

"Do you know something about today's fic?"

And...

:think-think-think:

Apollo Justice!

"Not that he needs to tell that."

[We open up in our sporking theater. Miles Edgeworth and Apollo Justice are already seated, while Maya Fey and Phoenix Wright have just entered.]

Maya: Hi, guys! It's been a while.

Edgeworth: I whole-heartedly envy you.

Phoenix: Why are you so upbeat, anyway? Don't you remember what your last sporking was?

Maya: No. I made a great effort to forget it.

Apollo: Let's just get this over with.

Speakers: Your wish is our command. As long as they are according to our plans.

[The lights dim and the fic starts]

The warm water from the shower cascaded down over Phoenix's head, completely flattening his black spikes.

Phoenix: Hey! My hair doesn't flatten with water! That's Apollo's. Mine is totally natural.

Maya: It's true. I've seen him soaked.

Phoenix: I can show you. Apollo, bring water.

Apollo: If you want water bottles, they're sitting right across from you.

Maya: Come on, Apollo! Don't you want to see his magical superpowered hair? It might even change colors...

Apollo: No.

Phoenix: ...Maya, if you expect him to do something, you need to work on your descriptions.

Apollo: I don't want water getting anywhere near my hair.

Mia smiled, nuzzling her face into her lover's back.

Phoenix: Chief!?

Maya: Sis!?

Phoenix: Why are we having a shower together!?

Edgeworth: Does the word 'lover' mean anything to you?

Phoenix: Management, if you're so eager to show us smut, you could at least choose a fic where none of the people here appears.

Speakers: Well, we've found recently a very explicit TrucyxMr. Hat fic, if you're interested.

Phoenix: Are you trying to bluff the master of bluff? There can't be someone sick enough to write that.

Edgeworth: Are you willing to take the risk?

Apollo: I'm certainly not. Keep this one.

His hair was a lot longer than she had expected. Then again, she hadn't seen him for years. It was bound to have grown.

Apollo: You know, people cut their hair when it's too long.

Phoenix: She hasn't seen me for years? I hope this is not implying what I think it's implying.

Edgeworth: Why do you keep hoping things here, Wright?

She ran a hand across his neck, slender fingers dancing across his skin round to the front of his body, and scraped her long nails down his throat, brushing his adam's apple and leaving red marks. He shuddered delightfully, and she smirked.

Maya: 'She scraped her long nails down his throat, brushing his adam's apple and leaving red marks'? Is that supposed to be a smutty scene?

Edgeworth: It sounds rather painful.

Phoenix: Why do people describe sex scenes as if it were a murder?

Apollo: I wish it were a murder.

"M-Mia…" Phoenix gasped shakily, and she pressed her luscious lips against the back of his neck, making sure she pushed her body hard to his so he could feel her nipples erect against his back.

Apollo: Wouldn't it make more sense if the back was the luscious thing in that sentence?

Mia: Oh. The sporking theatre.

Phoenix: Maya couldn't take more of this, huh?

Edgeworth: None of us would be here if we could escape somehow.

"God, I've missed this so much Phoenix." She murmured, trailing her hand lazily over his chest. His breath caught in his throat.

Apollo: If she has missed it so much, why does she do it lazily?

Phoenix: And what's that supposed to mean by 'his breath caught in his throat'?

"So have I. It's been so long…" He broke off into a hiss as her hand lowered, brushing against his long organ.

Mia: Don't they usually cut out the sex scenes?

Phoenix: They could very well be talking about the musical instrument with that description. A long one.

Apollo: That you just happen to have in your shower.

[She keeps playing with his 'long organ' and...]

he bucked his hips forward, desperate for more contact.

Phoenix: What did I just do?

Apollo: You bucked. Like a horse.

Mia: This fic makes me more confused than uncomfortable.

"Naughty, naughty!" Mia withdrew her hand and tutted at him as he whined. "Be a good boy, and I'll give you what you want…"

Phoenix let out a shaky breath, and shuddered.

Apollo: That sentence...doesn't really make any sense here.

Phoenix: Fic-me sure is afraid of whatever it means.

"Mia…do you think we're doing the right thing?" Phoenix gulped, and he felt the brunette step away from him, and he mourned the loss of her body heat.

Edgeworth: Really, author? Mourned?

"W-What do you mean?" She stuttered, suddenly unsure of herself.

Mia: Fic-me seems pretty emotionally unstable, all of a sudden.

"Well, it's not you is it? I mean, it might be your soul, but it's Maya's body…" He pressed his eyes shut tightly.

Mia: What!?

Phoenix: No, Fic-me! What you're doing is not right!

Edgeworth: Certainly, it could even be considered rape.

"Phoenix look at me." She took him by the shoulders and spun him around so that he was facing her, and she took his hand in hers. She placed his hand to her heart, so he could feel the thumping of the familiar and comfortable beat. "Does it look like Maya's body? Does this feel like her heartbeat?"

"No." Phoenix's chocolate eyes snapped onto hers. "No it doesn't."

Apollo: Sure. The heartbeat. That's the main difference he's feeling in her chest.

Mia: Mr. Justice!

Apollo: Sorry, Ms. Fey. I'm just trying to keep my sanity.

Phoenix: You don't seem too scarred today.

Edgeworth: That's just the platinum rule of the sporking theatre.

All: You better than me.

And with that he kissed her.

He moved his mouth slowly against Mia's, softly, softly, until she forced his mouth open, plundering it ruthlessly.

Apollo: How do you plunder a mouth ruthlessly?

Phoenix: How do you plunder a mouth at all?

Edgeworth: Apparently, out of place metaphors are a given in this kind of fic.

Phoenix: But what's it supposed to mean?

Apollo: Maybe it's really literal. Do you have any gold teeth?

Phoenix: If I had, I would have sold them in my disbarred years.

Apollo: Trucy can be a really expensive girl, huh?

Phoenix: Yeah, well. That and grape juice.

Apollo: (Why did I decide to work for him again?)

He fought back as well as he could, but it was obvious she was winning. She explored every inch of his mouth, leaving her mark. Then she smirked against his mouth, and bit down on the fleshy pad of his lower lip, hard enough to make it bleed.

Mia: Is this a kiss or a battle?

Edgeworth: A recurrent question in this kind of fic, too.

"Ah!" Phoenix pulled back with shock, and looked up at Mia, then groaned. He was never more turned on than when he saw her, a dangerous glint in her eye, an evil grin on her face and his blood trickling from her thick lips.

Phoenix: No offense to anyone, but...that's sick.

In seconds he pulled her back into his arms, snarling and biting at her long, pure neck. He grinned at the harsh red marks he had left as her fingernails scratched down his back.

Apollo: Really, are they making out or trying to kill each other?

Phoenix: I don't even know anymore.

Mia: Biting a neck until leaving red marks sounds pretty excessive.

Apollo: Unless you're a vampire.

Phoenix: First a horse and now a vampire. I'm afraid of what this thing could turn into if Fic-me keeps transforming.

"Can't wait any longer…" He panted and Mia nodded in agreement, then slammed him against the wall, lowering her head to his chest to graze his sensitive nipples with her teeth.

Mia: Men nipples aren't all that sensitive.

Apollo: But it'd still hurt if someone grazed them with their teeth.

Phoenix tried out, and played with her in response until they were hard little buds. They were both sweaty and panting now, and they both knew it was time.

Edgeworth: Hard little buds? Really, author? That's the classiest comparison you could come up with?

Phoenix cupped her white rounded buttocks with his hands, and she wrapped her arms around his neck, then swung herself up so that her feet were either side of his hips.

Mia: That's a rather difficult movement to perform in that position.

Apollo: Now you're acrobats at a circus.

Phoenix: Now I'm imagining a vampire horse doing acrobatics.

[And they get to the thing.]

She used her feet which were firmly planted on the tiled wall, to push herself away so he was almost completely out of her, then slammed herself back against him.

Phoenix: W-what!?

Apollo: Yep. Definitely acrobats at a circus.

Mia: This shower sure is roomy.

[And they keep with the thing.]

Mia's hips raised faster to meet his, and she cried out as each thrust made his throbbing manhood brush against that special spot inside her. She could feel the tension inside her rising and rising until she thought she would explode.

Mia: 'Throbbing manhood'?

Phoenix: 'Special spot inside her'?

Edgeworth: There has to be a stupid euphemism competition going on somewhere. There's no other explanation.

[And they get over with the thing.]

The slipped to the shower floor together, water still pounding on their skin, and instead of pulling out they pushed towards each other so much it felt like they were the only two people in the universe.

Edgeworth: If they don't count the spirit medium whose body they've profaned.

Phoenix: The water have been flowing all this time? Next bill is going to be expensive. I don't think I can afford such a waste.

Apollo: At least Fic-you is in-character when it comes to economical responsibility.

Phoenix: I always can cut your salary if I ever need it. (Power feels great. Now I understand Edgeworth.)

Maya: What did I miss?

Apollo: They used your body for sexual purposes without taking any precautions.

Maya: *goes pale*

Edgeworth: Never forget the mythril rule of the sporking theater, Maya.

All: Never. Ask.

[And so, another sporking ends, with our sporkers more scarred than yesterday but not as much as tomorrow.]

PoppyCorn · Post by **PoppyCorn** » Fri Apr 03, 2015 2:35 am

@Luck amazing sporking! Those metaphors were something else, that's for sure. I always enjoy it when Mia shows up.

@Rubia thank you for the advice and the links! There are a few that catch my eye, so I think I'll try to do one, even if I don't post it.

shippersdreamer · Post by **shippersdreamer** » Thu Apr 09, 2015 6:42 am

I actually have a few questions for whoever runs this shindig:
Is it possible for one person sporks or does there have to be two people?
Also are there any untaken Apollo ones at the moment? I love seeing the guy suffer.

Mayu Igiyooki · Post by **Mayu Igiyooki** » Thu Apr 09, 2015 8:04 am

Airey and Rubia - noone comes here anymore to spork horrible AA FanFictions. Does that mean the Sporkhouse is adjourned?

shippersdreamer · Post by **shippersdreamer** » Thu Apr 09, 2015 4:34 pm

Ace Pointer wrote:Airey and Rubia - noone comes here anymore to spork horrible AA FanFictions. Does that mean the Sporkhouse is adjourned?

If that's the case, I can only think of two things.
Either someone keeps it going or someone writes the sporker's freedom.

Rubia Ryu the Royal · Post by **Rubia Ryu the Royal** » Thu Apr 09, 2015 5:53 pm

Don't be silly. We will continue to keep this thread going. Even if it takes a several-month break in silence, the Theater will live on in its fullest glory!

Unless, of course, you guys actually want things to end, but where's the fun in that?

Incidentally, Airey's gone abroad for Europe and might not be back for some few days (not sure when she'll be back). I, meanwhile, have been busy maintaining a now chaotic blog among my busy work schedule, so I haven't had time to get to any more. If anyone else would like to keep things going, feel free to do so. I'll be keeping tabs from the shadows if anyone needs me.

And @shippersdreamer No, a sporking doesn't have a required number of sporkers, but it's somewhat sad if it's only one without anyone else but the Management or the guards to talk to. And as for Apollo fics, Airey's still got that huge list of untaken fics: http://forums.court-records.net/viewtop ... 7#p1296157

And then there are those few manga I've picked up from pixiv (posted at the top of this page), but some of them will need to be translated. If anyone's interested in sporking any of them, let me know.

shippersdreamer · Post by **shippersdreamer** » Thu Apr 09, 2015 5:58 pm

Rubia Ryu the Royal wrote:Don't be silly. We will continue to keep this thread going. Even if it takes a several-month break in silence, the Theater will live on in its fullest glory!

Unless, of course, you guys actually want things to end, but where's the fun in that?

Incidentally, Airey's gone abroad for Europe and might not be back for some few days (not sure when she'll be back). I, meanwhile, have been busy maintaining a now chaotic blog among my busy work schedule, so I haven't had time to get to any more. If anyone else would like to keep things going, feel free to do so. I'll be keeping tabs from the shadows if anyone needs me.

And @shippersdreamer No, a sporking doesn't have a required number of sporkers, but it's somewhat sad if it's only one without anyone else but the Management or the guards to talk to. And as for Apollo fics, Airey's still got that huge list of untaken fics: http://forums.court-records.net/viewtop ... 7#p1296157

And then there are those few manga I've picked up from pixiv (posted at the top of this page), but some of them will need to be translated. If anyone's interested in sporking any of them, let me know.

Oh sweet!
Are there any requirements needed to spork now! I gave it a shot the last time I was here (unfortunately, school and personal issues kept me away for so long), or are the rules generally still the same as last time?

Rubia Ryu the Royal · Post by **Rubia Ryu the Royal** » Thu Apr 09, 2015 6:26 pm

Go wild. I've already brought back the original Management, but you're free to change up the members to anyway you wish. Heck, bring in some new characters while you're at it.

Of course, by this point, I think some of these veteran sporkers may have begun to experience chronic cases of depression, but I'll leave the details to your sporks.

I can also act as an editor if you'd like, in case there's anything you want me to help with. I look forward to working with new sporkers!

shippersdreamer · Post by **shippersdreamer** » Thu Apr 09, 2015 6:33 pm

Rubia Ryu the Royal wrote:Go wild. I've already brought back the original Management, but you're free to change up the members to anyway you wish. Heck, bring in some new characters while you're at it.

Of course, by this point, I think some of these veteran sporkers may have begun to experience chronic cases of depression, but I'll leave the details to your sporks.

I can also act as an editor if you'd like, in case there's anything you want me to help with. I look forward to working with new sporkers!

Oh wow. I read Turnabout Hedgehog.
I might decide to take that one, that's....wow.
Y'know I feel kinda bad for Phoenix and Gumshoe now.

Cesar Zero · Post by **Cesar Zero** » Thu Apr 09, 2015 11:36 pm

Ace Pointer wrote:Airey and Rubia - noone comes here anymore to spork horrible AA FanFictions. Does that mean the Sporkhouse is adjourned?

Just wanted to point out in case anyone wondered that there are still some non-sporkers reading this thread.I would love to give it a try but I don't think I have enough writing skills,specially when it comes to jokes.

Rubia Ryu the Royal · Thu Apr 09, 2015 11:56 pm

We appreciate the loyal viewership, guys, and we by no means are forcing you to participate. It's all on an up-to-you basis.

I never thought I'd say this, but it seems my works are in demand during Airey's absence. Since I am at a loss regarding what to move onto, I'm up for suggestions. Is there anything in particular you guys want me to spork?

shippersdreamer · Post by **shippersdreamer** » Fri Apr 10, 2015 12:00 am

Rubia Ryu the Royal wrote:We appreciate the loyal viewership, guys, and we by no means are forcing you to participate. It's all on an up-to-you basis.

I never thought I'd say this, but it seems my works are in demand during Airey's absence. Since I am at a loss regarding what to move onto, I'm up for suggestions. Is there anything in particular you guys want me to spork?

I say surprise us!

Cesar Zero · Post by **Cesar Zero** » Fri Apr 10, 2015 12:21 am

I don't really have any fic in mind,though I generally prefer the "So bad,it's hilarious" fics over the ones which are just boring.

EDIT: OMG 666 post.I dunno how that relates to this thread,but people usually point out this stuff so whatever.

PoppyCorn · Post by **PoppyCorn** » Fri Apr 10, 2015 2:50 am

@Rubia If you'd like suggestions, I'd love to see this one : https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10876823/1 ... ISOOOOOOON

The only problem is that they seem to know that we're considering it, so it may be a bit of a moral question if you'd want to do it (if that even makes sense).

Rubia Ryu the Royal · Post by **Rubia Ryu the Royal** » Fri Apr 10, 2015 3:05 am

MY GOD How did you know which one I was gonna pick!?

...Er, I mean, I'm totally not going with it. I-it's a surprise, see... ;>3>

Rubia Ryu the Royal · Post by **Rubia Ryu the Royal** » Fri Apr 10, 2015 7:58 am

Welp, cat's outta the bag. As much as I'd love to touch on the kink meme stuff, there are just too many Wrightworth fics to choose, so I'm going for something completely different. Besides, this sporking was basically requested by the author, and I have no qualms about it.

DAMON GANT ESCAPS FROM PRISOOOOOOON

Rating:

Ah, man. I have not given a Four-Sahwit rating in a long... wait, did I ever? Maybe. Anyway, I figured my inner Grammar Nazi self was pricking up again, and this one is way too stupid not to spork. I hope you all enjoy!

Cast:

------------------------------------

[Rumors say that the Sporking Theater has been a hotspot for media coverage. As time goes on, it seems they are becoming more and more likely to be true. However, what better way to up the ante with some extra excitement? Go on, sporkers. Give us an answer.]

Phoenix: Uh... have I already snapped, or is the intro talking to us?

Edgeworth: As much as I'd like to choose the former, even I heard a voice coming from somewhere outside the speakers.

Maya: Geez, just when you thought the theater couldn't get creepier... but this has got to be another of those pranks from the Management, right?

Speakers: Well, if it isn't our favorite ace attorneys and company! It's good to see you again!

Phoenix: D-Damon Gant!?

Edgeworth: Hadn't the original Management returned? Where have they left now!?

Franziska: Miles Edgeworth! What is the meaning of this!? The only reason I returned was for the opportunity to whip those fools silly!

Edgeworth: It was the truth, Franziska! Those good-for-nothing excuses were actually here!

Phoenix: And I can stand by that. I was here with him when they returned.

Speakers: Now, now. There's no need for this hostility. The original staff simply reconsidered taking another temporary leave.

Phoenix: Another one!? They came back for only one session!

Speakers: Haha! You losers actually thought things were gonna get back to "normal"! This Sporking Theater is free reign, you know!

Maya: W-wait, isn't that...?

*crack*

Phoenix: Ow!

Franziska: Enough fooling around! If those whimpering, whiny wusses of "management" are not present, then I have no point in staying!

Phoenix: (Aim that thing away from me! Why turn me into collateral!?)

Edgeworth: Franziska, you should know by now that once you enter this theater, you won't be leaving until we've had to endure through at least one of these horrid creations.

Franziska: Hmph. Haven't you noticed the lack of security of this building, Miles? There's not a guard to be found, now that this site has gone to rack and ruin. What is there to stop me from stepping out now?

Speakers: Oh, if you must know, we've actually undergone security improvements.

Franziska: W-what?

[And "clank" go the lobby entrance doors.]

Maya: Whoa! They've locked us in!

Phoenix: What the!?

Speakers: Even though I'm no longer a chief at all, it doesn't mean I can't contribute something to this theater! And I figured those poor guards needed a break from time to time, so I've asked a few sponsors to install automatic lockdown systems in here!

Whoa-ho, dude! It's, like, about time! This dilapidated building really needed some refurnishing. We're living in the 21st century, yeah?

All: ...

Edgeworth: As I thought. The lack of security was too good to be true.

Phoenix: Well, you sure came in here without a sign of hesitation.

Edgeworth: Come on, Wright. I wouldn't be nearly so naive. I simply didn't see the point to bothering to escape. At the very least, the theater is still in working order. We might as well enjoy our stay.

All: ...

Phoenix: Uh, Edgeworth? You doing okay?

Maya: Uh-oh. Looks like Mr. Edgeworth's finally gone over the edge... er, pun not intended.

Phoenix: Oh, and here I thought you were waiting to say that.

Maya: Will he be alright?

*crack*

Edgeworth: Mmph!

Franziska: It's much too early to be giving in, Miles Edgeworth! Have some backbone!

Edgeworth: Ugh... O-of course I know that. But the sooner we get through it, the sooner we can leave.

Franziska: Management! *crack* Hurry up and get to your stupid, pointless, asinine fanfiction already!

Speakers: My, my... We never would have expected that you would come to ask so eagerly to begin. This theater sure has come a long way.

All: !!

Franziska: So, you WERE here all this time! Get over here so I can whip you!

Phoenix: Ms. von Karma, I highly doubt they'd listen to you, especially when you're like thi- Yeooww!

Franziska: I didn't ask for your opinion.

Phoenix: Yes, ma'am. Sorry.

Maya: Um, yeah... well, here's to hoping this next one won't be too torturous! Or a rape fic. I think I've had enough of those already.

Edgeworth: Another rule of thumb, Maya: Never doubt that a fic can become a rape fic.

Maya: Y-you don't have to remind me, Mr. Edgeworth!

[And now we skip to the screening room for the very amusing adventure that awaits them.]

Spoiler:

[And the lights flick on.]

Franziska: Finally! Good riddance.

Speakers: Ah, wasn't that refreshing, folks?

Edgeworth: ...

Phoenix: *whimper*

Maya: ...Well, it was pretty messy and all, but it wasn't that ba-

Franziska: It was vile. End of story.

Speakers: Oh, I wouldn't say it was all so terrible. There were quite some amusing moments in there too.

Ugh, whatever, dude. I'm done. Just get me back to my cell already...

Rest assured, you all will be reappearing for the following follow-up sessions!

[As soon as that was said, everyone hurries out as quickly as possible... all except for Gant and the manager.]

Speakers: Aw, aren't you all simply anxious for next time? ...Oh, Gant, you're still here?

Before I go, I have one more thing to ask. Just what exactly would our roles be to remain behind the speakers if we're not exactly part of the Management any longer? After all, it's still you and your fellow managers who have been in control all this time...

That, Mr. Gant, will be a matter to be discussed another time. You are dismissed.

...Well, alright, then! Thanks for summoning me from my cell! These visits have become more and more amusing, haven't they?

Indeed, they have. Hahahahaha...

[And once those two take their leave, the theater once again falls into silence. And once again, this narrator has been left all alone... but there's always next time! Stay tuned for more strange shenanigans in our wonderful Sporking Theater!]

PoppyCorn · Post by **PoppyCorn** » Fri Apr 10, 2015 1:40 pm

@Rubia ah! That was amazing. My only problem was the Gant/Engarde colors were really similar, but since they speak so differently I could usually tell by that.

Speaking of that, bringing in those two was a great idea. The reactions were great.

Mayu Igiyooki · Post by **Mayu Igiyooki** » Fri Apr 10, 2015 1:58 pm

That was my favorite fic, but seeing you sporking it... I would rather say that I liked the sporked one by double. :mike-salute:

[quote="Mike Meekins"]THANK YOU FOR KEEPING THE SPORKHOUSE IN SESSION, SIR!! WAITING FOR YOU TO SPORK ANOTHER ONE!!!

[quote]

...Yeah, that's what would Meekins say if he sees it.

i started to get abit fancy of the Sporkhouse, so thanks for keeping thr sporkhouse alive.

PoppyCorn · Post by **PoppyCorn** » Sat Apr 11, 2015 4:08 am

I hope this is okay to do, but I'd like to claim the fic Pheenox's revenge for sporking purposes. It's just to good to pass up! Er... to bad to pass up?

Rubia Ryu the Royal · Post by **Rubia Ryu the Royal** » Sat Apr 11, 2015 4:35 am

Have fun! Since I can't update Airey's post for her, let's just make a mental note for now.

When I find a little more time, I'll get to the next part of mine. In the meantime, you're free to post your own. You are allowed to use the same cast as well, but for diversity's sake, I suggest a slightly different group.

PoppyCorn · Post by **PoppyCorn** » Sun Apr 12, 2015 6:02 am

Does anybody want lazy fanart of a really old sporking?

... No?

Too bad! http://imgur.com/so34Ndl

It was Aireys old Law plus Chaos sporking, back when frenzy was wearing the sexy court outfit. ~~can you tell I have no sense of fashion~~

Also, a few questions

1) How does the sporking theater layout work? I feel like there was old fanart of it (or a link to it anyway), but the link didn't work last time I checked.

2) Bringing in characters from different time periods is allowed, as long as they existed during that time period, correct?

Rubia Ryu the Royal · Post by **Rubia Ryu the Royal** » Sun Apr 12, 2015 6:23 am

...Sexy. Larry would be proud.

Unfortunately, that link broke long before the backup forums were removed, so I never quite got a chance to see the picture myself. The layout is basically however we want to imagine it. I think there is room somewhere for an entire courtroom, and one of the screening rooms is actually hiding a stage behind the screen. But, I'm sure every room has some form of lockdown system that keeps its audience it their seats... and may even electrocute them if necessary.

Oh, and I was the one who set up the teleporter in the lobby... and fired all the guards. Wheee.

Yes, you may call anyone from any time period, no matter how short that time period is. Makes it useful for channeled spirits, I say.

AireyVerkhovensky · Post by **AireyVerkhovensky** » Sun Apr 12, 2015 7:14 pm

Haha! Back from France! Great sporkings, luck and Rubia! Great fanart, PoppyCorn!

Since no one seems to have claimed that comic while I was gone, I'll probably get that done in the next few days.

Rubia Ryu the Royal · Post by **Rubia Ryu the Royal** » Sun Apr 12, 2015 7:35 pm

Welcome back! Looking forward to it. My work here is done... for now.

Veruni · Post by **Veruni** » Mon Apr 20, 2015 11:53 pm

I would really love to see a sporking of this masterpiece: http://freetexthost.com/vlcy52xckl

Next to Phoenix's Turnabout, the last two chapters of which are tragically lost forever, that's my favorite trollfic of all time.

Darth Wiader · Post by **Darth Wiader** » Tue Apr 21, 2015 8:17 am

^
This. This fic just looks like a perfect spork material. And I'm sure that it'd at least get 5 Sahwits.

Cesar Zero · Post by **Cesar Zero** » Tue Apr 21, 2015 10:40 pm

The story begins on a boat(cuz myle is scared of elevators ;]

I gave up.I ain't reading this until it gets a sporking.