- Phoenix, let's discuss the case...over drinks *wink*
- What are you..oh, no, YOU'RE WANTING TO DATE ME SO YOU KILL ME, AREN'T YOU?
- What? What made y-
- STAY AWAY FROM ME! I NOW KNOW WHAT THAT JEWEL IS FOR! IT'S GOING TO BE THE END OF ME!
- Phoenix, calm dow-
- CALM DOWN! HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO CALM DOWN?! YOU'RE PLANNING TO KILL ME!!
- (Looks like he never did get over Chinami)

Must... Keep... Topic... Alive....

Hey Wright...
What is it Edgeworth? I'm kinda busy.
Going to make out with Maya?
This isn't one of Chinese Infantry's funnies.
Thank God! Even I get bored of watching you and Maya star in soft porn...
...I heard that. Don't think I can't start shipping you and Oldbag, Edgeworth.
I'll be good!
*cough* Anyway, I was just wondering. What if you were a Fat Woman Mech-Pilot?
...
...
...
Don't ever go on Court Records again.

---

Continuing my Hotel Dusk story

What happened to Nick!?

He thinks he's Kyle Hyde from Hotel Dusk.

Hotel... Dusk... OH, that movie that came out last week! Is it any good?

It is, but the strangest thing was that when I went to see it with Nick, he fell asleep halfway through the movie, so I'm suprised he knows enough about Kyle to imitate him.

L13k wh@t r j00 guYz d0ing!!111

How the hell did fatty get in here!?

WAIT! We need him! I have an idea to get Nick back to normal.

LOL PWNZOrZ'd

Phoenix is found at the Gatewater Hotel knocking on all the room doors.

*knocks on a door*

GOD DAMMIT! GO AWAY, MR. WRIGHT!

I'm getting pretty good at knocking on doors now.

*knocks on another door*

Ngh! Go away! It's bad enough that I'm alive for no apparent reason!

I'm really bruising my knuckles with all this knocking.

*knocks on a third door*

The door opens up this time.

WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT!!?!

YAH!!!

Phoenix runs away.

Damn, that Iris girl really scares me since she became a redhead.

At the entrance of the hotel, Sal is standing there in suspenders, old pants, and a white shirt.

j00 think d1s w1ll w0rk???

Just do it!

To be continued.

---

That ain't porn, mate. THIS IS PORN!



*end tape*

SWEET SHIT!

.....MIA!

....LANA.....

Where the hell did you get that?

Let's see, I went back in time to when Lana and Mia were at law school together and planted video cameras in Mia and Lana's bedrooms. The rest went from there.

That is the most sick, vile disgusting thing I have ever seen...

So? What's your point?

I'll give you $30 for it.

Deal!

MAYA!

Aww, I'll let you watch it with me too, Nicky-kins! *Kisses Phoenix*

(This funny is wrong on so many levels. I knew Maya was bi-curious, but this. CI needs to get his mind out of the gutter!)

And now, you too, can own a copy of Chinese Infantry's latest porn tape: "Homosexual Encounters between a Defense Attorney and a Prosecutor not named Phoenix Wright and Miles Edgeworth" for only $30.00. Or you can have it for three easy payments of $10.00 or six easy payments of $5.00.

Isn't that all the same thing reworded.

Quiet, I'm trying to take people's money here!

Yeah, I know I have a dirty mind. Don't bother pointing it out...

---

Now the third and final part of Hotel Phoenix.

Sal approaches Phoenix in character.

Erm, hello Kyle. It's me, Dunning. Remember?

Oh, hey. Ya got a minute?

Erm, yes. Ya need sumtin'?

For absolutely no reason, tell me the reason you changed the name of this hotel from Hotel Dusk to Gatewater Hotel.

Ah, you see, I...

While Sal is improvising, Maya is sneaking behind Phoenix with a large metal pole.

If it caused him to think he's Kyle, the same thing may cause him to think he's Phoenix again...

Maya is holding up the pole, ready to swing it at Phoenix's head like a bat and tee-ball. But suddenly...

You foolishly foolish batch of foolishly foolish fools! Where can I find that young perverted bellboy? He got my coffee wrong and- Mr. Phoenix Wright!

You talking to me?

Yes, you foolishly foolish fool.

Damn it, my name it Kyle. Kyle Hyde! I'm a traveling salesman working for the Red Crown. I don't have time to play around with a weird dame like yo-

WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL ME?!

OOF!

*whipping Phoenix like mad*

ACK!!

And now for the metal pole!

Franziska slams the metal pole back into Phoenix's head and he passes out. Maya and Larry are shocked, while Sal looks like his usual sweaty self.

Later, Phoenix wakes up on the sofa.

You're awake! Is your name Kyle?

Huh...

Phoenix looks around at the office and then looks at Maya again.

Of course I'm not Kyle.

YAY!!!! NICK'S BACK!!

YAY!

My name's obviously Derek Stiles! I'm a surgeon. Oh crap, I'm late for work!

Phoenix runs out the door.

Oh no...

THE END

---

CI, you win at life so many times that I can't count how many.

CI if only that video were real.

---

: You know, Ema, if you're jealous, I can make arrangements...

: Homminahomminahommina....

---

-During the Phoenix Wright Funnies Annual General Meeting-

- Okay, guys, in the last year we managed to wring as much as we can out of a lot of jokes, especially ones about Edgeworths masturbation habits.
- Which are completely exaggurated: I only do it once a month.
- ...right. So we need to come up with some fresh material this year to keep the thread going. Any suggestions?
- Tricky one there. Why don't we have a character vs. character competition.
- Nope, that one's being covered at the moment. With Pokemon to boot.
- Jokes about a certain paring. *wink*
- Yes, YES! Give me my Edgey-poo!
- *sigh* I'm tempted to call you Amy, you know that, Maya?
- And stay the Hell away from me, Oldbag. Next idea, please.
- Jokes about how someone is a miserable failure at everything.
- Why did you look at me when you said that?
- The games have that ground covered. Besides, it's too easy. Any more ideas?
- OMFG, LIEK HAV SUMONE ANSWER TEH FAN EMAILS!!1
- Sal, I know about Strong Bad E-Mails: Maya increases my headache pill intake every time a new one comes out. And enough of the Doggamn leet-speak, for chrissakes. Anyone else.
- Make a platformer game spin-off.
- Hmm, I like the sound of that idea. Let me dwell on it for a few minutes...

INTRODUCING....PHOENIX THE ATTOURNEY

Take Phoenix Wright, the fastest lawyer in the world, in a quest for the seven jewels of justice. Run through tropical beaches, though crazy amusement parks, 360 degree loop-de-loop rollercoasters and much more as he aims to stop the nefarious plan of his arch-enemy, Dr. Manfred von Karma, and his legions of Forgeniks.

- Yes, that's perfect for a spin-off. Plenty jokes can be made off that.
- You do realise you're going to get sued for that, right?

...

...

...

You just made my whole day better, Chinese Infantry. Thanks!

Time for Boston Legal!
as Alan Shore
as the defendant
as the judge

When my brother called me I was with a prostitute, getting my toes sucked..
You can stop there!
You told me to be honest.
Getting you toes sucked?
I get kicks that way, I'm not very proud of it.
Do you pay extra for that?
You honor, the case please.

i know i'm a bit late, but the front page reminded me of something my friend told me.

Edgeworth. What were you doing?
i was mas--
WE KNOW ALREADY!
--tering the arts of tae kwon do.

so, has anyone heard of Mitch Hedberg?
You see, i love red wine. This girl came up to me and asked,
" but doesnt wine give you a headache?"
well. yeah. EVENTUALLY. But the first and the middle part are AMAZING. i'm not going to stop something because of what happens at the end.
"Hey, you want an apple?"
"no. eventually it'll be a core."

is shot at for attempting to be funny.
i'd LOVE to see a Phoenix Wrong with Dave Chappelle or Mitch Hedberg...

and, bytheby, CI.
HOLY HFIUANFLAKJ.

---

Last edited by tsurikato on Wed Apr 11, 2007 1:00 pm, edited 1 time in total.

*walks in, with all sorts of ideas to be funny with. Glances at recent posts.*

...

...


......


........ *walks out again, in need of new ideas.*

---

Aaaaand.... CI is nuts. >.>

Why am I Larry? >.>

<.<

Okay, Larry's not that bad a fit *cough*

---

Because I figured it would be the best fit for you.

Of course, if you don't like it, I could make you .

---

- Hey, don't you look down on us! I told you! We're not a bunch of simpletons, pal! Everyone knows you can't find out everything you want with scientific investigation!
- What did you say?
- Everyone knows you can't find out everything you want with scientific investi-OW, MY EYES, PAL!
- Now if you'd kindly revise the testimony without that statement, then I might put the Luminol away.
- Yes, Sir! OW!
- And don't call me "Sir".
- (Wow, who's that hotness. I'm wonder if she'll-) OW!
- Don't even think about it!

Previously...

??? 4 Hello! I've come to challenge you to a Davy Back Fight!

*Snores*

Who are you-ttebayo?!

??? 4 I am...

*The person removes his mask.*

I AM MONKEY D. LUFFY, THE ONE WHO WILL BECOME PIRATE KING!!!

*The other people on the Lion Ship remove their masks as well.*

AND THESE GUYS ARE SOME OF MY CREW!!!

...

WE ARE THE STRAW HAT PIRATES!!!

NO WAI!!!

*Snores*

Now... After Al's long week of annoying exams and crap... It's time for... THE GYAKUTEN SAIBAN CHARACTER GRAND PRIX!!!

Welcome aboard to the all-new episode of GS-CGP!!!

Aye! Since our last episode, a bunch of questions have popped up: like, why Mayoi's Devil Fruit contradicts the Laws of Devil Fruit Users, and why the Straw Hats have suddenly arrived to challenge the Objection Pirates to a Davy Back Fight! Alright, First Mate Kyle! Let's get on with the show!

*Salutes* Aye, Cap'n Derek!

One Current, Onboard Ship 1:

You... You can't be serious-ttebayo!!!

Yeah! You're the Straw Hats... Why would you wanna challenge US to a Davy Back Fight?

Yeah! We didn't even do anything wrong!

Aww, come on! It'll be fun!

... Fun?

Yep! I've been in a lot of Davy Back Fights now... and since this is the Pirate Treasure Hunt and all...

You wanna have a Pirate Fight, too-ttebayo?

YEAH!!! Besides... You've got a Devil Fruit, too, right?

Now that you mention it...

MAYOI!!! YOU CAN'T SERIOUSLY BE THINKING OF FIGHTING LUFFY, RIGHT?!

Aww, but he said it would be fun!

No! *Turns to Luffy* Sorry, Luffy, but we're gonna have to decline.

No, I decline.

...

...

... You decline what?

I decline your decline!

That sounds SOOOO familiar...

Well I say we start! *Signals his crewmates to go and leave one of the Mini-Merry boats* I'll meet you guys at the big whirlpool! Go on and catch up to the other ships!

Yessir!

*The Thousand Sunny leaves one of the Mini-Merry boats and heads off.*

N-NO WAI!!! THEY'RE CHASING THE OTHER SHIPS?!

So THAT's what the sudden Davy Back Fight request was for!

ALL RIGHT!!! LET'S GET THIS STARTED-TTEBAYO!!!

YOU SAID IT!!!

This... can't be happening...

Mayoi's seriously gonna fight Luffy...

She'll get owned, I tell you.

*Snores*

*Super Close-Up* MIZU MIZU NO MI!!!

*Super Close-Up* GOMU GOMU NO MI!!!

*Luffy and Mayoi begin to fight.*

...

One Current, Onboard Ship 2:

*Still tied to the mast* Mm-hmm... Yup!

Did you find anything, Godot-san?

Analyzing... IT'S OVER NINE THOUSAAAAAAAND!!!

Over Nine Thousand?!

What is?

It's... a sandbar. And it's 10 000 centimeters away from the ship!

*Godot looks down.*

YOU! MITSURUGI! STEER TO THE LEFT, FOOL!!!

Aye, Cap—

*Mitsurugi stops.*

Wait a minute! You're not the Captain! You can't boss ME around, Godot!

And why not?

Because... Juugo's retarded— I mean! Because... It's unfair?

Nope. No it isn't. That's my rule.

*Getting angry* OH YEAH? SCREW YOUR RULE! I HAVE A CRAVAT!!!

... Well, I have a visor.

& *<Insert cliché animé Rival Eye Beams here.>*

GUYS!!! STOP FIGHTING ALREADY!!!

Just steer the ship to the left!

No!

I'm telling you, you NEED to steer—

NO!!!

& MITSURUGI-SAN, JUST STEER IT TO THE LEFT ALREADY!!!

What, you guys, too? Why does everybody love Godot, damn it?!

MITSURUGI-SAN!!! STEER, DAMN IT, STEER!!! LOOK BEHIND YOU!!!

*Mitsurugi finally looks behind him and sees... A GIANT SANDBAR!!!*

GAHH!!! *Frantically turns the wheel*

No, your other left—!!!

CRIIIIEEEEEEEAAAAAASSSHH!!!

*... Looks like the Fire Pirates... crashed onto a sandbar...*

Oww... My head...

*Odoroki looks around.*

Hey! Is everybody okay?

... My Luminol Fluid cushioned my fall.

I'm okay 'cuz I'm Godot.

Okay then... How about you, Mitsurugi-san?

...

Mitsurugi-san?

...

...

*Jumps up and screams in agony* PAAAAAAIIIIN!!!! OWW, I JUST LANDED ON SOMETHING REALLY HARD!!!

Aww, you whiner! *Picks Mitsurugi up and checks what he landed on* What the...

*Godot reveals the item that made Mitsurugi scream in pain: a red, stopwatch-ish Tamagotchi thing.*

What is it?

I dunno. I CAN'T SEE IT.

*Looks at the item* Oh, I see. That's because it's... uh, the opposite of blue.

It looks like a stopwatch... or a Tamagotchi...

Well, that's really not important right now.

Huh?

*Points to Ship 2, which is stuck in the sand and has a broken mast* Check that out.

... Aww, man... *Turns to Godot* Shipwright Godot! Can you do anything about that?

Souryuu can, Godot can't.

But... That makes no sense...

True, but it's my rule.

*Slumps down on the sand* We're dead!

...

En route to Whirl Giant, Onboard Ship 1:

HIYAA!!!

*Luffy throws an extended punch at Mayoi, who evades it with a water-based attack.*

Haha! Nice try-ttebayo! It'll take more than THAT to bring ME down! *Jumps up on the mast*

*Also jumps up on the mast* Don't be so confident! I'm gonna be future Pirate King, so I'm SURE I beat you easy!

*Laughs* Oh yeah? MIZU MIZU NO STORM!!!

GOMU GOMU NO STORM!!!

*Both Luffy and Mayoi exchange multiple blows.*

Haha! is that the best you can do-ttebayo?

Hahaha! Nope!

*Luffy gets into position.*

... GOMU GOMU NO JET!!!

Ahh!!! MIZU MIZU NO JET!!!

*Mayoi and Luffy exchange simultaneous blows again.*

This... This is unbelievable! Their attacks are almost identical!

Not just that... But their personalities...

P-Personalities...?

*Nods* Both Luffy and Mayoi are hyperactive and like to get into things head-first... Maybe that's why their attacks are almost exactly the same!

But their Devil Fruits are different! ... And Mayoi's Devil Fruit doesn't even make any sense because she should've been swallowed by the sea already—!

*About to crash* WATCH OUT-TTEBAYO!!!

AAAAAAAAARRRGGGHH!!!

*Mayoi almost crashes into Naruhodou, but manages to grab onto one of Luffy's rubber arms.*

... Then again, Mayoi getting swallowed by the sea wouldn't be so bad—

*Cold stare* Come again?

GAAAHH!!! CREEPY CHINAMI STARE!!! STOP IT, CHIHIRO-SENSEI!!!

*Sees Mayoi grabbing onto his arm* H-Hey!

Gotcha now! *Throws a punch at Luffy*

*Gets hit* Ow... Man, you're punches... They remind me of... ME!

Really?

Haha! Distracted you! *Returns Mayoi's punch*

Not so fast! MIZU MIZU NO CANNON!!!

*Mayoi summons a huge wave of water, shapes it into a giant canonball, and throws it at Luffy. Luffy is hit and crashes into the barrel of pickles adjacent to where Hobohodo's sleeping.*

*Snores*

WHOA!!!

Impossible!

MAYOI... ACTUALLY BEAT LUFFY?!

You mean... I won? Really? That's all it took-ttebayo?

Wait! Mayoi!

*Mayoi looks behind her and sees Luffy... still standing!*

...

*Smiles* You're a lot better than I thought you'd be! In fact, you were AWESOME!!!

... Uh... *Smiles* Thanks! Dattebayo!

(WHAT?! What the hell is going on here?!)

(Is the fight... really over?)

*Snores*

But... No matter how good you are...

*Super Close-Up* I can't lose to you.

H-Huh?

This has been real fun and all... You beat me up real bad, that's what... But if I don't win, I won't get stronger... And if I don't get stronger...

...

I won't be able to protect my nakama.

So... What're you gonna do-ttebayo?

I'm gonna do the only thing I can do... All of my techniques... Will develop as one!

NARUTTEBAYO?!

*Enters Gear Second* Hahaha! You can't keep up with me now! I'll be sure to win! Gear... Second!!!

...

En route to Whirl Giant, Onboard Ship 3:

... Are we there yet?

*Uses telescope* Lemme check... Oh! Whirlpool Ho!

Really? We're near the giant blender? Lemme see, please!

*Kyouya lends Harumi the telescope.*

Oh, wow! It's so big...

And on the other side of it... Is Two Current!

And after that... We'll be on the current that leads to the island: Three Current!

Let's hurry up and cross that whirly thing, Kyouya-san!

Aye, Captain!

Hmph. I don't see why you foolishly foolish fools are all gawking like idiots at that whirlpool... It looks like a giant toilet to me!

(If it were, I wish YOU would get flushed down it, Karuma-san... You've done nothing but whine and complain ever since we cast off!)

WHAT DID YOU SAY?! *Whips Kyouya*

OWW!!! I DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING!!!

I READ YOUR MIND, FOOLISHLY FOOLISH ROCK STAR FOOL!!!

*Sighs* Poor Kyouya-kun...

Want me to summon Kirio-san again, Minuki-chan?

*Somewhere near the bow of the ship... A strange shadow climbs up the robe ladder.*

??? 5 *On a boat below the rope ladder* Well? Is this the right ship?

??? 6 *Peeps at the deck* ... Yup!

??? 5 Good!

??? 6 ... Hey, can I ask you a question?

??? 5 Huh? Yeah... What is it?

??? 6 Why do I have to be the one on this rope ladder?!

??? 5 Duh... Isn't it obvious? It's because you're the smallest!

??? 6 Grr... So, do I ambush them now?

??? 5 ... We still need to wait for the signal. Don't be too impatient!

...

Sandbar on One Current:

*Sighs* This is hopeless... We might as well get ourselves eliminated now...

We're stuck on this sandbar...

And our ship's damaged...

And we have a Shipwright who can't even fix it...

& *Sigh* Such is life...

I'm telling you, it was all Godot's fault!

MY FAULT? You can't even tell right from left!

*Mitsurugi and Godot argue again.*

*Sighs* And we've got two crewmates who won't stop fighting...

*Picks up the weird item* ... Oh, well... At least we've got some form of entertainment while we're here... I think.

*Odoroki turns the device on.*

You really think you should be playing with—

*Electric guitar music suddenly plays. The device begins to glow.*

WHAT THE?!

W-Why is that device glowing?

More importantly... Where is that music coming from?!

Device: Nigetari akirameru koto wa daremo... Isshun areba dekiru kara arukitsuzukeyou! Kimi ni shika dekinai koto ga aru aoi hoshi ni... Hikari ga nakusenu you ni!

Wait. I know that theme! ... I don't believe it!

Device: Tsukame! Egaita yume wo... Mamore! Daiji na tomo wo... Takumashii jibun ni nareru sa!
Shiranai pawaa ga yadoru haato ni hi ga tsuitara... Donna negai mo uso ja nai, kitto kanau kara...

GABUMON DIGIVOLUTION!!!

Device: Show me your brave heart!

*A large wolf-like creature suddenly emerges from the device.*

GARURUMON!!!

WOW!!! IT WAS A DIGIVICE!!! ... AND LOOK AT THAT AWESOME DIGIMON!!!

...

Oh, wow! It's HUUUUUGE!!!

I bet 10 people could fit on that Garurumon's back!

Yeah! ... Yeah...

*Odoroki turns to his crewmates.*

I think... I've found a way to get us outta here.

...

Whirl Giant, Onboard Ship 3:

*Looks at the whirpool* Wow! Look at that swirling vortex of water, fear, terror, and the dreams of all ships and their crews who passed by here, drowning eternally and forever sunken in this deep, dark abyss of doom...

& ... Did you just recite a macabre freeverse poem?

What does "muh-cobb" mean?

... Never mind.

We finally got to the whirlpool, Whirl Giant! Now all we have to do is cross it and follow Two Current!

Well hurry up and cross it already! I grow bored of this foolishness!

(Must... resist... urge... to push... Karuma-san... offboard...)

*Ship 3 maneuvers its way through the whirlpool.*

All right! This'll be a bumpy ride, so hold on!!!

*The ship begins to rock as it enters the whirlpool.*

Ugh... Motion sickness....

Uh-oh! Kyouya-kun! I think Karuma-san's gonna hurl!

... I don't wanna look...

*Face turns green* I... I...

(Aww, and I just swabbed the deck, too!)

*Uses her whip to crab onto the main mast* Hmph! Me? Karuma Mei? Seasick? Hilarious!!! You are so foolishly foolish, Garyuu Kyouya!!! Maaaaahahaha!!!

(Nice to see you've developed a Tin-Plate Wapol laugh there...)

We're heading into the center!!! Just one more centrifugal force push and we're on Two Current!

Wheeeeeeee!!! Swirling around is so fun!!!

*Below deck...*

??? 6 Ugh... I feel sick!

??? 5 *Gulps* Me too! ... Okay, I think we should ambush them now!!!

*The two figures jump onboard*

??? 5 Hey there! We've come to challenge you to a Davy Back Fight!

??? 6 That's right!

Huh? And who are you supposed to be?

*The figures remove their masks.*

I'm Tony Tony Chopper!

And you can call me Nami! Mm-hmm!

& We're members of the Straw Hat Pirates!!!

... You've gotta be kidding me.

Whoa! So THAT's where Nami and Chopper were! No wonder they weren't with Luffy!

Yeah... But I wonder where Robin and Franky are... And also, why are Mayoi and Luffy's attacks so identical? Even though Mayoi's got an insanely weird Devil Fruit that apparently defies the Laws of Devil Fruit Users in One Piece... It's weird! Could it be... "THE WILL OF D."?!

"The Will of D."! Yeah! That's pretty likely! Anyways... Let's just find out next time on...

& THE GYAKUTEN SAIBAN CHARACTER GRAND PRIX!!!

... TO BE CONTINUED.


P.S. Hey, CI, if you need a smilie that can represent me whenever you feel like releasing your anger on me in your funnies, here you go. Okay, it's not exactly me... It's Griff, but meh. :/

---

Thanks, but I'm not angry at you at all, even if you do abuse Maya in your funnies. It's all in good fun, mate, and if you ever feel like roasting me, look no further than the Yuusaku smilie.

---

Many people in many places have wondered, what would it be like if I was in other game genres. Now, I have worked with Elias here to put me into other genres.
(me) Now, without thurther waiting, I now present Bloodmoon Castle's latest production:
PHOENIX WRIGHT IN OTHER GENRES!
----puzzle----
WHAT A...? Why am I stuck in an L shape.
*Humming Tetris theme*
----RPG----
Wait, why am I in court if I'm in an RPG?
Will the witness please give us their testimony?
Yes, I will.

Well, first me and Nick introduced the joke, then I sent him to a few games, and now he's in RPG land. *You see green lettering appear above his head with the words 15 EXP.*
Mr. Wright, you may now begin your Cross Examination.

There's no way he's going to get anywhere. My bluff skill is way higher then his sense motive.
You only took me to one game so far, not counting here.
ARGH!
To be continued.

---

What if...time travel was invented in 2025.

- Ok, we all know that Gant is hiding something in his office so I'm going there. 'bye.
- See you in court.
- Aw, can't we stay in his office for longer *exit phoenix and ema*
- Ok, let's see here...
*insert time travel-y sounds here*
- Hello there, Miles.
- Wait, who are..Ema? What the Hell are you doing here and how come you've just aged by about 9 ye-
- Shhh, keep it down. Let me take that cravat off you...

-Meanwhile-

- Hey, Phoenix, didn't you just hear a thump from Edgeworths office.
- I did. I'm going to check it out. Ok, I see-

- What is it, Phoenix.
- ...let's just say, some things never change.

Last edited by TheDarkArchon on Thu Apr 12, 2007 9:49 pm, edited 1 time in total.

: This is the greatest and best song in the world. . . tribute.
Long time ago me and my brother Kyle here ( ),...
we was hitchhikin' down a long and lonesome road.
All of a sudden,
there shined a shiny demon...
in the middle...
of the road.
And he said:

: Play the best song in the world,
or I'll eat your souls

:Well me and Kyle,... we looked at each other,
and we each said...




(Phoenix Wrong)

@Al: OMG! IT'S DIGIMON! *squeals* Nobody saw that! I think I just became your best fan for it too! *bows down*

@eliasbloodmoon: I think I just got some idea from you. May I use your Phoenix Wright in the Wrong theme for a funny?

You will see this on all of my posts. I used this account when I was 13-14 and some of the content I am not happy about. I am sorry to anyone who read my posts and was rightfully offended by any of it. I will likely not use this website again, just FYI.

Last edited by Wizard Anon on Thu Apr 15, 2021 3:50 am, edited 1 time in total.

Go ahead.

---

You will see this on all of my posts. I used this account when I was 13-14 and some of the content I am not happy about. I am sorry to anyone who read my posts and was rightfully offended by any of it. I will likely not use this website again, just FYI.

Last edited by Wizard Anon on Thu Apr 15, 2021 3:49 am, edited 1 time in total.

Time for more Digimon— I mean, time for more... GYAKUTEN SAIBAN CHARACTER GRAND PRIX!!!

Hey there, folks! Welcome back to GS-CGP!

Previously on our show, we saw how Mayoi put her Devil Fruit powers to the test... by fighting none other than Captain Monkey D. Luffy himself! Apparently, Mayoi and Luffy have an almost identical Attack Set... Not to mention personality!

That's right! And that actually made Derek and I think... Could Mayoi possess... "The Will of D."?

Indeed! It seems so weird... How Mayoi's almost exactly like Luffy, just like how Luffy's personality is just like that of everyone with the middle initial "D"!

Ah, but that's not all we witnessed last time, right? We saw the Fire Pirates crash into a sandbar... But they made up for it by summoning GARURUMON!!! That's right... GARURUMON!!!

Yeah! And don't forget... the whirlpool! Previously, the Glasses Pirates entered the Whirl Giant, the large whirpool separating One Current from Two Current... And upon doing so... They ended up getting challenged by Tony Tony Chopper and Nami!

Now let's see what'll happen!

Whirl Giant, Onboard Ship 3:

So, do you accept our challenge?

...

Hey! I asked you a question!

...

...

...

...

... WHAT FOOLISHLY FOOLISH FOOLISHNESS IS THIS?! A... A TALKING REINDEER?! I... I... DATTEBAYO!!!

Oh, my...

Ka-Ka-Karuma-san!

She... She said...

KARUMA MEI ACTUALLY SAID "DATTEBAYO"?! ... THAT'S... THAT'S JUST... NO WAI!!!

... What?

That's so friggen out-of-character!

Yeah! Usually, it's Mayoi-san who says that! Her, and...

"Dattebayo!"

That person!

Hmph! What is this foolishly foolish whining all for, then? I was merely surprised that a foolishly foolish reindeer with the abnormally and foolishly hideous blue nose spoke to ME!

Hey! Mean person!

Well, you gotta admit... That outburst WAS pretty damn out-of-character—

KA-WHIP!!!

SILENCE!!!

OWW!!!

... I swear this is wasting our time.

Yeah! Hey, you big damn meanie! What's your response to our challenge—

DOUBLE KA-WHIP!!!

Oh, you want some more?! HERE!!! Have some more! Feel my whip! Foolishly foolish fools! The whiplash burns, yes?

AAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIYYYYYYEEEEEEEEHHH!!!!!! IT HUUUUUUURRTS!!!

*Chopper faints from Mei's excessive whipping.*

Chopper!

*Nami springs up on Mei and grabs her whip.*

Wha...

I suppose that annoying whipping means that you accept our challenge?

... Why you... You fool! HOW DARE YOU SNATCH MY WHIP WHEN I AM IN THE MIDDLE OF TORTURING A FURRY WOODLAND CREATURE WITH IT?!

Stop complaining! If you want your whip back, you're gonna have to fight ME for it!

... I ACCEPT YOUR CHALLENGE!

*Mei and Nami prepare to fight.*

O lawd, I smell fanservice coming.

...

En Route to Whirl Giant, Onboard Ship 1:

Gear... Second!!!

*Luffy enters Gear Second.*

Wha... WHAT'S GOING ON-TTEBAYO?!

Mayoi! Luffy's entering Gear Second! RUN AWAY AS FAST AS YOU CAN!!!

Huh? Did you say something, sis?

HE'S RIGHT BEHIND YOU!!!

What?! *Turns around*

*Charges at Mayoi* HAAAAAAAHH!!!

AHH!!!

*Luffy punches Mayoi with unbelievable speed.*

MIZU MIZU NO MACHINE GUN!!!

*Mayoi turns her arms into water and tries to hit Luffy to slow him down... but she fails!*

*Avoiding blows* Nope! Sorry, but that's not gonna work!

*Luffy throws another series of punches at Mayoi, who is unable to block all of them because of Gear Second's speed-enhancing abilities.*

... DAMN IT-TTEBAYO!!! MIZU MIZU NO STORM!!!

*Mayoi performs Mizu Mizu no Storm again and hits Luffy! Gear Second's temporary effects have gone!*

*Pants* Hehe... You're not that fast now-ttebayo!

*Also pants* ... I'm almost out of energy... *Smiles* You know, you really are good at this! Maybe... You're even good enough to become Pirate King— I mean, "Queen"!

Hehe...

But... I still won't lose to you!

W-What?

Luffy STILL wants to fight?

Why is he so intent on winning, anyway?!

*Snores*

You... You can't!

When I joined this contest thing... I knew there'd be a lot of interesting people to meet! ... And I knew that those people were gonna be real strong, too! It's an awesome challenge! If I beat at least one, I'll be a better pirate!

...

*Smiles* Captain Mayoi... *Points at her* I demanded this Davy Back Fight... I hae a goal to accomplish! I WILL WIN!!!

...

*Puts his thumb to his mouth* Gear...

*Luffy blows air into his arm and it quadruples in size!!!*

ACK!!! IT CAN'T BE...

GEAR THIRD?!

*Raises his giant arm* This... Is... One of my ultimate forms!!!

IT'S THE ARM OF A GIANT!!!

GEAR THIRD!!!

*Luffy gives Mayoi a heavily damaging blow.*

AAAAAAAARRGGHH!!! ... MIZU... MI— *Faints*

*Mayoi falls to the floor in defeat. Luffy shrinks for a while, but returns to normal a few moments later.*

MAYOI!!!

*Chihiro and Naruhodou rush to the spot where Mayoi fainted.*

... Still alive...

*Chihiro turns to Luffy.*

WHY DID YOU DO THIS?!

My goal...

What, your goal to become Pirate King?! What you did isn't like you at all! Crocodile was right... "The closer you get to the Grand Line... The more your dreams disappear!" Isn't that right?

Um...

Well?

...

... Luffy?

*Sheepish look* We're not in the Grand Line!

...

...

*Punches Luffy* YOU IDIOT!!! THAT WAS A METAPHOR!!!

*Clenches jaw* Oww!!!

Actually, it wasn't a metaphor; more like a simile—

*Glares at Naruhodou* Maybe you should attach a zipper to your mouth like Fukurou of CP9?

AHH!!! OKAY, OKAY!!! I'M STAYING SILENT!!!

Hey! What was that for? I was only trying to accomplish my goal!

Oh, what shallow reasons—

No! That's not it! The reason I HAD to defeat Captain Mayoi... Is because I need to save someone.

& WHAT?!

The only way I can save him is by taking your crew's Hidden Key!

What Hidden Key?!

...

En Route to Whirl Giant, Onboard... GARURUMON?!:

*Swimming in the sea* We're only a few miles away from Whirl Giant, Odoroki-sama!

Thanks a lot for the ride, Garurumon!

No problem! You were the one who summoned me here, after all!

Now we can finally catch up!

Who knew your idea would actually work, Odoroki?

*Rubs the back of his head* Ehehe... I'm just good with Digimon, Akane-chan!

Well, I certainly didn't think this would work! Good job, Captain!

You don't think at all, Mitsurugi.

... Shouldn't you be insulting Naruhodou?

He's not here, and since you're Maruhodou's best friend, I'll make fun of you instead!

*Getting pissed* Yeah, if you can even see me! *Does John Cena wave*

I can see PINK just fine, Mitsurugi.

... Freak you, Dahlia!

MY ENGLISH NAME'S NOT DAHLIA, DAMN IT!!!

& *<Insert Eye Beams here.>*

*Sigh* Too bad I wasn't able to make those two stop fighting...

*Shrugs* Mysteries of life. Even science can't solve them!

*Odoroki leans forward to talk to Garurumon.*

So, Garurumon... How'd your Digivice end up here, anyway?

I really don't know, Odoroki-sama... All I remember was that I was a Wild Digimon before you summoned me, and that I was with three other Digimon who got sent here.

Three others?

I dunno what happened to them... One was a Guilmon who befriended a human, but got sent here... You know, there are a lot of dangers in the sea! I just hope the others are okay!

You know... If you really wanna find those other Digimon...

*Cuts in* NO. Odoroki, we are NOT getting sidetracked! We have to be the first ones to get to the island. We don't have time to chase after Digimon—!

IGIARI!!! *Points to Akane* No way! Garurumon's helping us get to Whirl Giant because certain people crashed our ship onto a sandbar!

*Whistles innocently*

*Whistles Godot - Fragrance of Dark Coffee*

... Show-off!

... Anyway! We've gotta repay Garurumon somehow! *Turns to Garurumon* And we'll do that by finding the other Digimon!

You'd do that for me? Thank you, Odoroki-sama!

ODOROKI!!! YOU CAN'T... WE'LL GET DISQUALIFIED—!

I'M THE CAPTAIN, HOUDZUKI AKANE!!! YOU HAVE TO DO WHAT I SAY!!!

...

*Awkward silence...*

Did... Did Captain Odoroki just... call Akane by her full name?!

Damn, that's... odd!

Man, couples sure are weird!

... I'll just keep swimming, just keep swimming...

...

Two Current, Onboard Ship 3:

PREPARE TO TASTE DEFEAT!!! *Charges at Nami*

Prepare to taste my Perfect Clima-Tact!!! *Raises the Perfect Clima-Tact*

"PERFECT" CLIMA-TACT?! HA!!! IF ANYONE'S PERFECT, IT'S ME, FOOL!

*Gets a bag of pork rinds from nowhere and eats* LET THE FANSERVICE BEGIN!!!

*Slaps Kyouya* Hey! Don't be a pervert!

Oops... Sorry, Minuki-chan!

Perfection Snacth!!! *Snatches her whip back*

MIRAGE TEMPO FATA MORGANA!!!

Morgan-a?

*Nami makes illusory clones of herself and confuses Mei.*

What the...

Hehehe!

Foolishly foolish clones!!!

Thunder Tempo!!!

*Nami summons a cloud and a lightningbolt appears. Mei is hit!*

AAAAAAARRGGGHH!!! FOOLISH THUNDERBOLT!!!

Give up yet?

Hmph! You wish!

*Mei prepares to attack.*

Perfection Whiplash!!! *Whips Nami*

AAAAAHH!!!

Whoa...

Kyouya-kun!

I mean... Oh...

Hey! How come everybody's ignoring the reindeer?

*Still unconscious*

...

Ooh, looks like the Mei-Nami Fight's gonna be a good one! ... And I'm not just saying that because of the sheer fanservice, folks!

Speaking of fights, I wonder why Luffy said that he HAD to win against Mayoi? He even used Gear Third just to do so! And... what's this about a Hidden Key in Ship 1? Will Mayoi regain consciousness?

Where are the other Digimon that Garurumon was with? Why did Odoroki suddenly snap at Akane?

Did they break up? Were they ever together?

Why are Godot and Mitsurugi acting so immature? And... Why is Hobohodo still asleep? Find out next time on...

& THE GYAKUTEN SAIBAN CHARACTER GRAND PRIX!!!

... TO BE CONTINUED.

---

GS3 has been scheduled for release outside Japan.
Can you repeat that? Woops! (Falls down stairs)
Splendiferous!
Darn weather girl! She said TaT would be GS4!!
w00t!! now j00 see HAWT lawshool ^.^ ROFD!!!
I resent that.
yay! Do stuff, Mia!
*WHIP!*
I went to the future and got Franziska's whip.
How far did you go into the future?
OUT!!
(Everyone leaves.)
You can come out now, Lana.
Greetings, my close colleague.
You too, future Ema.
Aha! Aha! Aha!

---

Oh, Niiiiiiick…

What?

I see how bored you are… I know exactly how we can fix that little problem…

Really? (I was bored?)

(moving towards Phoenix’s bedroom) Ooooh… are you thinking what I’m thinking?

I think so… (Wait, what's going on?)

Then come to bed…

Bed? Why would we need a bed to play Pictionary?

Pictionary? (What's gotten over you, Nick?)

Pictionary! It’s my favourite game! Mia used to play it with me all the time! She always seemed to want to play it in the bedroom too but my table is out here so we used it instead.

Fine then. Pictionary it is. (Guess he doesn't love me anymore...)

Yaaaa...WAITAMINUTE! DID I JUST SAY I WANTED TO PLAY PICTIONARY INSTEAD OF HAVE SEX WITH MAYA?

So, we are not going to play Pictionary?

Are you kidding!? I don't even like Pictionary! Come to the bedroom, my dear, for I have something wonderful in store for you!

Of course, my darling Nicky-kins! *Kisses Phoenix*

*On the way to the bedroom* I don't know what came over me Maya. I knew you wanted to make love to me, but instead, for some reason, I felt like playing pictionary.

You know, Nick? I have this strange feeling this has all been done before...

*Later on*
----

You’re a baaaaad little prosecutor, aren’t you? You needed to be tied up and whipped.

…

SAY IT!

-sigh- Yes, Mistress Franziska.

Good boy.



If I may interrupt…

What is it? I’m a busy woman!

Now, the leather and the whipping I can understand. Some people like that stuff. The bondage fetish is fine too. But out of curiosity, WHY THE HELL ARE YOU DOING THIS IN MY HOUSE? (And where did Maya go? And why is this all too familiar?)

Your house was easiest.

And the tying me to a chair and forcing me to watch?

Less easy, more kinky.

But you…

Why are you still talking? Do you want to get whipped?

No, Franziska.

AHEM.

No, MISTRESS Franziska.

Then shut up.

(However, I am still having this weird feeling I'm living in a repeat of a previous day...)

AND NO THOUGHTS EITHER! Don't think I can't see that blue text there, Mr. I am still having this weird feeling I'm living in a repeat of a previous day...

(Ohh God-Fucking Dammit!)

*Later on*
---

(singing cheerily) Slicing, slicing, slice away the vein, distract myself from the emotional pain!

(opens door) Agh!

Ack! Wright!

What the hell are you doing?

Not cutting myself in a completely imaginary attempt to express my nonexistent emotional pain in an illusory physical form?

…

…

AHA, I'VE FIGURED IT OUT!

Figured what out?

Now I know why I've been having a feeling of deja-vu all day. It's because these events were actually the first Phoenix Wright Funnies ever recorded. The only difference is that it was remastered with extra smilies for modern effect. In short: Chinese Infantry is a ripoff artist.

No, I'm giving a preview for my latest product. "The Oldschool Phoenix Wright Funnies: Remastered!" All of your favorite funnies from the old Court Records forums remastered with new smilies and other shiny feature. Selling right now for only $49.99!

....Right, while you are being a sellout, Maya and I are going off to my bedroom!

Ooooh, is it what I think it is, Nicky-kins?

Of course, my love, of course! *Kisses Maya*

---

---

You will see this on all of my posts. I used this account when I was 13-14 and some of the content I am not happy about. I am sorry to anyone who read my posts and was rightfully offended by any of it. I will likely not use this website again, just FYI.

Last edited by Wizard Anon on Thu Apr 15, 2021 3:49 am, edited 1 time in total.

I think this out-weird's Mia Fey's funny... that's no complimant.

: Hey cutie!

: Very nice, how much?

: And you are...

: Borat Sagdiyev, hige five!

: *high fives*

: May I have sexy-time with this prostitute?

: Oh, she's no prosti-

: Oh! It's a shame. It's just that back in Kazakhstan, men would want her very much...

: ...

: Her... Not so much.

"Borat: The Gyakuten Saiban chronicles" Borat adventures into the world of Gyakuten Saiban. Since it is Borat, it will be funny and you will shell out 6 easy payments of $19.99 for it!

You please to buy movie I make in world of spiky hair liar!

HOW DARE YOU CALL MY NICKY-KINS A LIAR, YOU KAZAKHSTANI!

(Geez, how many more sellouts until this joke becomes overused?)

---

Last edited by Chinese Infantry on Sun Apr 15, 2007 11:01 am, edited 1 time in total.

It's overused already and I only read one!

*tazers everyone*

---

: So, have you found a contradiction in this testimony?

: Yes, I have...

: ...

: ...

: ...

: ...

: ...Get on wit-

: NOT!




This made me laugh to tears!

Ahhh that's it!! That's Pudding's funnies in the old CR forun!!

XD

Phoenix Wrong scene, perhaps? XD

---

Since when did we have a Borat smiley?

---

It's user-linked from their Photobucket, like the :9000!: exclamation I asked about four or five pages ago.

: That's not how you prostitutes do real sexy-time!

: Excuse me!?

: Why don't you two jump on my cock?

: We really don't wa-

: What's the matter baby-face? Don't you want me to make romance-explosion on your stomach?

: Seriously, can you lea-

: Now listen, pussy-cat. Why don't you smile a bit?

: That's it, we're leaving.

: Borat: The Gyakuten Saiban chronicles. Borat adventures into the world of Gyakuten Saiban...

: ...don't dress like that, you should be put in jail...

: ...ye-

: High five!

NNNIIIICCCKKKK!!!
what!
NNNIIIICCCKKKK!!!
what is it Maya.....
NNNNIIIIIICCCCCKKKK!!!!
GOD DAMN IT!!! WHAT THE *beep* Do YOU WANT YOU S*beep*T B*beep*H. CAN YOU GET THE F*beep* AWAY FROM ME!!!!
Whhaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!! You screamed at me!!!*sniff* I wanted to say hi......
Oh come here Maya! *kisses*
I feel better Nicky!
*insert hardcore porn scene here* *Chinese Infantry video taping it*
Alone time!!!

Any one wants Uncle Gant's milkshakes!! Wrighto is making his!
Me me uncle Gant!!
bend over!
Banana ice cream never felt so good!!
*Phoenix and Maya come out naked*
PEARLY!!! We're telling Morgan!!
Wahhhhhhh!!!!!!!! What did I doooooo.....Im telling mom that you did things to each other!! *runs*
Get back here!!!


*DBZ music plays* Will Pearl tell Morgan? Will Phoenix and Maya's relationship go smoothly? Will CI stop taping this? Find out in the next episode of Phoenix Wright: Embarrassing Outakes!!

---