LOL'D SO HARD.

...Borat! Oh lawd, best movie evar. :D


Anyways:


*surfs the internet, gets an IM*

HOTCHICK281: a/s/l bebe?

... 24/m/ca

HOTCHICK281: 16/F/CALI OMG WE SHUD TTLY MEAT !!

Well, I do need a new assistant..


SEVERAL DAYS LATER:

*sits in the park and waits in designated spot*

...Wrighto?

...Ch-Cheif Gant?!

...Well this certainly is strange! I'm supposed to meet someone here. From the internet. Oho!

Actually, me too.. From.. the internet.

...

...

...... Do you like swimming, my boy?



[I think this was only funny in my sleep-deprived head. ):]

---

*Crapping noise*

_________________________


Hi I'm Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney. I defend the innocent by day...


But by night when the moon is full......


Ghaharahgrahaagragaraaagagaragrgraaggagagagragagrarga!!!!!!


Grrrrrrrr


Hooooooooooooooooooooooooowwwwwwwwwllllllll!!!!!


And that's how I became a hobo!


Wright you're not a hobo. You just got drunk and trashed my office again ruining my romantic evening with..... um....


With who?


*Wearing only a towel* Hey Edgey that's a great shower you got back there!

---

XD THAT WAS AWESOME!

---

Hmmmmmmmmm......


Something wrong detective?


Well I'm stuck on this impossible puzzle on my copy of "Twighlight Princess" it's just so hard.


Really? Let me see that. I was a wiz at the old Atari you know.


...


... I'll make some calls.


Well I'm stumped.


Same here.


It's too hard...


Guys! I did some scientific research and it turns out that you press "A" and "B" at the same time.


...


...


...


...


...


Yea I thought it was stupid to...

---

Finally continuing.
----dating sim----
I thought Phoenic Wright had already covered this area.
I don't see why you're complaining. You're the main character.
*Her head pops up from between Nick's legs* You know, he's got a point.
Less talkie, more blowie.
Oops. Sorry. *Head goes back down*
--------
Dang it. I can't think of any other genres.
Hey, at least you haven't been dragged into one of CI's guy's in a hottub skits and forced to look like an idiot. (Just joking. I'm a / fanboy too.)
Hey guys.
& AAAAAHHHHHH!

---

Boston Legal
He's mocking me. Dad, he's mocking me!
You're an Edgeworth. Get used to it.

Motion for continuance is denied.
You know what I'm going to do, Brian, just to show you there are no hard feelings? I'm going to sleep with your wife.

Alright already, I've heard enough. I'm going to rule on this.
You can't rule yet!
Why not?
I don't know.

Did my client tell you that this drug is unapproved by the FDA?
Yes.
Did he tell you that, ah, there could be side effects?
Yes.
You were fully informed.
I was.
You consented.
I did.
Take it again?
Absolutely.
Like the doctor?
Love him.
How's your memory?
My memory's fine.
What's my name?
Phoenix Wright
Like you mean it!
Phoenix Wright!
What's my name?
Phoenix Wright!!
No further questions.

You know we have a little saying in Massachusetts, "Maybe someday you'll get horribly sick and die."

Until then!
Oh!
You. You dog.
Ah...

100 women there, and you didn't invite me. That's 200 breasts! And you kept them all to yourself.

You just gave me an idea (but wait until the next episode)

---

A excerpt from my Turnabout News Room. (following written by me)

In philosophical news, I just farted. Back to you Lana.

---

Head of Capcom: Well, Elias, we need a new TV show.
So, why are you asking me?
HoC: I just needed someone to pitch my ideas to.
You do now I only do PW, right.
HoC: *Completely ignoring* OK, how about a soap opera of Devil May Cry: Devils of our Lives.
Nope.
HoC: How about Resident Evil: Survivor. We take a bunch of real life special ops agents, get them stuck on an island with a bunch of zombies, and see what happens.
You know, I have an idea. How about we take characters from Phoenix Wright and force them to live in one house together. Kind of a...Big Brother: PW edition.
HoC: Brilliant idea! Glad I thought of it.
Uhuh. Let's go with that.
Coming soon to Turnabout Channel.

---

From Decline of Video Gaming 3, right?

---

Maya, we haven't had a client in weeks. I'm seriously thinking of hanging up my Lawyer's Badge...

But... but why!?

I don't know, I know I'm good, but what's the use if I can't even live like this. That's it, I'm starting a rap career. Tell me what you think of this :

Mic check one two...
What up with choo
Mah rhymes gon' cut through

Um... Phoenix, Maya ran away from her body by summoning me.

Don't interrupt me Mia, I'm on a roll here.

Comin straight outta' the courthouse
Crack open a forty just ta get soused
Don't serve no time 'cause the law is my bitch
Make her scratch my back when I have an itch

NIIIIICK! STOP THIS! IT'S HORRIBLE! I...I'M GOING TO DIE!

I have to agree with Larry. It's horrible

What are you people doing here!? This is my office! Mine! See what it says on the door!? Wright & Co. Law Offices! Not Edgeworth & Co. Law Offices! Get out! I'm becoming a musical genius here!

Prosecutors rise up to get beat down
And they all gon die when I yell OBJECTION!

That's it pal! You're comin' with me!

What for!?

I don't know yet, but the entire city of Los Angeles got restraining orders against you! Tupac Shakur came back from the dead just to call you a honky! The NWA reformed to try and give some street cred back to the west coast! YOU'VE SINGLE-HANDEDLY DESTROYED THE HIP-HOP INDUSTRY AS WE KNOW IT, PAL!

I... did WHAT!?

Well, I guess that means don't quit your day job, Nick.

*sob*

---

Ayup.
That's my line!
Ummmm.....No it isn't.
It's my line! Stop stealing my lines!
SWEET CRISPY FRIED CRAP! *KOes Yogi* Anyways, onto the series premiere of...
THE REAL WORLD:GS EDITION
-----------
OK, I'm going to go over the rules, so pay attention.
Reality TV has rules?
There are only two rules. You must live here till the end of the season, and you must not kill any of the fellow roommates. You can get them as close to death as possible, but you can't kill them. Are we clear.
Yes.
Good. Now all we need is one quick private bio interview with everyone.
-----------
Hello, I'm Phoenix Wright, and I like long walks on the bea.....oh. Not that kind of interview. A little background and opinion on the other people? OK. I'm an attorney working in LA. I pretty much know everyone here so...that Minuki girl, she looks stupid. I mean, she dresses up like a wizard or something. And what's up with that one guy and his hair. I mean, I could use them as hedge trimmers!
----------
Hello, I'm Maya Fey. I'm Phoenix's assistent. You know, the hunk that was in here a few minutes ago. Also, I'm a spirit medium. Well, me and Nick, we're in love. He may not act like it, but we're meant to be.....EDGEWORTH IS A DUCHE!
----------
Hello, I'm Mia Fey. I'm an attorney and I... What are you staring at Elias?
Nothing.
Anyways, I... You're doing it again.
No I'm.......You know what, screw it. I need my alone time. *Runs off*
Anyways, I...
*Interrupting* HAVE BIG BRE...
*Interrupting* SHUT UP! Anyways, Maya's my younger sister.
*Walking back to cameraman position* OK, I'm back.
Anyways, me and Maya, we are reeeeeaaaaaal close.
And once again I have to leave.
---------
Hello, I'm Minuki, and I'm a magician and assistent to Odoroki. I honestly think that he's an idiot. I mean, I'm constantly buying him time with my magic tricks, and do I get a thank you? NO! I feel so happy that I left him for one of the Garyuu brothers. Unfortunately, I can't remember which one. They look to much alike.
---------
Hello, my name is Odoroki. I'm Phoenix's replacement in the forth game. I work under Garyuu and am assisted by Minuki. She says that we were dating and she broke up with me, but I know she's going to fall for me in the e...HEY, GET OFF HER YOU GARYUU CREEP!
---------
Hello, I'm Godot. I'm a prosecuting attorney, and am really close with Mia. Also, I hate Maruhodo.
HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU, IT'S PHOENIX WRIGHT!
---------
Hello, I'm Franziska von Karma. I'm the daughter if Manfred von Karma and older sister to Miles Edgeworth. I'll whip anything that gets in my way. Thank you. *Starts to get up*
You could say a little mo...*Whipped*
---------
Hello, I'm Miles Edgeworth. I'm Nick's rival, ace prosecutor, and alone timer extrordonare.
We didn't need to know that.
What do you mean. You were doing the exact same thing a few minutes ago!
No...I...wasn't. I wassssssss.....Playing with my magical bannana which shoots cream cheese when you rub it.
Yeah, let's go with that.
No, really. *Pulls out a bannana*
---------
Hello, I'm Pearl Fey, and I'm an eight-year-old spirit medium. I'm so happy to be on this show! *Does little jump thing*
Dear God, she's blinding me with cuteness.
Hey Elias, I'm in a free hug mood.
Must....keep...professionalness....and...not...hug...the...cuteness!
TO BE CONTINUED!

---

@Elias: A good start. I'm looking forward to more in the future!

---

You will see this on all of my posts. I used this account when I was 13-14 and some of the content I am not happy about. I am sorry to anyone who read my posts and was rightfully offended by any of it. I will likely not use this website again, just FYI.

Last edited by Wizard Anon on Thu Apr 15, 2021 3:45 am, edited 1 time in total.

#1...Phoenix Trigun!

"Join me in a number, won't you, Phoenix the Stampede?"
"Phoenix...the Stampede?" -Run away-
"Ha! Gung Ho Guns number 11...EDGEY THE HORNFREAK TAKES THE STAGE!"
"WHAAAAAAAAAAAA?! HOW MANY FREAKING GUNG HO GUNS ARE THERE?!"
[So sad that I'm such a Trigun nerd and I just happened to notice the Edgey to Middie similarities...]

#2 Phoenix Fantasy X-2

"M...A...P...in position..."
-Trips over his own sword.-
"...Payne...You're so going to ruin our mission."
"And now I'm never getting my dressphere back!" -Cries.-

#3 The Phoenix Wright Show

"Today on my show...we're here to find the fathers of our guests' children. Here is our first guest, Miles...HOLY CRAP! WHAT THE HELL?!"

"...I called the show. Because I refuse to marry my fiance if the boy's not mine."

"Um...okay...let's bring out...um...APRIL MAY?! SURELY YOU HAVE BETTER TASTE, MILES!?"

"That's it...you'd better be glad this ain't Jerry Springer!"


#4 Fairly Oddlawyers

"Edgey is an average prosecutor
That no one understands!
Karma, Gant, and Franny
Always giving him commands!"

"Bed twerp!"

"Doom and gloom
Up in his room
Is broken instantly
By his magic little fish
Who grant his every wish
Because in reality...
They are his oddlawyers
Fairly oddlawyers!"

"Wands and wings!"
"Floaty crowny things!"

"Oddlawyers! Fairly oddlawyers!
Really mod, pea pod
Buff bod, hot rod!"

"Objection, protection, affection, inflection!
Plane-y snake, birthday cake, large fries, chocolate shake!"

:matt: "Oddlawyers! Fairly oddlawers!
Really flips your lid
When you're the prosecutin' kid
Wit fairly oddlawyers!"

"Yeah right!"

---

Now, I will give you, the viewers at home, a tour of the house.
--------
Here is the living room. It has a plasma screen TV, a ping pong table, air hockey, foozball, a 360, a Wii, and a PS2.
*Sitting on couch* Out of complete curiosity, why not a PS3?
We already covered half of our budget, and if we bought that we would be over.
And what exactly was your budget?
$2,000,000.
--------
And over here we have the kitchen. We have a fully stocked fridge with top of the line equipment.
*Making coffee*
*Walks in* Hey Elias. Hey Godot.
How many times do I have to tell you, it's Godot.
Ummmm....You just said the exact same thing.
No. You pronounce it Go-dot. It's pronounced Ga-doe.
The T is silent? You mean like in French?
Yes. It's French.
So, you're a Frenchie?
The name, not me.
Hey guys! Godot's a Frenchie!
Am I going to have to beat you?
How could you do that? The moment I attack you would surrender, you wine drinking surrender monkey.
THAT'S IT! *Starts attacking Edgy*
Note: Any and all opinions expressed by the characters in our show are not exactly that of Turnabout Channel or it's workers, me included.
--------
And here is the backyard. It has one of the most powerful barbacues in the world, a swimming pool, and a hot tub.
*Whistling Hare Hare Yukai (AKA The melancoly of HS ending theme) whilst cooking steaks on the BBQ.*
*Wearing robe as she walks over to the hot tub* Hello Nick. Do you want to join me in the hot tub? *Takes off robe as she enters the hot tub, revealing that she's naked*
Nah. I'm cooking steaks. Don't want to overcook them.
Are you sure?
Sure I'm sure.
*run out in towels* Hey Nick, we were just about to take a shower, but it's being screwy. Do you think you can help us?
Sure! *Runs in with those two behind*
......
--------
And here is the bathroo.....
.......
........
........I was mast...
CUT!

---

You will see this on all of my posts. I used this account when I was 13-14 and some of the content I am not happy about. I am sorry to anyone who read my posts and was rightfully offended by any of it. I will likely not use this website again, just FYI.

Last edited by Wizard Anon on Thu Apr 15, 2021 3:44 am, edited 1 time in total.

*Random German bad words*

Why does german sound so angry...

some people just sound angry talking like normal

-------------------

Welcome to Blockbuster, how may I help you?

ARGH!! I WOULD LIKE TO RESERVE A COPY OF-ARGH- SMOKIN' ACES!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My god sir why are you so angry?

I'M -ARGH- IN A GOOD MOOD ACTUALLY!!! ARGH

...ok

---

The characters you used for "right" are actually supposed to mean "rights", as in "your rights as a citizen" and not the context you used them in. The joys of automatic translators...

---

Hey Beavis, why are we going to Stewart's house?

I heard he got diahrrea. Heh heh heh...

Uhhhh... uh huh huh huh huh...

Beavis and Butt-head ring the doorbell and someone comes to the door.

Ah, you must be here to bring Stewart his homework.

Does he really have diahrrea and stuff?

Afraid so. He's been in the bathroom all day.

Heh heh... diahrrea. PFFOOOOOOHT!!!!

Uh huh huh huh huh

Now boys... did you two have any breakfast?

... I think I did once.

You can't start the day without breakfast. Come in and have some burritos I made awhile ago.

Beavis and Butt-head go in and sit down in the kitchen.

Oh wait, I have to bring Stewart some TP quickly.

She leaves the room and Beavis and Butt-head bite the burritos, then spit them out in disgust after the first bite.

BLEACKH!!!!!

UGH! No wonder Stewart got diahrrea! Huh huh huh huh...

To be continued

---

[Some 2-4 ending spoilers]

: Mr. Lawyer, dude, you remembered to feed my cat, right?
: Oh... I thought your butler did it, so I didn't bother.
: My butler...? Oh, you mean...
: ...Shelly de Killer, right? He's not really my butler, just an assassin, so he does no butlerly deeds.
: Oh... right...
: Wait a minute! That means nobody has fed your cat!
: ...
: Oh God! I'm so sorry!
: ...
: Please! I'm so very sorry!
: ...I'm crying inside, I really am.

I was thinking this while I finished Case 4. Seriously ...

---

(chaz): Chaz is back! :D

Here's a quickie, feel free to shoot me/notify me if it's been done before...

*At college, (17) & (19) are talking*

I bet you can't shove 11 of any kind of citrus fruit up your nose by midday today!

You're on!

...And that's why. :D

---

I bring you two things. "Self" and "Defence"


You took the two hour train ride to tell me that?


...


Do not act stupid Prosecutor. Speak in sentences, not riddles.


How do you lawers allow your assisstants to speak as you do!?


What is it you want Prosecutor?


A plea of self defence from your client. I win you. You win. We don't have to go to court.


.........





You come to my ofice offering "Guilt" and....... "Y"


This is stupidity! This is bluffing!


This isn't bluffing......


THIS IS EVIDENCE!




...


Wanna get a beer later?


OK!



________________________________
*Another Scene*


A few prosecutors will desend upon you!


Yo


Our whips will bloke out the Judge!





Huh. I did not think that one threw...

______________________________________
*One more*


Lawers! Tonight we drink at Starbucks!


Yay!

---

Hello. My name is Impulse, and today I'm going to be possessing the body of Ema Skye to bring you amazing funnies of hilarity and joy.
In case you were wondering why I'm possessing Ema despite the fact I hate science and aren't particularly cheery, I was going to choose Maya, (who I am like, at least when I'm in a good mood) but then I realised she's a main character which would just get confusing. And CI might force me to kiss Phoenix. Also when I'm in a bad mood and/or want to rip someone's arms off and beat them to death with them, I'm kinda like GS4 Ema.
And I can do a really good cosplay of Ema, if only I could find a labcoat. Anyway, without further ado, I present-
Hold on. You can't just start writing funnies whilynily!
Huh? Everyone else does. And is whilynily even a word?
Yes it is. And before you start writing funnies you need to complete...
...
...Yes?
...
Edgeworth. That was your cue.
Oh sorry... THE TRIAL OF DEATH!
The..trial of death? Don't you have better things to do than force people to complete random trials?
No. Anyway, are you sure you're up to becoming a Funny Writer?
Yeah, how hard can it be?
Will Impulse complete the Trial of death? Find out in the next episode of Impulse's Amazing Funnies Of Hilarity And Joy- coming up in two lines!
....................
Well, I am Lawyer!
He is Lawyer!
She is Lawyer too!
I am Lawyer!
We are Lawyer!
And I believe that you are Lawyer too!
Impulse asks a Lawyer-
I understand not just anyone can become a Funny Writer, what tasks or requirements would one have to fulfill to become one?
I'll tell you Impulse. There are three basic requirements for becoming a Funny Writer.
ONE! If you want to be a full-fledged Funny Writer, sorry buddy, got to be born a Funny Writer. If you're not, chances are you're just gonna be Funny Writerlike or Funny Writeresque, like your Chinese Infantry, or Orcaizer Al, or something like that.
TWO! The physical requirements of becoming a Funny Writer. You must start your training at age six weeks. You've gotta do stuff like swim in a volcano, you gotta walk through a blizzard without a flake of snow hitting you, and of course you have to fight every beast known to man.
And then of course, the third challenge to becoming a Funny Writer is the mental challenges. The Funny Writer's give you a bitchin' 5000 question multiple choice questionaire, and let me tell you, these things are tough. They're tricky, they're coming at you at these angles where you're like it's kinda B & C, but it's really D. Oh man, it blows my mind! It took me 3 times to pass it, and I'm a pure-bred frickin Funny Writer!
Huh? I thought you where a lawyer?
Don't you know? I'm secretly Pudding. That's why he's dissappered. I'm practising my lines for T&T.
Anyway, if you can acomplish those three things, Impulse, ONE! Be born a Funny Writer! TWO! Acomplish the physical goals! And THREE! Acomplish the mental goals, then you might be become Funny Writer, or Funny Writeresque.
Best of luck Impulse, I look forward to critising your Funnies soon!
...
...
Can't I just rip off Alone Time Jokes?
Yeah, whatever.

---

Last edited by Impulse on Fri Apr 20, 2007 7:20 pm, edited 1 time in total.

(chaz) I didn't know you had to do all that stuff! I just had a little experience writing MCRmy scenarios. They were these things where we thought up funny situations involving My Chemical Romance and...

Enough about that. Get back to writing proper funnies already, lest I be forced to do something really nasty...

...

...

... *runs off* *taptaptap*

Hmm, he must have gone off to type up some funnies. *runs off* *fapfapfap* WHAT IN THE HELL AM I DOING!? Alone time, but NOT IN THE BATHROOM!? ARE YOU MAD, CHAZ! The bathroom is the vital environment for alone time jokes. Screw this I'm going to the bathroom in my trailer...

---

So do you have a cold or something?


Um no. Don't you watch the news? LA has been infected by SARS...


........ Sh!t...

---

Welcome to another episode of Impulse's Funnies Of Hilarity And Joy, brought to you in partnership with 'Why The Hell Am I Still On Here? Peep Show Is Starting In A Minute And I Don't Want To Miss It Again. Actually, Is The Sky + Recording it? That's All Right Then. Oh Wait, The Sky + Doesn't Work With Channel 4, So I'm Gonna Have To Watch It After All' Services
I'm having alone time. LAWL.
I can't get any girls cos I bang Edgeworth. LAWL.
I want Nick to bang me, but he bangs Edgeworth. LAWL.
I Whip Things. LAWL.
Hold it! You're not going any further. See what happens when you skip Funny Writing training? Now that's just painful.
You shouldn't have thrown me into that volcano before I was ready then! That was painful!
Err... You're hair's still on fire.
...
...
Would you rather I spray luminol in your eyes until you're blinded, rip off your arms and beat you with them, or stuff sausages down your pants and set a pack of rabid dogs after you?
How disturbed are you?!?
Very.
*cough* Anyway, if you'd rather not complete the TRIAL OF DEATH! You can still become a Funny Writer...
How? If it involves volcanoes I'm not doing it.
Not at all! You just have to complete a three day training course with me and Wright, and at the end you get a certificate, and a small mallet to beat people when they critisise your funnies.
(Three days with these two? I'd rather take the volcano...) ...Alright. The sooner start, the sooner we get it over with.
Let the training montage begin!
*That Music From The 118 Adverts Plays. Y'know I Once Got A Telephone Operater Guy To Sing That Song Down The Phone. Now That Was Hilarious! He Was All 'One One Eiiggghhht! One One Eiiigggghhht!' Anyway, I Digress*
Training Montage- Part One
The Odd Ship
Okay, to become a Funny Writer it seems you have to support an odd ship. Well, at least not a popular one. So, what ships do you support?
Errr... Franziska/Adrian
Too mainstream. Next!
Phoenix/Edgeworth
Did you just say Phoenix and Edgeworth? Me and him?
Yeah, scientifically speaking, you make a great couple! ...Ugghhh, I've been in this body too long.
You're joking, right?
No! Don't tell me you haven't read One of Every Color?
No. And I don't want to. Next!
Hobohodo/Ema?
You ship...Yourself?
I'm not Ema.
Now that's disgusting.
I'M NOT EMA.
Shipping yourself with me ten years in the future? You sicken me.
I'M NOT FREAKING EMA! I'M IMPULSE! GET IT! IMPULSE! *sprays luminol*
Ahhhh!
Though I must admit, this luminol comes in handy.
Okay, all your ships are useless due to being
a) Too mainstream
b) Icky
c) Confusing and Icky.
So, I suppose it's time for 'Honest Edgeworth's Ship Creater!' Buy it now for just £29.99! Or 3 easy installments of £10.01! Or 6 easy installments of £5.0.5
Stealing CI's jokes now, are we? And your maths doesn't even make sense. Who has half of 1p?
Shush. There are three parts to to the Honest Edgeworth Ship Creater. First, pick two characters from from Honest Edgeworth's 'Lucky PW Character Dip!' Here to help me tonight is my lovely assistant, Phoenix!
I hate you. Anyway, I'm going to pick two characters from the lucky dip. Here goes...
(Please be Impulse/Young Edgeworth. Please be Impulse/Young Edgeworth...)
And the two characters are... / !
...You are both idiots. That ship makes the least sense, ever.
No, the ship that would make the least sense ever would be / or / . Now, onto Step 2...

Will Impulse Survive Step 2 without killing Phoenix and Edgeworth? Will Edgeworth stop being an idiot? Will Impulse Get To The TV In Time To Watch Peep Show? Find Out In The Next Episode Of Impulse's Funnies Of Hilarity And Joy!
(Except the Peep Show Thing)

---

Well, now, in order to make you all look like idiots, we're going to all sit around this campfire and tell humiliating stories about all of us. So who will volunteer to go first.
*raises hand* Oooooh! Ooooooh! Pick me! Pick me!
OK, then, what's your story.
Well, this one time, at lawyer camp, Nick...
Hey! That's my line!
Did you actually have a story?
....No......
Anyways....
----Lawyer Camp Girls Cabin----
*13 years old* And then, I was like, "If you wear that to the mall tonight, I'm soooooooooo not your friend anymore."
*somehow also 13* And did she?
She did! Can you believe that.
*also 13 amazingly, runs in naked* I'M A CHARGIN' MY LAZR SHOOP-DA-WHOOP! *runs off*
--------
And I made 100 bucks off of that.
OK, who's next.
Well, there's this one Edgeworth story...
----Back at Camp----
*You hear him in his bed, though the camera focuses on Nick*
......Seriously dude. All that noise over there is keeping me from getting to sleep.
Ignore it. I'm having my alone time.
UGH! What's this nasty goo that just dripped into my mouth?
--------
........I'm taking the Nick path and staying silent about that.
Anywaaaaaaays...Who's next?
Well.....
----Back at Camp----
I just got this truth or dare card game. Wanna play?
Sure!
----A few minutes later----
OK, truth or dare?
Dare! *Draws a card* You must.......
What is it?
I have to passionately make out with one of the other players.
But it's just the two of us.... Man, is this room cold?
Come over here. I know something that will make it warm.
--------
I remember that!
Me too!
That never left the cabin.
How exactly were you able to know about it?
We're staying silent about that.
I was thinking you would get a little more descriptive on that make out scene.
What, you think I would make over descriptive lesbian sex? I'm not CI.
To Be continued.

---

Does that thing shoot lasers?


Thank God. I thought no one would ask! *Shoots laser*

*The Next Day*


Hey! Who the hell shot a laser threw my office wall last night? I'm looking at you Godot.


Oh so a laser goes threw your wall and you automatically blame the guy with the visor huh?!


... Yes!


Yea I would of done the same thing to.


Well I hope your happy, you ruined my romantic evening with um.....


With who?


*Wearing an even smaller towel* Hey Edgey that shower's still as good as anything!

---

Location: FG(AOF)NIHT Studios, AKA Gant's House

*Playing Super Smash Brothers Melee with Gant, Godot and Gumshoe. Playing as Marth.* So, I hear something special is going to occur on tonight's episode of our show.

*Playing as Dr. Mario* Ten to one it's Maruhodou and Edgeworth's confession of love for each other and then their first live make out session, bitch!

Seriously, Godot, that is starting to get old. YEAH, GOT THE POKéBALL!

As long as Phoenix/Edgeworth shippers make up most of the fandom, it will never get old, bitch! HA, MISSED ME.

*Playing as Bowser, who just grabbed Marth and is using his downward throw* HOW DO YOU LIKE MY DRY HUMPING, WORTHY!?

Gant, you do know there are other throws right. And that Bowser is the worst character ever in SSBM.

THAT TITLE IS RESERVED FOR MR. GAME AND WATCH, WORTHY MY BOY!

*Playing as Mr. Game and Watch* I got knocked off by that Cyndaquil thing, pal!

Wow, you do suck, bitch! You play as the worst character and get knocked off by the worst Pokémon, aside from Goldeen. Say, why isn't that fag Maruhodou playing, bitch?

Two reasons! One: there are only four controller ports. Two: he's in his usual position...

On the couch making out with Maya, pal?

Yup...

I GOT THE HAMMER! NOW YOU ARE ALL FUCKED!

*Location: The couch where Phoenix and Maya usually make out*

*Kissing Maya* (No matter how many times I do this, it never gets old! It's like everyday, her lips have a new flavor.)

*Kissing Phoenix* Nick, did I ever tell you that I love you?

Every day, my love. And every day, I feel the same towards you.

HEY, EDGEWORTHFUCKER! STOP TRYING TO COVER UP YOUR OWN GAYNESS AND COME PLAY SOME VIDEOGAMES WITH US, BITCH!

First of all, that is not how you ask someone to do something for you. Secondly, I already played videogames.

Ohh yeah, which ones?

Before you guys got here, Maya and I were playing some Gears of War, trying to beat Campaign on Insane.

He's so hopeless with out me. Half the battles, I end up having to revive him when he gets shot up by some Locust.

Hey, I just trying to get the Chainsaw achievement, okay?

You do know that you can only get that on Xbox LIVE, right?

OHH GOD FUCKING DAMMIT!

Where the hell did you come from?

Ohh, I was always here, I was just staying quiet. Anyways, the show starts in 5 minutes, so please halt all videogame playing and making out and head to the hot tub.

DAMMIT, BITCH, I WAS WINNING TOO!

And now, the commercial which pays for this show!

*Commercial*

COMING OUT! WE ARE HAVING A MASSIVE SALE AT THE BLONDE WAREHOUSE! THE ONE SHOP STOP FOR ALL YOUR BLONDE NEEDS. GET 100% OFF ON ALL OF OUR PRODUCTS, INCLUDING SOLAR POWERED FLASHLIGHTS, WATERPROOF TEABAGS, INFLATABLE DARTBOARDS AND PLAYSTATION 3s! ALSO, SIGN UP FOR OUR CONTEST WHERE YOU CAN WIN YOUR VERY OWN SCREENDOOR SUBMARINE! JUST LISTEN TO OUR CELEBRITY TESTIMONIAL!

*eliasbloodmoon* I just bought myself some see-through window shades for my living room and I love it! It goes great with my collection of wooden nickels and fool's gold! WHEEE!

Author's note: Sorry, elias, but that funny you wrote begged for me to make a cameo of you.

SO COME ON DOWN TO THE BLONDE WEARHOUSE. BECAUSE WE CARRY THE MOST USEFUL PRODUCTS ON THE FACE OF THE EARTH!

Annnnnnnd, cut!

Oooh, it really turns me on when you talk in all capital letters.

*blushes* Franziska, what are you doing here?

*Puts arm around Adrian's waist* Ohh, just watching my Adri shoot her first commercial. You know I wouldn't miss it for the world.

*Starts taking off clothes* oooh, you going to punish me now, Mistress.

I'll punish you as much as you want.

*Insert Hot Franny/Adrian lesbian sex scene here*

Waaait, does that light mean the camera is still on?

Ohh GODDAMMIT! *Shuts off camera*

*End commercial*

And now, our feature presentation!

Chinese Infantry presents (and blew his whole special effects budget on):












Thanks for the sweetass intro! Damn, do I look sexy!

Ooooh, I'll say.

Why don't I get an elaborate picture like yours?

Because you touch yourself at night.

.............no I don't.

Then what do you do during your alone time?

I MAS...

"We know", blah blah blah. Anyways, before we begin, I would like to ask all group members to please refrain from mentioning any GS4 spoilers.

You think you're so smart, Maruhodou, with your hobo ensemble and your....

LOOK, WHAT DID I JUST SAY ABOUT GS4 SPOILERS?

What are you going to do about it, bitch?

Well not only will the show be pulled off the air, but CI will be banned for it.

Well what the fuck are we supposed to talk about, bitch? We've exausted nearly everything in the first three games.

Worry about that later. Issue number 1: Mia's Objection, or more appropriately, Mia's Ubjiction. If there is one thing I'm glad I didn't learn from Mia, it was how to shout objection, because quite frankly, if I saw myself yelling that, I would have to kick my own ass. Edgeworth, would you like to start us off with why Mia fails at Objection?

That's quite simple. When she was investing attribute points, she put all of them into the "Boob size" stat and none of them into the "Objection" stat.

Edgeworth, this isn't an RPG. There is no such thing as attribute points.

Then can you please explain to me how everytime someone kills a certain number of monsters, they suddenly run faster, fight stronger and all of the sudden shoot fireballs out of their ass.

That's because it is a videogame. It is purely fictional.

...But mommy always told me the reason I didn't get good grades in school is because I didn't invest enough points into my intelligence stat.

Well, you're mommy's an idiot.

That would explain where he got it from, bitch!

...Does that mean if I die, I won't respawn either? Because my daddy told me that you could.

Well, then your daddy's an idiot too, bitch! I guess idiocy runs in the family!

Ok, enough of RPG stats and Gumshoe's idiocy. Maya, being the person who was closest to Mia, I'm sure you could shed some light as to why your sister couldn't object properly to save her life.

Well, it started back when we were younger.

*Flashback*

*Age 7* NOOO, MIA, I WANT COOKIE! I'M HUNGRRRYYY!

*Age 17* I SAW IT FIRST!

MYSTIC MIA! I thought we went over this! You are supposed to say "Objection!", not "Ubjiction!"

But Aunt Morgan, that's what I said,

Not so, young lady. If you ever want to be a Defense Attorney like you keep saying you want to, then you will object PROPERLY! Now give that cookie to Mystic Maya and go to your room!

YAAAAAY!

(Why is Aunt Morgan being so mean. I'm just saying Ubjiction. It must have something to do with that statue of Stalin that got shoved up her ass!)

WHAT WHAT WHAAAAAT?

(Shit! forgot she could hear my thoughts!)

OHH, YOU ARE GROUNDED, MYSTIC MIA! NO STRAWBERRY DESERTS FOR YOU, YOUNG LADY!

*End Flashback*

So you see, she never was any good at objecting. As for why, well, she never told me... *looks glum*

*Puts arm around Maya* It's ok, you still did good. Gant, give us your thoughts.

IT'S ALL BECAUSE SHE'S A WO...

STOP RIGHT THERE! STOP...RIGHT...THERE! I DON'T NEED ANOTHER ARMY OF RADICAL FEMINISTS THREATENING TO CUT OFF MY DICK AND FORCE ME TO EAT IT BECAUSE YOU MADE A SEXIST REMARK.

Dude, did that actually happen to you?

Ohh I come home to them just about every show. They are usually mixed in with Soccer Moms and Christian Interest groups as well. But enough of that. Godot, your opinion on Mia's lame excuse for an Objection.

Hey now, you should be nicer to your former mentor, bitch! Now I know you prefer men, but that doesn't give you a pass to disrespect women...

Since when did you care about respect towards women, Mr. "I'm a pimp who slaps my hoes!"?

Well, the darling kitten you are talking about happens to be my former lover, bitch! And I still haven't forgiven you for what happened to her.

We've been over this a million times. It was Redd White who killed Mia because he's a bag of douche.

And it was you who didn't do jack shit about it, bitch! In fact, you should be in prison with him getting raped up the ass by him. Wait, scratch that, you'd probably enjoy it.

...And you wonder why Croik hates you.

What?

Nothing. Gumshoe, why does Mia fail at objecting?

...I dunno!

That's what I thought!

No, I'm serious, I don't know. Why doesn't Maya channel her and then you ask her.

Whoa...that was actually...a good idea....

But it was Gumshoe who said it......

Fuck it! Maya, honey, could you please channel Mia for me?

Yes, Nick?

Holy shit, you are fast!

...I guess I am. Is there something you would like to ask me.

Yes, there is. Mia, you were a great teacher to me, and if it wasn't for you, I probably wouldn't be here. But why? Ohh WHY CAN'T YOU OBJECT PROPERLY?

Ohhh....that. Well, Grossberg was worried about that too, so after talking about his youth and the scent of fresh lemons, he sent me to a doctor. It turns out I have a rare bone disease that switches the sounds for the words Ubjiction and Obesoft...

...So because of this rare bone disease, you can't say "Objection" or "Ubisoft" properly?

Sadly yes. I can't even write them properly. I was trying to send Obesoft a letter complaining about them bastardizing Rainbow Six: Lockdown, and then ended up laughing at me!

...that's so sad. I'm sorry to hear about your bone disease, Mia!

...It's ok.....however, I assume you don't need me any longer, so I'll just be going now!

NOOO! COME BACK TO ME, MY LOVE! *Mia reverts back to Maya* GOOD JOB, MARUHODOU, YOU TOOK HER AWAY FROM ME AGAIN, BITCH!

(What did I do?) Ok, now that Godot's back to his old pimp self and Mia just ripped off South Park, let's move on. Issue number 2: Jack Thompson. AKA, the Biggest Douche In the Universe. I bring this up because after the tragedy that occured at Virginia Tech, this asshole has the nerve to make some bullshit claim that videogames are the reason the man went on a shooting rampage. I mean, WHAT THE FUCK!? THE FAMILIES OF VICTIMS OF THIS SHOOTING WILL NEVER SEE THEIR SON OR DAUGHTER AGAIN AND YOU EXPLOIT THIS JUST TO FURTHER YOUR CAREER! YOU SICKEN ME TO NO END!

Dude, calm down, he's pulled shit like this before.

BUT THIS IS THE REASON LAWYERS GET A BAD RAP! SERIOUSLY, EVERY TIME I WIN A CASE, I FEEL AS THOUGH THIS ASSHOLE GETS RID OF THE GOOD I'VE DONE BY OPENING HIS MOUTH! EDGEWORTH, START US THE FUCK OFF!

I'd hate to break it to you, Wright, but Lawyers have gotten a bad rap loooong before this piece of shit showed up. Hell, Gyakuten Saiban is practially the only series around that shows Lawyers in a positive light.

What about To Kill a Mockingbird?

Doesn't count because it wasn't a series.

But still...

Whatever. Don't know, don't fucking care. Maya, let's hear from you.

The other day, someone came up to me and said "You do know that guy you go out it is a scumbucket lawyer right." To which I reply "So? But he's a good person! Why do you hate lawyers?" to which she replied "...Jack Thompson."

...But you still love me, right?

Of course I do, Nicky-kins. No matter how much of a sad excuse of a person Jack Thompson is.

(Author's note: It's true. I am the only person who can diss Jack Thompson and make it into a Phoenix/Maya bit at the same time!)

*Kisses Maya on the cheek* I love you too, Maya. Anyways, Gant, what have you to say on this shitbag who carries my profession.

...He is the only man alive that does not give me a raging erection!

...errr, that's one way of putting it.

BUT GEORGE W. BUSH, NOW HE'S A STUD. I'D HAVE SEXUAL RELATIONS WITH THAT MAN ANY DAY OF THE WEEK, EVEN IF IT WOULD ALMOST GET HIM IMPEACHED.

(Even if that was a Clinton joke and it was still 1999, I still doubt that would be funny...) So you want to pork the President of the United States? Good for you, no one cares, it is now Godot's turn!

Jack Thompson is a fucking jackshit who should be stabbed in the balls with a railroad spike, bitch! He's a fucking fucked up fucker who should fucking be shot in the fucking head with a fucking shotgun and then fucking fucked by a fucking inmate and then afterwards be fucking mailed to fucking North Korea with a fucking South Korean flag stapled to his fucking carcass, fucking bitch!

Congratuations, Godot! I think you have successfully broken the record for "Most uses of the word "fuck" in a single sentence."

Thanks, bitch!

...that wasn't a compliment.

Ahh, fuck you, you fuck Edgeworth in the ass anyways, bitch!

...And it is now Gumshoe's turn to talk about the asshole known as Jack Thompson.

....Jack who?

Jack Thompson, Douchebag Attorney. Public gamer enemy #1! Do you know him?

....he molested me once and claimed God willed it....

(Somehow, am I not surprised...) Ok, issue number 3: The / pairing. It is a known fact that a lot of the same people who ship Me/Maya also ship Edgeworth/Franziska. This pairing also sketches many people out because they see it as incest. The question tonight: is it incest or not? Edgeworth, since you are one of the members of the pairing, we'll start off with you.

Well, it's quite obvious that this pairing is grade-A bullshit, bitch! Why? Because it's known fact that Maruhodou and Edgeworth are gay lovers. I mean, why the hell else would every other fanfic and fanart be Maruhodou/Edgeworth?

..Not only did you talk out of turn, but you once again went off on a tangent as to why you think Edgeworth and I are homosexuals. You don't get another turn for the rest of this topic. Now Edgeworth, lets hear what you had to say before Mr. Coffee Pimp rudely interrupted...

Well, it's not incest, you know why? Because Franny and I aren't related by blood.

But you were raised as brother and sister. Wouldn't that be enough to qualify squicking or whatever the fuck that word is people out?

Hey, as long as I have sex with her and we don't produce kids with eleven toes and only one testicle, it ain't incest, got it?

(Somehow, I don't think that's going to convince most people...) So, my dear sweet Maya, do you have any thoughts?

I think they make a cute couple, like us, Nick!

Good enough for me.

NOOOOO, EDGEY-POO WILL NOT GO WITH THAT VON KARMA HARLOT! HE IS MINE, AND MINE FOREVER.

...and where the fuck did you come from?

There's no time, Edgey-poo. Come with me so that we may be lovers forever. Our combined love together will be able to topple down our fascist warmonger resource wasting Government. FIGHT THE SYSTEM!

Ummm.....

*Rips off clothes* I AM A FREE SPIRIT! I AIN'T LETTING THE MAN KEEP ME DOWN! FIGHT OPPRESSION! *Holds up Iraq War protest sign* NO BLOOD FOR OIL! NO BLOOD FOR OIL!

Now y'all better put down them hippie signs of your and stop badmouthing AMERICA! 'CAUSE IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT, YOU CAN GIT OUT, YOU TREE-HUGGIN' PINKO COMMIE!

(Since when was there a sign outfront that says "Please voice political cause here!"?)

AND WHO'S GONNA STOP ME, YOU GUN-TOTING, COUSIN-LOVING REDNECK? YOU AND WHAT ARMY?

THIS ONE! *Points to group of Women behind her* THE NATIONAL ASSOCIATION OF PATRIOTIC WOMEN! DEDICATED TO STOPPIN' RADICAL LIBERAL HIPPIES LIKE YOU!

WELL I'VE GOT MY OWN GROUP AS WELL, WARMONGER *Points to group of women behind her* COME ON, GIRLS! IF WAR IS ALL THESE CONSERVATIVES WANT, THERE WAR THEY SHALL GET! STOP THE OPPRESSORS!

....I think I know where this is going...

And so, the conservative and liberal groups got into a huge fight. Punches were thrown, political slogans were yelled, clothes flew off...

...Edgey needs his alone time now!

...and Edgeworth had his alone time. Once both groups were completely naked, they gained magical powers. Showers of flame, ice, thunder flew from each of them to strike down their opponents, in a battle of epic proportions that could never be shown in a low budget Phoenix Wright Funny such as this.

...Great, this shit ain't getting any better, so I'm wrapping it up. Tune in next time for...

NOOOOOOO! DO NOT END NOW, I STILL HAVE SOMETHING SPECIAL TO DO!

...And what would that be?

...I can't tell you.

Well I already know what you are going to do, so I am going to cut to a commercial break to get this battle mopped up and then you can resume, ok?

Four Guys (and one freeballer) NAKED IN A HOT TUB! will be right back after this message

*Commercial*

This is Chinese Infantry here, and I am pleased to anounce the grand opening of my fashion boutique: Women's Clothing...FOR MEN! The place for all your cross-dressing needs. The only store where men don't have to use the gift excuse in order to buy women's clothing. Just look at a satisfied customer!

*Wearing a female Tres bien uniform* LOOK AT ME! I'M A FRILLY WAITRESS, BITCH!

Some come on down and get youself a schoolgirl outfit or a pretty princess dress. You'll be a hit with the fangirls in no time because apparently, they are into that sort of thing.

WOMEN'S CLOTHING...FOR MEN! Because crossdressers deserve a store too!

*End Commercial*

And now, back to Four Guys (and one freeballer) NAKED IN A HOT TUB!

Well, that didn't take too long. It's amazing what godmodding, author tools and plotholes can do!

...After seeing that commercial, this now Issue number 4: this forum's obsession with crossdressing. Seriously, what is up with you people and seeing us in women's clothing. Do you get your jollies from that somehow? Though on the other hand, it funny seeing Godot dressed like a girl!

Yeah, well you assfuck Edgeworth every night, bitch!

I expected that response. Edgeworth...

I now officially hate fangirls. It's bad enough they make us look like complete wusses, but this? THIS IS DEGRADING TO US MEN! WE ARE NOT ALL SISSIFIED PRETTY BOYS WHO LIKE TO PLAY WITH EACHOTHER'S SCHLONGS, YOU KNOW! WE AREN'T HERE SO YOU CAN MAKE US SEXUAL OBJECTS!

...Keep in mind that fanboys are just as guilty of doing the same to female characters, if not more so...

Hmm, touche. But MY POINT ABOUT US NOT ALL BEING PRETTY BOYS STANDS.

(With your usual ensemble, that's hard to prove!) Whatever. Tells us your thoughts, Maya!

I think you would look cute in a pink dress, Nicky-kins!

Trust me, Maya, no I wouldn't.

Nick, if we ever got married, would you mind wearing the dress?

Maya, as much as I love and care for you, yes I would mind. I have a reputation to keep up, you know!

Aww, you're no fun *pouts*...

Fine, I'll tell you what. When we get home tonight, I'll promise you put on a schoolgirl outfit and dance for you as much as you want, okay?

Yaaaaaay *kisses Phoenix* but remember, you promised!

(And deja-vu sets in again...) Gant...

SOMETIMES, WHEN I HAVE SEX WITH PAYNE, I MAKE HIM DRESS UP IN A FRENCH MAID OUTFIT!

That's lovely Gant. We already know you are a sexual deviant who shouldn't be allowed in public. Godot, let's hear from a known crossdresser, shall we?

...I'm staying silent on this, bitch!

Why? You embarrased?

Now let's get one thing straight, bitch! Crossdressing =/= homosexuality! Sure, I may dress up in a waitress uniform or two, but I'm still straigher than you'll ever be, you Edgeworth-fucking bitch!

Aww, is the widdle waitress pissy?

I'LL FUCKIN' PIMP SLAP YOU, BITCH!

That's nice, now let's hear from Gumshoe!

...Franziska makes me wear a dress sometimes to work. She's mean.

(Dude, consider growing a backbone...) And Captain Obvious comes to the rescue! Issue number 5: the Me/Maya pairing. As you all know, I love Maya and she loves me...

*singing*
We're a happy fa-mi-ly!
With a great big hug and kiss from me to you!
Won't you say you love me too!

Man, I loved that show!

Are you kidding? THAT SHOW SHOULD BE TAKEN OFF THE AIR, BITCH! It completely shelters kids from real-world problems! At least Sesame Street had something going for it, bitch!

While Godot tries to become the next Bill Cosby, let's discuss the matter at hand. I love Maya with all my heart, yet some people think we shouldn't be a couple. Discuss! Edgeworth, we'll start off with you.

I don't care who you are paired with, just as long as it ain't me. Hell, start fucking Franny for all I care.

You know, Edgeworth. I'm sure it would be a whole lot easier on you if you just got out of denial and admitted your true feelings for...

...aaaaand it is Maya's turn.

Could I go last? I've got something special I want to say.

Of course. It would go better with what I had planned anyways. Gant, your thoughts?

NOW WHY WOULD YOU GO OUT WITH HER, WRIGHTO? YOU KNOW THAT YOU AND WORTHY WERE MEANT TO BE!

(Not you, too!)

See, Gant knows what I'm talking about. Deny it all you want, you know that Edgeworth is the only one for you.

FOR THE LAST FUCKING TIME, GODOT! I AM NOT, NEVER HAVE BEEN, AND NEVER WILL BE, IN LOVE WITH MILES EDGEWORTH! JUST FOR ONE, PLEASE SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT IT!





(Author's note: I know that is poorly made. Don't bother pointing it out...)

Hmm, well played...

And I will count that as your turn and move on to Gumshoe...

...You two are cute together.

I actually agree with you. I still haven't forgotten about you, my dear Maya, so it is your turn.

Nick...from the first time that I met you, I knew there was something special about you. There I was, a poor girl who was accused of the murder of the only person I had left. I had no one to turn, but then a man selflessly steps up and gives it everything he had, even risking his own life, to defend a girl he barely knew. At first, I saw you as a older brother, someone who looked after me and shared the occasional banter with. But more and more times, you risked your life for me, the person who probably deserve it least.

Don't say that! Having you around has been worth every risky trial and bad word said against me.

(Author's note: Toby Danger, you are the man! Please don't sue me!)

After what happened in Hazakurain, I realized that I don't want to be the annoying little girl that tags along with you. I realized where my heart belonged: with yours. I wanted to stand by you, to be able to support you they way you supported me. There is no word that can possibly describe how I feel towards you, so I'm just going to say it: I love you, Phoenix!

Aww, how sweet, pal!

Maya...at first I saw you as a younger sister. I had never imagined that I would become your lover, but as you grew, I was able to truly open my eyes to your beauty. I had realized that nothing made my day quite like seeing your beautiful smiling face. I love you too Maya, and if I was to be able to spend the rest of my life with you, nothing in the world would make me happier *pulls out box and opens it, revealing a wedding ring* Maya Fey, will you take my hand in marriage?

Of course I will, Phoenix Wright! I have been waiting forever to hear those words from you *jumps on Phoenix*

*The two embrace and lock lips*

While these two lovers kiss, I wish to talk about something serious: love. There is no real way you fall in love, no prerequisite, no secret formula, it's just there. Love is a special feeling where the sole purpose is nothing more than pure happiness. Love is about who you care for, not ethnicity or gender. Therefore, it doesn't matter if you are in love with a guy or a girl, if that's the way you feel about the person, nothing in the world can stop you. You may think I'm a hypocrite, because I hate the Phoenix/Edgeworth pairing and frequently make fun of it. Though I do hate the pairing, I am not counting out it's potential and support each and every person that does support it. Thank you for watching Fours guys (and one freeballer) naked in a hot tub! And may you all have a good night...

*Breaks kiss with Maya* Hold on, CI, I have to end this properly. Coming up next episode, assuming there is a next episode, we will venture into even more fascinating topics that will possibly scar you for life, kind of like being molested by Gant. MEETING ADJOURNED! *Locks lips with Maya once again*

---

Last edited by Chinese Infantry on Fri Jul 20, 2007 1:32 am, edited 1 time in total.

@Chinese Infantry: That was so freakin' brilliant that I almost popped both of my lungs laughing. And the VG Intro was a brilliant touch! I bow before your greatness! *bows*

CI owns the internet. CI's funnies are awesomeness in a jar. A pot, even.

---

XDD CI I ♥ JOO

---

*blushes* thanks for the support guys.

@LySs: Aww, I love you too!

Yes, I will be writing about the wedding. As soon as Tsurikato finishes the sketch I have planned for it, I will begin writing. I already have ideas for the wedding.

---

You win at life CI. You should own the Internet.

^No Objections here! And now, a Short Funny in which Pheonix Breaks down during the Second Games Final Trial.



*Desk Slam*
Damnit, Judge, why do you favor everyone in court but me? Payne Screeches at high pitched Intervals, Gumshoe bumbles through every testimony and has a thing for Edgeworth, Wellington Verbally Abused everyone, Maggey Bride is Paranoid, Franzika uses A FREAKING WHIP, Lotta can babble on in a southern drawl, Maya can shout out in court, Mia is DEAD, and NO ONE HAS NOTICED THAT SHE"S PERFECTLY ALIVE AND PROVED THAT MAYA WAS INNOCENT FROM THE FREAKING BEGINING OF EPISODE TWO, Director Hotti is a phony, Fake, pervert, Pearl Fey has a large Forehead, Morgan Fey made up pretty much everything, YOU LET INI MINEY GO THROUGH A FREAKING PERIOD AND LET HER DANCE ON THE STAND, WHILE SHE HAS BLOODY RED EYES, Max Gallactica HIT ON ME, Regina is a bloody STERIOTYPICAL BLONDE, Moe tells stupid jokes, YOU LET A FREAKING PUPPET TESTIFY, Acro brings in BIRDS, You Let EDGEWORTH CUT IN AT THE LAST MINUTE CAUSE SOMEONE TRYS TO BUMP FRANZIKA OFF, Oldbag is Senile, Adrian Andrews is mental, Will Powers is a gorrila in mens clothing, Matt Engarde gets DRINKS OUT OF NO WHERE, Shelly De Killer is a Freaking Radio corrospondant, AND YOUR A FREAKING STEP AWAY FROM CROSSDRESSERS HEAVEN! Meanwhile, All I do is present the wrong Evidence and You whittle me down to a HALF DEAD ATTORNEY! THIS IS UNJUST! I QUIT! GET YOUR OWN AQUITALL YOU *******! *Storms out of Courtroom, throwing badge onto floor as stunned members of Court stare after him.*

...Maya is officially screwed now, isn't she?

Doesn't Get much more screwed than that.

...Screwed to the Tenth Power.

...I know, it sucked...I'm sorrry for sucking so badly...

---

omg hot tub love! Where is Dahlia and Dee and Ini and April?

That was actually pretty funny! Great job!

Ok, it's babe time... *surfs internet*
Hey Nick!
Maya! Don't sneak on me like that! I'm looking for some good pics on the net.
Pics of what?
women.
No!
Yep.
Wait... I think I gave Mr. Edgeworth your house keys...
You did WHAT?!

---

You will see this on all of my posts. I used this account when I was 13-14 and some of the content I am not happy about. I am sorry to anyone who read my posts and was rightfully offended by any of it. I will likely not use this website again, just FYI.

Last edited by Wizard Anon on Thu Apr 15, 2021 3:44 am, edited 1 time in total.