Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
Forget everything you have just read...
Gender: Male
Location: England.
Rank: Desk Jockey
Joined: Sat Sep 08, 2007 12:54 pm
Posts: 92
So, whatta we got here?
Well, pal, this is a forum, pal. It's where people post obscene messages and use smilies to represent characters in a fan-service. No, I mean, who is this body here?
Oh.
*dead* No big loss. Detective Gumshoe, cause of death? Acute cyanide poisoning, brought on by blunt force trauma to the head. Neck ligatures indicate he was partially strangled first. There was also water in his lungs, and he was shot multiple times in the head. ...Really? No. According to witnesses, Klavier Gavin was making out with Apollo Justice on the beach, and he was crushed to death by a crowd of fangirls. Hmm...well, you know what they saw about forums. What? *puts glasses on* You better watch your step.
AHHHHHHRRRRRHHHHH! He can't be dead! Not my Ron-won? Sir? WTF are you talking about? My Ron-won's dead!!!!!
Should I use lethal force, sir? Yes. Send him to the Gant.
MWUHAHAHA! Time for some fun, Larry-boy! ARGHG! *is dragged off* There's another case to investigate after this one...*klik* *klik* *klik*
Yee-haw!!! That's my big scoop! Who let the paparazzi in?
I'm not a paparazzi! I'm...a crime scene photographer! Oh. Carry on. (Hell, now I have to stay here for the rest of the day.) Phoenix, find any evidence?
*drool* *drool*
Hi, Feenie!
Snap out if, Phoenix? Is there any evidence? Must...look...at...breasts... SNAP OUT OF IT! *slap*
AHHH! What? EVIDENCE! NOW!
Oh, yeah. I found a few yaoi magazines nearby, and a combination of blood and semen. (Ahh, my yaoi!) I'll need that evidence soon, Phoenix. Where did you find the blood and semen? It was on the beach. Easy explanation. Klavier and Apollo were...having some quality time...on the beach. Hmm...alone time... Well...keep looking, Phoenix. I'll take the body down to the morgue.*Morgue*
Well, Doc, what have you got on our vic?
His name's Ron. VICTIM. Oh, sorry. Well, he died from acute cyanide poisoni- I KNOW ALL THAT! He didn't die from that, did he? Well, this one did. *dead* (Note to self: talk to Gant after case is over.)*Interrogation Room*
Okay, ladies. You are the fangirl crowd accused of crushing Ron DeLite to death under your well-proportioned feet. 
*looking at pictures* Stop looking at your Apollo/Klavier pr0n and listen to me! *still looking* Wesley!
*comes and collects pictures* (Hmm...must remember to look at these later...) Now, my friend here will collect DNA swabs from your mouth. Why? There was no DNA evidence there because Strategydom was too lazy to write a longer funny. I don't know why he writes this stuff.
(Strategydom) Why don't you ask me yourself? EEEEEEEKKKKK! Mr. Gavin! Look at these pictures of your brother and your employee! (Strategydom) I'm not Kristoph goddammit! I'm leaving!*Strategydom leaves*
Alright, ladies. I'll have to collect your DNA, but since I seem to have...mislaid my swabs, I'll have to collect your DNA...another way. This way, please. *slap* Way to ruin my fun! Okay... STEEL SAMURAI! *slash* *slash* I'm not telling you anything. I NEED TO DEPEND ON YOU!!!!! TONIGHT, WE WILL DINE IN HELL! Fun? Hell, no! Why did it have to be those bunch of crazy chicks? Mr. Meekins, send these swabs down to the DNA lab for tests?
YES, SIR!*20 seconds later*
Here you are sir! We have found Ron DeLite's true killer, even though we had nothing to compare it to! Hmm...*Fade-Out* *Fade-In*
So, I finally have found the true killer of Mr. DeLite! *dead* Thought you escaped us when Gant took you away, raped and murdered you, didn't you? *grabs Larry's neck and moves him like a puppet* You don't have any proof! Ah, but yes, we do! See this hair? *back as Larry* That's...my...hair! It was found in Mr. DeLite's trousers! Proof enough for you...Mr. Butz!!!!! *as Larry* Ahhh....okay, I did it. After a passionate love-making session, he tripped and fell down the stairs. I hid his body and wanted to make it look like an accident. I slipped some viagra into Apollo and Klavier's drinks to make them head down to the beach, then dropped Ron-won's body in the path of a crowd of fangirls, whom I tipped off. I loved him...I just can't believe he's gone. Well, Mr. Butz, you'll have 16 to 20 years to think about it. Meekins, take him away.*Outside*
(
stand outside as two officers drag Larry's corpse away in slow-motion. His foot gets caught in the door of the police car.) Hey, Edgey, you all right? ...No. I just can't understand why he'd do such a thing... Isn't it obvious? He just told you his reasons! Are you trying to make this funny have an emotional and morally-questioning ending? No. *makes out with Phoenix**klik* *klik*
Yee-haw!!! I caught them at it! *still making out*
You wanted to talk to me, Worthy?
Oh-ho! Gayness! Time for a hot threesome! *Gant leaps on Phoenix and Miles* Stop the film! STOP THE FILM!Produced By Strategydom
Created By Strategydom
Written By Strategydom (poorly)
Illustrated By Strategydom (what illustrations?)
(Strategydom) And that is why there are pumpkins. 
...
(Little do they know...)
If a dog and a dolphin can get along, why can't our mom and dad?
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
~~
Gender: Female
Location: At my computer
Rank: Prosecutor
Joined: Tue Sep 02, 2008 9:03 am
Posts: 883
♥Twatanorm♥
Signature by blinq
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
Forget everything you have just read...
Gender: Male
Location: England.
Rank: Desk Jockey
Joined: Sat Sep 08, 2007 12:54 pm
Posts: 92
The witness was simply walking past the area in question!
Do you have proof of that, Mr. Payne? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!*Later, after court*
I swear I will kill Apollo Justice!Mysterious Figure: *shoots Payne*
*bleed, bleed* So, whatta we got here?
WHAAAAA!!! Why the hell are you crying? All the bad prosecutors are gone now! I will have only deviant and perfect foes in court now! Yeah, whatever. Dr. Hotti, cause of death please. He was shot. That's all? He was shot. You su- FOR HEAVEN'S SAKE MAN, HE WAS SHOT TO DEATH! We have our prime suspect here, sir. GOTCHA! He's dead! But I didn't do it! What does the scouter say about his power level? Below zero, sir.*At another crime scene*
*klik* *klik* *klik* *klik*
*dead* So, what would you say our cause of death was? I think she was strangled. Why do you think that?
SHOOP-DA-WOOP! Well, that was completely random. I'MA FIRING MA LAZORH!!!!! Someone call animal control, please.*DNA lab*
So, this is the DNA you found on the gun found at the crime scene? Yep. Hey, Edgeworth, I don't remember their being a gun at the crime scene. Shut the hell up, bitch. The DNA is a match to the convicted sex offender Gangster Badger. Hmm...*Interrogation Room*
You did it...didn't you!!!
Why would I kill some senile old prostitutor - Prosecutor. Prosecutor? (Payne as a prostitute....uh!)*Door opens and Gumshoe and Lotta walk in*
Hey, pal, whatta you doing with our suspect? Your suspect? He's OUR suspect! Well....his DNA was found inside our victim's vagina! .... ... .... Now yo know it wasn't me. Okay, then, how does this sound: you murdered Bikini and Payne! I'm not saying any more to yo. Damn!*Corridor*
I have an idea! We'll find a spirit medium who can summon Payne and/or Bikini and have them tell who killed them! Too young.
*staring at chest* Um...next!
Ah, you look fine. Get on with the channeling!! Hello, my friends. Mr. Payne, who killed you? Ah, you see, it is not as simple as that. First you must consider the fact that all the molecules of uncertainty in our universe are in a constantly changing pattern that must never be repeated, else the world collapse in on itself. Um...okay, then. Bikini time! *rushes in wearing a bikini* Did someone say bikinis! DO NOT WANT! I know who killed me!!!!! Who?*Interrogation*
We now you killed Winston Payne and Bikini. BIKINI? Get the hell out of here! I DID IT!!!!!! Bikini was my woman, when I saw her doing it with that wriggling piece of plywood (it creeped me out) and made by angry. I slaughtered my girlfriend, then spotted that bumbling prosecutor. Always strutting about like a constipated ostrich, so I killed him too!
IT'S FUN TO STAY AT THE Y M C A!!! Do you guys have to deal with this randomity every funny! Pretty much.*Apollo is arrested*
Mr. Edgeworth. We have a murder in Tres Bien! A big gay French dude was poisoned with his own semen! Got you. Let's go team!!! YES SIR!!!!!!!!Created by Strategydom
Directed By Strategydom
Produced By....Oh, crap, I forgot the rest!!!
IT'S FUN TO STAY AT THE Y M C A!!!!! SHOOP DA WOOP. BIKINI!!!!!! (Strategydom) DO NOT WANT!
If a dog and a dolphin can get along, why can't our mom and dad?
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
Can't object to his own testimony
Gender: None specified
Rank: Suspect
Joined: Mon Nov 24, 2008 4:05 am
Posts: 19
's hair points are covered in aluminum foil with wires connecting them to the TV.
: Turn to the left a bit, I'm getting Channel Five now!
: Don't you have cable, though?(dated joke)
: So what do you think about Red China? : It looks good against a white tablecloth.
"Lassie, shut your gob."
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
Proud owner of Luke Atmey.
Gender: Female
Location: Rockford, IL
Rank: Prosecutor
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Posts: 840
Your wound, Godot! It's bleeding!
The color red does not exist in my world...these must be my tears. No, I'm pretty sure it's blood...
It's blood.
Yeah, that's definately blood.
Blood.
Dammit.
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
Can't object to his own testimony
Gender: None specified
Rank: Suspect
Joined: Mon Nov 24, 2008 4:05 am
Posts: 19
If you can guess how many pennies are in my hand, you get to take me home! 5,842. Aah, close enough.
"Lassie, shut your gob."
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
~Formerly Phantom Dream
Gender: Female
Location: Everywhere and nowhere....BEING AWESOME
Rank: Decisive Witness
Joined: Mon Feb 16, 2009 1:42 am
Posts: 265
Nick, u can do it. i believe in u! Bye, mia hey, my tops real stretched out!i thought it was kinda funny.
Sad to say, I've left C-R. I may still occasionally come on, but, y'know...
I just lost interest, but, this is still an awesome site.
I'll live on through my sprites, I hope. And my major contributions to the Max fanclub. ^_^
Bye ;_; ^_^
I just lost interest, but, this is still an awesome site.
I'll live on through my sprites, I hope. And my major contributions to the Max fanclub. ^_^
Bye ;_; ^_^
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
OH, SNAP
Gender: Female
Location: At Lang's house.. at night
Rank: Decisive Witness
Joined: Fri Feb 27, 2009 11:42 am
Posts: 207
:Seventeen. Short skirt. You're hired:YAY_____________________
: Doctor, I have a problem. I can't remember anything.: How long have you had this problem?: What problem? _______________________
: What's white, steep, and has ears?: I don't know.: A snow-covered mountain.: What about the ears?: Haven't you ever heard of mountaineers?____________________________
:This is blasphemy, This is madness
:madness? This is SPARTA!_____________________
:what does the scouter say about Zeni's power level
:is over 9000!!
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWR!!!!!!
Gender: Male
Rank: Suspect
Joined: Fri Apr 04, 2008 10:44 pm
Posts: 25
Spoiler: Length
Imitation chocolate!
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
Wahoo! ~Klonoa
Gender: Male
Location: Breezegale
Rank: Medium-in-training
Joined: Thu Jan 31, 2008 3:22 pm
Posts: 524
- I have invented...THIS THING. - *random beep noises*
- What does it do? - I don't know! Stand in front of it. - Like this? Oh hey hey hey...*small* - IT WORKED. I AM ONE CAN SHORT OF A SIX PACK. MUWAHAHAHA!*lights go out*
- The lights! Who's there? - That thing I made! It's gone! Who could have penetrated my Impenetrable Fortress?
It is usually best to admit mistakes when they occur and to seek to restore honor.
WILL YAOI FOR CHAOS EMERALDS.
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
Gender: Male
Rank: Prosecutor
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Posts: 603
What are you doing here, Franziska? I'm Edgey's wife, of course.(MANY MILES AWAY)
What is it, master?
Nothing, I just sensed a disturbance in the force. As if suddenly, thousands of Edgey fangirls cried out in pain and were suddenly silenced.
PEARL DIES TONIGHT
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWR!!!!!!
Gender: Male
Rank: Suspect
Joined: Fri Apr 04, 2008 10:44 pm
Posts: 25
Spoiler: Length
Please take me back!
I said several limes! {raises two fingers} This is two limes!
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
Ask about my avatar for a chilling story
Gender: Male
Location: Ohio, the King of America
Rank: Prosecutor
Joined: Sun Jun 24, 2007 7:56 pm
Posts: 998
... ... ... ... ...
So uh... How's it- HI, IT'S VINCE WITH SHAMWOW, YOU'LL BE SAYING WOW EVERY TIME YOU USE THIS TOWEL. Um, I just needed to- NEED A DISPENSER HERE. YEAH, WHY DON'T YOU COME OVER HERE AND SAY THAT TO MY FACE, TOUGH GUY. I'M TAKING YOU IN, PAL. YOU'RE GETTING LIFE IN PRISON FOR THAT ONE. BUT I DIDN'T KILL ANYONE! THIS IS JUST MY RED SHAM- THE SANDMAN IS TOO DAMN OVERPOWERED. ... ... ...You got me. Throw on the cuffs and haul me away. But... What is it, perp? Do you have a boring tuna? Uh... Well, now that you mention it- STOP HAVING A BORING TUNA, STOP HAVING A BORING LIFE. STOP HAVING A BORING UPDATE.Oh, what better way to celebrate my return than with a crappy, plotless, and unfunny funny?
STOP HAVING A BORING FUNNY.Shut the fuck up, Vince. Stop having a boring life. Your life is so boring the only way you can have fun is to beat up hookers with your bat.
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
Forget everything you have just read...
Gender: Male
Location: England.
Rank: Desk Jockey
Joined: Sat Sep 08, 2007 12:54 pm
Posts: 92
---------------------------------------------
OBJECTION! Miles! What does the scouter say about his power level? It's under 2!!!!!! ....Expected.----------------------------------------------
What are you doing, Phoenix? *covers up PW Kink Meme* ...Nothing. Hmm...bye. Whew...anyway, back to hot Gumshoe/Grossberg/Gant fic writing! Hey, I have a comment for my Me/Edgeworth bondage fic!CravatKing42: I TOLD you not to tell people about that!!!!
Oh, Phoenix!!!! Time for a reenactment!!! DO NOT WANT!--------------------------------------------------------------
Um...I'd like the best girl in the house please.
For a buck? You can do the one in the corner! EDGEY-POO!!!!! ....No. Hey, are we being filmed! WHAT THE F--------------------5VGFENORE7CTWKRESTHXNERKWTYOHSHITe
45499999999999999999fjkmmmmmmmmmmvcxd,;ectw617dfvgdfn
3333333333332074030948204827drkjknslmcsakgsayurwrrww
We are experience technical problems. Please stand by.----------------------------------------
Expelliarmus! Avada Kedavra! Accio! Crucio! Semenejaculationonus! ... Avada Kedavra! *dead*---------------------------------
Um...any ideas for a new funny? No, sir. I've being drawing and writing for months. No new ideas. What's that you're working on? Oh, it's a monkey. Look! Monkey, monkey...monkey...mon...key? Relax, Stategydom. Remember the anger management classes. Put the knife down. So I guess you don't want to see Larry's monkey? Monkey, monkey, monkey! Monkey, monkey, monkey! AAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHH! *Bang, bang*
If a dog and a dolphin can get along, why can't our mom and dad?
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
You’re so small in such a big world...
Gender: Female
Location: In front of the computer, where else?
Rank: Ace Attorney
Joined: Sat Apr 26, 2008 2:25 am
Posts: 1720
Hey, Maya. Yeah? There's something I've been wanting to ask you for a long time, but I've always been too much of a coward to do it. (Oh, my God! He's going to propose! I should have seen this coming!) *kneeling* Maya, will you... Nick, I'd love to! Explain to Pearls that Iris is my "special someone?"
WHAAAAAAAAT?! C-Calm down, Maya! I swear, I...
Mr. Nick! How could you? *punches Phoenix* OW! Do it again, Pearly. (Why do I get the sinking feeling I'll feel this tomorrow?) Trucy, I never thought I'd say this, but...I... Guess what? You're related! Love you. Wait!
WHAT?!
You should have seen your face! Yeah. It looked something like that! What's going on? Did something happen while I was rehearsing my magic act? Nothing. Apollo and I were just having "the talk." Oh, okay then. *leaves*
Avatar drawn by MC_Kitten, edited by Slezak
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
Do you see the black one...or the white?
Gender: Male
Location: IN SPACE!
Rank: Ace Attorney
Joined: Tue Feb 27, 2007 12:06 pm
Posts: 6664
Geez Larry, it sure is great to get to hang around you after such a long hard day of putting up with Maya... um... why are we hanging out?
Well... you see... I've been wanting to ask you. You know that little girl that hangs around your sister all the time...? Sister? Larry, you've known for the longest time that I'm an only child, right? Okay okay, your girlfriend. LARRY! She's not my girlfriend either, she's a bit too young and has a lot of growing up to do. You just don't wanna date her because her knocker aren't up to par.
Larry, you're one to talk. You're in love with a nine year old. HEY! She understands me and we communicate great! Besides she's so adorable and cute and... LARRY PLEASE!!! I'm reminded so much as to why we don't hang out anymore. You seem so desperate to be hitting on such a small child. Y...You're right. But every girl I've gone out with has either dumped me for being incompetent or died! What's wrong with me Nick? First of all, you've got the hots for a little girl. Please find someone more your age first and then we'll talk. What about that big busty chick you always hung around with? What happened to her? She died..... a long time ago. Oh.... so does that mean she's not seeing anyone. That's it!!! I've had enough! I'm heading back to the office. I'd rather hear Maya talk about step ladders instead of hearing you talk about your love of small children and necrophilia. You're almost as bad as fanon Gant! Who?--------------------------------------hours later in Larry's Apartment--------------------------------------------------
*looking at a picture of Pearl* Oh... no one will ever understand our love um.... whatever your name is. Hello there Butzy boy! Who are you? Why, I'm the infamous Damon Gant! Nick told me about you!!!! You like to do bad things to every living creature... and inanimate objects too! Please don't defile my innocent body!!!! What are you.... are you confusing me with Fanon Gant?!?! Huh crude and disturbing. No... I'm nothing like him. I've heard about all your illegal dealings with a certain 9 year old girl and I'm here to make your arrest and by arrest I mean... *takes out knife* N....N....NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!---------------------------------------------20 minutes later---------------------------------------------------------
Hurry Maya!!!! We got to get to Larry's apartment!!! I've heard something really bad went down over there!!! Nick.... you really care for Larry, don't you. Does that mean you're... Maya, I swear. If you don't stop reading that horrendous fanfiction, I'll have to ground you from the internet. B...But you can't! You're not my mom.... or Mia!!!! Yes, but I could stop paying for the bills. I do make the money around here. And that's why we haven't had lunch in 3 days. What was that? Nothing Nick!!!!*at Larry's apartment*
Goodness!!! What happened here detective??? I mean..... Larry..... It's terrible pal. Mr. Butz here.... he....he's been the victim... the victim of.... Of what Mr. Gumshoe?!?! Of heartache pal. What? My... little... P...P...Pearly.... We found this knife at the scene of the crime. Apparently the victim here used it to cut up every last picture of some young little girl. Kinda looked like the one you two hang around with. Okay.... um... Larry, you alright? He... he told me everything Nick.... Who? Gant, Nick. Gant! Oh geez!!! This case has suddenly taken a turn for the worst! He told me... that Pearl... she...she...she has a boyfriend Nick! A boyfriend!!!! What? It's true!!! He had evidence and everything! There was no denying it!!! Is that it? I'm leaving. C'mon Maya. Let's both go drown ourselves in my office. I haven't paid this month's cable bill yet since I haven't had a decent case in a while, so don't be surprised if we can't watch the new episode of Pink Princess. This sucks Nick. WAIT NICK!!! COME GRIEVE WITH ME!!! I DON'T WANT TO BE ALONE!!!!! NICK!!!!!!!!!!! Well, I guess the case is solved. Let's head out boys. I'll never have anyone special. I'm destined to be alone.---------------40 years later-----------------------------------------------
Voice: Eventually she married the young boy she had been dating since Elementary School and moved off to become a famous Sanitation Engineer.
And that's how I became the broken man you see before you today.
But... wait. If you're Larry, then how did you... why did you....? C'mon. We both know the secret of time travel. It's not that secret anymore after all. So... what are you doing after this? Um... I just remembered a time period where there are a lot more attractive guys and less um... creepy old nuts like you!!! *leaves* NICK!!! Why weren't you there for me? Why weren't you there????!!!!
On April 3, 2016, Court Records Forums experienced a miracle upon that day.
I feel the same
CatMuto wrote:
Pierre wrote:
Man...that looks dull...this actually makes me worried for KH3 (since that team worked on the battle system)
I feel the same
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
Gender: None specified
Location: Newcastle Upon Tyne
Rank: Suspect
Joined: Thu Apr 30, 2009 6:07 pm
Posts: 35
Now for my first attempt at a funny.
Hey free boat ride for three, now who should I take?
Edgeworth And... Tigre
Yeah Yous'e better pick me But why Nick, why not meeeee!! Because Tigre sounds closest to T-Pain Aww
Aww Shi- 
E-edgeworth, why did you stop the song. We can't expose the readers of this funny to that sort of language Take a look through this topic, there's plenty of swearing Maybe, but not in such excess in the middle of a musical number. Well what can we do now since you ruined the funny. We could resort to the old jokes which have been done to death already. (sees Tigre making out with a mermaid) Edgy needs his alone time.
Well looks like the old classics creep in again. Anyway, what are you doing with the mermaid Furio. It's part of the song isn't it. "Believe me when I say, I fu-
Okay we get it.
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
Do you see the black one...or the white?
Gender: Male
Location: IN SPACE!
Rank: Ace Attorney
Joined: Tue Feb 27, 2007 12:06 pm
Posts: 6664
That's right! It's the sequel all two of you asked for! :D
Boob's Clues the Sequel
----------------------------------------------
*entering apartment* Ah. What a long day at the office. I'm just going to rest, take a shower and... *looks on the floor* What. Is. This? Is this a bra?..... Wha... *picks it up* What is a bra doin... *pops up from behind Edgeworth* Hey everybody!!! We found a bra! You know what that means?:random offscreen kids (ROK): We're going to play Blue's Clues!!!
Freakin' idiots!!! Wrong show! That show is crap! We're playing BOOB's Clues you nimrods! "Boob" as in women's knockers, as in... WRIGHT!!!! What are you doing in my house?!?!? Playing Boob's Clues of course. Everybody, this is my friend Mr. Shovel. He enjoys digging himself into holes. Don't get your act together and get out of my house, I'll be digging my foot up your... *sits on Edgeworth's bed and starts to sing* We gotta find the first Boob print, that's the first clue, put it in our Court Records because they're who's clues? BOOBS *fires a shot above Phoenix's head* I could care less if I spend life for killing you. It would be worth it. Looks like Mr. Shovel doesn't want us around. We should find a way to cheer him up. Any suggestions?:ROK: Dress him like a boy!!! He looks like a girl!!!
Huh. You kids are right. We could use Boob's Clues to find out what he should wear! *Points gun at Phoenix's unmentionables* You have until the count of 3.-------*at the mall*----------
Ok, so we have yet to find our first clue, but let's not fret and... *looks at a women's lingerie store* SWEET MERCY!!!! Look how many clues are in there!!!! *rushes in* Sir? Can I help you? How??? How did you obtain all these clues! This must mean something significant. *turns around* Hey kids, what does significant mean?:ROK: A clue? Magic? A Deus ex Machina?
No you ignorant simpletons. It means um... that we have lots of clues! Not just one!!! If you're thinking of purchasing a bra, these specialties come no less than $50. Wait... clues cost money? Erm... this uh... these must not be the right kind of clues. Sir. Are you drunk? Outta my way!!!! I got clues to find!!!!*meanwhile somewhere else in the mall*
And zen he says mai bruzzer zat he vants a sample of moi. So I says... Isn't that Wright? Huh? So, zat is ze Phoenix Wright....
I SHALL DEVOUR HIS VERY SOUL!!!! *throws a very looking effiminate shoe at Phoenix's direction, but it misses, knocking over the bra display* No!!!! My merchandise!!! Huh... how strange... wait a tic. There's a clue on this shoe. You know what that means kids???:ROK: Somebody is going to get arrested for tampering with merchandise*
Ha! It means we found our first clue!!! *draws on an etch-n-sketch* So.. lesse... we got a shoe and... we need to explore some more if we want to find out how to dress Mr. Shovel correctly and.... *sees Gant walking down towards him in the mall* Screw this, I'm investigating Mr. Shovel's apartment. There's bound to be clues in there.----------*at Edgey's pad*-----------
Hm... I'm pretty sure I'm ambigiously gay. Why would I have a bra in my apartment??? And why do I hear the shower running? *reaches for the bathroom door*Voice: Mailtime....
Did somebody say something?Voice: Mailtime.....
Come out! Whoever you are!!!Voice: MAILTIME!!!!! MAAAAILTIMEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!! *mailbox pops out and hits Edgey in the head, knocking him out cold and Phoenix pops in right behind it and starts singing*
OH! It's the mail it never fails it makes me want to jump and yell! When it comes I want kids to burn in hel... MAILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!! *opens it up and takes out a letter* Hm... this letter looks special. Hey look everyone, it's from our special friends over at the alleyway of 32nd and Weaselnut. Let's see how they are doing. *opens up letter and a video plays* Hey buddy. I got that hash that you've been wanting. Come by to pick it up tonight and I'll give you a discount. Just make sure to.... bring your little friend if you know what I mean? Why do I feel so jumpy. Hey look! I think my skin is coming off! *closes letter* Very informative indeed. Now let's take a look around Mr. Shovel's house and... WRIGHT! GET OUT!!!! THIS IS YOUR BRA, ISN'T IT?!?!? *opens bathroom door in a towel* No, it's mine. You said I could come over and shower since the water pipe broke at my place, remember? Heh... oh yeah... I forgot. You almost look like my friend Boob and... *gets cuffed* I overheard your little letter. You're coming to the precinct with me. Aren't you... um... not working for the cops? I... uh... had to do a few favors and... that's not important!!!! *leaves apartment with Phoenix in cuffs while still in her towel* Okay, I'm leaving this country. You want to know why I didn't appear in GS4? THIS IS THE ANSWER!!!! *screen fades to black*--------*at the Judge's house*-----------
:TV: And coming this summer, our brand new season of Boob's Clues starring Phoenix's um.... brother, Apollo!!!! You don't want to miss this!!!
Ugh... just won't be the same. He won't be as good as Phoenix I'll tell you what.
Honey, daddy is trying to sleep. *in the shadows* Can I finally go and..... Yes. You can go and kill him now that he's out of a job. You won't charge him for murder, will you Udgey-poo bear??? No Lord. I will worship you and the very ground you walk on... and my body which you will violate profusely. That's all I ask.
On April 3, 2016, Court Records Forums experienced a miracle upon that day.
I feel the same
CatMuto wrote:
Pierre wrote:
Man...that looks dull...this actually makes me worried for KH3 (since that team worked on the battle system)
I feel the same
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
Insanity at its classiest.
Gender: Male
Location: The Den of Transexual Beavers
Rank: Medium-in-training
Joined: Sun Oct 14, 2007 10:45 pm
Posts: 480
Wow, Apollo. I'm impressed. One game, and you've already got a huge following of fans. Oh, well, it's really nothing big, it was only my first game. Come on, don't be modest. Your fan fic writers have other ideas. My what? Yeah, you know, fan fics. Those stories people make about you, you know, fucking Klavier and stuff...
WHAT?! What'd I say? They said I had sex with Klavier?! Well, yeah. That's fan fiction for ya. Well, not only them. There's a bunch of gay porn of you out there. WHAT?! Why?! Do I come off as... gay?! Ah, don't worry about it, it happens to all the PW characters. Did it happen to you? Yup. They said I was gay for Edgeworth. ...But you are. THAT'S A DAMN LIE!
My CR family is my beautiful wife Arkillian, and my three daughters Lida_Rose, Franzika Von ehmpke5, angel_of_nature and my son, Meenyman.
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
Insanity at its classiest.
Gender: Male
Location: The Den of Transexual Beavers
Rank: Medium-in-training
Joined: Sun Oct 14, 2007 10:45 pm
Posts: 480
What's up, Nick? Whatcha think' about? I'm just thinking about how everyone is so fascinated by those gay guys from N-Sync. That was... 10 years ago, Nick. Maybe, but it seems like everyone is so obsessed with gay guys all of a sudden. Really? Like who?
Very strong point, there, Nick. But you forgot someone. Are you saying I'm gay?! No, Phoenix. I am. So, theoretically, my love for you over the past years has just been one gay affair? Yep. Works for me!
My CR family is my beautiful wife Arkillian, and my three daughters Lida_Rose, Franzika Von ehmpke5, angel_of_nature and my son, Meenyman.
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
Gender: None specified
Rank: Suspect
Joined: Thu Jul 09, 2009 2:51 am
Posts: 8
-----Phoenixes room-----
Oh maya Oh nick*Pearl walks in*
Mystic Maya, Mr.Nick, What are you......
: FEENIE Note too self, Find high cliff before Iris goes madLike i said, first attempt, so no harsh coments, and im not a perv, i jut thought itd be funny.
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
You’re so small in such a big world...
Gender: Female
Location: In front of the computer, where else?
Rank: Ace Attorney
Joined: Sat Apr 26, 2008 2:25 am
Posts: 1720
Iris, I want you to know that I... FEENIE! I'm not done with you yet! Ahhhhhhhh! Haha, I got you good. M-Maya?! What the-?! April fool~ So, what did you want to tell Iris? Nothing. You know, there is always a special place for you here at the clinic, hm, yes. 
I will kill you slowly. I will always love you. Hm, yes. You're my favorite patient. 
Stay away!!! Whips, huh? We all have our preferences. Ho ho ho.
Avatar drawn by MC_Kitten, edited by Slezak
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
You've been hit by, a smooth prosecutor
Gender: Male
Location: Somewhere you're not
Rank: Ace Attorney
Joined: Wed Aug 13, 2008 9:07 am
Posts: 3394
Zorzay wrote:
Okay, i only read up too page four, so sorry if i copy. This is my first attempt:
-----Phoenixes room-----
Oh maya
Oh nick
*Pearl walks in*
Mystic Maya, Mr.Nick, What are you......
: FEENIE
Note too self, Find high cliff before Iris goes mad
Like i said, first attempt, so no harsh coments, and im not a perv, i jut thought itd be funny.
-----Phoenixes room-----
Oh maya Oh nick*Pearl walks in*
Mystic Maya, Mr.Nick, What are you...... : FEENIE Note too self, Find high cliff before Iris goes madLike i said, first attempt, so no harsh coments, and im not a perv, i jut thought itd be funny.
Kind of lost me on this one
Did Iris walk in with Pearl? Or did Pearl walk in on a 3... no that ain't it.
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
Just a random passerby
Gender: Male
Location: Hyrule
Rank: Prosecutor
Joined: Sun Mar 16, 2008 4:42 pm
Posts: 623
My name is Luke Atmey. I am a great ace detective. It's been 2 years since I killed Kane Bullard. I was pardoned for some reason. Now, I will restore my Ace Detective Title. ZVARRIPoliceman: OK Atmey, you're free to go. But we'll be wacthing you, so don't even think about commiting any crimes.
But of course, sir policeman. Now I'll be on my way. 2 hours later
Oh man, what a day, Wish I had a customer. Well Well, how do you do Mr. Wright.
Huh, that voice sounds very familar. ZVARRI! Why, if it isn't Luke Atmey. Yes, it is I, the great Luke Atmey. I see your not suprised that I'm out of jail. I read about your release. And while I forgot a lot of names, there's no way I can forget yours. Look at me. Indeed. And I read about you being disbarred. I guess you can't win all the time, Sir Hobo. Now my great detective skills tell me that you are a "pianist." I see you're detective skills haven't rusted Mr. Atmey. So what clued you in. My hat. Actually, there was some people complaining about how horrible some pianist was. Once I saw you, It became obvious that you had to be that pianist. I also deduced that your not really a pianist either. So what do you do. Impressive Mr. Atmey. I am a poker player. So, you're a poker player, are you. Then, ZVARRI, lets see what you're made of. I'm suprised you play poker Mr. Atmey. But of course I play. 1 hour later
Very good, Mr. Hobo. You defeated me. You were the first person that I didn't beat in 10 minutes. Indeed. I must leave now Mr. Hobo. I have to repair my Ace Detective reputation after all. Then you better not kill or blackmail anyone, Luke. Not to worry, The police are watching me. Now I, Luke Atmey, will bid you farewell. ZVARRI.
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
Gender: None specified
Rank: Suspect
Joined: Thu Jul 09, 2009 2:51 am
Posts: 8
Johnny Rotan wrote:
Zorzay wrote:
Okay, i only read up too page four, so sorry if i copy. This is my first attempt:
-----Phoenixes room-----
Oh maya
Oh nick
*Pearl walks in*
Mystic Maya, Mr.Nick, What are you......
: FEENIE
Note too self, Find high cliff before Iris goes mad
Like i said, first attempt, so no harsh coments, and im not a perv, i jut thought itd be funny.
-----Phoenixes room-----
Oh maya Oh nick*Pearl walks in*
Mystic Maya, Mr.Nick, What are you...... : FEENIE Note too self, Find high cliff before Iris goes madLike i said, first attempt, so no harsh coments, and im not a perv, i jut thought itd be funny.
Kind of lost me on this one
Did Iris walk in with Pearl? Or did Pearl walk in on a 3... no that ain't it. My mistake, I would have too say Iris walked in a few seconds after pearl.Yay an attempt at an edgey alone time comic:
- Go away, edgey needs his alone time -Not this again - You have an office, Go in there Mr.nick, dont be so mean to mr.edgeworth -Pearly, You just dont understand, GET OUT OF THE BATHROOM EDGEWORTH Mystic maya!5 hours later
- That was great, guess what, i was mas..... THERES A KID IN THE ROOM Willl i ever Get too finish?
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
defence
Gender: None specified
Rank: Suspect
Joined: Sun Jun 28, 2009 4:50 pm
Posts: 6
i like pie. that is a lie! im the only one who likes pie in the games!
NNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!
BLLLLLAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRG! 
*still banging head* i shal rule the world! this is the weirdest trial ever. yep.everyone forgot about me. (thats cuz your not talking)
*bursts in* reporting for duty, sir!
one lock to break. no you are not reporting for duty!you are here to testify!all locks broken. ok, i lied.im here to testify. PAY ATTENTION TO ME! AND ME! BBBBBBBLLLLLLLLLAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRGGGGHHHHHH!!! (oh,so thats what he meant.)TO BE CONTINUED
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
defence
Gender: None specified
Rank: Suspect
Joined: Sun Jun 28, 2009 4:50 pm
Posts: 6
i saw the guy murder him whith a knife.thats all.
THATS ALL?!? WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!another testimony? ok, ill stop banging my head. (he didnt realise it was a short one)
i saw the guy murder him whith a knife.thats all.
THAT IS NOT TRUE! THE REPORT SAID THERE WAS NO WITNESSES! WEEEEEEEEBBBBBBBBLLLLLAAARGGGGGGGGGHHHHWEEEEEEEEE! ok. im done. ill have my time now. (good. cuz u were annnoying)
I AM TEH SPOT OF DOOMZ!
i am a cookie. THIS....IS GETTING.....TOO.......WEIRD.... AAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRROOOOOOGGGGGGAAAAAAAHHHHHHWSKLXKDMC IM BACK!BBBBBBBBLLLLLLLLAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHFIIFKDLCJ ILL JOIN IN! AASEKDJLSHCKASDJEKJCMDKJFDKMCDKFJDKX.SCS/AZSL CUT THE FILM! CUT!please wait.........
WWWWWAAAAAAAAATTTT!?!?!?! THAT FILM WAS HILARIOUS!*random channel*
BUY OUR BEEF JERKY KNOW!*film back on*
..................what do i say? you say:AAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!! oh, thanks. AAAAAAAAARRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! im evil. i am teh spam smiley! ok i had enough.... WEIRD!..............IMMAH FIRING MAH OBJECTION! TO BE CONTINUED.....
AGAIN?!? AWW, CMON!
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
Lack of sleep sucks...
Gender: Male
Location: Between the Stairway to Heaven and the Highway to Hell.
Rank: Decisive Witness
Joined: Sun Jul 29, 2007 8:54 pm
Posts: 293
Oh! I left an itallian sausage in the oven at home! I have an italian sausage right here!... In my pants!------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What if we have a daughter and- Regardless. We're not having a daughter. Well what if we have a son and he wants to join dance class while his friends join football? He can dance if he wants to. He can leave his friends behind. ..... Cause his friends don't dance and if they don't dance, then they're no friends of mine!------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I don't get it. What's so great about the Ace Attorney games. Thet're not even funny! Okay. There are plenty of reasons that the people in this game are funny! Manfred Von Karma!? What the bloody hell are you doing here!? I was sentenced to community service by explaining how people are funny. Like you, for example are funny when you're up on your high horse or being sarcastic. Maya is funniest when she's a repetitive train wreck. *walks up to Godot* Godot sells it with a cocky attitude. Well, you know. I do what I do and I do what I do. Gant is ammusing because, quite frankly, he's insane. *walking by* Look! I made shoes for my rabbit. And Alice here... Well... He can do alright in a case. I'm assuming that you're calling me by a girl's name because I locked you up, right? And because it's your middle name. Damn... Now, sadly, some people just aren't funny. BUT! They have funny names. For example: Guy Eldoon, Acro, Bat, Dick Gumshoe, and Apoling Justice. HEY! My bad. Apolo Justice. Larry Butz is a sexual deviant. *Sniffs Maya while she stretches) Machi is an immagrant, witch is hilarious to me, and Payne is the series' sad-sack. I am? Yes. Awwww.... And me? I'm funny because I commit. C-O-M-M-I-T-T-T-T-T-T...T... I also created a monster of a daughter and severely jacked you up in the head. There's only one guy who's funny, no matter what he says. *Walking by* Are my new boxers made of wool? Cause my weesle's getting heat stroke! *walks away* Okay! Back to your cell! Finally. *leaves* I'm not a sad-sack, am I? Payne, your pen exploded. Awww.... *looks at ink covered hand* AWWWWWW!!!!!
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
If you don't know who is the Shmoo look
Gender: None specified
Location: Puerto Rico
Rank: Desk Jockey
Joined: Thu Jul 23, 2009 10:30 pm
Posts: 61
:I was mas- 
:We know that!When edgey says i was mas-
he get interrupted!What he say?
I think he says i was mask de masque.
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
If you don't know who is the Shmoo look
Gender: None specified
Location: Puerto Rico
Rank: Desk Jockey
Joined: Thu Jul 23, 2009 10:30 pm
Posts: 61
My first Smiley Comic!
:Please no rude comments!!!! 
:... :Why the parrot is not talking!
:She will only talk to me! THIS IS MADNESS! :Madness? 
:THIS IS SPARTA!!!!! :.... :Can you all SHUT UP! :... 
:AAAAARRRGGGG!!!7 years later...
:An that why I become a hobo! :(He is lying!)
:You are lying! :I am a man of truth i never lie.
:Think Apollo...THINK!!!!! :... :A snackoo! :(Now is my change!) : :Oh noes! :I out of ideas...THE END
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
If you don't know who is the Shmoo look
Gender: None specified
Location: Puerto Rico
Rank: Desk Jockey
Joined: Thu Jul 23, 2009 10:30 pm
Posts: 61
Spoiler: Apollo Justice and the secret weapon
:I'm the secret weapon!
:*Klavier's music plays*
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
I am Kasu, hear me roar
Gender: Female
Location: The only city where you can be a loud rabid fangirl and still be one of the masses - NYC!
Rank: Medium-in-training
Joined: Mon Sep 29, 2008 9:41 pm
Posts: 332
F34r T4h Shm00 wrote:
Spoiler: Apollo Justice and the secret weapon
hah i want to see the next eppie!
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
If you don't know who is the Shmoo look
Gender: None specified
Location: Puerto Rico
Rank: Desk Jockey
Joined: Thu Jul 23, 2009 10:30 pm
Posts: 61
Spoiler: Apollo and the secret weapon 2
:LOL
:It answer you fool!
:DIE!
:It over 90000000000!!!!
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
You’re so small in such a big world...
Gender: Female
Location: In front of the computer, where else?
Rank: Ace Attorney
Joined: Sat Apr 26, 2008 2:25 am
Posts: 1720
Spoiler: AJ Angst Part 1
Peas and carrots. Peas and carrots.Avatar drawn by MC_Kitten, edited by Slezak
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
If you don't know who is the Shmoo look
Gender: None specified
Location: Puerto Rico
Rank: Desk Jockey
Joined: Thu Jul 23, 2009 10:30 pm
Posts: 61
Spoiler: The adventures of Apollo!
:No bro! Don't die!
:...defense attorney!
:YAY!
:I can't go because i sick.
:DUDE!!!!!
:My son.
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
If you don't know who is the Shmoo look
Gender: None specified
Location: Puerto Rico
Rank: Desk Jockey
Joined: Thu Jul 23, 2009 10:30 pm
Posts: 61
Spoiler: I can't think of a tittle
:Look like you wanna die without even noticing you will die?
:Hi mr.Wright!
:For the look of your face I can tell
:Do you scientifically understand?Edit:It will not contiune
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
If you don't know who is the Shmoo look
Gender: None specified
Location: Puerto Rico
Rank: Desk Jockey
Joined: Thu Jul 23, 2009 10:30 pm
Posts: 61
Spoiler: 3-5
--Phoenix is wrong--
:Objection! :You forgot something Wright! :What? : :I am wrong? :Omg I wrong! :I tell yo Mr.Wrong! :(I hate you Edgeworth!)--Stare Time--
:... :(I domed)
:WRITHO! :MUST RUN AWAY! 
:YAY! :... :(He got me!) :I stare at your soul! :AACCCKKK!!!--The next day--
:Oh dad... :An that why I become a hobo!
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
If you don't know who is the Shmoo look
Gender: None specified
Location: Puerto Rico
Rank: Desk Jockey
Joined: Thu Jul 23, 2009 10:30 pm
Posts: 61
Spoiler: The Epic Smiley comic Part 1!
:Lives with the shmoo!
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
ALL GLORY TO... SOMETHING
Gender: Male
Location: Not in a courtroom, that's where.
Rank: Prosecutor
Joined: Fri Apr 24, 2009 6:44 pm
Posts: 914
Spoiler: 2-4
Re: Phoenix Wright Funnies
Forget everything you have just read...
Gender: Male
Location: England.
Rank: Desk Jockey
Joined: Sat Sep 08, 2007 12:54 pm
Posts: 92
Another boring day. Let's take a good at my to-do list. 1 = Write new funny. In progress. 2 = Order yuri doujin. Done soon. 3 = Feed the Gant. Gumshoe! Yes, sir? Feed the Gant. ...Okay. Come on Pearly, you're going to go and see Gant!
Yay! Ah, the innocence of youth. 4 = Kill Gumshoe. Easy enough. Come hither! Ye-*stab* *dead* Okay, now let's order these yuri comics....Wait, only Gumshoe knew the website! And now he's dead! It appears I will have to travel back in time. As much as I don't want to, I have to speak to the most knowledgeable person I know.*Scene trasition*
U wAnt to VU MI l33t tym m0chynEEE?
Yes. And noww I haxxorZZZ mI l33t aSSiStets!
Ta-da! This time machine works using a special blend of science and- Magic! SCIENCE! MAGIC! SCIENCE! Oh, forget this. *Takes time machine**Insert cool warpy sound effects.*
And here we are, back to this morning in my office.Past
Ah, the innocence of youth. 4 = Kill Gumshoe. Easy enough. Come hither! Don't. *Kills past self.*Past
*dead*:violin* I really hope I don't get killed by doing this.
*Heads back in time.*
Ah! What's this! You are under arrest for the murder of yourself! I you come quietly, WE WILL NOT USE FORCE. Is there anybody else here? No...just m-*knocked out* Must...stop self from stopping self killing Gumshoe!*Travels back in time.*
Past
Ah, the innocence of youth. 4 = Kill Gumshoe. Easy enough. Come hither!Past
Do-*is killed* Perfect. Now back to my own time. Um, why is my office covered in pictures of Gumshoe? Sir, you are not wearing your Blue Badger costume!!! Dare I ask? Under orders of the Sexiest And Hottest Man Alive With The Largest Penis, Lord Gumshoe!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! *slaughters everyone in the country*. ...Must...travel back in time...*One more time travel...ah...*
*opens eyes* Hmm...I appear to be back to normal. Here's my to-do list, and my computer. Gumshoe! Yes, sir? I'VE NEVER BEEN SO DELIGHTED TO SEE YOUR FACE! Okay...I'll just walk away now...Oh, and by the way, King Manella wants to see you. Oh, hell...:manella: Y HALO THERE! cUm have KINKI SECKS WIT MEE, BI0TCHEZ!!!
& 
Yes, master!!! Sex, now!!! DONOTWANT! If you think that's disturbing, wait 'till you see what he does with me...
If a dog and a dolphin can get along, why can't our mom and dad?
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