ZAWA ZAWA
Gender: Female
Location: Bristol, Rhode Island
Rank: Decisive Witness
Joined: Tue May 14, 2013 10:21 pm
Posts: 172
I apologize for the delay, but some things came up that I couldn't get out of. Better late than never, right?
Title-
Shattered Psyche Rating-
This fic is, well… unrealistic. But it certainly could've been worse. This one seemed fun to spork and I also needed practice writing Franziska. The fic isn't really a Christmas fic, but rather takes place at Christmas. So yes, there were some other fics I could've chosen, but six or seven of them were rehashes of the Christmas Carol with Edgeworth and one with Franziska. Since Pessimistic already sporked one, I decided not to touch any of them. I figured this one would be more interesting.
Now, let's begin!
Today's sporkers are…
Miles Edgeworth! "…I should've known this long break wouldn't last."
Maya Fey! "Ooh Nick, look! Tinsel! A-And gingerbread cookies!"
Phoenix Wright! "As long as there aren't any mistletoe around…"
and…
Franziska von Karma! "Any mistletoe around and the management will be looking forward to a mouthful of whip for Christmas."
[The sporking theatre is decked out in full Christmas attire. A Christmas tree is in the corner, lights flickering and presents under a tree. Stockings are hung along a wall with a table full of goodies right underneath, and a fake Santa with some of his elves are occupying a few seats in the back. Lastly, there is literal snow on the floor. Sadly, there is no mistletoe.] Franziska: Thank goodness.
Speakers:
The management will keep that in mind for next time. Thanks for the suggestion! *crack*
Phoenix: A-Agh! W-What was that for!?
Franziska: You're the one who brought up the mistletoe in the first place, Phoenix Wright!
Phoenix: …R-Right. I'm honestly more concerned w-with how cold it is in here right now.
Maya: Aw Nick, it's not too bad! Look, there's even hot chocolate to keep us warm!
[Phoenix eagerly goes to the table and grabs a mug of hot chocolate while Edgeworth and Franziska take their seats.] Edgeworth: Hmm, it seems that the presents under the tree have our names on them.
Franziska: Hah. How old do they think we are? I see that Maya Fey has the biggest present of all.
[Phoenix and Maya return from the snack table. Maya has a big stack of gingerbread men and Christmas tree brownies piled high on a plate. She nearly drops her snacks at the mention of presents.] Maya: Presents? For me? Ooh, can we open them now? I want to open them now!
Speakers:
You all have to wait until after the sporking. If you try to peek, then we'll keep your present. We're talking to you, Maya. Maya: Aww...
Speakers:
Now, let's get started! Quote:
Shattered Psyche
By: Lamia of the Dark
Franziska: What a foolish name.
Maya: I dunno, maybe it kind of fits?
Phoenix: …I'm not sure how I'm supposed to feel about reading a Christmas fic written by someone "of the dark."
Edgeworth: I'm not sure how I am supposed to feel about a Christmas story titled "Shattered Psyche."
Maya: Maybe it's a fic about us breaking psyche-locks?
Phoenix: I doubt it, Maya.
Quote:
DISCLAIMER: Phoenix Wright belongs to Capcom and is being used here without permission.
- Shattered Psyche -
6:37 a.m., December 23, Manfred von Karma's office
Edgeworth: Nngh! This isn't how a Christmas story should start!
Maya: But Mr. Edgeworth, it's not Christmas yet! Look, it's only December 23rd.
Franziska: …What do you mean by that, little brother? Did you not like spending time in my papa's office?
Edgeworth: N-Not for Christmas, no.
Quote:
Edgeworth stands in the doorway.
"Franziska's coming for Christmas," he says in a bored tone. "And to gloat over her latest victories in person, no doubt."
Franziska: Hmph. I'm sure I would chastise you for your imperfect record instead.
Phoenix: (Knowing Franziska, she'd probably do both.)
Franziska: I see what you're thinking, Phoenix Wright. It's written all over your foolish face.
Phoenix: (She… didn't whip me?)
Franziska: Don't count yourself lucky.
Quote:
9:45 p.m., Christmas Eve, von Karma house, guest room
Maya: That's it!? What was the point of that scene?
Edgeworth: I believe it was to tell us that Franziska is coming for Christmas. Although, they could've told us that in a more relevant scene.
Phoenix: Or they could've just made the scene longer and more interesting.
Maya: Yeah! I mean, the first line was "Edgeworth stands in the doorway." Boring!
Quote:
She is sitting at the desk, reading, oblivious to the presence of another person in the room.
"Merry Christmas, Franziska."
She looks up.
BANG.
Phoenix: What fantastic sound effects!
Maya: Well, that's kind of how they are in the games.
Speakers:
The management would like to remind Maya Fey that breaking the fourth wall is strictly prohibited. Seriously, do you want us to take away your present? Maya: N-No! I'll be good, I promise!
Phoenix: (…The day we beg to the management. What have we come to?)
Franziska: You fools are forgetting about the most important thing here! Wasn't I just shot?
Maya: Dunno. Probably. If you're killed, I bet it's Mr. Edgeworth. I sensed animosity when he spoke to Mr. von Karma earlier.
Phoenix: …Do you want to take that bet?
Maya: You're on, Nick!
Quote:
The chair falls over backward, leaving her body lying in a crumpled heap on the floor. There is blood everywhere.
Edgeworth: Well, I suppose that answers that question.
Franziska: Grr…! *pulls whip taut* Who would dare to murder me!? My papa will find them guilty in court!
Phoenix: Well, uh, on the bright side, you're not in this fic anymore!
Franziska: Hmph, you're right. Perhaps I can relax and enjoy watching my murderer's punishment. *puts whip to the side* Maya Fey, hand me a cookie.
Maya: Uh, sure…
Quote:
10:30 p.m., Christmas Eve, von Karma house
Manfred discovers Franziska's body, calls the police, and is promptly arrested for her murder.
Phoenix: We're already onto a new scene?
Franziska: And papa was arrested for my murder? That's preposterous! Whoever decided to arrest him should be fired!
Edgeworth: I'm assuming that I'm going to be the prosecutor...
Quote:
10:45 p.m., unknown location, Christmas party
Maya: Why are these scenes so short!? Is the whole fic in two sentence scenes?
Edgeworth: I sure hope not. If it was, I believe the management would've given this more than two Sahwits.
Quote:
Edgeworth's cell phone rings at almost the exact same instant as Phoenix Wright's.
Phoenix: Are we both at a Christmas party? Why would I go to a Christmas party in an unknown location? Sounds pretty creepy to me...
Edgeworth: Honestly Wright, I can imagine seeing you go to such a thing in the middle of nowhere of which you know nothing about.
Phoenix: H-Hey!
Edgeworth: Nevertheless, a better question to ask is why I would bother going to a Christmas party at all.
Maya: Ooh, I know! You really
are the killer and you're going to a party to make yourself look less suspicious!
Phoenix: If anything, I think that would make him look
more suspicious…
Quote:
Both calls are about the same case. Both men agree to take it on.
Phoenix: Wait a minute, I'm a private law firm! Because of that, I shouldn't get the call at the same time as Edgeworth. Also, I normally wouldn't agree to take on a case unless I've met the defendant beforehand.
Franziska: That's unimportant! Miles Edgeworth! Why would you agree to prosecute papa's case? After all he's done for you!
Edgeworth: Well, this is only fic-me… (And that didn't stop him from prosecuting my trial...)
Quote:
11:50 p.m., Christmas Eve, Gourd Lake
Maya: *sips hot chocolate* Cookies, Nick?
Phoenix: Sure. Thanks, Maya.
Maya: How 'bout you, Mr. Edgeworth?
Edgeworth: No, thank you.
Quote:
A murder is taking place. It is of little consequence. The victim is Robert Hammond. The only suspect is Yanni Yogi, who (despite Winston Payne's incompetence as a prosecutor) will be convicted at his trial.
Phoenix: *shoves cookie in mouth* I'd like to see
that happen.
Quote:
10:00 a.m., Christmas, Manfred's Trial
Maya: I sure hope his trial is more than three sentences long.
Phoenix: Maybe the three sentences will be equivalent to the three minutes that von Karma wanted Edgeworth's trial to last.
Maya: Yeah, then he'd get a taste of his own medicine!
*crack*
Phoenix: Yowch!
Quote:
The judge seems duly surprised that Edgeworth is prosecuting his own mentor's trial. Somehow, Phoenix is not surprised.
He knows this isn't going to be easy. There weren't any witnesses at the scene so after the evidence is introduced, the only person Edgeworth will be able to call to the stand is Manfred himself. Phoenix already knows that Manfred's alibi won't hold up in court, because he has no proof of where he was between the time he left the Prosecutor's Office that night and the time he called the police.
Franziska: My papa would never hire such a third-rate and foolishly foolish defense attorney!
Phoenix: And I would never defe… *glances at Franziska* Uh, wow, looks like I'm out of hot chocolate! I'd better go get some more!
Speakers:
Sit down.Phoenix: Y-Yes sir…
Quote:
Phoenix is relying on a risky strategy.
Edgeworth: That's not surprising.
Maya: Yeah, but is there anything Nick
hasn't done?
Franziska: There's always something new with the man. What's worse is that he's using such a risky move with my papa's defense!
Phoenix: Uh, well, no risk no glory?
Edgeworth: I believe the phrase is "no risk, no reward."
[Phoenix tries to find something wrong with the detective's testimony, but ends up only confirming that the weapon belonged to Manfred and that he had the opportunity to commit the murder.]Franziska: Of course it's the one time that Scruffy doesn't mess up his testimony.
Edgeworth: In that case, it's probably a different detective.
Quote:
Manfred is glaring at Phoenix as the detective leaves the stand. Phoenix glances nervously at his client. Yes, Edgeworth has him on the fence here. But Phoenix has an ace in the hole. Of course, it all depends on Maya…
Maya: On me? Aw, Nick~! I finally get to help in a trial!
Phoenix: You're always helpful during a trial. (OK… most of the time.)
Maya: Oh, that's right! But this time it
depends on me.
Phoenix: (Yikes!)
Quote:
"As there were no witnesses to the crime, the prosecution now calls the accused, Manfred von Karma, to the stand."
Now's the time to raise an objection. Phoenix slams his hands on his desk, then points his finger (in that special way he has of doing just that) and shouts "OBJECTION!"
Everyone in the courtroom turns to look at him.
"The defense requests to hear the testimony of the victim herself!"
All…
Franziska: What kind of foolishly foolish farce is this!? I will not stand for such foolishness in the court room!
Phoenix: I… I have a bad feeling about this…
Quote:
"The victim…?" The judge asks faintly. He is clearly confused. "Mr. Wright this is a murder trial."
"I know that," Phoenix replies, with a cocky grin. "But I just so happen to have a spirit medium with me…"
Edgeworth: Hmph, how ridiculous. No court of law should allow such a person to testify. Besides, they should know what happened in the past.
Phoenix & Maya: …
Quote:
"This is highly irregular," the judge says. "But if the prosecution has no objection to this…"
Phoenix hasn't learned much about the DL-6 incident at this point in time and doesn't know about Edgeworth's feelings on spirit mediums. (Namely, that he thinks they're all phony.) Even so, he's not that surprised when he hears Edgeworth say, "I have no objection, but the prosecution refuses to acknowledge the witness unless the defense can prove beyond a reasonable doubt that it is indeed Franziska von Karma."
Edgeworth: …
Phoenix: Well, you didn't object, so…
Edgeworth: The only justifiable reason I can think of is to make you look like an idiot.
Phoenix: And that's
justifiable?
Edgeworth: Yes.
Quote:
"Is that so, Miles Edgeworth?"
The voice comes from the witness stand. No one noticed Maya slipping out from behind the defense bench while they were deciding whether or not to allow Franziska's spirit as a witness.
Edgeworth stares in shock. The body may be Maya Fey's, but that voice is definitely Franziska's. And if he has any doubts about her identity, they vanish as he watches her hand close into a fist as if she is reaching for something that isn't there. Her whip, of course, but there's no way Maya would have known that. It is obvious from the expression on Manfred's face that he had no clue Phoenix was planning to do something like this, either.
"Th-the prosecution is satisfied that this witness is the victim," Edgeworth says nervously.
Maya: Oh wow, look. Ms. von Karma still wants her whip even in death!
Franziska: Of course I do. That way, I'll be able to whip some sense into the morons running this court.
Phoenix: Sure… Anyway, I bet Edgeworth doesn't believe that all spirit medium are phony now.
Edgeworth: It seems that fic-me's plan has backfired miserably.
Quote:
"Did you two know each other?" the judge asks in surprise, looking curiously between the witness and the prosecutor.
Edgeworth: Honestly, if His Honor was surprised that I was prosecuting my own mentor's trial, then it should be obvious that I would've met his daughter at some point.
Phoenix: Yeah, but he's
our Judge.
Edgeworth: …True.
Quote:
Edgeworth quickly regains his composure and replies calmly, "I'm sure you're aware that the defendant was, at one time, my mentor. Of course I was acquainted with his daughter, as well."
"Alright, then. The court accepts this witness. Ms. von Karma, please testify about the night of the murder."
Franziska's testimony consists of only three short statements.
Franziska: Hm, short and concise. If only all witnesses could keep their testimonies like this.
Edgeworth: Agreed. It would make our job much easier.
Phoenix: Hey Edgeworth, are you sure you don't want to hear Oldbag talk up a storm?
Edgeworth: *glare*
Quote:
"I was in the guest room, reading. I didn't notice anyone come in.
He spoke to get my attention and I looked up.
Then he shot me."
All: …
Phoenix: Well that felt useless.
Franziska: Why didn't I say who my murderer was!?
Maya: Maybe you didn't see them?
Franziska: Preposterous! Someone such as myself wouldn't be murdered without knowing who killed me!
Quote:
Phoenix presses at the second statement.
"You looked up…? So you must have seen the killer. Please state his name for the court."
"I can't," Franziska replies, looking away.
"You… can't?" Phoenix asks, sweating bullets.
"No."
Franziska: There's no way I would be so foolish as to cover for my own murderer! Especially if papa's being accused.
Edgeworth: …
Quote:
Phoenix moves on to the third statement and presses there.
"You said 'he' shot you. So we know the killer was a man. Can tell us anything else to shed light on the killer's identity?"
Before she can answer, Edgeworth raises an objection.
"The witness has already testified that she cannot identify the killer. If you have no other questions, I'm afraid we'll have to ask her to step down…"
Phoenix looks over the testimony again. He decides to press on the first statement, just to see what kind of information comes up.
"What were you reading?"
"The case file for my next trial," Franziska replies without hesitation.
Phoenix: And here I thought that you were actually reading an interesting book.
Franziska: Any one of my cases is plenty interesting. A von Karma doesn't slack off like some foolish defense attorney that I know of.
Phoenix: Hey! I do paperwork and stuff!
Maya: Pfft.
Phoenix: I do!
Maya: Sure, Nick.
Quote:
"The victim was also a prosecutor," Edgeworth explains. "The case file was found out the scene." He presents a bloodstained file folder. "From the parts we could decipher, we were able to determine the case itself has nothing to do with the victim's own murder."
The judge looks over the folder's contents briefly and dismisses it as evidence.
Phoenix goes over the remaining two statements again, and presses at the third.
"How much time passed between the time you looked up and the time he shot you?"
Finally, an intelligent question, Edgeworth thinks to himself sarcastically. Not that it's going to get you anywhere.
Phoenix: All of my questions were intelligent.
Edgeworth & Maya: Not really.
Phoenix: Well it's not my fault that the witness hardly gave us any information.
*crack*
Phoenix: A-Argh!
Franziska: If I were to give testimony, it would be perfect. It's not my fault that the author decided to write my character like that!
Phoenix: I never said it
was your fault!
Quote:
"Maybe I didn't make myself clear," Franziska replies, sounding a little irritated. "He had the shot lined up before he caught my attention. The only thing out of position was… me. When I looked up, he pulled the trigger."
"The defense requests that the witness amend her testimony!"
The third statement now reads: "He shot me as soon as I looked up." Phoenix doesn't press there. He backtracks to the second statement and presses there, asking the question he ignored the first time through.
"What did he say to you?"
Franziska hesitates. The courtroom is deadly silent.
"He said 'Merry Christmas, Franziska'."
Everyone in the courtroom turns to look at Edgeworth.
Edgeworth: …Why is everyone looking at me?
Maya: I know! They all telepathically know that you're the killer!
Edgeworth: Please don't entertain impossible scenarios like that.
Maya: It's not impossible. Have you ever played 999?
Phoenix: That's just a game, Maya.
Maya: So?
We're just a g-g-great people with… supernatural powers!
Speakers:
Hm, nice save. But it could've been better.Quote:
"Right?" the prosecutor asks.
The witness nods once in affirmation.
"How… do you know that…?" Phoenix croaks out. He has a nasty feeling that he already knows the answer.
Edgeworth: So it was me who said that line before? It would've been nice if it was said beforehand.
Quote:
"Because I'm the one who shot her," Edgeworth replies with a sadistic smile.
Maya: So I was right! Pa-
Edgeworth: …I've changed my mind.
Maya: Huh?
Edgeworth: Give me one of those snacks that you have there, please.
Maya: Oh, sure!
Edgeworth: *takes a big bite of brownie and stares at screen*
Quote:
"YOU WHAT?!" roars the judge.
"I killed Franziska von Karma."
Franziska: Out of all the foolishly foolish ways that this could've gone…
Phoenix: I wonder what his motive could've been?
[Phoenix is curious as to why Edgeworth would do something like that. He responds with revenge.]Quote:
Manfred finally finds his voice. "You… how can you do this to me? I took you into my home and raised you and this is how you repay me?"
Edgeworth: Well, I don't really
owe you much…
Franziska: Despite what he's done, if it wasn't for my papa you would be a sad, worthless heap, Miles Edgeworth!
Maya: Uh, maybe he's still a sad heap?
Edgeworth: I'm not depressed, Maya. I'm perfectly content with the way things are now.
Quote:
"That's rich coming from you," Edgeworth shouts back, "after you tried to set me up for the Gourd Lake murder. Of course, it was easy for me to figure out your plan. You thought I'd want revenge against Robert Hammond for getting my father's murderer off the hook, but you never realized I knew Yanni Yogi was innocent. You see, I was awake when the elevator door opened fifteen years ago… I've known you were the one who killed my father the whole time. And as for you taking me in and raising me, I could have refused to go with you. I'm sure Wright's family would have taken me in, or Larry's. I could have refused to become a prosecutor. But I did go with you. Because where better to form my plans for revenge that in your very own home?"
Maya: Wow, that's a lot to take in all at once…
Phoenix: Wait, wait, wait. So they're trying to tell me that a nine year old kid planned out this whole thing and waited fifteen years to carry it out?
Edgeworth: And if I knew that Yanni Yogi was innocent, why wouldn't I tell the police who the murderer was? That way they wouldn't have to turn to a spirit medium for help…
Maya: Maybe because that's too simple and you wanted a "proper" revenge?
Edgeworth: …That's not how I think.
Franziska: Especially when you were nine years old. You weren't very bright back then.
Quote:
Manfred was speechless with shock and rage, but someone else in the courtroom wasn't.
"How long…" If not for the utter silence in the courtroom, Edgeworth may not have heard the quiet voice from the witness stand. "How long were you planning this…?"
"To kill you? Since the moment I found out you existed," Edgeworth replied offhandedly. "This particular plan, just a few days… once I was invited to Gourd Lake, and realized I already had a perfect alibi for the night, provided by my dear friend Phoenix Wright."
"The Christmas party…" Phoenix groaned, hanging his head.
Phoenix: Umm, at that point in time Edgeworth and I weren't such great buds yet. Why would I invite him to my Christmas party? Especially in an unknown location?
Edgeworth: You still haven't dropped that?
Phoenix: No! Was it at the office? My house? What other places could I have a Christmas party at!?
Quote:
"So, when you called and asked me come for Christmas…" She lets the question hang in the air unfinished. Tears are pouring down her face.
Franziska: I wouldn't be so foolish as to forget to say the word "to" in my speech! *whips floor*
Quote:
The judge comes to senses and orders Edgeworth arrested for Franziska's murder and Manfred arrested on suspicion of being the killer in the DL-6 incident.
Phoenix has the presence of mind to go over to the witness stand and take the distraught young woman into his arms. After being so heartlessly betrayed by someone she trusted, she deserves at least a moment of comfort before she leaves this world once and for all.
*crack*
Phoenix: Gah!
Franziska: I don't need a hug from you; I'll just go back home to wherever dead people go! Besides, this fic it utter foolishness!
*crack*
Phoenix: I-I'm sorry! It won't happen again, I promise.
Franziska: Hmph, good.
Quote:
She slumps against him, and when she opens her eyes Phoenix can see that she is Maya Fey once more.
Maya rubs her eyes as if she is just waking up from a good night's sleep and is surprised to find her face wet with tears.
"Nick, what's going on? Why are they arresting Mr. Edgeworth and Mr. von Karma?"
"I'll… explain later…" Phoenix replies in a strained voice, hugging Maya tightly.
-end-
Franziska: Thank goodness.
Speakers:
Don't get too comfortable yet…Quote:
Alternate Ending
Maya: I think this is the first time that I've seen an alternate ending in a fanfic…
Edgeworth: Those should be left to games and the sort. It would be most unprofessional to have a real published book to have an alternate ending. Then there's no end.
Franziska: No matter what happens, the author can't redeem this farce.
Quote:
She is sitting at the desk, reading, oblivious to the presence of another person in the room.
The gun sits heavily in his pocket. He starts to take it out, then stops. No matter how carefully he may have cultivated this plan, he can't carry it out. Not because it isn't possible. No, this is a perfect opportunity. He is standing right beside her and she hasn't even noticed him. The reason he can't do it is because he knows what will happen to his heart if he fires the bullet that takes her life.
"Merry Christmas, Franziska."
At the sound of his voice, she looks up. He leans down and kisses her firmly on the mouth.
All: …
Phoenix: Well, it went from killing to kissing. That's… quite a leap.
Edgeworth and Franziska: …
Phoenix: Uh, guys?
Edgeworth: *stands up and sits next to Maya*
Franziska: *pulls whip taut*
Quote:
A moment later he pulls away. She stares at him, speechless.
"Why don't you forget about work for one night? This is a holiday," he says, with a soft smile. "I was on my way to a Christmas party. You could come with me…" He leaves the invitation hanging.
Phoenix: …(I invited you, not her! She'd probably scare away what little guests I have…)
Edgeworth: I know what you're thinking, Wright. I believe you should be more concerned with the fact that Larry will most likely be there.
Phoenix: Oh yeah…
Quote:
- at the Christmas party -
"You never told me you were bringing a date," Phoenix says as Edgeworth makes his way toward him with Franziska following close behind.
"It was a last-minute thing," Edgeworth replies. "It's not really a date."
"Of course it's a date," Franziska says with a sly grin, pressing close to his side. Edgeworth returns the grin.
Franziska: Argh!
*crack* *crack* *crack* *crack*
Phoenix: ! (She just… whipped the floor? Well, poor floor, I guess...)
Quote:
There is more than one way to take a man's daughter away from him…
Edgeworth: Well, that is true, but…
Maya: But what? Did you
want to kill Ms. von Karma?
Edgeworth: No, of course not. It's just that…
Phoenix: Just what?
Edgeworth: Never mind. It's unimportant.
Speakers:
Well, the fic is over. So if you would all proceed to the Christmas tree to get your presents… That includes you, Franziska.Franziska: *annoyed huff*
Maya: C'mon, let's go! Who gets to open theirs first? Can I?
Speakers:
Yeah, you can go first. After you Phoenix Wright can go.Maya: Goody! Mine's so big, I wonder what it could be?
[Maya wastes no time in tearing the paper off the present. In fact, she even manages to get the bow stuck in Phoenix's hair. I wonder how that could've happened…]Maya: A… statue of burgers? Hey, it looks so yummy I could eat it!
Phoenix: Um, how are you going to get that home?
Maya: Hmm, good question. I don't think the elders would like this in the village…
Speakers:
We'll use the teleporter, no worries. And we'll teleport it to the office. That solves the problem!Phoenix: (Oh joy…)
Speakers:
Your turn, Phoenix Wright.[Phoenix takes much more time to unwrap his present. It almost seems like he's doing it on purpose…]Maya: C'mon you old fart! What's taking so long? *tears the rest of the paper off for him*
Phoenix: It's… an apron, a washcloth, and some soap?
Speakers:
That way, you'll be able to clean more than just the toilet. Isn't it great?Phoenix: Yes, how thoughtful… (What does an apron have to do with cleaning?)
Speakers:
You're up, Franziska.Franziska: Let's get this over with. *tears paper off quickly*
Edgeworth: You got a book titled "Law for Dummies?"
Phoenix: *snicker*
Franziska: …You must've given this to the wrong person. *hands book to Phoenix* This is the perfect book for you. I want Chapter 1 read for tomorrow morning, is that clear?
Phoenix: Yeah, thanks… (Now I've got homework for Christmas…)
Edgeworth: I suppose I'm last…
[Edgeworth carefully takes off the paper, as if he's going to reuse it later. In his hand is a box.]Maya: Open it, open it!
Edgeworth: It's a porcelain doll. Very funny, management.
Speakers:
Huh!? We didn't… Oh yeah, uh, your real present will arrive shortly. We just wanted to play a trick! Haha, yes, that's exactly what we wanted to do![A Santa hat falls from the ceiling, right onto Edgeworth's lap.]Maya: Aww, how cute! You should put it on, Mr. Edgeworth!
Edgeworth: Uh, maybe later.
Maya: Why not now!? I can put it on for you if you like!
Phoenix: Maya, just leave Edgeworth alone for now. Look, your present was already teleported to my office. Don't you want to see it?
Maya: Oh yeah. Let's go, Nick!
[They both leave the theatre with Edgeworth and Franziska right behind them, and that brings our Christmas sporking to a close. We hope you enjoyed that! We hope you all had a Merry Christmas!]Speakers:
…[Is there something wrong, sir?]Speakers:
We totally put that doll in there, definitely. The Janitor will throw it away later today. It was such a funny joke, right, narrator? Hahaha…[Whatever you say, sir.]